by Maya Banks
Ren smiled slightly. “I was being nosy and trying to decide whether to be rude and ask you a question.”
Both Angelina and Serena lifted their eyebrows. “Oh do tell,” Angelina said. “I think I definitely want to hear this.”
Ren’s cheeks warmed and her courage faltered. “It’s none of my business.”
Serena shrugged. “I’ll let you know if it dips too far into the off-limits territory.”
Ren sucked in her breath. “I just wondered, with you pregnant now and a baby entering the picture. How did it change your relationship? And before you think I’m some freak with too much curiosity for her own good, it’s just that I’ve often weighed my desire for a family—children—with the type of relationship I need and I can’t reconcile the two. But you …you seem to have it all. I think I envy you.”
Serena’s eyes softened and she and Angelina exchanged secret smiles.
“I was worried at first. The decision to have a child wasn’t made lightly by either of us. But in a lot of ways it heightens our relationship. It’s hard to explain. I’ve always loved Damon’s dominance and his protectiveness when it comes to me and how he cherishes me and takes care of me. But it’s even more pronounced now that I’m pregnant with his baby. It’s been truly wonderful.”
Angelina nodded her agreement. “It was the same with me and Micah. He was just so gaga over the idea of me being pregnant with his child. He wouldn’t let me lift a finger. He wasn’t any less dominant, but his dominance was exerted in other ways.”
“It’s not that things didn’t change,” Serena continued. “They did. I mean, it’s not like he’s going to bust out with a flogger or something when I’m as big as a house with swollen ankles and hormonal swings from hell. He still demands my obedience and my respect but he’s less demanding of me physically if that makes sense. But no less emotionally.”
“No, it makes perfect sense,” Ren murmured. “I think it must be wonderful to have that.”
“You should have seen Cole that night in the restaurant,” Serena said in a low voice. “When he saw you again. I’ve never seen him like that. He was so determined to find you.”
Ren smiled. “Yes, he was.”
“As much as I hate to interrupt you ladies, dinner is being served,” Damon said as he came to stand beside Serena. He lowered his hand and gently pulled his wife up beside him.
Ren stood and edged toward Cole. His hand slid over her shoulder and he squeezed reassuringly. Just that simple gesture warmed her to her toes. He wrapped his arm around her waist and stood there holding her to him while he waited for the others to precede them out of the living room.
“Everything okay?” he murmured in her ear as they turned to follow.
She nodded and then laced her hand with his, liking the comfort of his touch. He kept his fingers twined with hers as they entered the dining room and then he ushered her into her seat before taking the one next to her.
Dinner conversation was light and she relaxed more as the evening wore on. Cole’s friends were good people. Down to earth. Damon obviously had more money than God, but he wasn’t pretentious, seemed to have no ego, but he wore confidence as surely as Cole did.
Micah wasn’t as affluent as the other two men but he fit in well with the others. He too oozed confidence. His expression, his demeanor, it all spoke of a strong man who knew exactly what he wanted and apologized to no one.
In the company of so many gorgeous, alpha males, Ren was light-headed. She was well acquainted with the entire spectrum of dominant men. There were those who played at being dominant, those who tried to be dominant and then there were those who just were. It didn’t take effort or practice. It came to them as naturally as breathing. They had nothing to prove, no ego to be stroked. They liked what they liked and adored the women in their care.
These three were such men.
She was suddenly eager to return home with Cole so she could enjoy his every whim. It heated her blood to imagine what he would want from her, what he would exact or how he’d seek to gain his pleasure from her.
And then she imagined herself round and big with his child. How much more adoring would he be? He already was so mindful of her well-being. Her throat tightened at the wistful thoughts. Having his baby was a lovely fantasy.
She shook her head. Seeing Serena had made her fanciful. She was still far too young to worry about having babies. She hadn’t even managed to land in a stable relationship yet. But one day…
“I hope you’re thinking of me.”
Cole’s soft murmur caressed her ear and she started guiltily. When she realized only he had noticed her inattention to the current conversation she relaxed and leaned into his side.
“I was,” she admitted. “I was thinking of later tonight. When I’m yours to command. I was imagining what you would want.”
His gaze smoldered and the blue in his eyes burned like a flame. And then he simply stood, helped her gracefully to her feet and said in Damon’s direction, “Thank you for dinner, Damon.” He nodded at Serena. “And you, Serena. It was lovely. I’ll be taking Ren home now. I’m afraid the evening has been tiring for her.”
Amusement gleamed in Micah’s eyes as his gaze drifted from Cole to Ren. It took all of Ren’s control not to blush.
“See you later, man,” Micah called.
“It was nice to meet you both,” Ren said to Serena and Angelina. “I hope to see you again sometime.”
“Oh, I think you can count on it,” Angelina said with a grin.
Cole’s hand tightened around her arm and she found herself being propelled toward the doorway where Sam waited.
“Good night,” Sam said politely as he showed them out.
Cole muttered a good night and then hurriedly pushed Ren into the car. When he slid into the driver’s seat a moment later, his hands shook as he put the keys into the ignition.
He turned to look at her as he accelerated down the drive. “I hope you’re up for what I have in mind, darling. It was sheer hell sitting next to you all night when you were looking so damn sexy in that dress. And then to know you were thinking of me and what I would do to you later …”
She smiled, well satisfied with the promise in his eyes. “I’m up for it.”
CHAPTER 22
T he ride home was tense and silent. Every inch of Ren’s skin was alive and aware. Her senses were hyperreactive. Every look he threw her way. Each time he moved. It all served to heighten the anticipation of when they’d arrive home and she’d see just how ruthless he could be.
She sensed it in him tonight. How close to the edge he skated. As if to now he’d leashed that part of himself he most wanted to let loose.
She couldn’t wait.
How magnificent would it be to feel the full force of all that power. To know that she was safe and protected by his strength.
She shivered as they pulled into his drive. It was hard to breathe. Each respiration was short, rapid and so light that at times she thought maybe she held them in.
“Get out,” he said in a terse voice.
Her hand shaking, she fumbled with the handle before finally pushing the door open. She stepped out and he was there instantly, so close she could smell him, could feel the warmth emanating from his tense body.
“Go inside, undress. Wear only the pink heels I just purchased for you. Wait for me in the bedroom, on your knees, ready to receive me. You have five minutes.”
She didn’t hesitate. Turning, she hurried inside, her pulse thumping with enough force as to unsettle her. She had to force herself to go slow up the stairs or risk falling.
Once in his bedroom, she stripped down to nothing and then ducked into her closet for the pink shoes. She slid her feet into them and caught a glimpse of herself in the full-length mirror on the back of the closet door.
She looked deliciously wanton. Her hair was tousled and spilled over her shoulders and down her back. Her nipples were dark and taut to the point of aching. And the fuck-me shoes
made her purr with approval. Oh Cole, are you in for a treat.
She smiled because she wasn’t one for false modesty. She looked good. She was in shape. And she liked her body.
She slid her hands over her hips and then up her waist to cup her breasts. Cole thought her beautiful and he said it in a way that made her believe she absolutely was. He liked her confidence but she’d realized quickly that her confidence was at its highest with him and Lucas.
She fully believed that one of the reasons some of her past relationships hadn’t worked and that one man in particular had worked so hard to break her down was because he and others like him had been threatened by her confidence. Some men didn’t deal well with a capable, confident woman and their instinct was to do everything in their power to destroy them.
Conversely, there were men like Lucas and Cole who reveled in a strong, self-assured woman. Yes, they were dominant, but they celebrated strength in their women. Even as they controlled, protected and cherished them.
It was a contradiction not understood by many. How could a man bent on completely dominating a woman possibly appreciate strength and self-sufficiency?
Ren had seen men from the full spectrum. Some played at dominance. Some were abusive in their absolute control. Some had no interest in the woman’s happiness, only their own. To some it was a game and nothing more. But then there were men like Cole and Lucas. Men who appreciated beauty. Celebrated it in many forms. And recognized that it came from a much deeper place than flesh.
These were men who had deep respect for the women in their keeping and in return they garnered Ren’s respect. It wasn’t something she offered lightly. Neither was her trust. Both had to be earned.
Looking at it that way, she realized she couldn’t lose. No matter which way she chose or which way was chosen for her, if Lucas had indeed walked away from her. She was fortunate. More fortunate than most, because she’d found not only one man she could trust absolutely, but two.
Peace settled over her like a warm, comforting hug. Peace, like everything else, was fleeting. Tomorrow she might be back to worrying or agonizing, but just for now she could let go and live in the moment. Because she might not ever get today back and tomorrow never offered any guarantees.
She smiled, nodded to herself in the mirror. She had a man to please and in doing so, please herself. She turned and retraced her steps back into the bedroom, stepped onto the thick rug Cole had put down the morning after she’d stayed on her knees on the hardwood floor waiting for him.
He hadn’t said a word, but the message was loud and clear. He would have her do nothing that brought her discomfort.
She went to her knees, briefly closed her eyes and took in a deep, calming breath. Then just as quickly as calm had descended, she heard his footsteps on the stairs.
Her pulse leapt to life and pounded beneath her skin. Her breathing sped up and got more shallow. Anticipation licked up her spine, sending chill bumps scattering across her back.
And then he walked into the bedroom, stopped and let his gaze rove appreciatively over her body.
He filled the room. The very air around her changed and went thick and heavy. He moved like a dream. There was authority in the way he carried himself. No hesitance. His gaze never left her, but neither did he show any hint of reaction.
He walked around her, loosening the buttons of his shirt. She kept her gaze straight ahead and remained still as he took his time undressing. After a moment he went into the bathroom and it seemed an eternity until he returned.
He was down to his jeans and she couldn’t help but stare at the lean muscle of his chest and rib cage. His shoulders were broad, and his arms rippled with muscle. A smattering of light brown, almost blond hair gathered at the hollow of his chest and then meandered in a straight line to his navel.
It was hell to wait when she wanted nothing more than to get to her feet and take what she wanted. And he looked to be in no hurry.
He crossed the room and opened an oak armoire. A moment later, he closed the door and she could see him holding coiled rope. A lot of rope. She swallowed and sucked in air through her nose.
He came to stand in front of her, holding the rope and then he slowly began unwinding it.
“Stand,” he commanded. “Legs apart, gaze forward, arms at your sides.”
Hoping she didn’t pitch forward, she awkwardly got to her feet, making sure she didn’t teeter in the heels.
Satisfaction darkened his eyes and she soaked up his approval.
“I love a woman in bondage,” he said, his voice low and husky and so enthralling she found herself leaning in his direction. “There is something so compelling about a woman bound and helpless, dependent on me for pleasure, for mercy, for everything.”
He was killing her. She closed her eyes and moaned softly, unable to quell the need that rose sharp within her.
“I’m going to cover you in rope, Ren. Only your breasts will be bare. Your pussy, your ass, your mouth. All of the things that please me the most and that I’ll avail myself of for my own pleasure.”
She swallowed again and lowered her head slightly in a show of submission.
He slid his fingers underneath her chin and prodded her upward once more. “Never look down, Ren. You may submit to me. You may obey me. But never, ever, will you look down like you’re lesser. Eyes and chin up always. Show me the proud, spirited woman who chooses to give me the gift of her submission.”
Tears burned her lids and she fought to keep them from falling. She met his gaze with fierce gratitude. For understanding her. For accepting her and for wanting her to be strong.
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. Just a whisper. Like a salute to the woman she was. His acknowledgment of who she was.
He began winding the rope around her body in intricate patterns. It was soft against her skin and he was careful that it didn’t abrade her flesh anywhere. The rope was pliable and would do no damage to her body.
Underneath her breasts and then over, drawing attention to the plump swells and presenting them to their best advantage. Between and over her legs, under and over her shoulders.
“I’m going to lay you on the bed to finish,” he said as he paused.
Gently, he lifted her and put her on her side on the bed. Immediately he curled her legs behind her, bending them at the knees before securing the rope around her thighs and ankles to keep her legs tightly bound together. When he was done, he rolled her onto her belly and brought her hands behind her back and secured them to her waist.
She was rendered immobile. The only part of her body she could move was her head. She was trussed hand and foot and positioned in such a way that she was absolutely helpless.
His hand smoothed over her ass in a gesture meant to comfort. “I’m going to suspend you from the ceiling. There is enough rope that it won’t cut into you and will easily bear your weight, but if anything hurts you at any time, I want you to tell me.”
She nodded.
His hands moved over her body, securing more rope and then he stepped back and pushed a button on the wall by the bed.
She gasped when she was lifted off the bed and began moving toward the foot and then over the floor. She dangled several feet above the carpet she’d knelt on and at first the sensation was dizzying.
Cole was there, immediately, his hand cupping her cheek and caressing until she gained her bearings.
“Do you know what I love most about this position? Besides the fact that you’re incredibly arresting wrapped in my rope, suspended in my bedroom. You’re open and vulnerable. I can have you in any way I want as many times as I want for as long as I want. And I’m going to have you, Ren.”
He walked around behind her and trailed a finger down the cleft of her ass, down to her pussy. He circled her entrance, pushed in to the knuckle once before withdrawing and fingering her clit.
Then he spun her slowly around so that he was standing at her mouth. He reached down, grasped her jaw, holding her in
place, a clear sign of what he intended to do.
He let her go and she heard the rasp of his zipper. Then he turned her head to the side so that he had a better angle of entry into her mouth. Her hair hung down, trailing toward the floor. He caressed her cheek, petting and touching even as he prodded her mouth open.
“I’m going to fuck your mouth, Ren. There’s a difference. I could demand that you suck me off but what I want is for you to remain perfectly still while I fuck you long and hard and use your mouth just like I would use your pussy.”
His words incited dark fire deep within her soul. Those words, those dark promises called to a need buried so deep inside her that it was an essential, living, breathing part of her. It wasn’t just what she needed or wanted. It was who she was and she embraced it with every part of her.
He gripped the back of her head and guided his cock to her mouth. As soon as her lips parted, he shoved deep. Rough, hard, to the very back of her throat.
Her reflex was to gag but she battled with every ounce of her strength, forcing herself to relax and let him use her as he wanted. The very last thing she wanted was to fight him. She wanted this. Wanted him. All the shadows, the hard edges, the parts that he hid from everyone else.
She swung carelessly with the ropes as he pulled her to meet his thrusts. He slid over her tongue, his taste filling her mouth. She made wet sucking sounds as he ground against her chin, sounds he seemed to enjoy.
His hold on her was ruthless and yet there was tenderness in his fingers. Or maybe she imagined it. There was nothing gentle about his possession of her. He fucked her every bit as hard as he’d hinted.
She forced air through her nostrils and they flared when he lodged himself in the back of her throat and remained there several long seconds. But he always seemed to know precisely when she’d had enough and was at her limit. He eased back, granting her the freedom to breathe and to swallow and steady herself.
Then he was back inside her mouth. Stroking. Thrusting. Fucking. All too soon he angled her head further back and tilted her mouth upwards as he pulled at his erection.