by Kitty Thomas
He didn't call her by his pet name for her, and it was clear from the expression on her face that she'd noticed this omission.
“Master, I...”
“No,” Lindsay said. “I gave you to Brand. He's your master, now.”
Tears began to well in her eyes. Lindsay's jaw tightened. He couldn't be moved by her tears. She had to understand this. He'd done this for her. For her safety. Damian was a better match for her in every way. He had more time for her. He was near her age. He didn't live in an isolated mansion with a psychopath who wanted to destroy her.
“Fuck that, and fuck you!” She ripped the blankets off and stood, staring him down. Technically she looked up at him, but she may as well have been glaring down her nose for that look in her eyes.
He almost took a step back even though he was twice her size because he'd never seen her with quite this much fury before. He noticed suddenly that she wore his collar. How had she gotten into the locked drawer?
“Did Damian harm you?”
“No, he didn't harm me. But I want to be with you! Don't you want me anymore? You'd just... throw me away? You didn't even let me have a say in it.”
“You were mine to do with as I wished.” He said the words coldly, hoping he could dissuade her and push her back into Damian's arms even as he wanted her in his own.
“I want to be yours again,” she said.
“We can't... Brian will...”
“Fuck Brian. I'm not willing to lose this... what we have, over... that psycho. There has to be another solution.”
“But you like Damian. And he's closer to your own age.”
“I don't care! I want you! I want to be with you. You made me trust you and fall in love with you. You woke up something inside me I thought was gone forever. You think I can just shut that off because you've conveniently found some hot guy who can give me orgasms?”
Lindsay let out a long breath trying to ignore most of that little speech because he wanted to give in. He wanted to keep her. Even though he knew it put her in danger.
“Even without Brian... I'm so much older than you, and some day...”
She interrupted him. “Some day isn't today. If you aren't going to keep me, just give me back to Brian and let him kill me. If I can't be with you, he wins anyway.”
He'd had no idea she'd gotten this... attached. Or that she ever had this much fire inside her. It was so painfully attractive.
“How did you get here?” he asked.
“I figured out the security code and stole his car.” Off Lindsay's shocked and somewhat amused expression, she continued, “What's he going to do? Go to the police? And say what? My slave escaped from me and stole my car and took it to the criminal enterprise where they trained her, please go get my car?”
It wasn't certain Damian would know where she'd taken his car, but point taken.
How was it possible that this woman... this strong, brave woman could have been at the point of suicide only a few short months ago? How was it that she had faced Brian again, the sum of all her fears, and even then had come back to this house? From a therapeutic perspective she was an amazing successful case study. But she wasn't a case study. She was Shannon.
Lindsay sighed. “Even if you could stay, you know you'd have to be punished for... all of this.”
“I know,” she said, looking down, that hint of submission resurfacing at even the hope he'd take her back into his bed and his life.
“Go into my room and stay there. Lock the door, and do not open it until you hear my voice on the other side. I need to call Damian, and I need to talk to Brian.”
“I'll be yours again?”
“I don't know yet. I can't promise anything.”
She went into the room, and slammed and locked the door, making her displeasure at his hesitance known. It wasn't as though he didn't want her. For god's sake she was everything he'd ever hoped to find. But he couldn't put his own needs above her fucking life.
He looked up to find Brian lurking a few yards away in the hallway, looking as though he'd heard, if not everything, then most of everything.
Lindsay moved toward the other man to keep their conversation well out of Shannon's hearing.
“She's safe with me,” Brian said before Lindsay could go into one of the versions of the practiced speech he'd been trying to form before he'd noticed Brian standing there.
“And why would I trust that?” Lindsay asked. “After everything that's transpired. After yesterday, do you actually believe I would trust that you no longer have it out for me?”
Brian laughed. “I said she is safe. I'm not over what you did when Mina came to the house. I'll probably never be over it. But your girl, is safe. I'll honor your claim on her. But it's for her, not you.”
“Why?”
“She's brave. She impressed me. I think it's wasted on you, but whatever.”
“So you regret what you did to her?” Lindsay pushed. Could Brian be growing as a person? Could there be a conscience somewhere inside him?
The other man laughed, a cold cruel sound bouncing off the walls of the tight hallway. “Do you need to go back to Shrink School, Doc? Do we need to go over the sociopath section of the lesson plan again? Fuck no, I'm not sorry. I've never regretted anything except for one person.”
Mina. Her name hung on the air between them unspoken. It baffled Lindsay that Brian could feel such regret and horror for a mistake he'd made with Mina that in many ways paled to what he'd done to Shannon, yet could feel nothing when it came to Shannon's pain and suffering at his hands.
“Fine,” Lindsay finally said. He'd only just started his day and already he felt exhausted. And Shannon still had a punishment coming.
“Great. Are we done with the touchy-feely hug-it-out session? It's making my skin crawl.”
“We're done. But if you ever touch her...”
“I know... you'll become the new resident killer. Blah blah blah. You didn't do it yesterday, so I don't see why you think it's a credible threat now, barely twelve hours later.”
Lindsay stepped closer into Brian's personal space. He was actually a bit taller and broader than Brian. It was only the other man's unapologetic sadism and unflinching willingness to torture and kill people that made him seem like the biggest, scariest thing in the house.
Brian saw the intimidation tactic for what it was and sneered.
Lindsay lowered his voice. “I didn't follow through because I knew it would destroy Mina, and she would probably kill me for it. But during the night I've worked through that. If you ever touch Shannon again, I will kill you both.”
Brian looked confused a moment. “Me and Shannon?”
Lindsay rolled his eyes. “You and Mina.”
Something went dark and cold inside Brian's stare. Darker and colder than usual. “Don't you dare threaten her again,” he growled.
“Then don't touch Shannon.”
“I already said I wouldn't.”
“Well, now I know you won't.”
“What makes you think I won't just kill you right now and then take this little conversation out on Shannon until I get bored playing with her?”
Lindsay just stood there, lost for words for a moment.
“I see the light has finally dawned,” Brian said. “But nice speech. Real scary.”
Lindsay started to reply but Brian interrupted him before he could speak.
“I always knew I was right about you. You're a dangerous dog that needs to be put down. But I won't. For her,” Brian said.
“Mina?”
“No, Shannon,” he ground out. “After tonight I realize that I actually like that girl. She's on my list now.”
“Your list?”
“The protect list. The no touching list. The very very short list of people that I'm not going to snap and go rabid on. The list. Besides, she's Mina's friend.” He sighed. “It would hurt Mina, and I promised her years ago I would try to avoid hurting her even indirectly. If I killed Shannon, it would probab
ly hurt my relationship with Mina.”
Lindsay laughed at that. A cold laugh. “He finally learns cause and effect and consequences.”
“Look, I'm not a fucking idiot, Doc. I can do long term planning and thinking just as well as you.”
“So it would seem we're at a stalemate,” Lindsay said, not liking the direction this conversation had turned or that Brian would consider him in a class that was more dangerous than himself. And not as a compliment.
“You don't touch Mina. I don't touch Shannon, and everybody gets to live another day. Seems pretty clear to me,” Brian said.
He spit on the ground barely missing the Italian leather of Lindsay's shoes. Then he turned on his heel and disappeared down the hallway.
Lindsay sighed again and went down to his office to call Damian. He'd be wanting his car back and an explanation.
When Damian woke, she was gone. The space on the bed was cold beside him so she'd been gone for a long time. Probably hours. He hadn't felt her get out of bed or heard her leave. He let out a long sigh. At least there weren't any cops busting down his door, and no blue lights.
The thing about his house was: nothing could happen outside that he couldn't see—if he was awake, anyway. But the police didn't tend to leave and come back later if they wanted to arrest you. So that was that? This was over, then?
He had no idea how the alarm hadn't woken him. Had she actually figured out the code? Had she seen the numbers he punched in? He thought he'd been too quick for that, and she'd been too disoriented from the sedative still wearing off to see the code.
But he'd left the keys very visibly on the counter. She probably thought he'd been too cocky or too tired, but he'd left those keys for her. The truth was he did want to own her. Absolutely and truly. But he didn't think he had it in him to break her down piece-by-piece.
So he'd let her go. Actually, he'd be lying to himself if he said he hadn't wanted to wake and find her still in bed with him. He had wanted that. He'd hoped she'd come to see this was the best thing. Damian could take care of her. He could give her everything she wanted and needed. She could be his, and she could be happy. If she'd just let herself forget the doctor.
But he didn't want to keep her if all she wanted was to be with someone else.
She wouldn't go back to the house. Not after what had happened. Lindsay's decision had been very final, and Brian was too dangerous. She might want to, but she wouldn't. Damian was sure she wouldn't have gone to the police, either. But if she had, she'd decided not to implicate him.
He swallowed hard. Would she have implicated Lindsay and the house? Damian knew if she told anyone about the house, he was a dead man.
Fuck. What had he been thinking? He'd just wanted to give her one out. Because he wasn't a monster. He was sure she'd get halfway down the road and turn around and come back, realizing the futility, that there was nowhere for her to go and he was her best option. He wanted her to choose him. Then he would close off her options and never let her go.
He turned on the news. There was no story.
His phone rang. “Yes,” he said.
“You couldn't manage to keep one girl locked up?” Lindsay's tone was harsh.
Before Damian could figure out how to play this, Lindsay said, “She's here. Get your ass over here so we can figure out what to do with her.” The call disconnected.
Fuck.
Damian went downstairs and made some breakfast and some very strong coffee and ate and thought. The truth was, he thought she'd stay. He wanted her to feel it was the safe choice because of how loosely she was kept. Lindsay had warned him though. He'd said she needed to feel secure, and that much freedom wouldn't make her feel secure.
On the drive home with her, Damian had run through every possible scenario in his head. She couldn't and wouldn't go back to the house. That was madness. She may have once made an attempt on her own life but that was out of hopelessness, not some embedded death wish.
He'd also thought she wouldn't go to the police because what would she do after that? Where would she go? How would she take care of herself after having just disappeared from the face of the planet for eight years? The idea was absurd.
Damian was sure he was the only choice. She might be upset and sad for a while but they'd find that easy way between them again just like they had a couple of days before. Within a few weeks everything would be fine and she'd be firmly his. And it wouldn't involve breaking her or making her hate or fear him.
And that plan had gone off splendidly. Lindsay was going to fucking kill him. In fact, maybe he shouldn't go to the house at all. Damian hesitated in the garage next to one of his cars.
Fuck it. Lindsay knew where he lived, and Damian was not going to live his life on the run from a man he'd considered a friend. He got into the car, plugged the address into the GPS, and drove.
76
Shannon waited in the private dungeon Lindsay had set up on the far end of the house. She was naked, on her knees, legs spread, waiting for him. For them. Damian was on his way. Actually Damian had been at the house for a while now, Mina had come down to the dungeon and given her the heads up that they were discussing things, but she wouldn't give details. Maybe she didn't have them to give.
Shannon didn't know the specifics, but when Lindsay had come back to their room earlier he'd been absolutely sure she was safe with Brian now. She hadn't questioned that because she'd felt something shift in him when they'd had that encounter in Lindsay's office and he'd given her the key to the desk drawer.
The cell door opened. She heard two pairs of footsteps. She didn't look up. She was too afraid to look up. It had been a long time since Mina had come down here. She'd said there had been yelling and a long standoff of some sort as Damian and Lindsay worked out whatever issues they had between them. And now here the two men were, with whatever decree they'd decided upon. Whatever punishment. Whatever final outcome.
She held her breath, willing herself not to cry.
“Kitten, look at me.”
Her gaze rose to Lindsay, avoiding Damian's eyes.
“From this point onward you will call both of us master, whether you are alone with one of us or we are all together, do you understand?”
“Yes, Master,” she said softly.
He was keeping her? They were both keeping her? She could barely believe any of this was happening. They both wanted her? That seemed the most impossible of all the realizations. She'd been certain after Brian had damaged her all those years ago that no one would ever truly want her again, that she would be alone for the rest of her life. And now she was getting both of these beautiful men along with all the promises Lindsay had made to her so many years ago before bringing her to the house. Was this real?
Lindsay continued, “This is how it will be, kitten. You will live with me and go to work with me during the week. On Fridays, the three of us will have dinner. Sometimes at Damian's, sometimes at a nice restaurant. Occasionally we may all attend parties or other functions together. The three of us will play together on Friday nights, after which, I'll return to the house for the rest of weekend when Damian will get you to himself.
“He'll return you to me at the office each Monday morning. He may show up during the week for lunch. At some point in the distant future, this balance will shift in the other direction, and you'll spend most of your time with him and see me on the weekends. This is not a debate or discussion. It's what Damian and I have decided. Is this all clear?”
“Yes, Master.” Was that why he'd introduced Damian? So she wouldn't end up alone again? Silent tears started to fall down her face. The thought had crossed her mind that the age difference could leave her even more alone down the road, but she hadn't cared. She'd wanted to grab onto this one good thing and not worry about what happened a decade or two from now.
“Good girl,” he said. “Now, crawl over to Damian. We both get the full protocol.”
Shannon swallowed around the lump in her throat. She still hadn't loo
ked at Damian. She crawled over to him and pressed her lips against his shoes then moved back into her kneeling position, this time next to Damian and said, “Master.”
She heard the breath that tumbled out of him when she used that word for him. She didn't know how she knew it, but that sound was satisfaction.
“Look at me, baby,” Damian said.
She looked up. She wasn't sure what she'd expected to see in his eyes. Anger, disappointment, betrayal for running. But what she found in his gaze instead was pure raw animal desire. She'd been wrong. She wasn't a do-a-friend-a-favor fuck. He wanted her. She didn't understand how, but he wanted her.
“I am the only one who will fuck your ass, do you understand me?” he asked.
She started to turn to Lindsay to get his reaction to this but Damian's hand rested on the side of her face, blocking her from turning.
“Don't look at him. Answer me.”
“Y-yes, Master,” she said.
“If there is any conflict, Lindsay and I will work it out between us and then we will bring our decision to you. You will not play us off each other, and we won't put you in a position to betray one of us with contradictory demands you can't obey.”
Damian reached around behind her throat and removed the collar. Then he passed it to Lindsay. She couldn't stop the tears spilling out at the loss.
“Why can't I keep it?” she asked.
Lindsay spoke then. “It isn't appropriate for you to wear my collar when you belong to both of us.”
“So I'm not going to have one?” she asked, trying to hold back the tears in her voice.
“I didn't say that. For now you won't have one. Let Damian and I handle it.”
She nodded.
Damian's hand was in her hair then, stroking. “I'm going to punish you, not because you ran from me but because you put yourself in danger by coming back here. But I won't do it until your back heals. For now, we're just going to spend some time together.”
Some silent communication passed between Lindsay and Damian, then Damian took her hands in his and helped her to her feet. He led her to one corner of the room.