Page 42

With Every Heartbeat Page 42

by Linda Kage


Tears slid down my own cheeks. My chest felt like it was on fire. Caroline murmured a few words to soothe her, and Zoey settled, but I didn’t. I choked out a sob and glanced at Noel and Ten on either side of me.

Ten had been strong enough to stay away from Caroline even though he wanted her. He knew he was no good for her, just like I was no good for Zoey. With Cora being her sister, my past with my first girlfriend would always be there, between us. I didn’t need to put that kind of drama in Zoey’s life. I had caused this to happen to her.

But no matter how much I commanded myself to walk away and leave her in peace, I couldn’t do it. Zoey had taught me what true love really was, and no way could I abandon that. Maybe I could get her to forgive me.

I went to her and crawled onto Caroline’s bed to pull her into my arms.

Caroline sent me a tired, grateful smile and got off the bed to go give Noel a hug. Then all three of them moved out of the doorway.

Zoey stirred against me, burrowing into me and settling her ear against my heartbeat. “Quinn,” she murmured sleepily.

I kissed her hair and stroked her back. “I’m here.”

“Love you,” she mumbled sleepily. I don’t know if she was still too asleep to know what she was saying or if she honestly knew she was talking to me. But the words moved through me anyway.

“I love you too. With every beat of my heart, I am yours, Zoey Alaina Blakeland. And I’m so sorry for everything.”

Her eyes fluttered open before she looked up at me. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for.”

“Yes, I do. I walked away tonight when I shouldn’t have. I walked away without realizing something awful had happened to you.”

“Did you beat up Belcher?” she asked.

I brushed my fingers delicately over the bruise on her cheek. “Yeah. Does that bother you?”

She shook her head. “No. I…I’m glad. Thank you. I don’t…I don’t like that guy.”

I grinned and pressed my forehead to hers. “Neither do I.”

“Is he going to be in a lot of pain for a while?”

“Yeah,” I repeated. “He is.”

She lifted her hand to my cheek. “Thank you.”

I closed my eyes and breathed in her amazing smell. “Does this mean you’ll take me back?”

“If you still want me.”

I touched my lips to hers softly. “I’ve always wanted you, and I always will.”

I woke alone in Quinn’s bed. The scent of him wafted up from his pillows and sheets and made me smile.

I’d almost been asleep in his arms on Caroline’s bed last night when from somewhere Ten’s voice said, “Well, pick her up and bring her with us, already. I’m tired as shit. Let’s go home.”

Quinn had sounded amused when his answer rumbled through his chest and into my ear. “You’re not going to balk about her staying at our apartment?”

In return, Ten had sounded confused and a little insulted. “Why would I balk? She’s your first real girlfriend. That’d be a pretty shitty, asshole move on my part to bar your woman from our place.”

Quinn had merely laughed before he scooped me up. I closed my eyes, wrapped my arms around his neck, and burrowed in.

And now, here I was, where he’d deposited me on his mattress before he’d crawled under the covers with me and held me all night long.

I stretched and glanced around, not really wanting to move, but wanting to find Quinn more than I wanted to stay still. I sat up and pushed the covers off my lap before patting Quinn’s shirt I wore to sleep in down enough to cover the tops of my thighs. As soon as I went to stand, the bedroom door cracked open. Quinn peeked inside.

“Hi,” I said, glowing from the inside out.

He stepped into the room, carrying a glass of juice. “Hey. You’re awake.”

When I nodded, he brought the cup to me. “Here. I brought you something to drink. Ten said he’d take care of breakfast.”

I paused halfway through my first gulp to look up in surprise. “Ten cooks?”

Quinn’s dimple appeared as he grinned at me. “No. But he buys. He’ll be back with donuts.”

“Oh.” I drained the rest of my glass before setting it on the nightstand. “Donuts sound good.” My hands went to my lap as I eyed him. Knowing how much we had to discuss, I was suddenly uncertain of where to start. “So…”

He sat beside me and set his hand on my bare knee. “How’re you doing?” His voice moved through me, a prayer and thanksgiving.

I looked up at him. The concern in his eyes made me ache.

I shook my head. “I don’t know,” I answered honestly.

His lips twitched with amusement. “Yeah. I think I’m about the same.”

He was driving me crazy, being so polite. I needed to know just how much he must still be mad about.

“Are you upset that I never told you?” I burst out, only to bite the corner of my lip. “About Cora, I mean.”

He blew out a shaky breath and grazed his hand over my knee before he ran his fingers up my thigh, where he grasped my hands from my lap and gripped them snuggly.

His voice was soft, without a hint of malice when he murmured, “What was it you once said to me: It wasn’t your secret to tell?”

I frowned and shook my head. “But this...this affected us. You and me. You wouldn’t have ever dumped her that night if you’d just known she was sick, would you?”

His amazing blue eyes held apology when they met mine. “I don’t know. Probably not. Then again, my feelings for you were pretty strong. I honestly don’t know how long I could have kept denying them and stayed with her. Stayed away from you.”

With a nod, I bolstered my shoulders wider. It felt good to hear him say that, but... “You would’ve denied them forever,” I said with complete assurance. “Because you’re just that kind of guy. Being a good, honorable man is worth more to you than your own happiness.” I sent him a smile to help him know I respected that about him. “We never would’ve gotten together if I’d have just told you the truth a long time ago.”

He didn’t return my smile. Instead, he seemed to deflate. “Are you asking if I regret us?”

“No.” I immediately shook my head, but then I squeezed my eyes shut and lowered my face. “I don’t know. I don’t think I could handle your answer if I asked that.”

He moved closer. I felt the heat from his body soak into me, and the warmth of his breath as he lowered his face to talk into my ear. Then I heard him loud and clear when he whispered, “I don’t. I don’t regret being with you at all.” He kissed my forehead gently.

Well, I had been right. I couldn’t handle his answer, even though it was the one I wanted to hear. Guilt, and longing, and love tore through me. I curled my shoulders in and immediately started to cry.

“But I’m her sister. Her sister.” I still couldn’t believe that part.

Quinn’s strong arms enveloped me, and he crushed me to his chest. “I don’t care.” His palm cupped my face and he led me to him, where I rested my chest over his heartbeat and listened to the rhythmic lub-dub inside him as silent tears streamed down my face.

I wrapped my arms around his waist and grabbed handfuls of the back of his shirt as he cradled me and let me cry all over him. He was warm and familiar. I selfishly gobbled up the moment, inhaling his spicy scent, memorizing the cadence of his heart, soaking in as much of his heat as I could steal. I loved hugging this man.

He threaded his fingers through my hair and shifted stray strands out of my face. “Better yet?”

I nodded against him, unwilling to break contact just yet. “Yes. Thank you.” I looked up and smiled through wet lashes, knowing I didn’t deserve such affection from him.

But he just kept on giving it, regardless.

“I have something for you.” He shifted, and I watched him lean off the side of the bed to pick up something from the floor. When he pulled up a familiar, tattered old notebook, my mouth fell open.


“How...?”

“It’s the one I borrowed from you, remember?” He handed me the only few short stories I had left in one thin notebook.

I took it reverently.

He sent me a sad smile. “And here...” He thrust a small thumb drive at me next. “It took me so long to get it back to you because I typed it all out. I wanted you to have an electronic file too. I kept worrying about fires and floods destroying them, but I never thought Hurricane Cora would the one to...well, anyway...I know it’s not enough to make up for the ones you lost, but…here.”

I couldn’t even accept the thumb drive; I was too busy bursting into a fresh batch of tears. “Thank you,” I sobbed.

The sweetest man on earth was sitting right here, letting me soak the shirt I’d borrowed from him to wear, and I’d done nothing but hurt him.

“I love you so, so much,” I babbled as I bawled, hugging my notebook hard.

He chuckled softly. “I was just going to say that to you.” Tugging me into his lap, he wrapped his large, warm arms around me. “Do you know how happy I am that you came into my life? It feels as if I didn’t really start living until you.”

I shook my head, confused. “But I…”

He kissed me, shutting me up. “I know there’s a lot going against us right now, but I don’t care. As long as you’re at my side, willing to accept me, I’m willing to work through anything.”

Love exploded inside me. “Then so am I.”

His grin lit up his dimple. “That’s all I need to hear. We can handle this, Zoey. You and I.”

I stood in the stands of ESU’s football stadium for Quinn’s divisional championship game and shouted with the rest of the roaring fans as Ten caught a pass from Noel and went in for a touchdown, tying the score up with our opponents.

“We’re going to win, we’re going to win, we’re going to win!” Caroline chanted, nearly squeezing my arm off as she jumped up and down beside me, screaming her excitement as well.

There was still nearly four minutes left in the game. Anything could happen. But yeah, I had a feeling we were going to win.

“Go, Ellamore,” I called. Our voices were flooded out by the other seven thousand fans yelling around us, but we didn’t care. It only made us scream louder.

“Wait? Why is Noel staying on the field?” a confused Aspen said from the other side of Caroline. “Shouldn’t the kicker be coming out for the one-point field goal?”

“Oh, shit,” a tense Mason muttered from behind us. “They’re going for the two-point conversion.”

“Is that bad?” Reese asked, clutching his arm as if she thought it had to be bad.

“Not bad. Just riskier,” Pick answered her, rubbing his hands up and down Eva’s shoulders like some kind of good-luck charm.

I glanced around at our group and just grinned, feeling elated and hopeful. It was nice being here with them. Since moving in with Ten and Quinn and openly dating Quinn, they’d accepted me with no qualms at all, even though they all knew who my sister was and what she’d done. For the first time in my life, I was genuinely liked and welcomed as one of them. I had friends.

Next to me, Asher leaned close and murmured into my ear, “What’s a two-point conversion again?”

I laughed and started to point out the different players and explain it to him, but Noel had already snapped the ball and the play had begun. Forgetting my explanation, I watched as he hand-passed the pigskin to Quinn, and Quinn dove into a pile of defenders. I held my breath, waiting with seven thousand other people to see if he’d crossed the line for the two extra points.

When a referee swiped out his hands, indicating the points were no good, Caroline clutched her face and wailed, “No!”

On the other side of Aspen, her two younger brothers hollered their disappointment just as loudly.

“It’s okay,” I reassured them. “It’s okay. We’re still tied.”

We still had time on the clock to make more points, even if it was time for the other team to take possession of the ball. We could just keep them from scoring and then go into overtime to win.

But we still had three and a half minutes left, so I wasn’t worried. A lot could happen in three and a half minutes.

All the players, except one, stood and trotted off the field to switch teams.

“Someone’s hurt,” Eva announced. “Who’s hurt?”

We could tell it was one of our players by the color of the jersey. I immediately scanned the field for Quinn’s number. When I spotted him next to Ten, I blew out a relieved breath...until a frantic Aspen asked, “Where’s Noel? I don’t see Noel anywhere.”

“He’s the one who’s hurt,” Caroline uttered, suddenly pale.

I grabbed her hand and she squeezed back.

Aspen gasped and immediately covered her mouth with her hands. “Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.”

Reese and Eva rubbed her shoulders supportively from behind while Noel’s brother’s pointed when Noel bent his knee and the coaches helped him sit upright.

“Oh, thank God,” Aspen breathed out.

But I could tell Noel wasn’t completely fine. His legs could work because he stood up and everyone clapped as he hobbled to the sidelines, but he carried his shoulder all wrong.

For the next couple of plays, the ESU defense held the other team back, but not enough to keep them from scoring a field goal, putting us three points behind. All the while, Quinn and Ten—who were strictly offensive players—huddled around Noel, where he sat on a bench and had trainers working all around him.

When it was time for the offence to take the field again, Noel, the leading quarterback, did not join them. A minute and forty-eight seconds remained on the clock, and their second-string backup had to step in for him. Quinn had to step in for him.

“Oh my God,” I uttered, covering my mouth as my stomach instantly began to churn. The divisional championships now rested on my boyfriend’s shoulders.

Aspen’s phone chimed. She checked the text. “It’s from Noel. Oh God. He says they think he broke his collarbone. They’re going to take him to the hospital.”

“Well, let’s go then,” Caroline announced. “We can meet him there.”

Noel’s family and even Eva, Pick, Mason and Reese all gathered their things to leave. “Zoey?” Caroline asked, glancing at me to silently ask if I was coming.

But I shook my head. Quinn had just been thrust into the spot of quarterback at the most crucial time ever. I couldn’t leave him now.

“I...I’m going to stay.”

Asher took my hand. “I’ll stick around with her and bring her over once the game’s done.”

Caroline nodded, and then she was gone, hurrying away to follow her family.

I glanced up at Asher. He sent me a bolstering smile. “So, I know squat about football, but I can tell your man just got put in the hot seat, right?”

“Right,” I said.

The catcher who’d taken on the punt had tried to run for it, only getting us to the fifteen-yard line. I chewed my nails as a huddle formed around Quinn and he pointed out the next game plan to them.

“But he’ll do just fine,” I told Asher. “He’ll do great.” Because he was great at everything he did.

Asher squeezed my hand. “Yes, he will,” he agreed.

I clamped my grip around his fingers, and the play began. The ball was hiked to Quinn. His lineman charged into the defensive line to keep them at bay, the clang of helmets and shoulder pads making me hold my breath. When a defensive linebacker broke free and charged him, I squeaked in fear, knowing he was about to be sacked. But Quinn spun from the tackle and dodged out of the pocket, looking down the field for a receiver to catch a pass.

Ten broke free of the safety following him. As soon as he was open, Quinn wound back his arm and launched the ball his way with a Hail Mary. When it landed in Ten’s arms perfectly, I screamed and jumped up and down. Ten clutched the ball to his chest and ran a good ten more yards before he was tackled, but I kept jumpi
ng and screaming out my excitement. I sprang at Asher and hugged him before laughing and screaming some more. After such a huge play, we still weren’t far enough down the field to try for a field goal, though. And now we only had thirty-eight seconds left in the game with the clock still ticking, and no timeouts left for our team.

Quinn had to down the ball to stop the clock, but that left us with only two tries to make it ten yards before we’d have to kick.

“You can do it. You can do it. You can do it,” I chanted, watching him as he clapped his hands, breaking up the huddle. He would have to throw—there wasn’t time to try to run the ball. And everyone knew it. So the defense covered all the receivers. Quinn looked toward Ten first. But Ten had two defensive players around him, keeping him from catching anything. So, Quinn checked out another receiver, but that guy tripped and fell.

No one was open.

The defense closed in around him. Quinn sidestepped one guy trying to tackle him and found an opening, where he began to run. Oh God, he was going for it.

Since he usually played as a tight end, he knew how to run with the ball. And that’s what he did. He broke free of the main cluster, but a safety started for him and would’ve caught him if Ten hadn’t appeared out of nowhere and blocked that guy, keeping him from reaching Quinn. From there on out, he had a free sprint to the goal line, where he made a touchdown and won us the divisional championship game.

This time, even Asher screamed and jumped with me, sharing my enthusiasm. We danced in a circle and roared with the rest of the ESU fans. Our team was going to play in the national championships for the second year in a row.

“Let’s go see if we can intercept your man.” Asher took my hand and we tried to weave through the crowd together, but there was no way to get out onto the field with Quinn.