by M. S. Parker
I'd gotten the impression that the warning to Dax was as much about staying away from me as it had been about being diligent regarding keeping people under twenty-one from drinking.
“Come in the service entrance,” Gavin said. “Either Carrie or I should be in the office.”
A few minutes of silence followed his statement, and then I broke it. “Can I ask you a question?”
He glanced up from his tablet and nodded.
“Your parents met in Sweden, right?”
“Yes.”
I hadn't done much questioning about Gavin's past, but I was curious. “How did you end up in New York?”
Gavin straightened so that he could give me his full attention. “My dad's job changed, so he moved us all back here. He worked in New York, but after a couple of months, my mom said she didn't like living in the city. They bought a house in Stamford, Connecticut, and my time was pretty much split between the two. I went to school in Stamford, though, so I consider that my home.”
“And that's where your daughter lives?”
He nodded but didn't elaborate. He didn't need to. I'd gotten enough from Carrie to know not to ask for details. Skylar lived with her maternal grandparents, and though Gavin saw her as much as possible, he hadn't wanted to take her away from the people who'd raised her after her mother died. According to Carrie, Gavin had been too broken up over the death of his childhood sweetheart, Camille, to raise a child and had given custody to Camille's parents.
Some people would see Gavin’s actions as someone shirking their responsibility, but even after just a few days, I knew that wasn't the case. Gavin was the type of man who would do what was right for the people he loved, no matter the cost to himself.
I supposed that was why his warnings about Dax didn't make me mad. I knew Gavin's heart was in the right place.
I didn't ask any other questions as we finished our breakfast. I needed to focus on the audition. It wasn't a huge Broadway production, a new play called Collide, but it would be a foot in the door, and that’s all I really wanted. I didn't have a problem with a little assistance, especially in a world where who a person knew was sometimes more important than their abilities, but I refused to be one of those people who bought or ass-kissed their way into something rather than earning it.
My stomach was in knots when I walked into the room after waiting in line for nearly an hour. The trio of people sitting behind the table in front of me looked completely unenthused at the prospect of yet another actress coming in to read for them, which didn't help matters, but I wouldn’t let it keep me from trying.
For the longest two seconds of my life, I was afraid I'd throw up if I opened my mouth, but then I started to talk, and everything else faded away. I'd auditioned for dozens of roles back home – and gotten a little more than half of them – and even though this production was only a little bigger than any of the ones I'd done in DC, knowing that I was in New York, not that far from Broadway, somehow made it different.
I walked out of the room fifteen minutes later and felt like I was walking on air. I'd nailed it. Of course, the two women and one man who'd been listening to me hadn't said much more than thank you and explained that they'd be making their decision by the end of the week regarding callbacks, but I knew in my gut that I'd been good.
And I was pretty sure I'd seen the one woman crack a smile.
Even if I didn't get the part, I felt better knowing that I could do this. I'd made it through an audition without breaking down, vomiting, or forgetting my lines. That was one of the things I'd been worried about. I never considered myself susceptible to stage fright, but I knew there was a first time for everything. This time, at least, hadn't been it. And I hadn't been told that I was hopeless either, so that was a plus too.
I had the taxi drop me off in front of the club, but I bypassed the front door and headed around back. It was still early enough that the front doors were locked, but even if they'd been open, I'd promised to come in through the side entrance. I didn't want to do anything to get Gavin and Carrie into trouble, not when they'd done so much for me already.
I swiped the card and punched in the code Carrie had given me, then headed toward the stairs and back up to Gavin’s office. The door was closed this time, but the light was on inside, so I knocked. I heard movement, a muttered curse, and then the door opened.
Carrie's face was flushed, her curls disheveled. If that hadn't been enough to tell me that I'd interrupted a...personal moment, the annoyed expression on Gavin's face as he appeared behind her would've done it. The look only lasted a moment after he saw me, then it disappeared behind a smile.
“You look like things went well,” he said as he motioned for me to come in.
“I think they did.” I felt a little awkward, knowing they’d been getting down – hot and heavy if Carrie was any indication – until I’d coitus interrupted them, but I was pretty sure it would be worse if I actually acknowledged it. Granted, the two of them ran a sex club, but that didn't make it any less weird to talk about any of that with them.
“When should you hear if you got it?” Carrie asked.
“They'll decide callbacks by the end of the week.”
She gave me an encouraging smile. “I'm sure they'll ask you to come in again.”
I didn't want to get my hopes up, but I couldn't stop myself from smiling. “Even if they don't, make sure you tell your friend that I really appreciated her telling me about the audition.”
“If you ever decide you want to head out to LA, I'll give you her information.” Carrie glanced over at Gavin. “But tonight, we're going to celebrate.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Celebrate what? All I did was audition. We should save the celebrating until I actually get a part.”
“I think we should be celebrating your start of a new life here,” she said, her brown eyes shining. “I'm meeting with two of my friends, Dena and Leslie, for dinner. You should come with me.”
“She's underage,” Gavin said quietly.
Carrie glared at him, but even I could see how much she completely adored him. “Don't tell me that, Gavin. You'll ruin my super-secret plan to ply your innocent little niece with alcohol and corrupt her.”
He rolled his eyes while I laughed under my breath.
“Seriously, Bryne, I think you'll like Dena and Leslie. They're great.”
It wasn't like I had anything else planned. The only person other than Carrie and Gavin that I'd spoken more than a couple words to was Dax, and I hadn't seen him since he'd walked out of my hotel room.
“Sure. What time should I be ready?”
Chapter Six
The first thing I noticed when I walked into the restaurant was that I'd seen one of Carrie's friends before but couldn't figure out where. She was a good half foot taller than me, with brilliant red curls and a confidence that was evident even from across the room.
The second thing I noticed was that Carrie made a face as she took the seat next to the red-head, like sitting down was uncomfortable. Before I could ask about it though, Carrie was making introductions.
“Bryne, this is Leslie Calvin and Dena Monroe.”
I hadn't even noticed the other one until now. She was tiny, with short white blonde hair, and a fierce expression that told me it would be a bad idea to mess with her.
“Girls, this is Bryne Dawkins.”
“Gavin's niece,” Leslie said. She tilted her head and narrowed her eyes, studying me for a moment before speaking again. “You don't look like him much. Probably a good thing. He'd make an ugly woman.” She shrugged and then raised her hand to flag down a waiter.
“Don't mind Leslie. She basically says the first thing that pops into her head, whether she should or not.” Carrie tossed a sugar packet at Leslie.
Leslie caught it and tossed it back. “Somebody has to say it.”
I laughed. I hadn't had any close friends growing up, but this was how I'd always imagined it would be. Easy camaraderie, being able to say wha
tever I wanted without fear of judgment.
“Behave yourself,” Carrie said. “Gavin'll be pissed if you guys scare Bryne away.”
I gave her a startled look. While Gavin was nice and we'd talked, I hadn't gotten the impression that he felt that strongly about me. After all, he hadn't even known of my existence a week ago.
“Gavin's not always the best at showing how he really feels, but he feels deeply,” Carrie murmured, her hand stroking my arm.
“She's right,” Leslie said, turning to me with that bright smile.
It suddenly clicked where I'd seen her before. “You're engaged to Paxton Gorham.”
As soon as I said it, I wanted to take it back. I was sure she got a lot of crazies wanting to talk to her because she was engaged to one of the hottest rock musicians out there. I'd never been one of those kinds of people who fawned all over celebrities, and I didn't intend to be mistaken for one now.
“Damn straight I am.” She held out her left hand so that the diamond caught the light. “Man's all mine.”
Dena and Carrie rolled their eyes, but I leaned down to look more closely at the ring.
“It's beautiful,” I offered. “You're a lucky woman.”
“I am.” Her smile softened as she looked down at the ring. “Paxton's amazing, and so's Carter.” She looked up at me, her expression serious. “I never thought I'd settle down and get married, much less be a stepmom, but I wouldn't trade my family for anything.”
“Carter's a great kid,” Carrie agreed. Her hand moved over her stomach. “Skylar's been asking when they can play together again.”
“Gavin and Paxton are going to have their hands full with those two,” Dena said.
Leslie nodded. “Paxton's already figuring out he can't pull any of that alpha male shit with Carter, and I'll bet Gavin knows it too.” She looked at Dena. “You just wait. Arik'll find out pretty quick that his whole Dom thing won't work on a kid who wraps him around her little finger.”
“Leslie,” Carrie hissed. Her cheeks flushed as she shot a glance my way.
“Come on, Carrie,” Leslie said. “You guys run a sex club. I'm sure Bryne's figured out that...” Her voice trailed off for a moment. “Shit. Oops.”
Alpha male.
Dom.
Sex club.
Shit.
Heat flooded my face. I may have been a virgin before coming to New York, but I hadn't been a nun. I knew what all those things added up to.
“Are you guys telling me...” I looked at each of the women who were all blushing various shades of pink and red. “Well, damn.”
Carrie pointed a finger at Leslie. “This is your fault, and don't think I won't throw your ass to the wolves the second Gavin finds out you're the one who told his niece about our sex lives.”
I stared at them as they laughed. It was one thing to read about stuff like this in magazines and books, or to have theoretical discussions. It was something else entirely to be talking with three professional women who were actually living the life. These women were lawyers with established careers, and based on what I was hearing, their significant others were something out of a romance novel.
The really dirty kind that included whips and ball-gags.
Something clicked, and I turned toward Carrie. “You winced when you sat down. Was that from...” I couldn't figure out the best way to finish the question, so I let it dangle in the air.
Dena chuckled. “Punishment or play?”
Carrie glared at her friend. “None of your damn business.”
Leslie's laugh was loud, but not obnoxious. “That means it was punishment. What'd you do?”
I couldn't believe the conversation going on around me. They were teasing each other, but it was clear there was no shame or humiliation in it. I had no idea how they'd gotten into this lifestyle, but they apparently loved it.
And I wanted to know more.
So for the next couple hours, we talked about sex more matter-of-factly than I ever had before. They told me how each of them had come to be involved in BDSM, how they'd decided what their own preferences were. They talked about terms like Dom and Sub and Switch, and what they really meant. The true nature of those sorts of relationships. I almost felt like I was back in school, trying to memorize terms and definitions, except the subject matter was nothing like what I'd learned in school. Sex Ed had made most of my classmates giggle and blush, but it wasn't even comparable to the conversation I was a part of. Even without alcohol, by the time we were done, my head was spinning.
“So,” Carrie began as we headed for the door, “did we completely freak you out?”
“No, but it was definitely different.” I zipped up my coat and followed her outside.
There'd been a question hovering in the back of my mind, refusing to leave, no matter how much noise everything else was causing. A part of me wanted to say that it didn't matter what answer Carrie gave, that it wouldn't change anything, but I still couldn't stop thinking about it.
So I gave in and asked, “Does everyone who works at Club Privé...are they all into the whole BDSM thing?”
Carrie gave me a sideways glance as a town car pulled up to the curb. “This wouldn't happen to have anything to do with a certain club employee whose wallet I returned earlier this week, would it?”
My cheeks burned. “Maybe.”
She grinned and climbed into the back. The driver was different than the one who'd taken us to the club, but he still greeted Carrie by name. Apparently, Gavin wasn't just a club owner, but a successful entrepreneur in a variety of ways, including running a car service. He'd offered me the use of it free of charge, something I'd forgotten on my way to the audition. Nana and Papa had employed a couple drivers, but I'd only used them for special events. I'd always preferred to drive myself.
Not that I intended to do much of that here. Aside from the fact that I was pretty sure my car was about to give up the ghost, until I knew the city better, I didn't intend to experiment with navigating myself.
“Is the whole S&M thing the reason Gavin told me to stay away from Dax?” I blurted out the question, then glanced toward the front of the car, wishing I'd been a little more discreet.
“Don't worry about him,” Carrie said. “The window between us is soundproof. Once he rolls it up, we have to use the intercom to talk.”
I relaxed a little bit more into the seat and looked expectantly at Carrie as I waited for an answer to my question.
“That's part of it,” she finally said.
“Seems a bit hypocritical,” I pointed out.
One side of her mouth tipped up in a partial smile. “Have you ever noticed, that when it comes to members of their family, men are often that way?”
I shrugged. “I wouldn't know. I never really had the chance to learn.”
She reached over and squeezed my hand. “Gavin really is trying to look out for you.”
“So you think Dax is a bad guy too?”
She paused, clearly thinking about what she was going to say. Finally, she shook her head. “Not exactly. Gavin was right in that some of the people Dax spends time with aren't exactly the nicest people.”
I nodded, remembering the other guys who'd been in the shop that first night. I wasn't one to judge by appearance, but my gut told me those guys had earned any reputation that followed them.
Still, there was something about Dax.
“And the women?” I tried to keep my tone casual, but the look in Carrie's eyes told me that I wasn't fooling her.
“He does have a bit of a reputation as the kind of man who isn't interested in the long-term.” She squeezed my hand again. “But there's more to him than that. Without going into details, I can say that Dax will do anything for the people he cares about, and I think, for the right woman, he'd change his ways.”
I nodded but didn't say anything. I didn't have anything to say. My brain felt like it was on overload trying to sort out everything that'd happened in the past few days. I knew I shouldn't even be co
nsidering having anything more to do with Dax, and not only because of the warnings Gavin had given me. The career path I'd chosen wasn't an easy one, and I should focus on it. Get myself into a couple shows and find a place of my own. Once I was solid, then I could think about romance.
Besides, Dax said he didn't want a relationship.
A little voice in the back of my head said that maybe that was a good thing. Maybe I didn't have to worry about all those questions. Dax hadn't said he didn't want to see me again. He said he'd enjoyed himself, and that he'd see me around. Maybe the answer to everything was a happy medium. I enjoyed spending time with Carrie and Gavin, but it'd be nice to have someone else to hang out with, to go do things with.
Friendship wasn't a relationship. Not like the one Dax had said he didn't want. Hell, maybe we could throw in some benefits and get the advantage of having sex without the headache that came with having a boyfriend.
I wanted to sleep on the idea, but maybe I'd feel the same way in the morning. If I did, then I’d have a little trip to make after Gavin and Carrie went to work.
Chapter Seven
The weather hadn't gotten any warmer, though we hadn't had another snowstorm since the night I'd first arrived, but the sun was bright enough to hurt my eyes as I got out of my car and stood in front of DeMarco's & Sons. Idly, I wondered about the grammatical correctness of the sign but knew I was only stalling.
I wanted to see Dax again, more than I truly felt comfortable admitting, even to myself. I'd reminded myself repeatedly that I'd had plenty of male friends back home, and this was no different. True, none of them were close friends, and I hadn't wanted to sleep with any of them, but I was determined to make this work. Carrie seemed to think Dax was a decent guy, so I'd take her word for it.
I took a slow, steady breath, rubbed my sweating palms on my jeans, and stepped inside.
Like the first night I'd been here, the noise hit me before anything else. It was louder than before, with more people working and moving about. No one was behind the desk, so I took a moment to look around. The table where Dax and his friends had sat was empty, but I spotted one of the guys working on a massive motorcycle. Pretty much everyone was working on motorcycles, and since I couldn't tell one from another, it all pretty much looked the same.