by Zoe Chant
She didn’t want him to hold her like spun glass. She wanted him to see her as a partner in battle. She wanted him to hold her like a sword.
If he was ever to trust in her strength, her resolve, she had to tell him about the day that she’d changed. The day that everything had changed.
The day she’d found her destiny.
“We’d just moved again,” she said. “It was the middle of summer vacation, thankfully. I always hated when we had to move halfway through school. We were living out of our tiny, run-down motorhome. I was supposed to stay inside while my mother was out working, but it was so hot I couldn’t stand it. I only meant to find some shade, but I found myself walking down the road. It was…I can’t describe it. Like something was pulling me on.”
He drew back a little from their embrace to gaze at her. In the moonlight, his eyes were dark, all their sparkling turquoise laughter masked in shadow. “Your shark?”
Her wet braids clung to her shoulders as she nodded. “I didn’t know that, then. I just knew that I had to keep going. I stumbled through the town, like I was sleepwalking, until I heard voices. Children’s voices. Laughing and hollering and whooping. Normally that would have had me running straight for home again. Even…even as I was, back then, other kids could always sense that there was something wrong about me. Children are more perceptive than adults.”
“And crueler,” he said, softly.
“Yes,” Seven said, and had to stop there.
He pulled her close again, without saying anything. The strong, even beat of his heart steadied her own. She closed her eyes, concentrating on his warmth—not only against her skin, but in her soul.
His gentle, steady presence gave her the strength to swallow the razor-edged memories, and find her voice again. “But something called to me, drowning out my fears. So I pushed open the gate. I went through. And found myself in the middle of a party. A pool party, in someone’s backyard. Kids running around shrieking, cannonballing into the pool, squirting water guns at each other…I just froze, trying to understand what I was seeing. It felt like I’d stepped into a whole other world.”
The baking heat of the patio through her worn flip-flops. The smoky, mouthwatering scent of the barbecue. It was all burned into her memory, so intensely that even now, years later, she could see every detail. The bright patterns of the women’s sundresses, the men’s shirts. The rainbow spray of water into the air.
And…him.
Words came slowly, inadequate to explain the enormity of that moment. “As I stood there gaping, I slowly realized that a man was watching me from across the yard. An old, old man, bald and wrinkled, but still huge. He should have been absolutely terrifying…but somehow, he wasn’t. I’d never seen him before, but I felt like I’d known him all my life. And, more than that, I felt that he knew me. Better than my own mother did. Better than I did.”
Joe let out an ear-splitting whoop, nearly scaring her out of her skin. Apparently entirely forgetting where they were, he thrust his arms in the air, and immediately sank like a stone. Seven made a grab at him as he disappeared, but not quite in time to save him from a dunking.
Joe re-emerged with lake water streaming from his broad grin. “I will bet you a week of bacon that I know what town you were in.”
Understanding dawned at last. Her heart was still hammering from the fright he’d given her, but she grinned back.
“No bet.” On a sudden playful whim, Seven splashed water at Joe, making him splutter. “You already told me he’s your godfather, remember.”
“Curses. Foiled by my own tongue.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “I am very put out, you know. Here I was, eagerly looking forward to introducing you to the Master Shark, and it turns out you’ve already met him.”
“Only that once. And I didn’t know who or what he was until much later. At the time, all I knew was that there was something about him that made everything else…” She groped for a way to explain it. “Disappear. Like he was the center of the world.”
“Yeah, he has that effect on people. Especially other sharks.” His grin shifted into a smirk. “Not to me, though. It’s hard to be in awe of someone who used to give you piggybacks round the backyard while making train noises.”
She stared at him.
Joe shrugged. “I was four. At that age, if it didn’t go ‘choo-choo’, I wasn’t interested. I’m guessing he didn’t do that with you, though.”
The mental image of the most dangerous shifter in the sea jogging in circles while intoning ‘choo-choo’ was…arresting. With an effort, she wrested her mind back to her story.
“He came over to me,” she said. “I thought he was going to yell at me, demand to know who I was, what I was doing gate-crashing the party. But he just nodded to me, as though we saw each other every day. He asked me if I wanted to swim. I told him I didn’t know how. He looked at me a moment longer, then got down on one knee, stiffly, so that we were eye-to-eye. And he said, ‘Yes. You do.’”
She could see his face as clearly as Joe’s, in front of her now. Every weathered wrinkle; every pale, faded scar. Those old, old eyes, as deep and ancient as the ocean itself.
“When he said that, he was close enough that I could see that his teeth weren’t human.” Even now, the memory still made her feel cold, an echo of the jolt of pure terror that had shot through her at the sight of those pointed, serrated rows. “I screamed and shoved him away. I ran for my life. Just like my mother had told me to do, over and over, if I ever saw someone with teeth like a shark.”
Joe blinked at her, looking nonplussed. “Hold up. You said she didn’t tell you about shifters.”
A short, painful laugh escaped her tight throat. “No. She told me that my father’s gang members filed their teeth into points. So I just thought that he was working for my father. That he’d found me at last, and was going to snatch me away from my mother. So I ran. I thought the man would pursue me, but he didn’t. He just watched me go.”
“Well, he is something like a hundred years old,” Joe said, sounding oddly defensive, as though she was attacking his godfather’s honor. “I expect he wanted to sprint after you. He found you later, right?”
“Not exactly. I ran all the way to the diner where my mom was working as a waitress, screaming and sobbing the whole way. When she finally calmed me down enough to get me to choke out what had happened...”
Seven had to stop again. That was another face that was burned in her memory—her mother’s expression in that moment. It had been the only time she’d seen her mother’s smile crack. The first time she’d realized that her mother could feel lost and terrified too.
“She took me by the hand,” she said, living it again as she spoke. “She marched straight out without even a word to her manager. We left Ochre Rock within the hour. By the time night fell, we were halfway across Arizona. We thought we’d gotten away. And then, the next evening, there was a knock on the door of our motorhome. My mother answered it with her shotgun loaded and ready.”
A kind of crazy hilarity bubbled up inside her, at the bizarre workings of fate. Of all the people who could have knocked on her door that night…she hung onto Joe’s neck, fighting to control a sudden fit of giggles.
“And that,” she concluded, “is the story of how my mother nearly shot your father.”
“My dad?” Joe yelped—and the rest was lost in bubbles, as the water closed over both their heads.
Seven kicked her way back to the surface, dragging Joe with her. “For the Crown Prince of Atlantis, you are remarkably bad at swimming.”
“Hey, you’re the one who keeps dropping these depth charges on me.” He shook water out of his eyes, grinning at her ruefully. “But yeah, we’d better continue this conversation back on land. I need solid ground under my feet for this.”
He ducked away, his long, lean body cutting smoothly through the waters. He certainly could swim, when he remembered to. Seven couldn’t resist dropping back a little, the better to admire the
flex of his muscled back.
He got to the shore first, and turned to offer her his hand, bowing like an old-fashioned gentleman helping a lady out of a carriage. He even mimed sweeping off an imaginary top hat. She rolled her eyes at him, but felt a smile tug at her lips anyway. She took his hand, letting him escort her out of the water.
She squeezed out of her braids, holding them away from her skin. “We should have brought towels. I can hardly parade through the base in my underwear, but I can’t put my armor back on while I’m dripping wet.”
“It’s a warm night. We’ll dry off soon. Just have to wait a little while to get dressed.” Joe’s voice dropped a little, taking on a hungry, feral edge that sent a delicious shiver down her spine. His heated gaze swept over her, slowly, from head to toe. “What a pity.”
His wet jeans clung to him, leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination. Seven dragged her own eyes up to his face. “I’m afraid that if you want to hear the end of the story, you’re going to have to put a shirt on. Whether you’re dry or not.”
His mouth quirked in a cocky, masculine grin. “Hey now, not fair. You can’t expect me to put clothes on over wet skin if you aren’t going to. Anyway, I don’t see what your problem is. I’m just standing here.”
He flexed, abs rippling in a way that got Seven’s full attention. She found herself taking a step toward him, her hands reaching out as though drawn by magnets.
The playfulness vanished from his face the instant her fingertips made contact with his skin. In a swift, sudden movement, he captured her hand, pressing her palm against his hard chest. A jolt of heat shot down her arm, straight to her core.
“Sea.” He breathed the word as though it was a curse. “I want you.”
He dragged her unresisting hand downward. Everything else flew out of her head. Her pulse pounded between her legs as he guided her over his ridged muscles, under the edge of his waistband, down further—
He hissed another curse, yanking her hand back up again. She couldn’t help the muffled sound of protest that escaped her lips.
“Sorry.” He released her, stepping away. He adjusted his jeans. “Got—got carried away. I think you’d better put my shirt on.”
“That really wouldn’t help,” she got out through the waves of desire pounding through her blood. “Not me, at least.”
He flashed her a pained grin. “And considering that we’ve established that you can turn me on in turn outs, it probably wouldn’t help me all that much either. But much as I want you, I also want to hear the rest of your story.” He flopped down onto the grassy lakeshore, flinging one arm across his eyes. “Okay. I’m listening, and not looking. Talk fast before I run out of willpower. You said that my dad found you and your mom?”
She sat down next to him, doing her best not to look at him either. “I found out later that the Master Shark had called him. Told him what had happened, and where to find me. The Imperial Champion must have dropped everything and travelled without rest to catch up with us. All for one confused, scared little girl.”
“Yes,” he said softly. His arm still hid his eyes, but his mouth curved in a small, fond smile. “That sounds like my dad.”
“He turned up in full armor.” She smiled as well, thinking of that tall, shining figure incongruously framed by the door of their motorhome. “I think that was the only reason my mother didn’t shoot him. He looked like he’d stepped out of a fairytale. He was too unreal to be a threat. He bowed to her, as though she was a queen, and he told her he was a knight of the First Water. And that he had come to protect us.”
She remembered his gauntleted hands, holding out his sword to her. Her own fingers had looked tiny and frail in comparison. She hadn’t understood then what he was doing, what a sea dragon’s oath meant, not even what a Knight of the First Water was.
But when she’d touched the worn hilt of the sword, when she’d looked into his indigo eyes, when she’d heard his voice…she’d known that he was speaking the truth. That he would protect them, just like he said, to his dying breath. That she and her mother were safe at last, because he was strong enough to protect them from anything.
And she could still remember, with utter clarity, thinking: I want to be like that.
She glanced at Joe and found him watching her from beneath his arm. His eyes were steady and thoughtful, as though he’d heard what she hadn’t said.
She cleared her throat. “Anyway, that’s pretty much all there is to tell. The Knights of the First Water took care of my father and his thugs. The Sea Council worked out an arrangement with my mother. She let me come to Atlantis so I could learn about my shifter side.”
Joe was still watching her with that intent, unwavering focus. “The Sea Council tried to foster you with a shark family, right?”
How had he guessed that? “Yes. But I wouldn’t go. I’d already decided that there was only one path for me. I was stubborn enough that they eventually relented, and let me join the preliminary training classes for sea dragons aspiring to join the knights. I suspect your father had something to do with that. They would never have accepted a shark without some quiet pressure from the Pearl Throne.”
“Hey, don’t give him too much credit. He might have got you in the door, but you’re the one who earned your place. I know the knights only pick about one in ten aspirants to become novices.” A swift, sudden grin flashed across Joe’s face. “My youngest sister is in training now. She’s hoping to be good enough to be chosen as a squire next year. She’s a nervous wreck about it. Maybe you can give her some tips.”
Seven privately thought that a royal princess of the Pearl Throne had very little need of her advice. The knights were supposed to be blind to bloodline when deciding who was worthy to join the Order…but there were a suspiciously high number of noble-born squires.
“Anyway, the rest you know.” She waved at her discarded armor and stun sword. “And that’s why I am the way I am. You accused me of being afraid of my animal, Joe. I’m not, truly. I just take no pride in it either. I wasn’t raised as a shark. It doesn’t form part of my identity, not the way that your own animal does for you. Can you understand that?”
“Yes.” Amusement fell away from his face. “I think I understand now. You want to be a sea dragon knight. That’s your identity.”
“Exactly,” she said, relieved. “My shark is just a handicap to overcome. I refuse to have my destiny determined by some accident of bloodline. You of all people should understand—”
“No,” Joe interrupted. He propped himself up on his elbows, his gaze holding hers. “I mean, you want to be a sea dragon knight. Seven, if Lord Azure appeared right now, this instant, and knighted you at last, would that be enough? Would you be the person that you want to be? Would you finally be happy?”
The words struck her harder than any blow she’d ever taken in combat.
Because the answer was: No.
Lord Azure could knight her. Her hair could be weighed down with golden honor-tokens. The entire city of Atlantis could hail her as a hero.
And it would still never be enough.
She looked down, shredding bits of grass between her fingers. “You must think me very foolish.”
“Oh, Seven.” Joe sat up, hitching himself closer. He put an arm around her shoulders, drawing her against his side. “I get it, you know. I really do. When I was a kid, I wanted more than anything in the world to measure up to my mom and dad. I know how much it hurts to want to be like someone, with all your soul, only to discover that you never can.”
She leaned into his warmth. His salt-sea scent wrapped around her like a quilt. “You didn’t keep dashing your heart against an impossible dream, though.”
She felt him let out a long, heavy sigh. “No. I kinda went the other way. I couldn’t live up to my role models, but I sure could be their exact opposite. I’m not claiming that’s any better.”
She closed her eyes against the burn of tears. “When I was a child, a magical knight in shining arm
or rescued me from a monster. He whisked me away to an enchanted underwater kingdom. I learned that dreams could come true.”
She longed to keep clinging to him, drawing strength from his strength…but she straightened her spine, pulling away. The warm summer night suddenly felt much colder on her damp skin.
“I never learned that not all dreams could come true,” she said. “You are right. I need to finally face reality, and find new dreams. I will never be a sea dragon.”
Joe started to speak, but she put a finger against his lips, stopping him. For a moment, she let her hand linger on his face, feeling the softness of his mouth, the slight rasp of stubble on his jaw.
Then she let him go. She sat back, set her shoulders, and made herself say what she must.
“And I will never be a knight, either.”
Chapter 25
“What?” He stared at her, trying to work out how in the sea she’d come to that conclusion. “Seven, you’re already more of a knight than most of the knights I know.”
“But I am not a knight. No matter how I act, how I feel, I cannot take that title for myself. It can only be given to me by another knight.” Seven sat very straight, her shoulders squared. Only the slightest tremble to her lower lip betrayed how hard she was fighting to keep her composure. “And Lord Azure will never do that. Because I am abandoning my quest.”
“You mean your assignment as my bodyguard?” Joe wanted to reach for her, but something about her tight, rigid posture warned him off. “Seven, I thought we’d been through this. You didn’t fail today because you aren’t a dragon. You saved me.”
“Yes. Today. But tomorrow, or the next day, or the next, I will not.” Her grey eyes flashed, stopping him as he tried to object. “You saw it, Joe. Over and over again. You knew that it was a warning that I could not stand by your side. Do not try to claim otherwise now.”
“But I’m not getting that vision anymore.” Joe waved at the lake, which still showed him nothing but the reflection of the moon. “We didn’t need to capture Lupa after all. By driving the hellhound pack off today, you changed that future.”