by Maya Banks
“Why don’t I remember them? Or Sam or Donovan?” She shook her head in confusion. “I don’t remember your parents either, and it sounds like I was close to your mom.”
“Give it time, sweet pea. You’ve got all the time in the world now. You have nothing to worry about other than resting and letting us all take care of you.”
“They aren’t...” She trailed off and looked down.
“They aren’t what?”
“Sam isn’t mad because I can’t remember him? Or Donovan?”
Garrett took her hand in his, letting her fingers lie over his much larger ones. “No one is angry with you. We all love you. Sam and Donovan too. They just want you home where you’re safe and healthy.”
“I want to go home. It’s so hard for me to believe I have a home. I used to dream. I thought I made the memories up but now I know they really happened.”
“What kinds of things?” Garrett asked.
She pursed her lips, concentrating on the haphazard images dancing in her mind. “There’s a lake and a dock. I’m barefooted and wearing shorts. You’re standing in front of me and Ethan is behind. I run to you thinking that you’ll save me from Ethan, but you pick me up and toss me into the water.”
A warm smile transformed the darkness of his features. She stared at him in fascination.
“You don’t smile much.”
He gave her a startled look.
“I know that,” she said, “and I also know that you smile for me. I remember that. I remember that I can make you laugh and that everyone teases you about being so grouchy.”
He chuckled lightly. “Yes, I’m grouchy and yes you can always make me laugh. Yes, I threw you in the water when I was supposed to be saving you from Ethan. You paid me back later, though.”
“Oh?” She leaned up in the bed in her excitement. Information. Details. She craved them as much as her body craved the drugs.
“You conned Sam, Donovan, Joe and Nathan into ganging up on me and tossing me into the lake. It took all four I might add, but you got your revenge. I took two in with me,” he added smugly.
She smiled, feeling the wonder of his words clear to her soul. It did sound like she had family, like they were all a family.
And then she frowned again. “Why am I so afraid of Sam? It sounds like I had a good relationship with him.”
“Because you can’t remember him yet. You fear the unknown. You remember me and Ethan so you feel comfortable with us. As more of your memory returns, you’ll remember how comfortable you were with us all.”
She nodded, grasping onto his explanation, drawing comfort from the idea that she wouldn’t be this scared mouse forever. And then she had an unsettling thought. What if she had always been this timid?
Garrett laughed, and she realized she’d voiced the question aloud.
“You’ve always been quiet and shy, particularly around new people, but I’d never call you timid. You fit into our family as if you’d been born a Kelly, and you never took any crap off anyone. No one could survive our family for an extended period of time if they were timid. We’re loud, noisy...”
“But we protect our own,” she said as if repeating someone else’s words.
“The Kelly mantra. See, you remember more than you think.”
“Don’t fuck with the Kellys,” she said and then her eyes widened as the expletive rolled off her tongue. She slapped a hand over her mouth and stared at Garrett with shocked eyes.
He threw back his head and laughed. “Got it in one, sweet pea. I couldn’t have said it better myself.”
Ethan stood just outside the door, listening to Garrett and Rachel talk. Then he heard Garrett’s laughter and then astonishingly Rachel’s as well. The sound hit him where he lived, put a chokehold around his throat until he struggled to breathe. There wasn’t a more beautiful sound than her laughter, but he hadn’t been the one to coax it from her. Garrett had. Just as he always had.
He willed the bitterness, the old feelings of insecurity and jealousy to leave him. They’d never brought him anything but misery. Him and Rachel both. He couldn’t, he wouldn’t allow that back into their lives. He’d sworn on Rachel’s grave that if he had a chance to do it all over again, he wouldn’t give in to the jealousy that nearly ate him alive during their marriage.
“Why do I have blood on my clothes?” she asked when the laughter died away.
“Just an accident with the IV,” Garrett replied. “Want me to get you something clean to wear?”
There was a brief hesitation, and Ethan couldn’t stand outside any longer. He walked into the room, making sure his face didn’t reflect the dark train of his thoughts.
When she looked up, he forgot all about everything else except the way she lit up when she saw him. Garrett got off the bed and turned to face Ethan.
“I’ll go get her something else to wear if you want.”
“Thanks, I appreciate it. Check with Maren. She said she had a clean gown she could wear when she woke.”
Garrett nodded and started to move past him, but Ethan stopped him.
“Thanks, man.”
Garrett didn’t react, just nodded and moved past as if it were nothing. As if Rachel’s laughter hadn’t about put Ethan on his knees.
Ethan moved forward to take Garrett’s place on the bed. “Garrett been taking good care of you?” he asked as he settled into place.
She smiled and nodded. “He said you wouldn’t be long.”
“I wouldn’t have left, but I needed to see Sam and Donovan off.”
“Off? Did they leave?”
He nodded. “They went ahead of us. Cole and Dolphin needed medical care, and Sam and Donovan are going to break the news to Mom and Dad. As soon as Maren gives the okay for you to travel, we’ll go back too.”
“I want to go home,” she said softly. “I don’t like it here.”
“I know, baby. I want you home too. You can’t imagine how much I want you back in our house, where I can hold you and take care of you.”
She stared up at him with wide brown eyes. There was a certain amount of trepidation in her gaze, and she licked her lips as if she was struggling with what she wanted to say.
“Is there something wrong?” he asked.
She gave a short negative motion with her head. And then words, so sweet, like a cool northern breeze blowing off the lake. “You could hold me now.”
It was almost his undoing.
“Ah baby.”
He turned and reclined beside her until she was tucked solidly against his chest. Then he wrapped his arms around her, one sliding underneath her head as he gathered her close.
Her heart beat against his chest, fluttering like a baby bird. She gave a contented sigh that he felt all the way to his soul.
Life didn’t get any better than this moment. It would never be sweeter, and he’d never hungered for something more.
Garrett walked in a second later, but when he saw them, he dropped the gown on the end of the bed and quickly retreated.
She could change later. For now Ethan was reluctant to disturb the wonder of having his wife snuggled deep in his arms.
CHAPTER 13
MARLENE had just set dinner on the table when she heard the front door open and the sweetest words filled her ears.
“Ma, we’re home! Where are you?”
She turned just as Joe and Nathan rounded the corner, both grinning like idiots, with bags slung over their shoulders. They let them fall to the floor about the time her mouth did the same.
“Nathan! Joe!”
She dropped the casserole dish on the table and flew around to hug them both. Joe gathered her in his arms and swung her around, and she was promptly swept into Nathan’s as soon as Joe let go.
“My boys, oh my God, what are you two doing home?”
“Hey, Dad,” Nathan said as Frank got up.
Frank enfolded both the boys in a hearty embrace. When he pulled away, his eyes were suspiciously wet.
“W
hat the hell are you two doing home? Why didn’t you call us?”
“We weren’t sure we were going to wrangle the leave,” Joe said. “We tried to get home for . . .”
“We’d hoped to get home on the sixteenth,” Nathan said quietly .
“That was good of you,” Marlene said. “I’m sure Ethan would have appreciated it.”
“Where is Ethan? We stopped by his house on the way in but no one was home.”
Marlene exchanged a look with Frank.
Nathan and Joe didn’t miss it.
“What’s going on, Mom?” Nathan asked.
And then for the first time he and Joe seemed to notice Rusty, who was sitting at the table looking very much as if she’d like to sink into the floor.
“Boys, I want you to meet Rusty. She’s staying here for a while.”
As Marlene had expected, they both scowled and immediately looked at their father. To his credit, Frank didn’t so much as flinch.
“Boys, say hello to Rusty,” he said in a gruff voice.
“Hello, Rusty,” Nathan said. Joe just nodded and then flashed a questioning look at his mother.
“Sit down, sit down,” she urged. “You’re just in time to eat. You’re probably starving.”
“It wouldn’t matter if we weren’t,” Joe said with a grin. “It’s been so long since we had home cooking that I’d eat even if I was about to bust a gut.”
Marlene managed to get them all herded to the table, and she dished up generous portions. She gave Rusty’s hand a reassuring pat as she passed her a plate. It was inevitable that she’d meet all the boys at some point. Better that it happened in stages than all at once. Marlene knew her boys were a handful, and even she was overwhelmed when they all got together.
“Now what’s the story with Ethan?” Joe asked after things had settled down a bit.
“He went to work with your brothers,” Frank said. “That’s all.”
Marlene pressed her lips together but didn’t say a word.
“Uh-huh, okay, what are you about to pop a blood vessel over there about, Mom?” Nathan asked.
She sighed and glared at her youngest child. Never could fool any of them any more than they could fool her.
“I don’t rightly know,” she admitted. “Just something’s off about the whole thing. Your father called Ethan on the morning of the sixteenth, and Ethan sounded horrible. The next thing we know, Sam, Donovan and Garrett are off on some classified mission. With Ethan.”
Joe frowned. “All of them?”
Frank’s brows drew together. “You know I didn’t even consider that. They never all go. Sam’s adamant about it.”
Marlene nodded vigorously. “You see, I’m not crazy. There is something going on. I don’t like it one bit.”
Joe turned to Nathan. “You said Van emailed you a few days ago. Did he say anything?”
Nathan shook his head. “Just the usual bullshitting.”
“Are you all a bunch of spies or something?” Rusty blurted out.
Joe and Nathan both jerked around like they’d forgotten she was there. Not difficult since she hadn’t uttered a peep the entire time.
The corner of Joe’s mouth turned up. “No, not spies. Military.”
Rusty looked suspiciously at him. “Military spies?”
Nathan laughed. “If we told you, then we’d have to kill you.”
Rusty rolled her eyes and went back to her food, muttering something under her breath.
“How long have they been gone?” Joe asked.
Frank’s brow creased in concentration for a moment. “Few days. They left about a week after the sixteenth.”
“Well, hell, they had to have been in the planning stages when Van emailed that they were doing absolutely nothing and that things were quiet.”
“They probably didn’t want to worry you,” Marlene said soothingly.
“That’s just it.” Nathan piped up. “They’ve never been worried about telling us shit before. Why would they start now, ironically when Ethan crawls out of his hole?”
“I don’t like it,” Joe muttered. “Sam’s number one rule is that all of them never go on the same mission.”
Marlene yanked her worried gaze to Frank.
He reached over and put his hand over hers. “Don’t worry, honey. You know our boys can handle themselves.” But she didn’t miss the uneasiness in his eyes.
She sighed and turned her attention to the boys she hadn’t seen in nearly a year. She wasn’t going to let worry over her other boys overshadow the twins’ homecoming.
“Eat,” she ordered. “I swear you’re both too thin. Doesn’t the army feed you?”
They both grinned at her. “Not nearly as well as you, Ma,” Nathan said.
“Oh, I’m so happy to see you both,” she said. “You are staying here since your brothers aren’t home, right?”
Joe raised his eyebrow in Rusty’s direction. “You have room?”
Marlene snorted. “Room? Do you forget all six of you boys grew up in this house? Rusty’s going to have to get used to the chaos sooner or later.”
She saw Nathan and Joe exchange pointed looks. They were staying quiet for now, but they’d ask plenty of questions later when Rusty was out of earshot.
“So tell me what’s been going on with you two,” Frank said. “I know you email every week, but it’s not the same as hearing it in your own words.”
“Our tour is up,” Joe said.
Marlene gasped. “Really? I thought you had three more months. Oh, that’s wonderful!”
“We pulled out ahead of schedule.”
“How long are you home for?” Frank asked.
“Ten days. Then we’ll be back at Fort Campbell,” Nathan said.
Marlene clapped her hands together. Tears pricked her eyelids. “That’s fantastic. It’ll be so nice to have you close to home again.”
“Let’s help your mother clear the table and then we’ll go into the living room and have a beer,” Frank said as he rose.
Nathan and Joe both cracked grins then stood and carried their plates over to the sink. Marlene watched them, her chest about to burst with pride. She felt that way about all her boys. It seemed over the last year that they had scattered to the winds, all going different directions. It just wasn’t the same after Rachel’s death.
Her heart gave a pinch, and she mentally scolded herself for allowing sadness to encroach on her time with Nathan and Joe. They were home, and she was going to enjoy every minute of it. And she was going to push her worries about her older boys right out of her mind.
Rusty stayed close to Marlene while Frank and the boys went into the living room. It didn’t take a genius to figure out how intimidated Rusty was by Nathan and Joe, but at least they’d largely ignored her. It wasn’t the most polite thing, but Marlene couldn’t blame them. And the alternative would have put Rusty over the edge.
“Come on, dear. You’ll have to face them all sometime.” She gestured for Rusty to follow her into the living room, where the TV was already on and, typically, the men were arguing over sports.
Nathan and Joe patted the space between them on the couch and promptly each put an arm around Marlene when she sat down. She was treated to a big sloppy kiss from both, and she beamed and patted their cheeks in return.
Rusty took a seat in the chair next to Frank’s recliner and attempted to blend in with the upholstery.
It was loud and chaotic, just the way Marlene liked it. She sighed in contentment and patted both boys on their legs. It didn’t matter that they were approaching thirty. They were still her babies.
The sound of the front door slamming made her sit up straighter. Frank heard it too, because he immediately hit the mute button on the remote.
“Mom, Dad? You home?”
“Sam,” Marlene breathed.
She looked up to see Sam stride into the living room, followed by Donovan. They were both a mess. Camo, boots, dirty torn shirts, and they looked like they hadn’t had a
bath in two days. They never came home like this.
A soft moan escaped her lips. Ethan and Garrett weren’t with them.
CHAPTER 14
SAM halted in the doorway of the living room, stunned to see his younger brothers sitting on the couch next to his mom.
“Nathan? Joe? What the hell are you guys doing home? Is something wrong?”
“That’s what we want to ask you,” Nathan said as he stood. Joe also stood, and the two men looked warily at their older brothers.
“Van,” Joe said with a nod in Donovan’s direction.
“What’s goingon?” Frankbarked. “You’re standinga round likea bunch of damn strangers and you’re scaring your mother to death.”
Donovan grinned hugely and strode across the room. He stopped in front of Nathan and then took him down in one swift motion. Nathan landed on the floor with a thump just as laughter burst from his chest.
“Goddamn it, Van, get off me.”
Joe wrapped his beefy arms around Donovan and lifted him clear off the ground. Donovan may have had the element of surprise when he got to Nathan, but being the smallest of the Kelly brothers put him at a major disadvantage.
Sam finally managed to shake off the shock of seeing Nathan and Joe. He held his hands up and barked an order for his brothers to quiet down.
Nathan and Joe looked up in surprise. His mom and dad looked at Sam with worried eyes.
Sam crossed the room and grabbed both his youngest brothers in a rough hug. “It’s damn good to have you both home.”
“Where’s Ethan and Garrett?” Joe asked in a steady voice as he pulled back.
It suddenly occurred to Sam what they all must have thought with him and Van bursting into the house looking like they’d both been rode hard and hung up wet and without their other two brothers.
He and Donovan exchanged quick glances.
“Tell me,” Marlene demanded.
Sam held his hands up in a soothing motion. “They’re fine, Mom. I promise.”
“Want to tell us what’s going on, son?” his dad said.
Donovan spoke up. “I think everyone should sit down. Ethan and Garrett are fine, but there’s something we need to tell you.”