I tilt my head to the side, scrunching my eyes up. “Good thing or bad thing?”
“The best thing.” His voice is deep with meaning.
My eyes catch his and hold. The air crackles between us, and I suddenly feel everything.
Blood beats in my ears, my pulse quickening.
Memories of him and me together…him inside me…are flashing through my mind, making me hot, making me needy.
Carrick looks away, breaking the moment. He clears his throat.
I need to say something to put us back where we were. I can’t spoil things with him again, not when I’ve just gotten him back.
“So, no more talk of money. I’m doing this because I want to.”
He turns his eyes to me. “If that’s what you want.”
“It is.” I smile lightly, curling my hands back around the wheel, as I exhale. “So, when do we start?”
“Now, if you want?” He opens his door and gets out of the car. “You can help me draw up a list of what we’ll need. I’ll order it, and then we’ll go from there.”
Climbing out of the car, I say, “Let’s get started.”
I’VE BEEN WORKING ON MY DAD’S CAR with Carrick nonstop for the past four days. I’ve hardly been home.
It’s been amazing, doing this with Carrick, restoring my dad’s car back to life.
Even though it’s been amazing, it’s been tough, too, and not just because I’m working on my dad’s car. Even though that has been emotional for me, I’ve kept those feelings buried. I’m just praying that I won’t burst into tears when I hear the engine running for the first time.
It’s also been tough to be around Carrick. I’m like a pot waiting to boil over. My hands are permanently itching to touch him, and the sexual tension building inside me is at the point that I’m sure I’m about to spontaneously combust from it.
But it’s not just the sexual tension that’s driving me insane.
It’s how I feel about him. That’s tearing me up the most.
Being with Carrick so intensely these last few days has brought everything to the forefront, everything I’ve been fighting to hide.
My feelings for him have grown. They’re more insistent and bigger, harder to ignore.
It was a little easier to pretend that I didn’t want him, that I wasn’t totally crazy about him, when we were traveling with the team or when he was angry at me or when we were dancing around each other, trying to build a bridge back to a friendship.
But this, being around him all the time in close proximity…it’s getting to the point of being unbearable.
And instead of being relieved that we’re almost coming to the end of working on my dad’s car—well, Carrick’s car—so that I can put that distance between us, I’m finding that I want to etch it out longer, so I can be around him—hence, the reason it’s taken me two and a half hours to fit the wiper motor.
Two and a half bloody hours to do a job that should have taken me one hour maximum.
I just…I don’t want this time to end. I want to be around him all the time.
I want him. I just wish I knew a way I could have him.
But all my wanting is fruitless. Carrick is past all of that now. He’s past me. I can tell…feel it in the way he is toward me. It shows in his body language. There are no more accidental touches. He keeps himself at a friendly distance from me.
Aside from that little moment in the car the other day, he has shown no indication of feeling the way he used to about me.
He’s affable, and we have our usual banter, but that feeling I always got from him, the one that told me he saw me through different eyes, is now gone.
I know he just sees me as a friend. I know that was what I wanted when I was telling myself that I needed him to stop wanting me, so I could stop wanting him. But now that he has, I hate it. It hurts like a bitch.
And now all I want is for him to see me the way he used to. Look at me the way he used to. I want him to want me like he did before…like I now want him. And it hurts beyond belief that he no longer does.
“How’s it coming?” Carrick’s voice comes from behind me.
It jolts me, stopping my thoughts and my humming along to the song playing on the radio.
I give another turn, tightening up the final screw. “Yeah, all done.”
Turning, I see him holding two coffees in his hands. I give him a smile of appreciation.
I put the screwdriver back in the toolbox and wipe my dirty hands on a rag. After tossing it on the workbench, I take the coffee from him. “Thanks.”
He leans back against the workbench. “So…we’re nearly done.”
My lips turn down at the corners, so I take a sip of my coffee, covering it. “Yeah, nearly done. Just need the starter motor, and we’ll be finished.”
“It’ll be delivered tomorrow. I know you’re back at work then…so I can fit it, if you want?”
“Oh, yeah? Okay, sure.” I try to hide my disappointment with a smile.
Carrick’s watching me. Dropping his gaze, he takes a sip of his coffee. Holding the cup against his chest, he says, “Will you come by tomorrow after you’re finished with work? I was going to wait to start her up. I thought we could take her out together.”
That brightens me up. “Sure. I’ll try to get out early, and I’ll come straight here.”
“Cool.” He smiles at me and takes another sip of his coffee.
The air feels strained between us, and I’m not really sure why. Maybe I am causing it because I’m feeling sad at the thought of my time here with him coming to an end.
I’ve just taken another sip of coffee when David Guetta’s “Dangerous” starts to play out of the speakers.
This song was playing in the garage the first time I met Carrick.
I feel a sudden energy in the room. Like pure electricity.
I lift my eyes to Carrick and find he’s already staring at me. There’s something deep and intense in his eyes, and it’s making my stomach flip and my knees weaken.
“This song…it was playing the first time we met.” His voice is low with meaning.
And it’s like he just read my mind.
I can’t believe he remembers.
“You…remember?” My words come out in a breathy whisper.
“I remember everything.”
Drawing a breath, I lower my eyes.
I feel like I’m being blasted with every single feeling I have for him. The feelings I’ve had since the moment I turned my head and saw him standing there in the garage at Rybell. The feelings that have kept on growing ever since.
Growing and changing into something so big that I can no longer see past them.
All I can see now is him.
I lift my eyes, and I’m met with Carrick’s. The look there nearly brings me to my knees.
I start to tremble, right down to my bones.
Wordlessly, he puts his coffee down and slowly walks toward me, not moving his eyes from mine.
I’m paralyzed. And even if I weren’t, I wouldn’t move. I need him close to me right now more than I need air.
Taking the cup from my hand, he places it on the side. Then, lifting a hand, he brushes a stray hair from my face.
I suck in a breath. My body triggers to life under his touch.
“What are you doing?” My voice trembles.
“Taking what I want…what’s mine.”
He cups my face with his hand, running the tip of his thumb over my lower lip, sending a shiver hurtling through me.
“I can’t do this anymore, Andressa. I thought I could handle just being your friend, but I can’t. I’m tired of pretending, pretending that I don’t feel what I feel for you. I want you, and it’s not going away. And I know you feel the same. I can see it in your eyes…feel it in your body.” He runs his hand down the curve of my waist. “I’m sick of ignoring the inevitable.”
He presses a gentle kiss to the corner of my lips, and I gasp.
“You’re mine.
You’ve been mine from the moment I saw you. And I’m definitely yours. So, I’m here, telling you that I want you today and every day after. I’m so beyond fucking crazy about you that I’m going insane from not being with you. So, whatever it is that’s stopping you from being with me, like we both know you want, then just fight it, babe, because I can’t be without you a moment longer.”
“I…” My mind is whirling, my mouth dry. My body and heart are screaming for him, but my logic is trying to fight this.
But his words are penetrating my already crumbling wall. The way I feel about him is never going to go away, no matter how hard I fight it.
Then, it just suddenly seems so easy.
I have to try this with him. If I don’t, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.
Staring into his eyes, I press my palm to his chest. I love the way his eyes close on the feel of me touching him. The beat of his heart so hard against my hand.
“I do want you,” I whisper.
He opens his eyes and I see something deep move within them. “You want to fuck me? Or you want to be with me? Because I can’t do one without the other. I can’t keep fucking you and then losing you, Andressa. I need you. All of you.”
“I need you, too. I don’t want to keep running anymore.” It’s only then that I realize that I’m crying.
With emotion, Carrick watches the tear as it rolls down my cheek. He sweeps it away with his thumb.
I can feel his body trembling beneath my hand.
And it’s in this moment that I understand just how deeply he feels for me, and I want him to know that I feel the same.
“I’m crazy about you,” I whisper. “I want to be with you…all of you…if you’ll have me?”
My words have some effect on him.
The next thing I know, he’s kissing me and telling me, “God, you’re all I fucking want. All I’ve ever wanted.”
I fall into his kiss, pressing my body to his, wrapping my arms around his neck. He holds me tight, devouring my mouth, like he never wants to let me go.
And I don’t ever want to let him go, but there are things I need to tell him…my fears, why I am the way I am. I need to tell him about my dad, so he knows fully what he’s getting into with me.
“Carrick, wait…” I pant over his lips. “Before we do this, there are some things I need to tell you—”
“No,” he growls against my mouth, halting my words. “No more talking. We can talk later, but right now, I just need to be inside you. That can’t wait.”
Like I’m going to argue with that.
“Okay,” I whisper. “Okay.”
Then, we’re kissing each other, hard and desperate, like two people starved.
I guess we have been starved of each other.
Carrick starts pulling at my clothes, unzipping the rest of my overalls with just barely there impatience. Shoving them down my legs, I toe my shoes off and kick the overalls off, leaving me in jean shorts and my tank top.
I tear at Carrick’s clothes with the same ferocity, pulling his overalls off. He kicks his shoes off and then yanks the overalls off his legs with an impatience that makes me smile.
My hands go to his jeans. At the exact same time, his hands go to my shorts, unbuttoning them, and then they’re gone, whipped down my legs. All the time, we’re both desperately kissing one another—mouths, cheeks, necks, shoulders, anywhere we can.
Then, he lifts me, turning with me, and puts me down on the workbench. He pulls my tank over my head. Cupping my breast over my bra, he brushes his thumbs over my already hard nipples, and I gasp.
“You’re wet for me, Andressa?”
Biting my lip, I stare into his eyes. “Yes.”
Reaching behind me, he unclasps my bra. Removing it, he tosses it to the floor. Cupping my breasts in his hands, squeezing, he dips his head, taking a nipple in his mouth.
“Yes.” My head falls back on a desperate, urgent whimper.
My hands go to his head, holding him to me, as he starts to lick and suck my nipple, gently kneading the other breast with his hand.
Then, he’s kissing his way up my chest, back to my mouth. He grabs a handful of my hair and starts to kiss me hard. There’s an almost angry urge to the way he’s taking my mouth.
And it’s a huge turn-on, knowing how desperate he is for me.
After biting my lower lip, he licks the sting away. Hands grabbing my behind, fingers digging into my skin, he yanks me up against him, his erection pressing into me, making me even more desperate for him.
“I need to fuck you now, and it’s gonna be a hard ride, babe, because I’ve gone way too long without you. But right after, I’m gonna take you up to my bed, and then I’ll take my time with you. That okay?”
Um…like I’m going to say no.
Sliding a hand between us, I grab hold of his cock through his boxers, giving him a firm squeeze. “Fuck me now. I want you—hard.”
His eyes ignite like a match has just been struck behind them. He yanks off his T-shirt. Then, hooking his fingers into the waistband of his boxers, he pushes them down over his hips, letting them drop to the floor.
My eyes greedily go to his cock. I bite my lip in anticipation.
“Keep looking at me like that, and this’ll be over in seconds.”
Grinning, I lift my eyes to his face. “I don’t care how long we have. I just care that you’re inside me, preferably in the next three seconds.”
He whips my knickers off. Then, he’s back between my legs, his cock pressed up against my wetness.
“Jesus, you feel so fucking good,” he growls, taking my mouth again.
The kiss starts out tender, but we’re both so desperate to have one another that it’s soon back to bruising.
My fingers are digging in his bum cheeks, trying to bring him impossibly closer. Carrick has one hand on my breast, the other making its way down south. His thumb presses on my clit as he pushes his finger inside me, and he pinches my nipple with his other hand.
A charge so strong fires through me that I think I might come right then.
“God! I need you inside me!” I cry out.
Features taut with need, he draws his finger out of me. Then, I see something flicker over his face that looks a lot like dawning. “Fuck!” he bites out.
“I’d quite like to.”
He looks at me, and I grin.
Touching a hand to my face, he says, “I haven’t got a condom in here. They’re in my wallet, which is in the house, on the kitchen counter.”
Oh.
He stares at me for a beat. “Do you…want me to go get it?”
I know what he’s asking. And what I do know is that I don’t want him to leave right now. Not even for a second. We could go to his house together and get a condom, but I don’t want to wait. I want him inside me now.
Maybe I’m being reckless, but I don’t care.
“Do you want to go get it?” I ask softly.
Something possessive enters his gaze. Holding my stare, he shakes his head. “I just want to be inside you.”
“I’m on the pill,” I say softly.
He slides a hand up into my hair. Pulling the tie out, he slips his fingers into my hair. “I’m clean, babe. I’ve been checked, and there’s been no one but you since the last time we had sex.”
I flush hot at the reminder of him taking me up against that door in the hotel stairwell.
“Me either. There’s been no one but you.”
Taking my hand, he presses it against his chest. “Babe, all that stuff in the past, the mistakes I made—”
“Don’t…” My eyes lower from his, my mind going to things I don’t want to think of.
He takes my face in his hands, forcing my eyes to his. “It was always you. From the moment I saw you, it was you, Andressa.”
“Take me,” I whisper. “Make me yours.”
Moving a hand from my face, he takes his cock in hand and rubs it against my entrance.
My body star
ts to beg for him, my hips undulating.
He slowly starts to push in, and I gasp from the hot bare feel of him and from the dark and possessive look in his eyes.
I watch, rapt, as his face tightens, his jaw clenching, while he pushes all the way inside me.
“Andressa…Jesus, you feel phenomenal.” His hips press against mine, and he takes my face in his hands again. “You’re mine, babe, and you’re always going to be.”
“Yes,” I breathe.
He kisses me passionately, deeply.
I hook my legs around his hips, digging my fingernails into his tight behind, urging him to move, and he obliges.
Carrick fucks me there on his workbench, hard and desperate. Clinging to one another, devouring each other’s bodies, we take what we need.
And it’s not long before I’m coming, blowing apart.
“Fuck…” he groans before biting down hard on my shoulder. “Fuck, babe, I’m coming.”
I feel his cock start to jerk inside me as he comes, coating my insides with his release.
Wow. Hot sex in a garage with Carrick.
We definitely have to do that again—and soon.
His head is on my shoulder, his breathing heavy. I run my hands up his back and into his hair.
He lifts his head, and I see the flicker of unease in his eyes.
I know what he’s thinking. He’s worried that I’m going to leave again. It makes me hate myself for doing that to him those times before.
Gripping his strands, I bring his head to mine, and I kiss him hard, desperate. I pour everything I feel for him into it this kiss, holding on to him like my life depends on it. Because in a way, it does.
“I’m yours, Carrick,” I whisper against his lips. “I’m yours, and I’m staying, if you want me to.”
Tilting his head back, he stares at me. “You’re not going anywhere because I’m nowhere near done with you, and I don’t think I ever will be.”
His words rock me to the core.
Hands on my behind, he lifts me off the workbench and starts moving across the garage, his cock still safely nestled inside me.
“Where are you taking me?”
“Shower and then bed, so I can fuck you again. And this time, I’m going to savor you, take my time.”