by Kitty Thomas
Once they were locked in and the security system was engaged, he untied her wrists. “Don't hit me, and don't try to run. I don't want to keep you tied up like an animal, but I'll do whatever I have to. I am fully aware that I'm breaking the law right now. I couldn't leave you in that house with that monster, but I'm not willing to go to prison for you. Don't push me into a corner where this has to go to an ugly place.”
She wondered if he'd been thinking that speech up during the long car ride while she'd been unconscious.
“Come into the kitchen. I made some beef stew before Lindsay called.”
She followed him to the kitchen. She needed him to believe she would comply with all this so he'd let his guard down. It wasn't as though he were a seasoned criminal. It was doubtful he'd ever kept anyone imprisoned in his home, despite all the bondage equipment in his basement.
She watched as Damian began to reheat the large pot of stew, then he came to stand behind her. He swept her hair out of his way and kissed the side of her neck. He ran his fingertips gently over her back.
She winced. “Please...”
He raised her shirt to look at the bandages. “How bad did he hurt you?”
“Not bad. It's just tender.”
“When you heal we could try to get the scars removed,” he said.
Shannon jerked away from his touch. “No! If you take them from me I'll never forgive you.”
Where had that come from? She'd wanted the scars gone ever since the moment they'd been created. But somehow between the time she'd become Lindsay's and now, something had shifted. Those marks had stopped being about Brian a long time ago.
Hadn't she realized as much in the dungeon when she thought Brian might kill her tonight? Somehow the scars had gone from being Brian's mark of pain and destruction to Lindsay's mark of protection and safety. They were the only thing she had left from him, and she wasn't willing to give them up.
Damian moved around to the other side of the counter, carefully watching her. “I thought you wanted them gone.”
“I don't.”
He held up his hands as if in surrender, even though they both knew he held all the power. “Okay.”
“Okay I can keep them?”
Damian nodded. He was still figuring her out. She wondered if he'd put it together yet. When he did, would he try to have the scars removed to erase Lindsay from her forever?
When the stew started to bubble on the stove, Damian reduced the heat, and ladled some into bowls.
She spotted his keys sitting on the counter. She was so tempted to try to take them, but there wasn't enough time.
“Do you want crackers?” he asked turning back to her.
“Yes, Sir,” she said, trying not to look at his car keys.
He let the lesser title go and put a box of round crackers on the counter.
They ate in uncomfortable silence, the only sound the ticking of a modern-style grandfather clock over the fireplace mantle.
When they finished, Damian took their bowls and put them in the sink. “Let's go to bed. It's been a long day.”
How was it possible that only that morning they'd been laughing together? She'd liked him, been excited about seeing him again. And now all she could think about was getting away from him and getting back to Lindsay. She wasn't some stray dog who could just shift her allegiance with a little petting and a warm meal.
Shannon followed him up the clear see-through stairs, clinging to the railing, still unnerved by them.
Damian had a king-sized bed. The bedding was thick and black with a seemingly endless supply of pillows. The one spectacular thing about this house was the view. She stood absolutely still when he started undressing her. She wondered if he'd try to fuck her tonight.
“Get in the bed,” he said when the only thing she wore was the bandages on her back.
Shannon crawled into bed and laid down, tense, waiting as Damian undressed and got in behind her. But he didn't try to fuck her, he just put his arm around her and held her.
74
Lindsay sat in his office at the house. He'd been sitting there for hours, staring at papers, pretending to work. He'd brought back a stack of client files from the city. He needed to go through them to find new candidates for the house. He'd won one of the girls from the art show, but they still had a few more openings. Yet all he'd done since Shannon left with Damian had been to sit and stare.
“You okay in here?”
He looked up to find Gabe standing in the doorway, a concerned look on his face.
“I'll be fine. It was what's best for her. It's safest.”
He couldn't shake off the image of Shannon looking at him, so betrayed after he'd sedated her. Would that really be frozen in time as the last moment they shared together? Him sticking a needle in her arm?
“Have you eaten anything?” Gabe asked.
He shook his head.
“You should eat something.”
“What would you have done?” Lindsay asked.
“I would have killed Brian.”
That would have been the easy solution. Except that it wasn't. No matter how simple he wanted it to be, Mina would be destroyed.
He often wished he were more like Brian, that he could just take what he wanted, however he wanted it, without any guilt or second guessing troubling his mental waters. But he over thought everything. It was a benefit with his work, but a liability everywhere else.
“I'm going to bring you some food,” Gabe said.
Lindsay shrugged at that. When Gabe had gone, he took the case with Shannon's collar out of the top drawer. He opened it and stared. The collar glittered and gleamed, reflecting all the hope and promise he'd had for them. Had he really believed he deserved a happy ending? After all the lines he'd crossed? The lives he'd ruined? However unintentionally.
He snapped the case shut and put it back in the drawer, this time locking it. He knew he should get rid of it. Give it to someone. Sell it. Throw it out. He couldn't just keep it like some strange shrine to her. He'd hold onto it a few weeks, he decided. Then he'd let it go. He almost believed this lie.
Gabe reappeared in the doorway a few minutes later with a plate of Chicken Parmesan, garlic bread, and a glass of iced tea, then left him alone with dinner.
He'd only gotten a few bites in when he was interrupted yet again.
“Doc.”
Lindsay glared up at Brian. He leaned casually against the door frame, his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans. He had a bandage on his head, no doubt Mina's caretaking.
“I don't know why I didn't kill you.”
Brian shrugged. “Now you know how it feels, to have someone try to get in the middle of what's yours. Doesn't feel so nice, does it? When someone else is writing the rules and controlling things?”
“Get out.”
“I never would have let Mina go,” Brian said.
“You didn't have to worry about a psychopath torturing her to death, either.”
Brian's eyes narrowed. “Name calling? Is that what it's come to between us?”
“It's come to a lot of things.”
Shannon waited until she was sure Damian was asleep before slipping out from under his arm and out of bed. She took her clothes into the hallway and quietly put them on. She closed her eyes and held onto the wall as she made her way down the stairs. If she closed her eyes she could pretend they were normal stairs. They felt more solid this way. Safer.
When she reached the bottom, her gaze strayed back up to Damian's room. He still appeared to be in bed—and asleep if the darkness was any indication. She punched in the security code. The system made a tiny beep and then shut off.
Outside it was windy. She went around to the back of the house and stood on the rocks at the edge. A small piece broke off and fell a long way down before it finally hit the water. She stepped back until she was sure she was on safe, solid ground. The moon was full, illuminating the waves crashing against the rocks below.
Not too ve
ry long ago, she would have seen an escape here at the edge of this cliff. A quick drop into oblivion. As easy as pills? She wasn't sure. She didn't plan to ever find out. She just wanted to see the water and feel the sea breeze on her face. In another set of circumstances she could have found happiness in this expansive glass house by the sea. She stood for several minutes smelling the salt and watching the water, then went back inside, grabbed Damian's car keys off the kitchen counter, and just... left.
He'd been so sure the security system would keep her inside. That the alarm would wake him. Or maybe he'd just been tired and distracted. Maybe he'd thought he would feel or know if she left his room. Maybe he hadn't realized he'd left his keys out.
She'd driven about five miles before she was able to fully acknowledge what she was doing. She should take this opportunity and go to the police and report... who?
She could definitely report Brian, but not without hurting Lindsay or other people at the house she cared about. She didn't want to care if she hurt Lindsay. He'd hurt her. He'd thrown her away. It was the worst thing he could possibly do to her, and he knew it.
And what would she report Damian for? Trying to protect her from Brian? For giving her a life and a home away from him? For feeding her beef stew and tucking her into a warm bed with the sound of the ocean waves to lull her to sleep? For offering her everything she'd ever thought she'd wanted wrapped in exactly the kind of package she'd always dreamed of? What a monster.
Yes, he'd kidnapped her, technically. He'd taken her when Lindsay had drugged her and tied her up in his car and locked her in his house. But he wasn't the villain. He was trying to protect her.
It wasn't like she had a life to go back to anymore. There was only one life she wanted, and... he didn't want her.
She could still go back to the big glass house and get back in bed with Damian. She could see a future with him. A happy future. She did want him. Only a few hours ago she hadn't been able to wipe the goofy smile from her face from the new things he'd introduced her to and made her crave over a couple of short days.
But she kept driving farther and farther away from the cliff and the ocean and the smell of the salt. She didn't know exactly how to get back to the city from here. She'd been unconscious most of this trip and the last time she'd been paying more attention to Lindsay than the drive. but Damian's car had GPS. She could reverse engineer and retrace her way back into the city. From there she knew where she was going. She'd been on the trip to and from the house with Lindsay so many times.
She knew it was insane to go back. She knew that Brian would probably kill her even as she entertained fantasies of hiding in that enormous house and just never crossing paths with him again. But she was so tired of being the background of everyone else's life. She wanted to make her own choice about something. If it was a risk, so be it. If she could die, so be it. At least she was making her own choice for the first time in longer than she could remember.
However foolish or dangerous, she wanted to make a clear and definite choice for what she wanted without any coercion, without any influence from anyone outside herself. She wanted to take her own chances for once and let the chips of her life fall where they may. She wanted to be someone who was strong and brave, who didn't just cling to others for rescue.
It was deep into the night when she reached the house. She parked Damian's BMW outside the gate. The gate creaked open when she punched the code in.
She crept around to the back of the house beside the pool. The guys had stopped using an alarm on the house itself years ago due to the security bracelets and the perimeter. The door by the pool was often left unlocked. Both Annette and Mina sometimes liked to take midnight swims. Shannon held her breath as she tried the door. It clicked easily open in her hand.
The first place she went was Lindsay's office. There was a fifty/fifty chance he'd left it unlocked. He often did. He'd started locking up the drugs and important papers in a cabinet, but often left the main door unlocked—probably because he didn't want to have to remember keys every time he went to his office in his own home.
This door, too, opened easily.
But the desk drawer that he'd put her collar in was locked.
“Dammit,” she hissed. She should be grateful she'd gotten this far. But she wasn't prepared to give up. She had no idea where Lindsay keep the key, but she didn't need the key. She just needed a hammer. What difference did it make if he punished her for ruining his desk in light of everything else she was doing? And if Brian got his hands on her again, well... any threat from Lindsay paled in comparison.
She slipped quietly down the hallway, past the fitness room where she could hear the treadmill going.
Fuck. Brian was awake. Running again. Always running. The treadmill kept it's steady pace, and she continued down the darkened hallway. She went to the supply closet and rummaged through box after box until she finally found the tools.
When she returned to the office, she jumped and let out a surprised yelp when Brian spun around in the chair.
“Whatcha doin' with the hammer?”
Shannon took a step back, hovering in the doorway. She felt the edges of panic creeping into her. The last person she wanted to notice her presence was Brian. Whatever stupid brave front she'd been putting on, Brian was still the last person she'd wanted to see tonight.
Maybe she'd hoped she could get to Lindsay and convince him to find another way. Given enough time to argue her case, she could convince him to run with her. Maybe Brian would catch them, but maybe he wouldn't. Maybe he would lose interest.
Now she might never get the chance to have that conversation. Nobody else knew she was here. Brian could take her downstairs and... he could do anything. Nobody would stop him.
Suddenly she couldn't breathe right as the cold clammy dread wrapped around her like the whip marks on her shoulders.
“Shannon? What's the hammer for?” he asked again.
“I-I need to get into the top drawer.”
“Why?”
“My collar's in there.”
“You'd risk being in the same house with me to be with him?”
“Y-yes, Sir.” In truth, through all the tough mental self-talk somehow the full reality of Brian hadn't occurred to her on the drive until she'd actually reached the house. It wasn't as though she didn't understand it, she'd just been furiously blocking it from her consciousness so she didn't have to deal with it—sure she could safely reach her master one more time.
And maybe she was still in shock from earlier. She felt the bandages pressed against her back, and a tear slipped down her cheek.
He rose out of the chair and moved around the desk into her space. “You were safe. Completely out of my reach.” He stroked the side of her cheek.
Shannon cringed from him and gripped the hammer more tightly in her hand. That wasn't true. She was never out of his reach, he'd just decided to let her go as long as it meant Lindsay would be miserable.
“Gonna hit me with that?”
She shook her head. “N-no, Sir.” She might if she thought she could actually kill him, but then she had no doubt Mina would kill her. So as nice as the fantasy was...
She whimpered as he bent next to her and pulled a small key out of the potted plant beside the door. “This might be easier.”
Shannon took the offered key, wondering what his game was. He stepped aside, and she moved quickly past him back into the office. He stood in the doorway watching as she unlocked the desk drawer and pulled out the smooth black box that held her collar.
She was painfully and terrifyingly aware of the fact that Brian blocked her exit. But she tried not to think about it. She opened the box, took out the collar, and slipped the platinum and diamonds around her throat.
She looked up hoping to find Brian had evaporated from the room like a ghost. But he still stood leaning against the door frame, his arms crossed over his chest. Watching her.
Finally he spoke. “You know, I fucking hate him. Shit hasn
't been right with me and the doc since he brought Mina to the house. But I'm developing a grudging respect for you, princess.” Then he turned and went back down the hall to the fitness room to continue his run.
What the hell did that mean?
Shannon gripped the edge of the desk and struggled to pull herself up to stand. The adrenaline dump from his closeness had turned her legs to useless jelly. After several shaky breaths, she left the office and closed the door behind her.
She took the elevator up to the second floor because she didn't trust her legs to take her up a full flight of stairs. She hesitated outside Lindsay's door. If she went in there, she might wake him. And she desperately wanted to sleep, not fight all night. She went down the hall to one of the empty rooms and ripped the blankets and pillows off the bed then returned and made a little bed in the doorway of Lindsay's room. Anything they had to say would be better left for morning.
75
Lindsay opened his door and nearly tripped over a bundle of... Shannon? She was curled up with blankets and pillows on the ground. For a moment his brain refused to put together the scene in front of him. She'd come back? How had she come back? Did she run away? Had Damian hurt her?
No. He wouldn't. Lindsay was sure of it. He felt unbelievably happy at the sight of her there, waiting outside his room, all wrapped up like a gift for him. He shook his head. He couldn't go there. He couldn't let himself think about what he wanted. Nothing had changed about their situation. Brian was still a threat. It wasn't safe for her here. If Brian got hold of her even one more time, she wouldn't survive the encounter.
Why had she come back? Why would she put herself in harm's way? In Brian's way?
Lindsay cleared his throat to wake her. When her eyes fluttered open he said “What are you doing here?”