“I like it when you call me your wife,” she admitted.
“It’s funny how often I found myself thinking of you as such. Never Katharine or Katy, but my wife. I liked the way it sounded, although I never questioned why.” I snorted. “Too stupid to realize how I felt about you, even in my own head.”
“Or too scared.”
The air caught in my throat. As usual, she hit the nail on the head. I had been too scared to admit what I was feeling. To admit an idea I had my entire life was wrong.
“I’m not scared of loving you anymore, Katy. I’m only scared of losing you.”
She curled herself into me, resting her head on my shoulder. I cradled her close, stroking through her hair in long passes.
“I’m here,” she whispered. “You found me.”
“Thank God.”
I set down my plate on the old coffee table, my gaze on Katy. The firelight played over her face, the flames casting a red glow around her head. She pulled her legs to her chest, chin resting on them as she stared into space. She hadn’t eaten much, but she did finish the toast. I polished off all the eggs and ate both her apples. We’d replace them, and more, in the morning. For now, though, I needed to find out how she wanted to proceed together on the road ahead of us.
“What would you like to do, Katy?”
She turned her face toward me. “Hmmm?”
I ran my knuckles down her cheek. “Tomorrow. The next day. The one after. Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“I don’t know.”
“How long did you want to stay here? Or do you want to go home?” A sudden tightness enveloped my torso, making me breathless. “Are you coming home?”
She slipped her hand into mine, one word easing my worry. “Yes.”
“Okay. Good. When?”
“Can we stay here for a few days? Or if you have to get back, I’ll follow you then?”
I shook my head. “I’m not leaving here without you. If you want to stay, we can. I’ll bring you back in the summer, too.”
“The cottages won’t be here in the summer.”
“Why?”
“Scott passed away last year. His son, Bill, is selling the land. After speaking with him, I gathered whoever buys it will tear down all the cottages and develop something new and modern.” She looked around the room, her eyes drinking in memories. “He told me business has been poor, but it’s a good time to sell because of the location. The land is worth a lot of money. It’s a good opportunity for his family.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know this place is special to you.”
She smiled, rubbing her cheek on my hand. “I have my memories. I’m grateful Bill let me come back one last time.” She sighed, the sound low and sad. “I have one more good memory to add.”
“We can make our own memories, together. New ones.”
She nodded.
“Do you want me to buy this place for you?” I searched her eyes. “I can afford it,” I added. “If you want me to, I will.”
“No! No, Richard. You don’t have to buy an entire resort for me. What on earth would I do with it?”
“If it made you happy, I would. We’d figure something out. It’s probably a good investment. We could rebuild it, including a bright blue cottage with white shutters just for you.”
She leaned forward, teary-eyed and kissed the corner of my mouth. “Thank you, my darling, but no. The fact you would offer means more than I can say.”
“Okay. If you change your mind, let me know.”
“I’ll do that.”
I reclined back on the sofa, looking around the room, an idea forming in my head. I would have to see if I could arrange it. I tugged on Katy’s legs, bringing them onto my lap.
“We’re going to have a lot of questions to answer when we get back.”
“I know.” She drew in a deep breath. “Do you think they’ll ever forgive us?”
I was honest. “I don’t know.”
Graham had been more than fair after our talk. However, I knew it wasn’t over. Once I had figured out her whereabouts, I wasted no time throwing a few things into a bag and heading for the car to arrive before dark. I had called him prior to leaving, telling him I knew where Katy was and I was going to find her. He had been encouraging and wished me luck.
“I hope you find your happiness, Richard. Believe you deserve it and hold on to it.”
“Thank you.”
“Call me when you get back. We’ll talk.”
“I will. Thank you, Graham.”
No other words had been spoken and no reminder of a job waiting. I had no idea what the future held for my career. All I knew right now was that Katy was my future. That was enough.
“I may not have a job, Katy.”
“What will you do?”
“We”—I stressed the word—“we may have to move. I can put out feelers in Toronto or Calgary, maybe Vancouver.”
She nodded, playing with my fingers. She kept turning my wedding band around, twisting it nervously.
“Will you go with me?”
Her head shot up and she met my gaze. “I’ll go anywhere with you, Richard.”
“Okay, then. We’ll figure it out, together.”
“What if we don’t have to?”
“I’d be ecstatic. I like working for Graham. I enjoy the positive energy and the teamwork.” I barked out a laugh. “I’m even fond of that dynamo they call Jenna.”
“I think you’re fond of them all.”
“I am. It’s what I want, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to earn Graham’s trust back. As long as he gives me the chance to do so, we’ll stay. If not, we’ll have to move on.”
“Okay.”
“It’s as simple as that for you? After everything, you’ll pack up and follow me?”
She rested her head on the sofa. “I love you, Richard. If you have to leave, then so do I. The past is just that now—the past. Like the contract you burned, it’s gone. I don’t want to dwell on it or keep throwing it in your face. That’s not how love works. It’s not how I work.”
In a second, I had yanked her on my lap and was kissing her with all the emotion I felt. Every thought and new sensation went into my kiss. Love, want, desire, relief of having found her—and an emotion I had never known—joy. Joy she was here, joy she returned my love, and joy for the future, because the future contained my Katy.
I tilted her head, needing her closer, wanting more of her in every way. My arms locked around her, molding her softness to my hard body. I slipped my hands up her shirt, pressing against the smooth expanse of her back, groaning with desire.
“Please, baby,” I begged, needing more.
“Bed,” she whispered against my mouth. “Take me to bed, Richard.”
I stood up, holding her. I didn’t need to be told twice.
The bed was old and it creaked. The headboard ricocheted off the wall repeatedly as I took her, the sheets bunching around our bodies from our frenzied coupling. None of it mattered.
Before we hit the mattress, I tore off her shirt, yanking her pants away, leaving her bare to my thirsty gaze. I ran my hands over her warm skin, wanting to feel the silkiness under my fingers. She tugged at my sweatshirt, and I fell on top of her, needing her mouth back. She proved adept at using her small feet to push down my sweats so we were skin to skin, my aching cock trapped between us. I memorized her all over again with my hands and mouth. Her rosy nipples begged for my attention, growing to hard peaks under my tongue. The sweet indent of her waist on the right side was ticklish, and I reveled in her giggles as I feathered it with light kisses, and teased her skin. The swell of her hips fit perfectly in my hands as I pressed down gently, opening her up to me. I kissed her belly button, dipping my tongue in to taste the saltiness of her skin. I rained small kisses down to her thighs; her tiny gasps ramping up my desire. Slipping my fingers into her wet heat, I hissed at the sensation. “God, Katy, I want you, baby.”
She sat up, wrapping
me tight in her arms, drawing me back down. “Take me,” she pleaded.
She wound her legs around my hips, urging me to the place where I was desperate to be buried. I stilled as I slid inside, inch-by-inch, until our bodies were flush. Our eyes locked, and I lowered my mouth to hers as I began to move. Slow, even thrusts that built until we were both lost in the heat of us. She clung to me, fingers digging into my back, grabbing my ass, yanking on my hair, as she keened and whimpered my name. I clutched her tight, taking her now with powerful thrusts, our sweat-soaked skin sliding together, our bodies moving as one. With a guttural cry, I buried my face into her neck as she stiffened, her body tightening around me. My orgasm washed over me, cresting hard, every nerve on fire as I released deep inside her, groaning out her name.
“Katy! My Katy.”
Sliding my arms around her back, I rolled to the side, holding her close, pressing kisses to her face, hair, and neck. She hummed, contented and warm, into my chest.
“Love you,” she whispered.
“I love you,” I breathed into her skin. I felt around on the floor, finding a blanket, which I drew up over her bare skin, tucking it around her neck. She curled into my side, fingers tracing a slow pattern over my heart.
“Tomorrow,” I vowed. “Tomorrow we start fresh. Real. Us.”
“Us,” she repeated. “Yes.”
I waited until she fell asleep before I allowed myself to drift off. I shut my eyes, knowing when I awoke she would be beside me.
Secure in that knowledge, I slept.
RICHARD
I SHOOK BILL’S HAND AND walked across the beach. Katy was sitting on the sand, a sketchbook on her knees, pencil in hand, but she was motionless. The breeze picked up the strands of her hair, blowing them back like ribbons of dark silk. I sank down behind her, pulling her back into my embrace.
“Hey.”
She tilted her head back, observing me upside down. “Hi. What were you talking to Bill about for so long?” A frown crossed her face. “Please tell me you didn’t ask about buying the resort.”
I snickered at the expression on her face and dropped a kiss on her forehead. “No. I think he has a buyer. I was thanking him for letting you come back, and we were talking about other things. Where he is moving to, stuff like that.”
She pursed her lips and shrugged, turning back to face the water.
“What are you sketching?”
She held up the book. “Nothing. I’m enjoying the view.”
I wrapped my arms around her waist, holding her tight. “It’s a great view.”
“Penny and I used to build bonfires, cook our supper over them, and watch the sunset.”
“We can do that.”
“You’d eat a hotdog skewered on a stick?”
“Only if there’s mustard. And marshmallows after.”
“Huh.”
Leaning down, I nipped the skin at the juncture of her neck. “You don’t think I’ve ever done any outdoor activities, Katy? I built the fire last night.”
“I wondered where you’d learned to build a fire,” she admitted.
“It’s a man thing. It’s in our genes.”
Twisting around, she rolled her eyes. “Uh-huh.”
Laughing, I pushed the hair from her face. “We did camping trips at school. They taught us how to build a fire, pitch a tent, that sort of thing.”
“You did that at school?”
I rested my chin on her shoulder. “When I was a teenager and stayed at school over spring break, they offered different activities. Camping was one of them. I liked it. And yes, I even liked the hotdogs. I’m not a total snob.”
I expected one of her quick comebacks; instead, she pivoted, reached up, and cupped my cheek. “You stayed at school rather than go to your parents’?”
“If given the choice, yes. They could get away with me not coming home if they told people I was on a school trip or something. I avoided an entire summer when I was fourteen. I did go on a school trip, then I went to camp for a month. It was the best summer of my life.”
“I’m sorry, my darling.”
“Don’t feel sorry for me,” I snapped.
“We had this discussion already. I do feel bad for the child who was abandoned.” She pushed up to her feet. “And, you, Mr. VanRyan, are being rude again.”
She stomped away, her sketchbook under her arm. I scrambled to my feet, catching up to her in a few strides. Those short legs of hers couldn’t cover the ground the way mine could, thank goodness. I grabbed her around the waist, spinning her, and holding her to me.
“I’m being a dick again. Let me apologize.”
She stared at my chest.
“Katy.”
She looked up, meeting my gaze.
“I’m sorry. I strike out without thinking. I’m not used to talking about my past or having someone care about how I felt then, or now.”
“I do care.”
I lifted her up, bringing her face level with mine. “I know. I’m trying to get used to it, okay? Cut me a little slack.” I kissed the corner of her mouth. “I’m new at this trying to be a good guy thing.”
Her eyes softened, and I kissed her again.
“Was that our first fight?”
“Not sure I’d call it a first or a fight.” She smirked.
“Still, I think make-up sex is needed, yeah?”
She tried to look stern, but an impish grin broke out on her face.
I swung her up into my arms, bridal style, striding toward the cottage. “Come on, Mrs. VanRyan. Let me make it up to you. After, we’ll go back into town for hotdogs and marshmallows.”
“And mustard.”
I tossed her on the bed, yanking my shirt over my head. “And mustard.”
I threw another piece of wood on the bonfire and crossed my legs. Katy curled up beside me, her head on my shoulder. I patted her knee. “Warm enough?”
She nodded, bringing the blanket tighter around her shoulders. “It gets cold when it’s dark now.”
“It is fall.”
“I know.”
“How much longer do you want to stay?”
She sighed, her fingers fiddling with the blanket. “I suppose we should get back.”
It had been three days since I arrived. It was the first time in my adult life I had no place to be—no office to head to, no meetings planned, no agenda. The one thing I had to concentrate on was Katy. Aside from the couple trips into town for supplies, we hadn’t left the resort. We walked the beach, made use of the small game room where I tried to teach her the game of checkers and failed miserably, and used the time to know each other better. We talked, often for hours at a time. She knew more about me than anyone in my life. She had a way of asking questions that made me want to tell her things I’d never shared with another person. She shared more stories of her life prior to and after she met Penny. Some of the stories she told, about the time she was alone and on the streets, made me hold her tight and thank whatever deity was listening for keeping her safe.
We made love, often. I couldn’t get enough of her. The body I once found unappealing was now my version of perfection. She fit me so well, and the passion I felt for her was paramount. Her lack of experience made her response to me even more erotic. I loved watching her discover the passionate side of her nature.
She was right, however. We did have to go back to our life, or what was left of it, and figure out what our future held.
“Why don’t we stay another couple days, then we’ll head back? I heard on the radio the weather is changing, so we’d be stuck in the cottage anyway. Not”—I grinned, leaning forward and kissing her—“that I’d object being stuck inside with nothing to do except stay in bed with you.”
“All right,” she agreed with a soft laugh, then turned serious. “I still have to scatter Penny’s ashes.”
“Are you ready to do that, sweetheart?”
Her eyes had a far-away look in them when she spoke. “The fall was her favorite time of year
. She didn’t like the heat of the summer. She looked forward to coming here as much as I did. I think she’d like to stay here.”
“As long as you’re sure.”
“Tomorrow,” she whispered.
I lifted her over to my lap, pressing a kiss to her head. “Tomorrow.”
I woke up, the fluttering of panic fast in my chest when the spot beside me was empty. I sat up, throwing the blanket back and striding out of the bedroom. I relaxed when I spotted Katy on the beach. She stood, facing the water, holding something to her chest. I glanced over, confirming the fact Penny’s urn was gone from the mantle.
My wife was saying goodbye.
Returning to the bedroom, I grabbed my pants, tugging them on. I picked up my T-shirt and yanked it over my head as I hurried outside, crossing the beach. The weather system they had predicted was already making its presence known. The waves were higher, hitting the sand with loud slaps. The wind was picking up, and I knew, soon, the rain would follow, and the storm would make my wife nervous.
I reached her side, enveloping her in my arms.
“I was waiting for you.”
“You should have woken me up.”
“I wanted a little time. I knew you wouldn’t be far behind me.”
“Are you sure?”
She smiled up at me, the glimmer of tears in her eyes telling me the whole story. “Yes.”
“Okay, sweetheart.” I reached for the urn. “Do you want me to open it?”
“Please.”
I held the simple green container in my hand, running my fingers over the wildflowers that decorated its smooth surface.
“Thank you.” I murmured to Penny. “You won’t regret trusting me.”
Carefully, I opened the urn and handed Katy the small bag. She walked away from me toward the edge of the water. I let her go alone, knowing what a personal, emotional moment this was for her.
She was motionless. I could see her lips moving, and I knew she was saying her final farewell. She crouched down, opening the bag and letting the contents drain to the sand at her feet. She stood up, shaking the bag, the final remains caught and taken by the wind. Her head bowed, and she wrapped her arms around her waist, a solitary figure against the backdrop of the heavy skies.