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“Ah, damn, figured that would happen,” Micah drawls, his head in his hand, long fingers tapping against the side of his face as he smirks. “He’s going to be on a total rampage. Better watch out. Do you like anger fucking? I bet you could get some good stuff if you approached him now.”
“You’re such a … urinal cake,” I grumble, and Micah grins.
“Mr. Dave, huh? We can keep an eye on him, too. Can’t hurt, right? At least with you out of Adamson, we won’t have to worry as much.”
“How do you know the killers won’t come after you next? If we don’t know their motivations, we don’t know who they’re going after or why.” I keep my gaze on the competition as Spencer hops on the edge of the fence to watch.
Now that he’s lost … this is all going to be on me, whether or not I want to date the twins.
So much pressure.
Then I realize that I’m not going to be here at all, so dating anyone is pretty much out of the question. I’ll move away; they’ll forget all about me. Life sucks.
“I guess we don’t, but we do know that they’re interested in you.” Micah turns to look at me with an almost perplexed sort of expression on his face, his red-orange hair catching the light. “Everyone seems to be. I wonder why that is? Frankly, you’re a bit of a shithead.”
“Like you aren’t?” I retort back, nibbling at my lower lip. At least if I choose Santa Cruz, I’ll get to see the twins during breaks and stuff, right? Like maybe even for the whole summer? “Did you or Tobias ever date that Emily girl?” I’m not sure why I ask the question, or why I even care, but there it is, hanging in the air between us like smoke.
Micah doesn’t look bothered by it.
“Who?” he asks, and I almost smile.
“The girl who was in the kitchen with you that morning, the one that kept calling you Toby.” He blinks his green eyes for a moment, and then drags his attention from the field to my face.
“Hell no. I barely know who that is. People drop in for our parties all the time, but I can’t be bothered memorizing a sea of ass kissers and gold diggers. Too much work.”
“Did you sleep with her?” And yet another question I shouldn’t have asked. Really, it’s none of my business. I avert my eyes from Micah’s face and focus briefly on the brick floor under my stool.
“Nope. Why? Are you a jelly doughnut?”
I snort.
“I could care less.” I push my glasses up my nose, and Micah smirks, reaching out and plucking them from my face. I try to grab them back, but he holds them out of my reach. “If you don’t give those back, I will punch you in the balls.”
“At least you’ll be touching them,” he purrs, smelling like tart cherries and bullshit. I’m eating it up, too. “Why do you care so much about Emma if you’re not jealous?”
“Emily,” I correct, and Micah stands up, too tall for his own good. I’m going to have to climb him like a tree to get my glasses back. Not an idea I’m totally and completely opposed to … “I was just curious. It’s none of my business, really. I shouldn’t have even asked.”
“Except that you did,” he says, popping the glasses back on my face, grabbing my shoulders, and turning me to face the window. Micah leans down and breathes against my ear. “Well, would you look at that.” I gape as I realize that in the ten seconds I wasn’t looking, Tobias has managed to shoot both Church and Ranger.
He’s won.
He’s fucking won.
“Now you can kiss me and not feel guilty about it,” Micah says as Ross cheers and whistles, waving at the boys through the window.
Crap.
Rock, hard place. Why are you tormenting me so?
Micah leans in, but I dance away from him, waiting for the others to make the trudge up the hill.
“Did you see that shit?!” Tobias calls out, storming into the room and scooping me up before I can even think about how I should react. He kisses me on the lips—hard—and I feel this fire burst through me that’s half guilt, half unadulterated lust.
Spencer scowls as his friend sets me on the floor, grinning triumphantly. Church looks satisfied, like the cat who’s got the cream, and Ranger just appears to be annoyed at the whole situation.
“Now that that’s over, we just have to figure out how to keep Chuck here,” Tobias continues, but clearly, Spencer isn’t in the same mindset. He looks at me with his beautiful eyes, and I can’t resist, I go to him and let him put his arms around me. I can feel the others watching me, but I don’t move.
“I’m not a cheater,” I tell him, and he laughs, stirring my hair.
“Never thought you were. I’m also not a liar. I said what I meant. If you want to … I don’t know, explore shit with those cinnamon stick assholes, then fine.” He pushes me back a step and looks so deeply into my eyes, I feel like I’m falling. “I’m not afraid. We have something here, Chuck-let. Once you spend time with them, you’ll realize it.”
“Cinnamon stick assholes?” I ask, because come on, that’s a weird one, even for me.
“They’re redheads, so they have red pubes on their dicks, thus, you know, they look like cinnamon sticks.” I snort and slap a hand over my mouth, but it’s hard to keep it in.
“Fuck you, Spencer,” Tobias says as Ranger moves up to the counter to order something.
“Have you told her about Amber yet?” Spencer retorts, and Tobias’ already narrowed eyes turn to slits. “You can’t date Chuck if you don’t tell her about Amber.”
“What is there to tell?” Tobias spits back, and Micah scowls. They’ve never looked less in sync than they do right now. It’s disconcerting. “You know, I let her stay in Amber's room.” It must be a big deal, if they throw this girl’s name around like she’s the be-all, end-all. Tobias looks me straight in the face, and a shiver goes through me. “I was dating a girl I really liked. She …” He shrugs and rubs his hands over his face. “Micah and Amber were screwing behind my back.”
My eyes widen, and Micah curses, throwing back the rest of his beer and storming out of the room before I can even think of how to respond. Several random comments and arguments I’ve encountered make so much more sense, like when Tobias was talking about how Ranger wanted to protect his sister’s legacy, no matter what she’d done, and Micah got angry and … well, stormed off like he did just now.
Then there was Spencer’s comment about the twins saying they shared girls—since Amber, you mean.
I feel like I’ve just opened up a can of worms.
“Can we please talk about something else?” Tobias groans, ruffling up his hair. His eyes meet mine. “We have just over a day to figure out what to do about your dad.”
“Maybe if I tell him I’m dating the Student Council, he’ll give in and let me stay?” I joke, and Ross makes a scoffing sound under his breath.
“Not the whole Student Council, honey,” he says, giving me a look and then taking his drink outside. As soon as the door closes, he answers a phone call and leans up against the side of the building.
“Any ideas?” Spencer asks, giving Tobias a skeptical look. “I mean, we couldn't possibly let our girlfriend fly across the country, right?” He props himself up on the wall, accepting the soda that Ranger brings his way. Church joins us and we stand in a small circle in the quiet café. The only other patrons are in the back corner, giggling and playing footsie. Gross.
“I've already tried to bribe the headmaster,” Church adds, eyes lifted to the ceiling as he muses, stirring his iced coffee and making the cubes clink against the glass. “Didn't work. A threat, perhaps from your mother, Tobias?”
“No, if I ask that, she'll ship me off to some military school,” he says, frowning, and I raise a brow. I'd had that same thought recently, only about myself. I wonder what he did prior to coming here to earn that level of distrust from his mom? “Are you sure you don't want us to all traipse over there?”
“The headmaster knows something,” Church repeats, and I frown. I don't want to believe that Dad's s
omehow involved in all of this shit. So I relay what Ross said about Mr. Murphy and Mr. Dave. Ranger and Church exchange a look, but I can't even begin to decipher what they're thinking.
“Maybe we start there? Question the two of them?” Spencer asks, but it all feels so hopeless.
I can feel it in my gut: I'm going back to California.
“I'll talk to him again,” I say, but I don't have a lot of hope.
Archie Carson is as stubborn as I am.
Dialing Mom's number gets me nowhere. She's changed it again. And when I go downstairs to ask Dad to give me her new one, he gives me this look.
“Pleading with your mother behind my back won't change anything.”
I cross my arms over my chest.
“Why?”
“Charlotte, I've explained this numerous times.” He stands up from the table, getting ready to run away again. Yep, he's most definitely lying. My father doesn't like to back down from fights, especially ones he already knows he's won. “Now, I'm going in there to book your flight, so if you have a preference, I need to know.”
He starts walking, and I trail after, pulling the stone from my pocket.
“Do you know what this is?” I ask, and he takes it briefly, studying it for a moment before handing it back to me.
“No, I don't. And frankly, I don't see what this has to do with anything.” I frown, but pocket the stone again anyway.
“I'm dating Spencer,” I say, just for the shock value. Dad doesn't react at all, continuing into his office and sitting down at his desk.
“Even more reason for you to leave,” he murmurs under his breath, pulling up the airline and typing in the date for my one-way flight. “We both know how much of your time and attention these relationships take up.”
“That's such a cop-out response, and you know it,” I say, wondering if I should throw in the twin thing, too, really give him a run for his money. “I have better grades here than I ever did back home.”
“And yet you ran off to New York City the other night while feeding me a lie about the lantern ceremony.” My mouth drops open, and I gape at him as he starts to put in LAX as my destination city.
“San Jose,” I murmur, feeling my heart drop, and all the energy drain out of me. “I'm going to be heartbroken and lonely either way, better to be somewhere I'm familiar with. And why you'd think Los Angeles of all places is any better or safer than here is laughable.”
He ignores me, selecting a flight and continuing onto the next page as I slump into the chair on the opposite side of his desk.
“Actually, I'm in a four-way polyamorous sort of thing with the McCarthy twins, too,” I add, just to see if that'll draw some energy out of the old man. His nostrils flare, but he gets his credit card out and types in the information anyway.
“Instead of embarrassing yourself further, why don't you start packing? Whatever you can't fit in your suitcases, we'll ship.”
“You're hiding something from me,” I say, but still, he refuses to look at me. “The more you ignore me, the more obvious it becomes.”
“Go start packing,” he tells me, and I force myself to my feet with a huff, giving him a dark look.
“Sending me away is going to be the biggest mistake you've ever made,” I say before heading out the door and upstairs to my room.
I don't stay there for long.
Why should I?
Archie’s already inflicting me with the worst punishment he’s got up his sleeve: banishment.
“I sent you Jenica's whole journal,” Ranger tells me as we sit inside the girls' dorm, and he stares up at the spot on the wall where her picture used to hang. There's a slight discoloration where it should be; I wonder if we'll ever figure out who took it? “And her suicide note. Pictures of it all, anyway.”
“Thank you,” I tell him, because I know it's hard for him to reveal his sister's secrets like this. When I was younger, I used to be glad I didn't have any siblings because it meant I didn't have to share anything. Now, I'm sort of glad because it just means I don't have to worry. And yet, there's a little green streak of envy in you that wishes you had someone you could confide in, someone to care about as much as Tobias and Micah care about each other.
“We should go cook something,” he says finally, as everyone else sits in silence around the room. I'm on the couch between Spencer and Tobias, trying not to squirm, but so unsure as to what, exactly, we've got going on here that I'm afraid to bring it up.
“One last hurrah for the Culinary Club, huh?” Micah says, frowning. “This fucking blows. Are you seriously leaving in the morning?”
“Seriously,” I say, feeling sick to my stomach as I slump back into the cushions. “At seven o'clock sharp.” I swing my fist and imitate the gruffness of my father's voice. “And just after I won the right to date the entire Student Council. Can you only imagine?”
“Not the entire Student Council,” Spencer grumbles, looking across at Tobias. The two of them stare at each other for a long moment as Ranger snorts.
“I don't date,” he says, and that's that. Church doesn't say anything, and Micah grins.
“Just because you're leaving doesn't mean we can't date.”
“Come on,” I tell him, reaching out to grab one of the cold sodas from the cooler on the table, “I've tried the long-distance high school relationship thing before. It didn't exactly work out.”
“Don't compare us to that useless urinal cake,” Micah snorts, shaking his head, and then exchanging a look with his brother. “You've never dated guys with private jets. We can be in Santa Cruz during every break. Besides, we're only two months out from summer vacation.”
“Are you guys going to come visit me?” I tease, because I can't imagine what the hell I'll be doing all summer by myself. Surfing? I guess at least I'll be ripped the next time they see me.
“Of course we are,” Spencer scoffs, pushing his silver hair back. He looks devastated, which in a weird way makes me happy. He really does care that I'm leaving. “This isn't permanent. Next year, you'll be back at Adamson, I swear it.”
“Are you all really going to try this dating thing?” Ranger asks, sinking back into his chair and studying the three of us.
“Definitely,” the twins say in unison.
“Pretty much,” Spencer replies with a sigh, reaching down to take my hand. He squeezes it hard, and I feel my heart drop. Being separated from my new friends is going to hurt.
I just hope it doesn't kill me.
I've never been so miserable on a plane in my life. Spencer gave me the money to upgrade to first-class (don't tell Archie; we did it on the app) so the service is good, and the seats are comfy, but holy hell … I feel like crying.
The flight has Wi-Fi, but I don't bother to connect my phone. If I do, I'll end up chatting with the guys, and I'll feel even more sick to my stomach than I already do.
Once we've landed, and I've collected my bags, I find my Aunt Elisa idling at the curb, and flirting with the on-duty security officer whose job it is to make sure people don't spend too much time idling at the curb.
I sigh.
Some things never change.
“Auntie,” I say, trying to make myself smile. There's no point in starting off on a bad foot with my aunt, the only person standing between me and LA. Speaking of …
“Charlie!” my mom shouts, surprising me from the backseat of my aunt's tiny '97 Honda Accord. Elisa had the windows tinted for her as a birthday present from her ex-boyfriend, years ago, because she says better things happen in the backseat than the front. Gross.
“Mom,” I blurt, standing there with my bags in either hand and gaping at the woman I haven't seen in what feels like forever. She looks … better than when I last saw her, but nothing like the way my memory shaped her, as a beautiful, young woman with an inner vibrancy that was unmatched. How she ended up with Archie is beyond me, but maybe it was an opposites attract sort of a thing? Their age difference has always sort of bothered me, although I know
my dad isn't the pervy type. He loves my mother, probably more than he loves me. I've always thought that. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m here to see you, silly,” she says, her blond hair tied back in a loose ponytail, the new lines on her face a sign of how hard these last few years have been. Clearly, she has demons that I know nothing about. For four years, I’ve tried to understand what those are, but I’ve come to the realization recently that I don’t know my mother as well as I thought. Maybe I never did? “I took the bus up here, and your aunt is going to drive us back.” My eyes narrow in suspicion. I made my choice. I'm not going to Los Angeles. I'd rather stay in Santa Cruz, where at least I know I can hang out with the twins during school breaks. That, and I do know people here. Starting fresh all over again sounds like hell.
“Okay. But why? I've decided to go back to SCHS.”
“You can at least come see my new apartment, and tour the schools your father and I picked out for you.”
“I'm not going to LA,” I repeat, and Mom frowns. What makes her think she can order me around after disappearing without a word? “The last thing I want to do is sit in a hot car for five hours. Can I please just go back to Elisa's place and get settled?”
My aunt stays frozen in the front seat, hands on the wheel, as she looks between the two of us with curious brown eyes. She's pretty, but her makeup isn't my favorite, very harsh and dark. It makes her look older than she should. I’m pretty sure I got my obsessive need to fit in from this side of the family; Archie clearly has no problem being hated by everyone around him.
“Charlotte, are you trying to hurt my feelings?” she asks, frowning, a few loose strands of hair hanging in big ringlets around her face. It's a bit thinner and duller than I remember it being, but I suppose it's part of the price she paid for hitting the drugs so hard? There are wrinkles around her mouth that were never there before either, lines that a thirty-six year old woman shouldn't have.