“I… I did not know you were here,” she stammered. Then the most truthful question of the night came forth. “How did you find me?”
Jax just stared at her, thinking she was still a pretty little thing but that she had aged quickly over the past four years. Oddly enough, he felt no anger or sense of possessiveness. But he did realize that, as of this moment, both he and Mira had a giant, common problem. He needed to get her alone to discuss it.
“It was not too difficult,” he said. “Someone told me you would be here.”
Mira was trembling; Jax could see it. He sat back down at the table and indicated for her to do the same. “Sit, sister. We’ve not seen each other in years. There is much to talk about.”
Edward helped his wife to sit; his attentions toward her were kind and loving. Even Jax could see that. Then he pulled up a chair of his own but Mira stopped him.
“Edward,” she said quickly, holding a hand over the chair to prevent him from sitting. “Johnny was very restless when I left him. Would you mind checking on him while I speak to my… brother?”
Edward nodded eagerly. “Of course, my love. I will be right back.”
Jax and Mira sat in silence until the slender young man left back through the alley door. When Jax finally looked at the woman, she was staring back at him fearfully.
“Please do not kill me, Jax,” she begged softly. “I am sorry if I shamed you and I am sorry if this is a horrendous shock to you, but you must understand that….”
Jax cut her off with a raised hand. “I am not here to exact revenge, Mira,” he said quietly. “In fact, I am rather relieved to see that you are alive.”
The expression on her pasty face changed slightly. “Why?”
“Because I thought you were dead.”
Mira did not quite know what to say to that. “Why did you come looking for me?” she suddenly went into panic mode again. “If you think I am going to return with you, know right now that I will not. I will never go back to you. I would rather…”
He cut her off for a second time. “I’ve not come to bring you back nor have I come to kill you,” he sat forward on the table, folding his enormous hands patiently. “Mira, I came because I thought Amadeo had killed you and I had come to seek some manner of peace with the situation. I should have done it four years ago but I suppose it took me that long to discover what an ignorant husband I had been. In any case, before he died, Amadeo mentioned Bridge Terrace and Blankenship. I knew there was a bridge wharf in Berwick, so I came to Bridge Terrace and, by chance, found this place. Believe me when I tell you that it was purely by chance. I came on Amadeo’s clues but honestly had no idea what I would find.”
Mira gazed at him a long time, digesting what he had told her. But knowing de Velt as she had, she could hardly believe he hadn’t come to punish her. Along with her fear, however, she also felt betrayed.
“He promised he would not tell you,” she finally said, her eyes welling. “He swore to me that he would never tell you what happened.”
Jax was starting to feel some confusion again, now about Amadeo’s part in all of this. “Would you please tell me what happened? I promise I will not become angry, but I would like to know the truth.”
Mira’s breathing began to come in strange little pants. She fidgeted a bit, wiping at her eyes, glancing at Jax every so often. She finally sat on her hands in a nervous gesture, struggling with her composure.
“You swear that you will not kill me?”
“I swear.”
She took a deep breath. “Then if that is true, you are not the husband I left.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “I am most certainly not the husband you left. Tell me the truth, Mira. What happened? Why are you here?”
She took another deep breath; she did not want to anger him by refusing, so she summoned her courage.
“I met Edward on a shopping trip when you and I lived at Foulburn,” she said softly, haltingly. “In two minutes the man made me feel more comfort and joy than you gave me in two years. I… I told him that I was not married. I truly wished that I was not and as time passed and the more I conversed with him, it was easy to pretend that I was not. He wanted to marry me and I wanted to marry him, so I planned my escape from Foulburn one night and Amadeo caught me. He made me tell him where I was going. When I did, he offered to escort me there. He swore that he would never tell you what had happened.”
Jax kept his composure remarkably well; his face never changed expression. But he could see that he had been horribly wrong about Amadeo in a most important way; still, the man had been conspiring behind his back. It was not the first time and it certainly was not the last. His only regret was that Amadeo did not tell him that Mira was still alive on the day of that fateful battle. It would have perhaps made a difference in the outcome.
“Amadeo wanted you out of the way,” he said quietly. “That is why he escorted you to Berwick and left you off to a new life. He did not want you near me, distracting me, and interrupting my plans of conquest.” Just as he had tried to rid me of Kellington.
Mira had not been privy to all that went on in Jax’s world, but she knew enough to know that Amadeo had been a schemer. “None of the other knights liked him, Jax. Surely you know that. He tried to separate everyone from you.”
Jax nodded slowly. “I am aware. But he is no longer a concern.”
Mara stared at him a moment. “You killed him?”
Jax met her gaze, his silence enough of a confirmation. After a moment, he continued. “So you came to a new life and a new husband. And you never thought that I would find you?”
She shook her head. “I prayed every night that you would not.” She began to relax, realizing that he was indeed not out to punish her. The Jax de Velt she knew four years ago would have decapitated her by now. “Jax, you and I were strangers when we married. We were not happy. We resented each other. I suppose I was resigned to that until I met Edward. Then I realized that I deserve to be happy, too. I did not flee to hurt you, you must believe me; I left because it was the best thing to do.”
Jax sighed faintly, nodding his head after a moment. “Are you truly happy, then? This is not the life of wealth you once said you wanted.”
She grinned. “I am richer than you in many accounts. I have a husband I adore and two beautiful sons. We work hard here, but I love every minute of it. It is a much better life than you and I had together.”
“Then I cannot fault you. But you realize, of course, that you and I are still married. Your marriage to Edward is null.”
Her smile faded. “I know,” she murmured. “But he will never know the truth. In our hearts, we are more deeply husband and wife than any blessing the church could give us.”
Jax sat back in his seat, toying with the empty cup at his elbow. “Then I have a confession as well. Thinking you were dead, I married another. I, too, adore her. She is my all for living. But she will never know that our marriage is invalid. It does not matter in the least to me; as you said, we are more deeply married in our hearts than anything the church could ever validate.”
Mira looked surprised. “You married for love?”
“I did.”
Her mouth flew open in awe, then joy. “My God, I never thought I would hear that from you,” she breathed. “You are Jax de Velt, the most fearsome warlord in the land. You know nothing of mercy or compassion or emotion, yet you say you have married for love? ’Tis a miracle.”
The corners of his mouth twitched, feeling her mirth but unwilling to give in to it totally. His thoughts were increasingly lingering on Kellington, still asleep in an inn a half mile away. He missed her very much.
“The miracle was in finding my wife.”
Mira shook her head. “You do not mean me.”
He did smile, then. “You are not my wife.”
Her own smile returned. “And you are most certainly not my husband.”
The back door from the alley opened and Jax eyed the slender young man entering
. “Nay,” he said quietly. “I am your brother. And I believe the time for me to leave has come.”
He stood up just as Edward reached the table. The young innkeeper looked concerned. “Please do not get up on my account,” he pulled his chair up again. “Sit, sit. Let us become better acquainted.”
Jax shook his head. “Alas, I cannot. I have left my wife overlong and must return. I simply came to check on my sister to make sure she is well.”
Mira stood up and put her arm around her husband’s waist. “I am very well. And it was nice of you to come.”
Jax lifted an eyebrow, his gaze lingering on her. The woman was a grown-up version of the girl he had known four years ago. He felt strangely at peace with the thought as his gaze moved to Edward.
The young innkeeper smiled. “I am sorry you must leave,” he said. “I was hoping to come to know you. I have no family other than my wife and our children and was hoping to know a brother.”
Jax could see that he was a very nice, polite man. He’d sensed that from the onset. Two months ago he would not have given a whelp like Edward any thought. He would have run him through as he had done countless others, without thought or conscience. But he actually thought the man rather pleasant. Strange, he thought to himself. Perhaps he was growing more human by the moment. Perhaps Kellington had given him more of herself than he had ever imagined. Perhaps this was what it meant to be a true man.
“Perhaps another time,” he said to Edward. “Perhaps I will return another day to see how my sister is faring.”
Mira reached out to grasp his hand before he could move away completely. “Will you bring your wife?” she asked. “I… I believe I would like to meet this remarkable woman.”
Jax’s mouth twitched with a smile. “She is indeed remarkable, as I am living proof.”
With that, he turned for the door, making his way through the small main room and out into the night beyond. Mira and Edward stood a moment, watching his massive form fade into the black street beyond the door. When the panel closed behind him, Edward turned to his wife.
“He seems like a pleasant man,” he said, putting his arms around her. “I cannot believe he is the blood thirsty bastard you told me he was.”
Mira’s gaze moved from her husband’s face back to the closed door, the last place she ever saw Jax de Velt. She imagined she could still see him there, an enormous man with dual colored eyes and a terrifying reputation.
“He’s apparently not,” she murmured. “Not anymore.”
EPILOGUE
July, 1181 A.D.
It was a warm summer day as Kellington walked the orchards to the east of Pelinom. Her attention was on the trees laden with cherries, mentally estimating the coming harvest. With the warm weather following the late June rains, it promised to be a bountiful haul.
The fat cook of Pelinom followed her, jabbering about the quality of the fruits. The servant girl Matilda brought up the rear, carrying with her a fat golden-eyed infant with wispy dark hair. Every so often, Kellington would glance back at the baby, making faces at her son and smiling when he grinned his toothless grin at her. After listening to the cook prattle on for an hour, she’d finally had enough talk of cherries and the weather and retrieved her son from Matilda’s arms.
He was a deliciously fat and gorgeous baby, and she kissed his little cheeks before settling him into the crook of her elbow. At four months of age, Cole de Velt was easily twice his birth weight and gaining quickly. His father was so proud of him that the man could hardly contain himself. There had been many a night when Kellington would just sit and watch Jax as he held his son, the expression on his face enough to bring tears to her eyes. For a man who had known virtually no emotion his entire life, the transformation from deadly warrior to loving father was nothing short of astonishing.
It was the baby’s father that Kellington was missing today. The cook continued to talk as Kellington’s golden brown gaze moved to the east, inspecting the horizon in the distance for any sign of the returning army. Jax was supposed to have been home a week ago. Though Kellington tried not to worry, it was difficult. Her anxiety came in waves. So she lost herself in the functions of Pelinom, tallying the coming harvest and administering the fortress. But most of her time was spent with the baby in her arms, a lad with his father’s strong features and his mother’s lovely eyes. Every time she looked into his little face, she saw the very best qualities of Jax. But it also made her miss him that much more.
Reluctantly turning from the eastern horizon, she settled herself on the blanket that Matilda had spread on the grass beneath the cherry trees. It was a lovely summer day and they had come prepared to enjoy it. The servant and the cook had packed enough food for several people and began to pull loaves of bread and hunks of cheese from baskets. Kellington ate a few bites of cheese and had a few sips of wine. When Cole grew fussy, she loosened the bodice of her gown and put him on the breast. She nursed him until his eyes grew droopy and he faded off to sleep.
She lay the baby down on the shady part of the blanket, covering him with a little wrap that Matilda had made. In the lazy warmth of the afternoon, she lay down beside her son and in little time was dozing just as he was. He still did not sleep through the night and she often napped during the day right along with him. She had no idea how long she had been drifting in and out of sleep when a deep, familiar voice suddenly invaded her mind.
Kellington thought she heard her name. Suddenly, a massive, warm hand was stroking her hair and someone kissed her gently on the cheek. With a deep sigh, her eyes lolled open and she found herself gazing up into her husband’s smiling face.
It took her a moment to realize that she wasn’t dreaming. With a start, she sat up and nearly smashed him in the nose. Jax laughed low in his throat as she threw her arms around his neck.
“Jax,” she gasped. “You’ve returned.”
He held her tightly, lowering himself down onto the blanket and trying not to disturb his son. “Indeed I have,” his mouth was against her ear. “And I find you lounging in the orchards. Isn’t there a harvest to be planned?”
She pulled back, her arms still around his neck as she looked him in the eye. “It is already seen to, my lord,” she said. “I have several workers returning from Hadden in two days, so we should make short work of this.”
He was still smiling at her, drinking in the sight of her lovely face. “Efficient as always, Lady de Velt. Now, tell me; have you and my son been well these past few weeks?”
She nodded. “Very well, the both of us.” Her smile faded somewhat. “And you? How was your trip to Alnwick?”
Jax’s smile faded as he shifted her in his arms so that he could look at his sleeping son. “Well enough,” he admitted. “The baron and I had a very long, very drawn out talk. Days and days’ worth of discussions that were boring, frustrating and just plain long. The man is a master of negotiations, though I am still learning somewhat. I’ve not had the practice he has had.”
She struggled not to grin. “Why negotiate when you can simply lay siege and take it?”
“Exactly.” He eyed her with irritation before continuing. “Some days I think that my way was indeed the better way. Nonetheless, I believe we have both come out satisfied.”
“And how is that?”
“Well,” Jax scratched his chin thoughtfully. “When all was said and done and the dust cleared, it would seem that I am retaining possession of Pelinom and Foulburn while the baron is regaining possession of White Crag and Norham.”
Kellington’s eyebrows lifted. “Is that so? My goodness; I thought for sure de Vesci wanted everything back. You had agreed to that, once.”
Jax nodded. “I did. But the baron is under the impression that it is better to be at the right hand of the Devil than in his path; therefore, he has agreed to allow me to keep two of the castles with the agreement that I return the other two. I have also agreed to station men at Norham and White Crag in order to protect this stretch of the border from the S
cots. That stipulation was in exchange for me keeping Foulburn.”
She smiled at him. “Part of the baron’s masterful negotiations.”
“No doubt. He knew he wanted something from me and was willing to give me what I wanted in order to get it.”
“So now you serve Northumberland.”
“Something like that.”
It was as good of an outcome as she could have imagined. Fifteen months of uncertainty had finally come to a conclusion and she realized she was very relieved, and very pleased. Jax had not let her accompany him to Alnwick because he wanted her to stay with their son, but she had worried over how he would behave without her calming presence. She felt foolish that she had worried so; the man had changed dramatically over the past several months. She was still growing accustomed to it.
“I am very pleased to hear that everything has worked out,” she said, glancing over at Cole when the baby fidgeted. It reminded her of something else at Alnwick that she’d not yet asked her husband about. “And Lavaine? Did you see her?”
Jax nodded. “She is due to give birth any day. Denedor is nearly beside himself; you know that his first wife perished in childbirth.”
Kellington nodded. “I do indeed. How does she feel?”
Jax shrugged, noticing there was an open basket with food in it and he began rummaging about. “I did not ask. Every time she saw me, she burst into tears, so I tried to stay away from her.”
“But why did she cry?” Kellington wanted to know. Then she frowned. “You did not do anything to frighten her, did you?”
Jax shook his head, looking over at his half-awake son. “Nay, nothing to frightened her,” he reached out to touch the tufts of dark hair sticking up above the blanket. “But I did apologize to her.”