Page 23

The Hawk: A Highland Guard Novel Page 23

by Monica McCarty


“Let him go, Hawk.”

Boyd’s calm voice broke through the haze. Slowly, Erik’s mind cleared and, realizing he was about to strangle the king’s brother, he released his hold on Edward’s neck.

Edward bent over at the waist, with his hands around his neck, gasping for air. “What the hell do you think you were doing?” he accused, red-faced and spitting angry. “How dare you put your hands on me. My brother will hear about this.”

That was exactly Edward Bruce’s problem. He’d never learned to live out of the shadow of his much greater brother. He was a crude, arrogant bastard who thought his nobility gave him the excuse to say and do whatever he wanted. Usually Erik ignored him. But when Edward had mentioned Ellie …

All he could think about was killing him. That Edward had been able to provoke such a reaction was disconcerting. It was nothing Erik hadn’t said before—albeit less crudely. In fact, not long ago, he’d made a similar jest to MacLeod about his new bride and nearly had his head lopped off by his decidedly unamused friend. It was the first time Erik had realized just how besotted MacLeod was with his wife.

But that situation was nothing like this one.

He peered over at Edward. “Do what you need to do, Number Two.” Edward’s eyes flared even redder at the name Erik had jokingly coined for him a few months back—ostensibly a reference to his birth position, but just as much a reflection of his always coming second to his much admired brother. Edward stormed out of the cave, and Erik sat back down on the rock that he’d so swiftly vacated.

He felt Boyd’s gaze studying him. For a vicious brute, he was annoyingly perceptive. “So that’s what it looks like when you get angry? Chief mentioned something, but I’ll admit I didn’t believe him.”

Erik took a deep drink of ale, wondering why he felt like a bug under a damned rock.

Boyd gave a soft whistle. “She must be some woman. You’ve just made yourself one hell of a powerful enemy.”

“It had nothing to do with her. Edward’s an arse. That’s been a long time coming.” It was true, but it still didn’t explain Erik’s reaction.

Boyd studied him a little longer and then, thankfully, changed the subject.

The cold night air numbed her cheeks as Ellie peered out the small window into the darkness. She could see little beyond the circles of light cast from the torches positioned on either side of the entry of Meg’s longhouse.

Where was he? Hawk had said he would see her tonight, but instead he’d sent word that he would be eating at camp with his men and asked for Thomas to join him as soon as possible.

Ellie had seen the two men arguing earlier and feared that his absence had something to do with her. She bit her lip, suspecting that Thomas had seen her leaving the barn. What must he think? Her chest squeezed. Exactly what she deserved: that she was a wanton.

She gnawed her lip a little more anxiously, watching for any sign of that tall, muscular physique. But she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

“Looking for someone?”

Ellie quickly closed the shutter and turned around to face an amused Meg. She shook her head. “I was just admiring the full moon.”

Meg gave her a smile, too kind to challenge her lie. “I wouldn’t worry. I’m sure he’s merely lost track of time. If Hawk told you he’d be here, he will. For all that devil-may-care bluster of his, he’s one of the most dependable people I know. You can count on him.”

It was odd but true. Ellie blushed. “It’s not like that.”

Meg smiled. “I think it’s exactly like that.” Her eyes twinkled. “It wasn’t so long ago that I was watching out the window for my Colin.” She sighed. “Ah, the first blush of love.”

Ellie startled. “I’m not in love,” she protested, forgetting the silly story Hawk had concocted. She knew Meg well enough now, however, to suspect that she’d never believed it anyway.

Ellie couldn’t be in love. Horror washed over her. The air suddenly felt heavy and smothering. She couldn’t be so foolish as to lose her heart to a man with whom there was no chance of a future. Who would only break her heart.

Meg acted as if she hadn’t spoken. She shook her head woefully. “I never thought I’d see the day Hawk had his wings clipped.”

Ellie’s heart stopped, then started again in a rapid flurry. “What do you mean?”

“He doesn’t know it yet, but that man is in love with you.”

Ellie’s heart was beating so hard it hurt. Meg was wrong; she had to be wrong. “Didn’t you just warn me that he loved women too much to ever give his heart to one?”

Meg shrugged as if her words no longer mattered. “I’ve seen Hawk with many women, and I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he does you.”

Ellie’s mind was having a hard time controlling the almost desperate yearnings of her heart. Maybe it hadn’t all been her imagination. Could Meg be right?

Ellie forced herself to be rational. “It doesn’t matter. Even if it were true, he means to return me to my family as soon as we leave.”

Meg took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Give him time, lass. Things are complicated right now, and Hawk isn’t the type of man to come to his feelings willingly. He might need a little pushing, but eventually he’ll get there.”

The maelstrom of emotion tossing inside her for the past few days threatened to unleash. Tears stung the back of her eyes and throat. Ellie gazed up into the kind eyes of the woman who’d become her friend. The urge to confide in someone was overpowering. “I don’t have time,” she whispered.

Meg’s brows knit together. “Are you married?”

Ellie shook her head. “Not yet. But I’m betrothed.”

A broad smile cleared the worry from Meg’s face. “Then there is still time. You’ll just have to push a little harder.”

Meg made it sound so simple, though it was anything but. Even if she were convinced of Hawk’s feelings—which she wasn’t—there was the betrothal contract to consider. How would her father react if she asked to break the contract? For a woman of her rank and position, personal feelings weren’t supposed to matter. She was expected to do her duty. As it hadn’t occurred to her to tell her father her feelings, she had no idea what his reaction would be.

There was also Ralph and King Edward’s reactions to consider. Though Ralph did not seem to have feelings for her, he could be angry. But given the circumstances of his first marriage, perhaps he’d understand. King Edward’s reaction was impossible to guess.

Her father cared for her, and something made her believe he would not force her into a marriage she did not want. But that didn’t mean he would welcome a pirate for a son-in-law.

She knew there was another alternative. She could always run away with him and risk her family disowning her. But to a girl who’d always tried to do the right thing, who believed in duty and responsibility, who loved her family with all her heart, it seemed almost unthinkable to contemplate. It was something Matty would do—not she. She wasn’t impetuous, she was serious and …

Boring. Doomed to live a life that she didn’t want—with a man she didn’t want.

“Does Hawk know about the betrothal?” Meg asked.

Ellie shook her head. “I don’t think it would matter to him. He’s made it clear that our … uh, relationship is temporary.”

Meg harrumphed. “There is a big difference between what men say and what they feel. You’ll never know how he’ll react unless you tell him.” Meg must have read the indecision on her face. “If you are sure that is what you want.”

Ellie wasn’t sure of anything. But if there was some chance that Meg could be right, she had to find out. And she didn’t have much time to do so.

Meg gave her an odd smile. “I was just about to go to camp to retrieve the cooking pots I sent down earlier.”

Ellie frowned, not catching on right away. “Didn’t Duncan say not to bother, that he would bring them back himself?”

Meg put her hands on her hips.
“Well, as Duncan hasn’t seen fit to do so, I intend to fetch them myself.”

Ellie smiled. “Could you use a little help?”

“Why how thoughtful of you,” Meg said, as if the idea had never occurred to her. “I certainly could.”

The two women shared a conspiratorial smile and gathered their cloaks. The wind had picked up, and the torch flickered in the darkness as they carefully wound their way down the cliffside trail to the beach. Ellie had the feeling they were being watched and realized Hawk probably had guardsmen stationed around the perimeter of the cave. But it wasn’t until they neared the entrance that a young guardsman stopped them.

“I’m afraid the captain is busy right now,” he said, twitching and shuffling as if his clothing was too tight.

Ellie could hear the sounds of merriment coming from within the cave. Busy what, celebrating? Her stomach dropped, thinking of the women from the other night. She attempted to peer over the guardsman’s shoulder, but the lad was tall and his chest blocked a good portion of the entrance.

Meg also looked puzzled. “I’ve just come to retrieve the cooking pots.”

“I’ll have Rhuairi get them for you.” He motioned to a nearby guard, who cast him a furtive look and hastily did his bidding.

Something strange was going on. They’d never been refused entrance to the cave before, and it was clear the young guardsman was anxious to be rid of them. Was there something he didn’t want them to see?

Meg must have realized it as well. She took Ellie’s arm in hers. “That’s all right. Have Duncan bring them up later.”

Meg turned them around to head back to the cottage, but in her haste caused Ellie to bump into a man who’d come up behind them.

“Pardon me,” she said automatically.

Ellie glanced up at the man and froze with shock. The blood drained from her face. She blinked in the semidarkness, not trusting her eyes. He was dressed in the rough clothing of a fisherman, but she recognized the handsome, dark-haired man before her: Edward Bruce. Robert’s eldest brother and her brother by marriage.

Why …?

Of course! In that one frozen heartbeat everything suddenly became clear. The final piece of the puzzle snapped into place. Hawk is with Bruce. He wasn’t a pirate, he was a Scottish rebel, fighting with Robert against King Edward. Against her father. The wish for her to avoid her father’s men in the cave suddenly made sense.

This was what Meg meant by complicated. But her friend could never have imagined just how complicated.

Then, the second realization struck: Hawk was going to discover who she was. It would all be over. Once he discovered her identity, there would be no more private moments, no more kisses, no more pleasure. She would never have a chance to find out how he truly felt about her.

Originally, she’d feared that revealing her identity would make him wish to marry her only because of her wealth and position. But now there was also the fact that she was his liege lord’s sister by marriage to add to the mix. She suspected that innate noble streak of his would force him to offer for her.

But she didn’t want him like that. The possibility of a future like her mother’s cured her of any such thoughts. There was nothing romantic about unrequited love. She’d rather be married to Ralph.

She held her breath, waiting for the moment of revelation. Waiting for Edward’s voice to cry out, demanding to know why Lady Elyne de Burgh was standing before him gowned like a peasant.

But Edward didn’t say a word. His cold, dark eyes passed over her without a flicker of interest, just as he’d done the first time they’d met at Robert and Elizabeth’s wedding. Bedecked in jewels and gowned in rich velvets, she wasn’t pretty enough for him to notice then, and she certainly wasn’t now.

My God, he didn’t recognize her! She knew she should be humiliated, but instead she couldn’t believe her luck.

Not wanting to give him a chance to remember, she turned to leave. But before she could grab Meg’s arm and hasten away, an achingly familiar voice stopped her.

Hawk grabbed her elbow to whip her around. “Ellie? What the hell are you doing here?”

Edward Bruce’s gaze sharpened on her, taking her in with far more scrutiny than she wanted. “This is your captive?”

Ellie got the impression she wasn’t at all what he was expecting.

“I’m not his captive.”

“She’s not my captive,” Hawk said at the same time.

Edward was scrutinizing her with an intensity that made her uneasy. For a moment Ellie feared that he recognized her. A mocking smile turned one corner of his mouth.

Finally, he turned his gaze from her. “She’s not your usual type, Hawk.”

Erik was having a hard time reminding himself that this was the king’s brother and that putting his fist through that snide smile of his probably wasn’t the best idea.

But damn, it would feel good.

First, Edward had foolishly allowed himself to be seen by the two women, and, although slim, there was always a chance someone could recognize him. And then he’d gone and insulted Ellie by comparing her to other women.

Why shouldn’t he be attracted to Ellie? So what if she didn’t have big breasts and look as if she’d just alighted from Mount Olympus. Any fool could see how pretty she was, with her big green-flecked hazel eyes, tiny nose, and that smart little mouth of hers.

If that bastard had hurt her feelings, his royal connections weren’t going to save him. He glanced over at Ellie. From the sharp thrust of her chin and the two high spots of color on her cheeks, she’d obviously understood the implication—and, by the looks of it, was about to give Edward Bruce an earful.

Erik should have anticipated her reaction. Ellie did not base her worth—or anyone else’s—on physical beauty. It was one of the things he admired about her, and why her good opinion mattered.

But he didn’t want her near Edward Bruce any longer than was necessary. “You’re right,” he said, stepping between her and Edward. “Ellie is too unique to be compared to anyone else.”

He frowned, realizing he meant it.

Ellie was watching him with that too-observant look of hers that made him feel like fidgeting. Not wanting her to be confused by his words and jump to any erroneous conclusions, he went on the offensive. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s my fault,” Meg intervened. “I didn’t realize you were busy. We came down to collect the cooking pots.”

Erik was glad to see that Edward had realized—belatedly—that he shouldn’t have shown himself and had gone back into the cave.

Ellie watched him go, and something in her expression gave Erik a prickle of unease.

“I’ll have one of the men bring them up,” he said. He could see Meg was feeling bad for having interrupted them. It wasn’t her fault; he should have been more explicit in his orders. He wondered what had really brought them here. He didn’t believe they’d really come for cooking pots.

“It’s late,” he said. “Why don’t I walk you home.”

They both protested, but Erik would hear none of it. Meg might be used to walking along the cliffside at night, but Ellie wasn’t. When he thought of how easily she could have slipped or taken a misstep in the darkness, it made him angry all over again.

Just to make sure, he kept a firm hand on her arm as he walked them up the path. Ellie might be slim, but she sure did tuck in nicely against him.

Both women were unusually quiet, and no sooner had they walked through the door than Meg yawned dramatically and excused herself for bed.

Erik had the distinct feeling it was intentionally done to leave him alone with Ellie. But Ellie seemed unusually anxious. She took an inordinate amount of time removing her cloak, and then bustled around the room until she finally decided to warm her hands before the fire.

“Was there something you wanted, lass?”

“Nay,” she said quickly, then amended, “Yes.” She folded her hands in her skirts and turned to face him. “Yo
ur guests. Is that why you didn’t come tonight?”

Damn. He’d forgotten. Perhaps that wasn’t quite true. Randolph’s words were weighing on him more than he wanted to acknowledge. “Aye, I’m sorry,” he smiled, “but business before pleasure.”

His attempt at lightheartedness, however, was utterly undone by her next words. “You aren’t a pirate, you’re with Bruce. That’s why the English are after you.”

He laughed as if she’d just made a joke, though inside he was furious. She must have recognized Edward Bruce. “Still inventing noble activities for me, Ellie? I thought you were going to leave the tale-telling to me.”

“Don’t,” she said softly. “Don’t joke about something like this.” Her eyes fixed on his. “Don’t lie to me.”

He should. He should turn his back and walk away. It was already too complicated. But he couldn’t force his feet to move. He didn’t want to lie to her. “It’s safer for you if you don’t ask questions.”

“I don’t care about being safe. I want to know the truth. Why else would the king’s brother be here?”

“Damn it, Ellie, I care!” He dragged his fingers through his shorn hair, trying to get a rein on his frazzled emotions. Couldn’t she see that he was trying to protect her? “Do you know what they would do to you if they thought you knew anything? King Edward will stop at nothing to find Bruce. Do not let the fact that you are a woman make you think that you are safe.”

The vehemence of his reaction didn’t seem to have any effect on her. “The queen.” She stepped forward anxiously. “What news do you have of Queen Elizabeth?”

He frowned at the strange intensity of her question, until he recalled her position in Ulster’s household. “None since she parted from the king a few months ago.”

“I’ve heard rumors that she’s gone to Norway. To take refuge with Bruce’s sister, the queen.”

He shook his head. “I don’t know.”

He could see her disappointment and wondered if despite her position in Ulster’s household she was sympathetic to Bruce. With Bruce’s connections to Ireland, he would not be surprised. But it didn’t matter. Sympathetic or not, Erik had a price on his head and any connection with him was too dangerous.