It felt as if someone were sitting on my chest, I answered her honestly, “I’m not sure.”
She rolled her eyes, pushed the door open, and got out of the BMW we had rented. Slamming the door shut, she immediately began bitching about having to walk on gravel in her high heel shoes. Why in the hell she had packed high heel shoes when she thought we were going camping was completely lost on me.
“Want me to carry you, Daphne?”
Daphne nodded her head and then laughed as I picked her up and carried her to the entrance. Stopping at the door, I slowly slid her down and gave her a kiss. Trying hard to make her happy. If she was miserable, I’d be miserable. “We wouldn’t want you to ruin those heels now would we?” I said as I gave her a wink. It was rare that we were like this. Most of the time Daphne wanted to be left alone and I was more than happy to oblige.
“Gag me. Can we move along, Holden? Some of us would like to get in and get a beer.”
Turning, I saw Becca standing there with Emylie and Mason behind her. My stare immediately zeroed in on Emylie. “Nice to see you too, Becca. I see you’re still the same spunky girl.”
She pushed past me while shooting me the finger as she mumbled, “Asshole.”
Daphne’s mouth fell open as she said, “Well, I’ve never. Holden, are you going to let her talk to you like that?”
Becca turned and observed Daphne. “Nice Louboutin’s. Probably not the best place to wear them though.”
Taking a step up, Emylie cleared her throat. “Becca, why don’t we head on in?”
Becca gave Daphne a fake smile before turning and heading into the dance hall. Emylie peeked up at me through her lashes and I was almost positive she sucked in a breath. I knew she had seen my face where Mason had punched me. Looking away quickly, she and Mason made their way inside. His hand on her lower back, guiding her in.
Fucker.
I wrapped my arm around Daphne’s waist, we headed inside. Smiling the minute I stepped inside, all the memories came flooding back to me.
“Damn, I had some fun times in this place,” I said as I scanned the dance floor.
Daphne held onto me like we were walking down a shady alley in LA. She barely whispered, “This is what the country people do for fun, huh?”
I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and chuckled. “Come on, Daphne, try and enjoy yourself. I can even teach you how to two-step if you want.”
She lifted her hand and brushed me off while she checked her phone for messages. “I think I’ll pass. I’ll give you tonight to stroll down memory lane. But after this, I expect you to be back to your normal self, Holden.”
I shook my head while my jaw clenched together. “Daphne, I’m not asking you to move here for fuck’s sake. I’m asking you to at least try to enjoy this week. This is my family … these are my roots, and if you can’t accept me for where I came from, we have a serious problem.”
Daphne stood before me with a stunned expression before she squared off her shoulders. “I’m sorry, Holden. You’re right. This is all very … new to me. I’m sure I’m just tired from the travel and thinking we were actually going—”
“Going where?”
Daphne glanced around and gave a weak smile to my parents as they walked in. “Fine, Holden, I’ll tell you. I thought you were taking me to Mexico. Private beach, white sands, the whole romantic notion of you sweeping me away after you proposed to me is what I had in mind. Not being swept away to your family’s ranch in the middle of nowhere. The stress of all of this is not good for me or the baby.”
I pulled my head back in surprise as I asked, “Isn’t that after the wedding day?”
She shot me a dirty look and replied, “I need a drink, Holden. The sooner, the better. And a table please. I’d like to get off my feet.”
After finding a table and ordering Daphne a Coke, I excused myself and headed to my parents’ table. My father was in a deep conversation with Mario, Emylie’s father. Clearing my throat, I began to speak. “Mr. Sanchez, it’s a pleasure to see you again.”
Barely acknowledging me, Emylie’s dad answered, “It’s been a while, Holden.”
I knew I didn’t deserve much more than that. “Dad, are you enjoying the evening?”
My father glanced up at me. Disappointment filled his eyes as I felt my stomach drop. “It’s fine. Your mother was looking for you and Daphne. She wanted y’all to sit with us.”
I quickly scanned the area and saw my mother out on the dance floor with Mason. The way she was laughing caused a tinge of jealousy to race through my blood. “That was nice of her, but Daphne has a bit of jet lag and wanted to sit away from the music.”
My father glanced over to Daphne who had her nose stuck in her phone. “That three-hour flight must have been hell on her.”
I shook my head. “Dad, are we really going to do this right now?”
My father stood up quickly and got in my face. “I am, Holden, because you never had the balls to come home and do your dirty work in person. You come walking back into town with some fancy fiancée and you expect us all to fall at your feet with welcome arms. Well I’m sorry, son, my world doesn’t work that way.”
Feeling the anger build up, I slowly let out a breath as I replied, “So you’re going to fault me for falling in love, Dad?”
He threw his head back and laughed. He glanced over to Mario and then back to me. “I call bullshit. If you love that girl, then God strike me down. Now, you had yourself a little fun, found a pretty girl who gave you some attention. Something new and different, isn’t that what you said you wanted? But in the meantime know this, you hurt Emylie deeper than you’ll ever know, and that is not the man I raised. You disappoint me in more ways than one.”
“Lord knows we can’t have you disappointed now, Dad, can we? And if you don’t think I know how much I hurt her, then you are sorely mistaken. I’d give anything to go back and not che—.” I instantly stopped talking.
My father glared at me. Slowly shaking his head, he said, “I thought so.”
My mother stepped between the two of us and placed her hand on my shoulder. “Stop this right now. If you two want to work through your problems, that’s fine, but do it in private.”
Nodding, I gave my mother a knowing look. “Sorry, Mom. I’m going to head back over to Daphne.”
“That’s fine. Come on over and sit with us, okay?”
Not wanting to disappoint my mother, I nodded and said, “Okay, let me go get her.”
My mother smiled and reached up to kiss me on the cheek.
As I headed back to where Daphne was, I saw Emylie and Mason dancing. Jealousy raced through my body for the second time tonight. Mason had my life. The life I openly walked away from.
Pulling my gaze from the past, I made my way to my future while I tried to shake the dreadfulness that swept over my body.
My father was right. He was absolutely right. I not only disappointed him, but my mother, Emylie, Mason, Kim, and Mario.
And most of all … me.
Ten Bud Lights and a few hours later, I was laughing and having a good time with Mason and a few guys I went to high school with. Daphne was sitting at my parents’ table bored out of her damn mind. I’d tried over a dozen times to get her to dance with me, and each time she turned me down. I finally said fuck it and decided to enjoy myself. If she wanted to sulk, let her. I didn’t really give two shits.
Mason and Tyler, a hunting guide who worked for my father, began talking about the upcoming season. I tried like hell to not pay attention to what they were talking about, but I was longing to add my input. Input I knew they neither needed nor wanted.
Mason glanced over my shoulder and smiled. Standing, he said, “If y’all will excuse me, a pretty girl is motioning for me to dance with her.”
I glanced over my shoulder and saw Emylie. I had figured it was going to be Becca since Mason and Becca had pretty much been dancing together all night. Turning back to him, I acted as if I couldn’t have cared
less. I observed him as he walked up to Emylie and whispered something into her ear. She pulled back and smiled at him. Becca walked up and motioned for Mason to dance with Emylie.
The music changed and Emylie raised her brows as she led Mason to the dance floor.
Turning away, I asked Tyler. “How long have Mason and Emylie been together?”
Tyler frowned and shrugged his shoulders. “They’ve been keeping it on the down-low, but I think they’ve been together for at least a year. Heard a rumor they were together while at A&M. Something about Emylie had a bad breakup and then Mason walked in on his girl fucking some other guy. Since then, they’ve been rumored to be fuck buddies.”
My blood began to boil at the idea of Mason with my Emylie. That motherfucker. Turning back to him, I fought the urge to bash his head into the floor.
“Fuck buddies, huh?” I asked as I turned back to Tyler.
Tyler took a drink of his beer. “That’s the rumor. Shame, though. They both really deserve to be happy.”
I gave Tyler a fake smile, I took another drink of my beer. “Sure they do.”
Standing up, I pushed my chair back. “I feel like dancing,” I mumbled as I made my way to the dance floor. Knowing how drunk I was, this was probably not one of my better ideas.
Luke Bryan’s “Kick the Dust Up” played as I walked up to Mason and Emylie. Tapping on Mason’s shoulder, I asked, “May I cut in?”
Mason took a step back and motioned to Emylie. “It’s up to, Em.”
I let out a gruff laugh and said, “You like calling her my nickname?”
Mason pulled his head back in shock. “What the hell are you talking about, Holden? We’ve always called her Em.”
Pointing to myself, I said, “Nah, dude. That’s what I called her. I guess it makes sense you would step into the role for me. I appreciate that, buddy. That’s what best friends do. Take over fucking the girl, right?”
Mason’s face turned red as Emylie stepped between us. “You’re drunk, Holden. Why don’t you go on back to your table? I’m sure Daphne is waiting for you.”
“You don’t want to dance with me, Emylie? Why?”
Examining me with a surprised expression, she slowly shook her head. “Holden, you have no right asking me to dance.”
“Why not? I thought we were friends.”
Mason reached for Emylie. “Come on, Em, I’ll take you home.”
I took a step toward Mason and poked him in the chest. “Oh hell. Whoa there, Mason. Dude, you really going to take her home right in front of me? Hell, why don’t you just fuck her in front of me while you’re at it?”
“Holden!” Emylie called out. Then she screamed. That was twice Mason had caught me off guard. This time he clocked me right in the eye.
Grabbing me by the shirt, Mason pulled me up to him. “You never were a good drunk, you asshole. Go home, Holden. You have a new life now. Remember? You can’t come back and ruin Emylie’s again.”
My father walked up and pulled Mason’s hands off of me. “All right, boys. That’s enough. Let’s go home, Holden.”
As my father began to drag me away, my gaze caught Emylie’s. She seemed so sad. “Em, I never wanted to hurt you. I swear to you! Baby, I still love you!”
Her eyes widened in shock. She turned away from me and walked right into Mason’s arms as my father pulled me outside and over to his truck. Pushing me up against it, he glared at me.
“What in the hell is wrong with you, Holden?”
I let out a moan while I dragged my hands down my face. “Fuck, Dad. I don’t know. I lost control when I saw Mason and Emylie together, and I know I have no right to be feeling the way I’m feeling.”
“You think? You made a choice, Holden. For whatever reasons you had to walk away from this life, you did. Now you live with that decision. You’ve got five days here, and I swear to God, son, you better make it up to your mother for being gone the last few years. As far as Emylie goes, you made your bed. Lie in it.”
I peered up at my father, my eyes wet with the threat of tears. “I don’t love her. Dad, it was one moment of weakness.”
Tilting his head, my father stared into my eyes like he knew exactly how I was feeling. His gaze moved behind me as he leaned in closer and whispered, “That one moment of weakness better have been worth it, son.”
He opened the door and pushed me inside. “He’s pretty drunk, darling. Why don’t you follow us back to the ranch in the car y’all rented?”
“Is he okay, Mr. Warner?” Daphne asked.
“Sam, call me Sam, Daphne. Yes, he never could hold his beer. Debbie, why don’t you drive home with Daphne so she doesn’t get lost.”
I tried to push everything away. The way Mason and Emylie danced together. The sadness that filled her eyes when she gazed into mine.
My head dropped back against the seat while I let out a groan. Where did it all go wrong?
I already knew the answer.
The moment I met Daphne.
TWO DAYS HAD passed since the encounter with Holden at Twin Oaks. Mason had brought me home, walked me to my door, and wished me a goodnight. I hated that he and Becca didn’t end up together that night. I knew it was because of me.
I mindlessly rode along the fence line. It wasn’t a part of my job description to check the fences, but I needed to do something that took me away from the main house. My office was housed there and I couldn’t bare the idea of running into Holden … or Daphne. From the little I knew about her, she was vile and snobby. I didn’t trust her. There was something about her that didn’t feel right. I couldn’t put my finger on it, and a part of me wanted to figure it out. The other part of me wanted them both to leave and get on with their happy lives in LA.
Closing my eyes, I thought back to this morning when I had overheard her on the phone.
“No, Jean, I’m not in Mexico on a white sandy beach. I’m stuck in the middle of Texas, where it’s hot as hell and my hair will not hold a damn curl.”
Daphne had wandered to the other end of the house where my, Mason’s, and Sam’s offices were located. My office door had been cracked open and I couldn’t help but overhear her talking to a friend.
“Well, the plus side to all of this is I think Holden’s mom is going to be throwing us an engagement party. I’ve already informed Daddy and he’s sending someone to document it. Oh, yes, I’ve already cleared it with Holden. I think he needed to sow some wild oats. Once we get back to LA, he’ll be back to his normal self. Right now he’s wearing Wranglers and a God-awful baseball cap backward. I will admit he looks hot as hell in it, but it’s not the Holden I’ve worked so hard at grooming.”
I rolled my eyes as I stood up and headed to my door. Before closing it, Daphne started laughing. “Oh, girl, sex with Holden has never been one of my complaints. No, unfortunately we haven’t. I think he’s worried about being in his parents’ home. He won’t be able to last too much longer without sex. He mentioned something about going to some cabin. He never could resist me.”
My hand covered my mouth as I tried to keep the sick feeling down. The cabin is the first place Holden and I had made love. He was taking her there? How could he?
Pulling my office door open, I quickly walked down the hallway as Daphne let out a small scream. I needed to get out of this house.
I needed air.
I took in a deep breath and stared straight ahead as I tried to clear my mind of Daphne and Holden. Someone was on a horse up ahead in an open field. Pulling out my phone, I called Mason.
“Hey, Em. What’s up?”
“Hey, are you out in the north pasture?” I asked as I kicked my horse into a trot.
“Nope, I’m living in hell right now listening to Sam and Tyler argue about something Holden mentioned.”
With my curiosity piqued, I asked, “What did he mention?”
“A solar-powered system for the windmills.” Mason covered the phone and shouted something about the men growing up.
Letting out
a chuckle, I said, “You know, that’s not a bad idea, Mason.”
He responded with a sigh. “I know, but the idea came from Holden, so you know how that goes.”
“Yeah. I know how that goes. His dad won’t even entertain it. I’m going to see who in the hell is out here.”
“It’s probably one of the guides exercising some of the horses. Debbie mentioned wanting to take some of the kids on a guided horseback ride.”
“Okay, that’s probably it. Talk to you soon.”
Hearing Sam raising his voice in the background, I smiled as Mason groaned. “Later, Em.”
I slipped my phone back into my boot and gave Sunshine a squeeze and she took off in a full run. It didn’t take me long to come up on the person. My heart began beating harder in my chest, the closer I got. Even out in the wide open, I knew it was him. I could feel it was him.
Turning his horse around, Holden stood before me looking like he did the last time we were in this field together. Bringing my horse to a stop, I fought to find my voice. Holden smiled and lifted his hand in a wave. “Hey, Emylie.”
I finally spoke. “Hey. Sorry, I wasn’t sure who was out here. I didn’t mean to interrupt you and …” Glancing around I searched for Daphne.
“Um … where’s Daphne?”
Holden shook his head and let out a loud laugh. “Daphne would rather roll around in pig shit before getting up on a horse.”
With my lips pursed, I lifted my brow. “I don’t see her as the type of girl to do either to be honest with you.”
Turning his head away from me, he looked out over the pasture. “Yeah, she’s not. She’s more into shopping, photo shoots, and her acting career.”
“Acting, huh?”
Holden turned back to me and smiled weakly. “Yeah. She’s good at acting.”
Not knowing what to say, I gave him a weak smile in return and lifted my hand to say goodbye. I couldn’t stop hearing his voice replay in my head as Sam dragged him away. Shouting he still loved me. It had replayed over and over in my head the last two nights.