He was gazing at the hand she was extending to him. She could still feel the explosiveness just beneath the surface. For a moment, she thought that he’d ignore that silent plea.
Then he was moving toward her and his hand grasped her own. “Have it your way.” He pulled her into the foyer. “It seems you will anyway.” He turned on the foyer chandelier. “Luca would be very disappointed if he knew that no suffering is involved. I was over that long before the time I slammed that front door behind me.”
“Were you?” She was looking around the magnificent foyer. “This furniture is fantastic.” She went to the mirror and touched the shattered surface. “Pity. I would have thought this would have been repaired.”
“I broke it only recently.” He smiled crookedly. “I’ve been a bit preoccupied and haven’t had time to have a craftsman called in to do the work.”
She turned to look at him. “You broke it? How?”
His lips twisted. “I was a bit upset after I hung up on that first night I talked to you. I put my fist through it.”
“What?” She moved toward him. “Were you hurt? Why would you do something stupid like that?”
“Why are you surprised? I just did what was expected,” he said mockingly. “It’s what I do. I break things.”
She was looking at his hands and picked up his right fist. “It’s bruised but it seems to be healing. Did it bleed?”
“I don’t remember. I wasn’t paying any attention to it.” He was studying her expression curiously. “I suppose it did, but my body usually has an automatic heal response to any blood flow.”
“But you might have paid attention if you’d cut an artery?” she said crossly. “Stupid.”
“You’re upset about it.” His lips turned up at the corners. “Do you want to kiss it and make it better?”
“No way.” She took her duffel from him. “Now tell me where I can go to shower and change. I had to wear a blindfold for part of the way here and I felt as if I was smothering. And is there anything we can eat in this place?”
“Bread and cheese. Wine.” He gestured to the grand staircase. “The bedroom wing is on the second floor. Choose any room you want. There are dozens. They’re only cleaned every two weeks, so you might have to contend with a little dust.” He turned and opened the door. “You’ll be safe here. I’ll lock the door behind me, and anyone trying to enter will show up on my phone.”
She stopped on the stairs and looked down at him. “Where are you going?”
“You said that you were sure the place was watched. I’m going into the woods to see if you’re right. If it is, they’re new arrivals. I bunked out there last night.”
“You slept out there in the woods instead of one of those bedrooms you offered me?” She added dryly, “But Luca was wrong, and this place doesn’t bother you at all?” She started up the stairs. “I think you’re lying. We might have to do something about that…”
“Jane.”
She looked back down at him.
“You’re…different.” His eyes were narrowed on her face. “Why? I’ve never seen you like this. Did Luca frighten you that much?” He paused. “Did he hurt you?”
She wasn’t about to answer that last question. “Yes, he did frighten me,” she said. “And I am different. But I’m not going to talk about it right now. You’re on the edge and I don’t want you to get any more volatile. Later, Caleb.”
“But we will talk about it.” His lips were tight. “I’ll wait, but I have to know everything he did to you, Jane.”
“So that you can kill him? I thought that was already on your agenda anyway.”
“It is. And there are all kinds and degrees of pain before that happens.” His gaze was holding her own. “But that’s not what I’m talking about. I have to know so that I can try to make it right for you.”
She shook her head, puzzled. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“It doesn’t matter. Not right now.” He opened the door. “Call me if you need me.”
The door closed behind him. She heard the lock turn.
She hesitated an instant, gazing after Caleb. She wanted to go after him. She could sense the savagery that was driving him, and it was partly her fault. But there was no question that he would have gone on the hunt anyway—he’d wanted an excuse to get her out of here to safety. And her following him would only add to his distraction and danger.
She turned and started back up the stairs. She could not help him out there in those woods, but sometimes a hunt did not always take place in the wild…
Chapter
14
Jane was sitting on the third step of the grand staircase waiting for him when she heard Caleb unlock the door almost two hours later.
“It took you long enough,” she said as he swung open the door and came into the foyer. “Was I right? Did you run across any of Luca’s men? And if you did, are they still alive?”
“There wasn’t anyone in the woods, but I saw signs that they’d been there earlier. But there were two men in a speedboat on the lake in back of the property.” He shut the door. “And they are still alive because it would have taken me another hour or so to dispose of them. I didn’t want to leave you that long.” He frowned. “Why are you sitting on the steps? You could have gone into the sitting room and been more comfortable.”
She shook her head. “I decided that I didn’t like this place any more than you do. It’s all wonderful furniture and splendid tapestries and ostentation, but it’s…cold. And the only thing I was interested in about the place was you, and I couldn’t feel you here.” She shrugged. “After I finished dressing I went through all those bedrooms on the second floor, but I didn’t find any sign of you. Which one of them was yours when you were here?”
“None of them.” He smiled sardonically. “And, no, they didn’t keep me in the dungeon. I had a suite on the third floor where I didn’t have to be around my family. It was better for all of us.”
“Was it? I don’t think Lisa would agree.”
“Then she’d be wrong. She was always defending me and getting into trouble. The less she saw of me, the easier it was for her.”
“Or maybe it was more difficult because it made her feel helpless. I know what my reaction would have been if I’d been here. I wouldn’t have been able to take wandering around all those splendid, ornate rooms on the second floor when I knew what it meant. It meant that you would never be there.” Her glance shifted to the broken mirror. “So I came down here to sit and look at that mirror. Because I knew I’d feel you here. It’s part of the man you are.”
He smiled mockingly. “You mean all the violence and the ugliness?”
“No ugliness. Violence, yes. Pain, yes. Your pain. No one said you don’t make mistakes, and it hurts you as much as or more than it does people around you.” She met his eyes. “But you would have found a way to fix the mirror. You were already planning on it. Like you tried to fix Lisa by sending her away from you.”
“I told you that you were mistaken about her.”
She slowly shook her head. “You didn’t convince me. But I admit I’m interested in what you were going to do to make me right.”
His smile faded. “We have to talk.”
“Soon.” She got to her feet. “You promised me bread, cheese, and wine. Is there a scullery where I can find it?”
“No, there’s a very modern kitchen. My mother and father wouldn’t tolerate anything that reminded them of the Ridondo brothers who built this castle unless it increased their status.” He moved down the hall. “The wine is good because the maintenance people also harvest grapes from the vineyards and I allow them to take the profits as long as they leave several bottles on the property. The cheese is decent, but the bread may be completely stale depending on when the maids baked it for the workers.” He opened the door and threw it open. “I told you we should leave here.”
“And you know why we can’t. So stop growling and we’ll make the best of this.” She
smiled at him over her shoulder. “You’re so worried about keeping me safe. Stop it. You’re never worried about yourself.”
“I can’t lose you again.” He looked her in the eye. “I won’t do it.”
“No, you won’t.” She was no longer smiling. “Because you’ve already figured out a way to keep us together. Now we just have to figure out how to do it so no one gets hurt but Luca.” Her lips tightened. “I have no problem with Luca being hurt.” She shivered. “If you could have seen what he did to Tomas.”
“And what did he do to you?” Caleb asked.
She ignored him as she opened the bread box. “The rolls look a little stale, but not too bad.” She opened the refrigerator door. “The cheese looks good anyway…” She took it out of the refrigerator and looked for a cheese board. “How much of the plan you told Luca have you been able to initiate so far?”
“Only the research. I had to make certain I had you free first. I’ll contact MacDuff when I get you safely to MacDuff’s Run.”
She shook her head. “Safely? There you go again, Caleb. You can’t take me to the Run and leave me there. You have to do what you told Luca you’d do and use me in the robbery. Otherwise he’ll realize that it could be a trap. You know that as well as I do.”
He was silent. “I’ll find a way to do it.” Then as she continued to stare at him, he said harshly, “What the hell do you want me to do?”
“What you promised him. Whatever will keep Tomas alive and give us a chance to get Luca.” She cut into the cheese. “You’re a hunter. That shouldn’t be so hard for you.”
“Everything about this is hard for me,” he said between his teeth. “And it’s particularly hard to have you not letting me know what that son of a bitch did to you when it was probably all my fault.”
She looked up and then inhaled sharply as she saw his expression. “I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “I thought I could wait a while. I could see how angry you were and I didn’t want to stoke the flames. I’d forgotten that in this house you were told you were to blame for everything.” She threw her knife on the cheese board. “So I believe we’ll delay this snack for a while.” She took his hand and was pulling him back toward the door. “You want to talk, we’ll talk. But not here, Caleb.” She was half running down the hall toward the staircase. “I want to see that third-floor suite that was better for everyone. Will you take me there?”
“You seem to be taking me,” he said dryly as they started up the staircase. “Though I don’t know why you’re doing it. Why won’t you believe me when I tell you that I was never the victim Lisa told you I was?” He smiled sardonically. “Everyone knows I’m a throwback to the first Ridondos. Really, Jane. Do you think I couldn’t get the best of a little parental harassment?”
“I believe you could, but you chose not to do it. All your life you’ve had to make choices. And you were reckless and bitter and had all that power. It’s no wonder some of those choices weren’t exactly wonderful.” They’d reached the third floor, and she whirled to face him. “But some of them were wonderful. You saved Eve. You saved Joe. You saved Michael. You saved Lisa. You saved me. And there were so many other people you saved that we probably don’t even know about because you never wanted us to know it. That means something, and I’m not going to let you say it doesn’t. Now, where is that suite?”
He gestured down the hall. “By all means step into my parlor, but you’ll be disappointed. As I said, no dungeons at Fiero.”
“I won’t be disappointed.” She threw open the door and switched on the lights. “You’re never disappointed if you can accomplish a purpose.” She glanced around the room. “It’s what I expected.” It was a large room, and the furniture was as rich and well crafted as in all the other bedrooms: the velvet drapes, the large bed, the oak desk. The only difference was that the décor was spare and clean-lined, the colors dark blue and gray, and there were no paintings or tapestries. “You wouldn’t have left anything of yours behind that you cared about. When you walked out that door, you wanted it to be forever.”
“Very perceptive. But it was no loss when there was nothing here that I ever wanted to keep. May we go now?”
“Not yet.” She turned to face him. “Because no matter how hard you try, you can’t leave everything behind. You remember this room and everything that happened at Fiero.”
“Not really. I’m excellent at blocking.” His eyes were narrowed on her face. “Why the hell did you bring me here, Jane?”
“Because I’m not as good at blocking as you. If I have a bad memory, I have to put something in its place. And when you said that about you being to blame if Luca had hurt me, I kind of exploded.” She smiled unsteadily. “Because it reminded me how Lisa said that you were always held to blame when things went wrong. And I couldn’t have that happen to you again.”
“That was a long time ago. And, after all, it’s not as if I’m Michael, Jane.”
“No, Michael never had that happen to him. I hope he never does.” She took a deep breath. “Now be quiet and let me get this out. You are not responsible for anything that happened to me and you never will be. You want to know what happened to me at Tower House? I’ll tell you everything. Those few new bruises? I have them because I chose to make certain that Luca went along with your plan. Defying him always increases the ego factor and makes him more likely to do what I don’t want him to do. Rape? You probably thought of that first, because Luca told you what I said to him. I meant every word. Rape is terrible, but what happened to that child is worse. I couldn’t risk him losing his life if it meant I could stop it. But there was no rape. Luca was so angry with me that he didn’t want to look at me after you got through telling him how worthless I was to you. Though he did threaten to throw me to Alberto and his friends. But it turned out he was afraid they’d damage or kill me and spoil his chances if you changed your mind about me. You told me that you’d learn everything about him and his reactions and you did. So that part of your manipulations worked on him, too.”
“That close?” Caleb asked hoarsely. “No wonder you were frightened. It’s a wonder I didn’t get you killed.”
“Stop it.” She grabbed his arms. “None of this was your fault. I never thought that for a moment.”
“Then you’re deaf and blind,” he said harshly. “Luca reacted just the way I played him. I could have gone down another path, but I chose that one because the percentages were higher it would work.”
“And it did work.” She shook him. “Did you think I didn’t realize what you were doing? You’d studied him and you were able to gain the upper hand. You made the smart choice.”
“And left you there to take the punishment.” His eyes were glittering down at her. “Don’t lie to me. I know he hurt you.”
“I’ll never lie to you. He did hurt me. Do you want to see the bruises? But that was nothing. I’m here with you and I’ll forget it.” She released her grasp on his arms. “And I’d appreciate it if you’d forget it, too. Because that’s not what I intended when I brought you here.” She went to the switch and turned off the light. It was still twilight, and a dim golden haze suddenly pervaded the room. “I don’t want to think of Luca or your damn family or anything else but what I want you to do to me.” She came back to stand before him with hands clenched. “You said you thought I’d changed. You’re right. And, yes, it’s partly Luca’s fault because it was only when I was terrified of what he might do to you that I found out what was happening with me. I hadn’t realized before that I’d always been afraid of you.”
“I don’t know why it came as a surprise.” He smiled ironically. “I always knew that.”
“Well, I didn’t. Even when Lisa told me that was the only reason she could think of why I would leave you, I denied it.” She shook her head. “And you probably think it’s the reason everyone else is afraid of you. Because you’re the Hunter, the big, bad Ridondo throwback everybody dreaded. Bullshit. It’s because I was afraid to trust myself.” She took a step
closer. “When I came to you, I didn’t really know what I was doing. You had me so dizzy that I couldn’t sort out what I was feeling except for the sex and the fact that there was something there that I couldn’t let go.”
“Well, you did let go, didn’t you? I did everything I could to give you what everyone calls normal and it didn’t work. You still left me.” His lips tightened. “But I can’t let you go. I’ll just have to try something else.”
“Go ahead. Feel free. It might be interesting. I’m not afraid of anything you’d do to me. I can hold my own with you, Caleb.” She made a face. “Though why bother to get inventive? You’re not going to have that much trouble with me. As I said, I didn’t really know what I was doing before. All I could see was that it wasn’t going to be what Eve and Joe gave to each other. It kind of scared me, because I knew how good and wonderful they’d always been together. I didn’t realize until lately that we weren’t Eve and Joe and what we give to each other should be totally unique. But it also didn’t help that you were intimidating me because you were so damn complicated, and I knew that life was never going to be easy with you. So I blamed you and ran away. Just like everyone else.” She reached out and punched her finger at his chest. “But that’s over, I’m done running, and I can handle anything that comes along with you. Because I’m just as strong, and I have a few complications myself.”
He went still. “Just what are you saying, Jane?”
“Quite a lot. I can’t blame you if you can’t make heads or tails of it. And it’s only the beginning, and I’ll require you to listen to much more in the future. Not now.” She stepped back and began to unbutton her blouse. “It’s time to make some new memories in this damn room. I told you I wasn’t good at blocking.” Her blouse and bra dropped to the floor. “I just have to tell you one more thing.” She stepped closer and laid her head on his chest. She could hear his heartbeat beneath her ear. “Now I know what that something was that I didn’t want to let go. I want to say it. My choice. Because I’m not even sure you’ll believe it. I screwed up and it may take a while for me to work this out. Don’t think that you have to make any commitment.” She said quietly, “I love you, Seth Caleb. I will always love you, and I’ll trust you, and be there for you.”