David shook his head hard. “I am all to blame, Chris. You did nothing but protect your wife.” His voice lowered regretfully. “You were right when you said I was jealous. I was jealous of everything you had. When you first married Dustin, it was a sort of game to try and get you to like her. But when you came to love her, I felt left out. I guess I had to find something wrong with her to make you not love her so that things would be as they had been. Can you ever forgive me?”
Christopher’s eyes were warm. “I understand you returned to Lioncross to act as her protector. That proves to me how sorry you were for what happened.”
David snorted ironically. “A lot of good I did. She married Marcus anyway.”
“Richard said you tried to kill Marcus in a sword fight,” Christopher said. “Very brave of you, little brother. I spent half the day yesterday trying to do the same thing.”
David shrugged, not voicing what he was thinking. That their friendship had come to this still bothered him greatly. He glanced back at his troops after a moment.
“I have got three hundred men to reinforce your ranks,” he said, “if you shall have me.”
Christopher smiled broadly. “I would have no other.” He slugged his brother again and moved toward his destrier. “What is this I hear that you have taken a wife?”
David snickered at his brother’s disbelieving tone. “I did, and a lovely woman she is. But she came with two sisters and they are driving me crazy.”
Christopher crowed with laughter as he mounted. “You deserve all that and more. You never could handle a woman.”
David mounted his dancing animal. “They are not women. They are the spawn of Satan.”
“Not Nathalie,” Christopher said. “She is an obedient, thoughtful girl.
“That is what she wants you to believe,” David sneered. “She puts on a prim and proper front, and then when your guard is down – boom. And Elise, the youngest, is even worse. Do you know that they put honey on my pillow? And charcoal in my helmet? I went for half a day with black hair and had no idea why my men were laughing at me.”
Christopher laughed heartily at the mental picture of his high-strung brother dealing with two disobedient children. “David, I think I like these girls. You must tell me more sometime.”
David made a face. “Later.”
Christopher waved at him and they turned tail on one another, returning to their respective armies. For them both, the world suddenly seemed a little brighter, a little more hopeful.
David’s men set up camp and it was truly like old times. Richard had his inner circle of knights about him and he could not have been more pleased. In spite of the tension in the air, David and Marcus had barely acknowledged one another and kept their distance, dampening Richard’s mood a bit, but it could not be helped. He would have rather had them ignoring each other than trying to slit one another’s throats.
The army from Windsor was expected on the morrow and Richard took leave of his men and went to bed early. Christopher and David were standing around the massive pyre, watching the sparks fly into the dark night and speaking of insignificant things. Christopher wanted to know more of his new sister-in-law, Emilie, and was eager to hear of David’s exploits with her younger sisters. He laughed until he cried picturing his brother trying to handle two spirited young girls.
They were laughing about something or another when Marcus strolled past the fire, eyeing the two brothers impassively. Christopher gazed back, as did David, and immediately the tension rose. Harold, at Christopher’s feet, rose and snarled menacingly.
“Marcus,” he greeted formally.
Marcus merely nodded his head, crossbow strung over his shoulder, and continued on his way. David watched him disappear into the night before letting out a hissing sigh.
“Be mindful that he doesn’t use that thing on your back,” he referred to the crossbow. “Marcus is the best archer in the realm.”
Christopher nodded. “I am well aware of his skill,” he looked at his brother and slugged him playfully. “That is why I have you here, to cover my back.”
David grinned, gazing at his brother a moment. “I told you once that you had changed. I cannot believe how much you have changed.”
“How so?” Christopher raised his brows.
“Jesus, Chris, how haven’t you changed?” David snorted. “The Lion’s Claw I knew had little sense of humor and ate and drank and slept war on the field. The only time I ever saw you relax was with a woman in your arms. But right now…I mean, look at us. Since when did we like and slug each other like a couple of lads? And that ugly dog is constantly with you; you always hated animals. Furthermore, you smile all the time. You never used to smile at all. I wondered at times if you even knew how. You have taken on a dimension I never knew you had.”
Christopher shrugged. “There is much in life to be happy over, I suppose. I love my wife, my daughter. Why should not I smile?”
David grinned at him and shook his head. “Then you were right. Love hasn’t made you weak; it is made you invincible.”
Christopher nodded deliberately, pleased his brother was seeing the truth of it. “And Emilie? Do you love her?”
David looked embarrassed, kicking at the ground “I don’t know. I’m very fond of her, God knows. But love… well, it scares me.”
“As it frightened me,” Christopher looked thoughtful. “I seem to remember a close relative of mine, male of course, tell me once that if I would only allow my wife to love me that everything in this world would right itself. Quit fighting her, I was told. Now I wonder who told me that?”
David looked away sheepishly. “Some idiot, I am sure.”
Christopher smiled. “A wise idiot. He should follow his own advice.”
David crossed his thick arms and drew in a deep breath. “Mayhap. But I swear I am going to kill her sisters one of these days.”
Christopher chuckled. “Don’t you dare. I am pleased that they are proving to be a thorn in your arrogant side.”
“Arrogant,” David choked. “Now look who’s calling me arrogant. Jesus, out of the mouth of the man who invented the term.”
They grinned at each other, watching the fire burn in comfortable silence. Bootfalls caught their attention and they both looked through the flames to see Marcus appearing out of the darkness.
“Posts are secured, my lord,” he told Christopher formally.
Christopher nodded slightly. “Very good.”
Marcus gave a slight bow and turned on his heel, but Christopher stopped him. He did not know why he should, but somehow, it just wasn’t right for them to hate each other. It was as if the earth was out of balance, or the stars out of alignment. It was unnatural and went against the grain. With everything that had happened, he still yearned for his friend.
“You did not eat,” he said.
Marcus’ face was unreadable. “I wasn’t hungry.”
Christopher sighed. “Will you join us?”
Marcus’ eyes widened a bit and he eyed David. “Nay, my lord, I do not think so.”
Christopher sat on the log behind him and rested his ankle on his knee. “Sit down, Marcus.”
David took his own seat, not looking at Marcus. Marcus looked at the two brothers, once his very best friends, and he, too, yearned for the way things had once been. But there was so much hurt and anger in his heart that it was difficult to see past it. Yet he could see that Christopher was making some sort of effort to be civil, and he decided to reciprocate. But he wondered if David was hiding a dagger in his belt with his name on it.
Slowly, he lowered his big body onto an upturned log and sat stiffly, his hands clasped in front of him. Harold growled threateningly at him and Christopher admonished the dog sternly.
“Have you seen your father since you have returned?” Christopher asked.
Marcus shook his head. “Nay, even though Leicester is less than a day from Somerhill,” he said. “The last I heard of my father, the earl, he and his new wif
e were busy on a family of their own. He has no time for his second son from his first wife.”
“What of your brother? Surely you have seen him?” Christopher asked.
“My brother, the monk?” Marcus said with some contempt. “The man will inherit the earldom when my father dies and doesn’t know a damn thing about running it. As far as I know, he’s still at Westminster. I did not even see him when I was in London.”
Christopher looked at him a moment before staring back into the flames. It began to occur to him that Marcus felt alone in the world, abandoned by his father and forgotten by his brother. He had no one at all, which was probably why he was so determined to hang on to Dustin. He needed the security of a family from her desperately, and Christopher wondered if he was even aware of it.
“Tell me something, Marcus,” he said after a moment. “Are you so resolved to keep Dustin because you love her or because you have no family ties whatsoever? Is she and Christin your ready-made family or are they the love of your life?”
Marcus’ features grew dark. “How in the hell can you ask me that? I told you once and I shall tell you again, I love her.”
Christopher kept calm; he truly wasn’t trying to rile Marcus, but simply help him think. “It could not be because your mother died when you were young and your father deposited you on the Earl of Derby when you were five? You have never had the closeness or strength of a woman or a family as I have. Is she somehow filling a role for you, a role you have forced upon her whether or not she is willing?”
Marcus stood up, his big fists clenched. “To hell with you,” he snared. “How dare you judge me.”
David sighed heavily and shook his head. Christopher glanced at his brother, pleased that he was keeping his calm but knowing it was difficult for him.
“I am not judging you,” he said softly. “I did not mean to upset you, Marcus. I am just trying to understand. Please sit and we shall speak no more about it.”
Marcus did not sit, but he did not leave, either. “How dare you probe me, Chris,” he hissed. “How dare you try and analyze my actions. By what right?”
“ ’Tis my right because it is my wife you married,” Christopher reminded him.
Marcus’ jaw ticked. “And my daughter she bore.”
“You bastard.” David could hold still no longer. He snarled at Marcus. “You are the most….”
“Shut up, David.” Christopher cut his brother off, returning his gaze to Marcus with less calm than before. “If she is your child, kindly explain how it is she looks like me?”
“We all see what we want to see,” Marcus said quietly. “You see yourself, and I see me. But I know without a doubt that she is my flesh and blood.”
“Wishful thinking,” David snapped. “She’s not your child, Marcus. She is as much your daughter as Dustin is your wife, which is not at all.”
“Stay out of this, David,” Marcus warned. “This does not concern you.”
“The hell it doesn’t!” David snarled. “Anything that concerns Chris concerns me. I should have spilled your guts when I had the chance.”
“You never had the chance,” Marcus said smoothly. “If you recall, I was winning our bout when Richard separated us. If anyone’s guts were to be spilled, it would have been yours.”
“Arrogant son of a bitch,” David rumbled. “Jesus, Marcus, what has Chris ever done to you that you would try and destroy his life?”
Marcus stopped in his tracks. He was preparing for an all-out verbal fight with the two brothers when David’s words suddenly struck him. Faltering, he turned away from the two of them because he honestly could not reply. He never thought of the situation in that context; what had Christopher ever done? My God, was he being vindictive for the fact that Christopher had earned a greater reputation, or had found more favor with the king and he did not even realize it? Confusion swept him.
“Is…is that what it looks like? That I am seeking some sort of revenge?” he murmured, turning back around to face Christopher. “That I am out to destroy you?”
Christopher just looked at him, not replying. Marcus had asked the question with such bewilderment that it was difficult not to feel his honesty. The white-hot tension that had surrounded them was draining away and even David began to relax.
“What do you think?” David said earnestly. “Of course it looks like you are trying to take everything away from my brother. His wife, his child, his life… why, Marcus? Did he wrong you somehow?”
Marcus shook his head vehemently, his puzzlement overwhelming. “Nay,” he breathed. “I am not trying to punish him for a wrong against me. We just happen to love the same woman.”
Christopher sighed, leaning forward with his arms resting on his knees. “Marcus, she is my wife and Christin is my daughter. Your marriage to her is void anyway because I was alive when you married her. She was never your wife, and she was always mine.” He looked up at him. “I have tried to be patient. I have tried not to become angry. I have threatened you and I have fought you. Dustin has even told you that she doesn’t want you. What will it take, then, for you to leave us in peace?”
Marcus, a man of considerable pride, lowered his gaze uncertainly. Everything that was said, albeit unpleasant, made sense even to him. He did not want to admit it, any of it, but it was clear even to him that he was in the wrong. As if a fog had lifted and revealed a scene as clear as heaven itself, he suddenly realized how very terrible he had been.
But, God, he loved her. His motives had always been very sincere toward Dustin; he simply loved her. But David’s words and Christopher’s words seeped into his brain, and even as he tried to fight off their meaning, his common sense and moral character could not deny their correctness. They were right; they had always been right, and he had been selfish and absorbed. He had been right when he told Christopher that both of them saw what they wanted to see. He only saw his love for Dustin and completely disregarded her feelings, as well as Christopher’s. Only his wants had mattered to him because he was used to having his desires fulfilled.
But Dustin did not want him; she had told him that, but he had chosen to believe that he could make her love him if he tried hard enough. Mayhap for the first time in his life Marcus realized he could not manipulate the situation to his advantage. With a stab of pain to his chest, he realized that he had indeed been self-indulgent and ignorant. God help him, he did not want to let her go, but as much as he loved her, he knew he had to.
His strength drained from his body and he collapsed on the upturned log. He stared into the flames of the pyre for an endless amount of time, weary and defeated.
“I love her,” he murmured slowly. “I was blinded by her beauty, her innocence, her charm. She made me forget all that I am and all that I stand for, and I will tell you now that I am deeply ashamed to admit my guilt. I took it for a game, at first, but my obsession with her grew and I could not control it.” He looked up at Christopher’s sad eyes. “I will not fight you for her anymore, Chris. I can see now that I have already done enough damage.”
David was shocked to see Marcus fold so quickly. He blinked at his brother, whose expression was one of sorrow.
“I trusted you once and you betrayed me,” Christopher said hoarsely. “I am having difficulty believing you.”
“No doubt,” Marcus said with defeat. “I could swear to you on the Bible, but I think mayhap even that would not be strong enough. If I swear to you on my oath as a knight, will you believe me?”
Christopher looked at the fire, not wanting to doubt Marcus’ oath, for the man was the best knight in the realm. But he was bitter and weary and tired of deceit.
“Mayhap in time,” he whispered. “Mayhap your actions will speak louder than words.”
Marcus was bewildered and frustrated, at himself, at everything. “I am not completely guilty in all of this,” he said. “You proved to be spiteful and irrational, too. If there is any betrayal to be felt, I should be allowed a small portion.”
Chris
topher’s head came up. “What are you talking about?”
“In London, Chris. Do you remember how crazed jealous you were when I was around your wife? We had done absolutely nothing at that time, yet you were wild with envy,” Marcus reminded him.
“You had kissed her,” Christopher returned.
Marcus threw up his hands. “An innocent taste, I swear to you. I felt nothing for her at the time. It was, as I said, a game. My feelings for her followed shortly thereafter.”
Christopher let out a laborious sigh. “I do not know, Marcus. I just do not know what to think or believe anymore.”
Marcus watched his former friend as he stared at his hands. “Do you know that even after I married her, she refused to take your wedding rings off?” he said. “I am not daft, Chris. I knew she did not love me, but I hoped with time that things would change. And they would have, but with you returned, even I know that there is no hope.”
With that, Marcus stood up and walked away, leaving Christopher drained and David astonished.
“Do you think he is sincere?” David asked.
Christopher ran a hand through his hair. “Oh, hell, David, I don’t know,” he sighed heavily. “I would like to hope so, but he has lied to me before where Dustin was concerned. I will not allow myself to be sucked in again. We shall just have to wait and see.”
David puffed out his cheeks and sat down, shaking his head in wonder. He never thought he would live to see the day when Marcus Burton backed down from anything. Surprisingly, he wasn’t leery as his brother was.
He believed him.
*
In the shadows, young Darren watched his liege and the other two men. He remembered well how close the three had been and was deeply distressed to see the bitterness and mistrust between them.
Their animosity was because of Lady Dustin, yet they were all united because of her. She had split them, but she had pulled them together. It was a strange paradox and one he never thought to understand. He could see how terribly upset they were over her capture and in his smart, quick mind, he was formulating a plan.