“But—”
“Emma.” His voice is stern and low and it sends a strange tremble though my body. With a start, I realize he is using his Master voice on me. “Emma,” he repeats in that same tone. “Come out of the window. Right now, do you understand?”
The many nights of erotic play rise up in my mind and I feel my body reacting, obeying, even though my brain wants to refuse. My head is dizzy and my hands are shaking as I climb out the window and stand swaying on the ledge, looking down at my Master standing so far below.
“Master,” I whisper but somehow Aiden hears me.
“Now jump,” he commands, holding out his arms. “Trust me, Emma, I’ll catch you. I’ll always catch you.”
I don’t jump so much as fall. My fingers somehow peel themselves from the window pane and then, with a low cry, I’m flying free in the night with the ground rushing up to meet me. I close my eyes tight, not wanting to see, not wanting to know when I’m about to make impact…
Then two strong arms catch me and pull me close.
I put my arms around his neck and hold on tight. I’m crying and shaking and I feel him shaking too. Then suddenly he’s running. Running so fast the wind stings my eyes and I have to shelter my face in the crook of his neck. I have a confused impression of the raging fire receding in the distance and streets and houses streaming by at the speed of light. Then dark branches are whipping all around us. Up ahead, I see a house with glass walls, lit from within by a golden radiance. Unable to help myself, I think home.
Aiden doesn’t stop until he has me in the living room of his house and is sitting on a couch, still holding me. Only then does he speak.
“Darling.” He crushes me to him, burying his face in my hair. “Oh, Emma, I thought I’d lost you.”
I’m tempted to melt at his words but then I remember he said the exact same thing after we healed the binding spell and I fainted in front of the Vampire Council. And then he left me and never called once. I struggle against him, trying to sit up.
“Why are we here? Why did you bring me to your house?”
“I…” Aiden looks stricken. “Instinct, I suppose,” he says at last. “You were in danger. My first impulse was to bring you where I knew I could keep you safe. To bring you home.”
“Your home,” I whisper. “Not mine.”
“No.” He clears his throat. “Of course not.” Abruptly, he puts me down on the couch and moves back, putting some room between us. “Forgive me,” he says formally. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“You didn’t. I-I just…” Miserably I twist my fingers into knots, trying to think of what to say. How many times have I imagined this moment in my mind, since the last time I saw him? How many things have I planned to ask, to beg, to demand, to plead? And yet now they’re all gone and my head is empty. “How…how did you know I was in danger?” I ask at last.
Aiden looks at the carpet. “I felt it,” he says in a low voice. “I don’t have much of your blood left—I bled most of it out onto the Council Room floor. But there was just enough left to let me know you…you needed me.”
“Thank you for coming,” I say softly. “It was Sanchez. I set fire to him because he…he was going to…” My throat locks up and I can’t get the words out, can’t stop seeing those slotted yellow eyes as the satyr hissed his final threat.
“I know what he was going to do.” A muscle in the side of Aiden’s jaw clenches. “I should have killed him years ago.”
“Well, he’s dead now,” I say with a shiver, remembering the screaming, clawing lump of burning flesh the satyr became when the witch-flames engulfed him.
“I’m glad he won’t be bothering you anymore.” Aiden clears his throat. “As it happens, I won’t either.”
“What? What do you mean?” My heart is suddenly thumping so loudly I’m afraid Aiden might hear it. “Where are you going?”
“I’m going to ground again,” he says quietly, still looking away. “I’ve tried living in the human world and it doesn’t suit me. Not without…someone to share it with. And I’ve never liked the company of my own kind.” He clears his throat. “I was actually just about to enter my coffin for the final time tonight when I felt your distress. Now that I know you’re safe, I can go ahead with my plans.”
I feel numb all over. “So…I guess this is goodbye.”
“I guess so.” Aiden’s face is calm but his deep voice is hoarse. “I’m sorry for any pain I may have caused you, Emma,” he says formally. “I hope…hope in time you may find it in your heart to forgive me. If I ever come out into the light again, I promise to look after your descendants and make sure they’re happy and safe.”
“My descendants,” I whisper and I know he’s talking about sons and daughters I’ll have with some other man. The children who have nothing to do with him—with a vampire who’s nothing more than a footnote in my past. A distant memory of a love that never was.
Suddenly there’s a lump in my throat that I can’t swallow and my eyes are stinging. “Excuse me,” I whisper brokenly. “I…the restroom. I need to—”
“Of course,” Aiden says. “Help yourself.”
But I’m already rushing past him, the tears stinging my eyes and my heart caught in a vise. He’s going. He’s leaving me. Leaving forever and if it hadn’t been for Sanchez coming around to murder me in my bed tonight, he never would have even come to say goodbye. I’ve done the stupidest thing a girl can do—I’ve allowed myself to fall for a man who cares nothing for me. I’ve given my heart away and now I can’t get it back.
I run blindly through the mirrored maze of the house. Somehow I find myself not in the bathroom but in the study, surrounded by the rows of leather-bound books and facing the huge mahogany desk that dominates half the room. I sink down and lean my cheek against its cool surface for a moment, my shoulders shaking with silent sobs. Whatever I do, I can’t let him hear me. I don’t want him to know that he’s hurt me this badly, don’t want him to guess how desperately I love him…
If you love him, go and claim him.
The witch-whisper in my head startles me so much I nearly scream. I jerk my head up off the desk and look from side to side, trying to see who’s talking to me. There’s no one there, though. Just the ancient copy of Farrow’s Handbook of Spells and Summonings,lying open on the desk blotter.
“What?” I ask in a whisper. “Who said that?”
I did. The book jiggles a little. I, your ancestress, Katherine. Speak to me in your witch-whisper. I will hear you.
Katherine? I send back, my eyes wide with disbelief. Are you really still here?
Only a small part—a piece of my spirit I left tied to my spell book, she assures me. I wanted to be able to watch over my beloved Aiden even after I was gone. I knew, you see, that I would precede him in death. Truthfully, it was what I wanted.
Why are you talking to me now? I demand of her, still staring at the book. What do you want?
For you to do what I never could, she whispers. I want you to make Aiden happy.
Make him happy? I snort incredulously. How? He doesn’t care if I live or die—I don’t think it’s in my power to affect his happiness.
That’s not true and you know it. Katherine sounds stern, maybe even a little angry. Would he have come to your aid tonight if he didn’t care for you?
He was responding to the call of your blood, that’s all, I say dismissively. He never would have come otherwise.
My blood is long since gone from him, Katherine says quietly. It was yourblood that called to him, Emma. You that he wanted to save. You that he loves.
Yes, he saved me. Whoop-dee-do, I say angrily. And now he’s going to ground and he’ll never see me again. Is that the act of a man in love?
It is the act of a man who feels he has lost your love, she whispers quietly in my ear. The act of a man desperate to remove himself from the pain of that loss. He thinks you don’t want him anymore, Emma. And if you don’t speak up and let him know
otherwise, he’ll go to his coffin thinking that. And this time, I don’t think he’ll rise again. This time he will let go of his life essence and return to the ground.
The thought of Aiden giving up—letting himself die and decay—hits me like a ton of bricks, knocking the emotional wind out of me. I can barely hold back a sob. I want so much to believe her when she says that Aiden still loves me, that he is only going to ground because he thinks he’s lost me…but somehow I can’t do it. I just can’t.
Katherine seems to feel my disbelief. If you don’t believe me, test him yourself, she snaps.
How? I demand back. Short of going back out to the living room and declaring my desperate love—which I’m not going to do—I can’t think of any subtle way to let him know I care and see if he does too.
You know how, she tells me, the book’s pages rustling with quiet violence. Submit.
But…what…how…?
But the book is quiet and I sense my ancestress is gone. The little piece of her spirit she left behind to watch over Aiden’s happiness seems to feel it has done its duty. The ancient copy of Farrow’s is just a book now and I’m on my own.
At first I’m tempted to ignore her advice. After all, what does she know? What will I do if I try to submit to Aiden and he just ignores me? Or worse, politely puts me off?
What will you do if he goes back to ground? whispers a little voice in my head that I recognize as my own. If you never see him again? Are you really too much of a coward to even try? Which would be worse—his rejection or the knowledge that he might have loved you but you were too afraid and proud to try to find out?
I know the answer to that. I’d much rather risk rejection and know that I tried than wonder my whole life if Katherine’s spirit was right or not. But how exactly can I do this?
A gleaming spot of red on the desk catches my eye and gives me the start of an idea. It’s my collar—the one with the ruby pendant that Aiden took from me when he released me from his service. I could have sworn it wasn’t there a minute ago but now it is, lying beside the copy of Farrow’s and gleaming innocently in the soft lamplight.
Suddenly I know what I have to do. It may win me my Master back…or it may end in terrible rejection. But whichever outcome happens, at least I will know I have tried.
Taking a deep breath, I reach for the collar.
Chapter Twenty-Six
“Emma?” Aiden calls, just as I finish getting ready. “Are you all right?”
“I’m just fine…Master.” I can barely get the words out without stuttering but somehow I manage. “I’m here, in the study.”
“What are you doing in there?” I hear him ask. “Emma, what—” He stops short in the doorway, the words dying on his lips when he sees me.
I run my hand through my hair nervously, hoping he likes what he sees. I thought about keeping my nightgown on but it’s sooty and scorched and besides, he always said he liked to see me naked. So I have taken everything off but the collar, which I am wearing in hopes he’ll treat me as his submissive again and not some stranger. The AC kicks on and a cool air current flowing from the vent teases around my naked nipples and pussy, making me shiver.
For a long moment Aiden just looks at me, and I can’t tell what the hell he’s thinking. “Emma,” he says at last, sounding stern. “What do you think you’re doing?”
I give him a look of wide-eyed innocence. “Getting ready for my punishment, Master. I-I was very bad tonight. I almost didn’t jump when you told me to and—”
Aiden is across the room in a flash. Taking me by the shoulders, he shakes me roughly. “Do you think this is some kind of a game, Emma? Some twisted little scenario you can play out one more time before I go to ground?” he asks harshly.
“No!” I cry, dropping the innocent submissive routine. “This is no game—it’s my life. A life that included you until you decided to throw me away like a piece of trash you didn’t want any more.”
“A piece of trash?” he repeats hoarsely. “Is that really what you imagine I think of you?”
“What else am I supposed to think?” I snap, crossing my arms over my bare breasts protectively. Now I wish I wasn’t naked but it’s too late for regrets. “I thought maybe…maybe you didn’t like the way I look now,” I say, making a gesture that takes in my purple eyes and black hair.
“You’re beautiful, Emma, always beautiful to me,” he murmurs. “Although I must say, I’m very glad you kept your figure. It would have been a shame if you’d become as terribly skinny as your cousin.”
I try to laugh but it turns into a sob. “That’s…that’s the only part I don’t like,” I confess. “Why couldn’t the magic make me thinner while it was changing everything?”
“Maybe it knew I like you like this.” His gray eyes flicker over me, taking in my naked body in a way that makes my cheeks get hot.
“You have a strange way of showing you like me.” I raise my chin, trying not to show my embarrassment. “You left me and never once called, never came over to check on me.”
“Oh, darling…” He puts a hand to his eyes for a moment and shakes his head. “I’ve been doing nothing but checking on you. I’ve been coming around your cousin’s house night and day, staying out of sight, trying to make sure you were all right.”
“If that’s true then you must have seen how upset I’ve been,” I whisper. “You must have had some idea of how abandoned I felt. Why didn’t you come talk to me? Tell me you cared…if you do care at all, that is.”
“Of course I care,” he says fiercely. “I love you, Emma! But I thought…” He shakes his head. “Thought you’d hate me for not being able to save your mother. For not being able to stop what happened so long ago when you were only a child.”
“Why would I blame you for that?” I ask blankly. “I blame myself.”
“It’s not your fault,” he whispers, cupping my cheek.
“It’s not yours either,” I say in a choked voice. “And I could never hate you, Aiden. Never. I…I love you too.”
He pulls me close, crushing me to his chest and covering my mouth in a long, delicious kiss that takes my breath away. “Emma,” he whispers when he breaks the kiss at last. “Do you really mean that? Even now that you know the whole truth? My involvement in your past?”
“I wouldn’t say it otherwise,” I assure him. I put my arms around his neck, glad that even with my new height I still have to look up at him. “Are you still going to ground?” I ask softly. “Please, Aiden, say you’re not going to. If you leave me again I don’t know what I’ll do.”
“Of course I’ll stay here with you.” He strokes my cheek gently. “On one condition—that you form a life-bond with me.”
I frown. “But that will cut your lifespan in half.”
“And lengthen yours to match it,” he says firmly. “I’ll only stay in the light if I have you with me, darling. I have no interest in living any length of time without you.”
I know I should say no, should refuse to let him sacrifice centuries of his life for me but I can’t help myself. The idea that he wants to be with me so much, that he doesn’t want to live without me, fills me with joy so intense I can barely breathe. “Yes,” I whisper at last. “Yes, if…if you really want to.”
“I do.” His gray eyes shine, reflecting back my own happiness as he pulls me in to kiss me once more.
“What exactly does forming a life-bond involve?” I ask breathlessly, when he finally lets me go. “Is it some kind of ritual?”
“I’ll show you,” he murmurs. “Starting right now.”
“What? You want to do it this minute?” My heart is already speeding inside my chest at the hot way he is looking at me.
“Can you think of a better time?” he asks. “I almost lost you once, Emma. I don’t intend to risk it again. I love you and I want to tie you to me now. Right now.”
I hardly know what to say but he’s already kissing me. Running his big, warm hands all over my bare body, murmuring how
soft my skin is, how he loves my full breasts and hips. It’s making me so hot I can’t think straight. And then, before I know it, he has me seated on the edge of the desk and is kneeling between my legs.
“What…what are you doing?” I ask breathlessly although it’s pretty obvious.
“Getting you ready.” He looks up at me, his gray eyes blazing. “I need you open and ready to submit, darling.”
“I’m ready,” I assure him and indeed my pussy is already getting hot and wet though he hasn’t even kissed me yet.
“Not just ready for my kiss, darling. I need you to be ready for my bite.” He opens his mouth, showing the sharp white fangs that hurt so much when they pierced my wrist the night he first claimed me.
I bite my lip uncertainly. “Your bite?”
“In order to form a life-bond, we must exchange blood. If you were flowing right now I could taste you as I did the night I took your virginity,” he explains. “But as you aren’t, I will have to pierce your sweet flesh to get a taste of your blood.”
I look at those long white fangs again and then down to my tender, sensitive inner thighs. Goddess, this is so going to hurt.
“No, it’s not,” he murmurs, doing that mind reading trick he has. “It won’t hurt a bit, darling, if you can just let me in. Just submit to me completely as you did the night we healed the spell.”
I take a deep breath. “I…I’ll try,” I whisper. “It’s just…a little scary.”
“It doesn’t have to be,” he assures me. “I’ll be gentle, my darling. And I’ll give you pleasure first. You’ll barely feel it when my fangs slip in.”
“If you say so…” I sound doubtful, even to my own ears but Aiden doesn’t seem concerned by my lack of faith.
“Just watch,” he commands softly. “Watch me taste you, Emma. Watch me slide my tongue deep in your hot little cunt and taste your honey.”