by Maya Banks
There weren’t many guests in the small church, but all were family. A family that had banded together to ensure that the women they loved never suffered at the hands of such evil again.
As much as Zack had wanted to marry Gracie as soon as humanly possible and to never let her go again, she’d needed time to heal, but most important, Zack refused to have their marriage ceremony until they were certain that every last person responsible for so much pain and death were extinguished.
His and Gracie’s wedding day would be perfect and there would be no worry of retaliation. Their thoughts would only be of each other and the future they’d once mapped every inch of, a future they’d both thought lost to them. But no, it had only been on hold as fate waited for them to find their way back to one another.
The doors opened again as music swelled and filled the sanctuary. Zack’s breath caught when he saw Gracie for the first time in her wedding gown.
She stood beside Wade, her smile as big as the sun, her eyes sparkling with joy. And then Wade slowly began walking her down the aisle.
Zack hastily wiped at his burning eyes, determined to hold it together and not ruin Gracie’s day. It had touched him and Wade both that Gracie had asked Wade to give her away. No longer did Zack harbor any animosity toward the other man. He’d been a source of support Gracie had desperately needed, and well, he’d also taken a bullet meant for Eliza, which meant that the entire DSS organization owed him their gratitude for saving someone so important and beloved by all.
He shouldn’t have bothered trying to disguise his emotion. As Gracie drew closer to Zack, he saw the shimmer of tears in her eyes and then watched as they traced silently down her cheeks.
Her gaze was locked solely on him, as if they were the only two people in the room. She walked toward him with no hesitation, Wade at her side. But when she reached Zack, she slipped her arm from Wade’s but then took his hand, holding on to it for a long moment as she looked away from Zack for the first time and met Wade’s soft gaze.
“Thank you for being the friend I needed so very much,” she whispered.
To Zack’s shock, he saw a faint glimmer in Wade’s eyes, but then it was gone, leaving Zack to wonder if he’d imagined it.
Wade lifted his hand from Gracie’s grasp and gently cupped her cheek, wiping the thin line of moisture away with his thumb.
“Be happy, Anna-Grace,” Wade said quietly. Then he leaned down and kissed her softly on the cheek.
Afterward, he let his hand fall and once more curled his fingers around Gracie’s hand, but this time he lifted her hand toward Zack. As Zack slipped his fingers through hers, Wade pinned him with his gaze.
“You are getting a rare and precious gift, Covington. Take care of her.”
“Always,” Zack vowed in a somber voice.
Wade stepped back and then seated himself on the front pew where other members of DSS sat.
Zack knew he and Gracie should turn to the preacher, who was waiting to begin the ceremony. But he couldn’t break the magic of this moment, one he’d dreamed of for so very long.
“I can’t believe you’re standing in front of me in your wedding dress,” Zack whispered, nearly choking on the words. A knot of emotion swelled rapidly in his throat, threatening to render him incapable of any speech. “I love you, Gracie. And never, ever will I forget today.”
Another tear rolled down her cheek, but her smile—God. It was like being enveloped by the sun after a long, harsh winter. And her eyes. Liquid brown. So warm that he’d never feel the cold wrought by complete emptiness.
Unable to help himself, he framed her face in his hands and leaned down to capture her lips in a long, sweet kiss.
Hoots and laughter rose from the others. And then the ribbing began.
“Do you need cue cards there, buddy?” Beau asked from behind him. “I’m pretty sure that part comes after ‘you may kiss the bride’.”
Zack broke away to glare at all of them. “I’ll kiss my bride any damn time I want to.”
“Amen to that,” Caleb muttered and was greeted by another round of amused laughter.
Beau shrugged. “The man does have a point. I do kiss my bride any damn time I want to.”
Ari blew her husband a kiss from across the aisle.
Zack smiled down at Gracie, whose tears were gone thanks to laughter. She was so radiant that she glowed like a beacon. A ray of sun. His sunshine.
“What do you say we get properly married?” he asked with a grin.
Then to his surprise, Gracie defied ceremony and circumstance as she leaned up on tiptoe and fused her lips to his. All else fled his mind under the sweetness of her kiss. And when she finally pulled away, he was hard-pressed to remember his own name, much less what he was supposed to do next.
Smiling, she tugged him toward the pastor. “This is the part where we both say ‘I do’.”
“I do,” he whispered so only she could hear. “I do, I will, I always will. And never will we be parted again.”
THIRTY-SIX
ZACK stood in the bay window overlooking the ocean and inhaled the salty air in an effort to settle his nerves. It felt as though someone had their fingers wrapped permanently around his neck in a choke hold. For God’s sake, even his palms were sweaty, and his fingers shook when he unrolled them from the tight fists formed at his sides.
He closed his eyes, lifting one of his fists to rub his hand through his hair and then he gripped the back of his neck with his palm, absently massaging as he tried to get himself together.
Gracie had been nervous the moment they got inside their suite. The tension was palpable when she’d excused herself to go change for bed.
Not wanting to move too fast or shove himself in her face from the start, instead of stripping down—as one might have done when about to embark on his wedding night—he kept his boxers and socks on.
He glanced ruefully down at his sock-covered feet and shook his head, a light chuckle escaping. Socks? Really? The boxers were understandable. The socks were just a result of his own nerves. He quickly toed out of them and kicked them underneath the chair by the window.
He had to get his shit straight before he completely lost it and ruined the night for him and Gracie before it even began. This would be more difficult for Gracie than it ever would be for him. But at the same time, what if he made the wrong move? What if he ended up traumatizing her? The last thing in the world he wanted was for their wedding night to be a disaster because he made some boneheaded move or by him simply not knowing the right thing to do at the right time.
The latter was the more distinct possibility. He felt clumsy and inept, just like the virgin he would have—and should have—been for Gracie. He broke his promise to her but she’d kept her promise to him.
Tonight Gracie would give herself to him and only him. The knowledge that he was the first and only man who would be given such a precious gift nearly brought him to his knees. He was humbled and . . . ashamed.
“Zack?”
Gracie’s wavering voice reached him, and he turned swiftly around, cursing the fact that he’d been so caught up in his deep shame that he’d failed to hear Gracie come out of the bathroom. He should have been there waiting for her, to reassure her instead of her having to be so vulnerable by, in essence, making the first move.
All the breath left his body in a long exhale when his gaze fell over her. His mouth went dry and his heart sped up until he could feel the hard thud against his chest.
She was wearing a white silk, lacy gown that fell in waves down her body to swirl at her feet. Only the tips of her dainty toes peeked out from beneath the hem. Bright pink. He wanted to kiss each and every one of those sweet toes. Just as he wanted to kiss and touch every inch of her satiny skin.
But the bodice. Good Lord, but that was a gown destined to give a man heart failure. He was standing, speechless, staring at her like a prepubescent boy seeing naked pictures of a woman for the first time.
The neckline plunge
d in a deep V between her breasts, all the way to the indention of her belly button. The material clung strategically to her breasts so they weren’t bared, but the lace was sheer and he could see the shadow of her nipples. He could see their shape puckering against the gown.
Her lips trembled as they formed a smile, and he finally kicked himself into gear so he didn’t remain there gawking at her like a moron for the entire night.
He had to form the words twice, because his first effort to speak just didn’t happen.
“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life,” he said in a hoarse voice roughened by emotion.
She blushed but her eyes lit up and sparkled, her smile widening at his reaction.
“I’m afraid to touch you,” he admitted. “I’m so afraid that if I touch you, I’ll wake up and this will all have been a dream. The most wonderful dream of my life, but just a dream nonetheless.”
She moved forward when again it should have been him going to her. Giving her reassurance, love and comfort. Her fingers slid down his arms until they caught and tangled with his, and it was then he felt her trembling and his heart softened. His entire body caved in.
He gathered her hands in between his and gently squeezed as he absorbed the image, the angel, standing before him. Tears burned his eyelids and he tried to swallow them back.
Tonight was not a night for tears. Or sadness. Or regret. Or even shame. Tonight was the night of his dreams. Of all the dreams he’d ever dreamed all rolled together in one wonderful, living, breathing moment.
And yet, he couldn’t quite keep one thing from creeping into his mind and casting shade on all his joy.
“I’m sorry, Gracie,” he choked out.
She looked baffled. She cocked her head to the side and tightened her hold on his hands as if offering him reassurance.
“I didn’t keep my promise to you.”
He had to look away as a single tear burned its way down the cheek he now hid.
“I promised you that you would be my first. That I would come to you as untouched as you were. You are giving me the most precious gift a man can ever hope to receive. You’re honoring me as the first man you’re allowing to make love to you. And I can’t even say you’re the second or third woman I’ve been with.”
He closed his eyes, causing more liquid to slide down his face.
“Zack,” she whispered. She gripped his hands tighter. “Zack, look at me please.”
He slowly turned his head to meet her gaze and saw mirroring tears and emotion in her eyes.
“Did you ever give any of those women your heart?” she asked softly.
“No,” he said emphatically, his tone harsher than he intended. God, to even think for a moment that any other woman than Gracie had ever held a piece of his heart. “Never.”
She smiled and then leaned up until she was straining to reach his height and gently wiped the wet trail from his cheek. He wrapped his arms around her, gathering her tightly against him, lifting so she wasn’t at such a height disadvantage.
“Just like always,” she said, wrapping her arms loosely around his neck. “You holding me up. Never letting me fall. Always protecting me from the world.”
“Forever,” he vowed, staring directly into her eyes, allowing her to see, to feel the sincerity of his promise.
She lovingly cupped his jaw and stared back at him, so much love shining in her warm brown eyes that it nearly undid him.
“You never gave your heart to another woman but me,” she said, her eyes growing as serious as her tone. “You never gave them a part of your soul as you’ve done with me.”
“Not just a part,” he said adamantly. “All of it, Gracie. My heart, soul, body and mind. I never gave to anyone else what was yours to keep.”
“Then I fail to see how you broke your promise to me.”
For a moment he couldn’t even breathe. His vision blurred and he pulled her even closer so his face was buried in her hair and her head lay against his cheek. He inhaled her sweet scent and held it for as long as he could before allowing it to escape his body.
“I love you,” he said, his voice breaking up under the weight of so much emotion. “I’ll never love anyone else. It’s always been you. Thank God you found your way back to me. Don’t ever leave me, Gracie. I can’t live without you. I’m not whole without you. The last twelve years have been so empty. I don’t ever want to have to live that way again.”
She turned her face so that her lips met the corner of his mouth.
“I love you too, Zack. And I’ll never leave you again.”
Slowly, Zack walked toward the bed, carrying Gracie molded to his body. When he got to the edge, he very carefully lowered her to the mattress. He straightened, staring down transfixed by the sight of her.
Her hair was spread out and disheveled looking. Her cheeks were pink and flushed with the same nervousness that assailed him. Her nipples puckered and strained against the confining material of her gown.
Unable to resist such delicious temptation, he lowered his head to where the neckline plunged to her navel and he pressed his lips over the shallow indention, fully intending to kiss his way up her entire body. No way he was rushing this. It would take all night and he was going to enjoy every single minute.
“I’m scared,” she said in a quivering voice.
He immediately raised his head to meet her eyes. And then he lowered his body so he lay against her side, his leg going over the tops of hers possessively. But at the same time, he made sure he wasn’t making her uncomfortable.
“What are you scared of, baby?”
She swallowed hard and then she turned her head to the side so she met his gaze.
“I don’t know what to do,” she admitted. “I’ve never . . . I mean not willingly.”
She promptly closed her eyes, but not before Zack saw the shame darken the brown depths. He had to work very hard to control the rage building inside him. This was too important for him to fuck up. He had to handle her very gently.
“Of course you haven’t,” he said. “But neither have I, Gracie. I’ve never made love to a woman in my life. How could I have when I’m only in love with you?”
She blinked and swallowed again and he touched his finger to her cheek, running it over her silky skin.
“I’m scared too,” he admitted. “Nothing has ever been more important than this night, this moment. I don’t want to hurt you or scare you or go to fast. In fact . . .”
He leaned down to kiss her lips before continuing his thought.
“No one says we have to make love tonight,” he whispered. “We have all the time in the world. The rest of our lives. I would be the happiest man in the world just to get to hold you in my arms while you sleep and know that you’re finally mine. That you wear my ring and bear my last name.”
Gracie pushed herself up and over Zack, her eyes blazing in the low light cast by the bedside lamp. “No,” she said fiercely. Her hand slid over his chest until it rested just above his heart. There was sorrow in her eyes, but also determination. “I won’t let them take tonight from me. I won’t!”
Tears welled in her eyes and she leaned down so her forehead rested against his. Their lips hovered so close that their breaths mingled.
“I’m not afraid of you,” she said. “Never of you, Zack. I know you won’t hurt me. I’ve waited for this moment for twelve years.”
The last words were nearly cut off as she choked them out. He cupped the side of her face with his hand, drawing her down so their lips met. He stroked her jaw as they kissed lightly, the only sound coming from the soft smooching.
“I’m only afraid because I don’t know what to do,” she whispered against his lips. “I want to please you, but I don’t know how. I want this night so much that I’m afraid of messing it all up and making us both miserable.”
Zack wrapped his arms around her and rolled until he was atop her, though he made sure to prevent his full weight from crushing her. He star
ed at her with eyes that surely blazed as hers had just moments before.
“You will never disappoint me. You will never not please me. It’s impossible, Gracie. You married me today. You’re wearing my ring. You’ve taken my name. I couldn’t be any happier than I am right now and I don’t give a damn if we make love or not. Just having you here, with me, in my arms is enough. It will always be enough.”
“And if I want you to make love to me?” she whispered.
Savage satisfaction such as he’d never known gripped him.
“Then I’ll make love to you,” he said in a low growl.
“Please,” she said sweetly. “Make love to me, Zack. We’ve both waited so very long for this.”
He fused his mouth to hers, cutting off anything further she might say. This time he allowed his restraint to slip and he put every ounce of feeling, of love, into his kiss.
Their tongues met and slid hotly over each other. He tasted her, devoured her, then went back for more.
He let one hand fall gently down the side of her neck and to her shoulder where his fingers caught on the thin string holding her gown up. With infinite care, he pulled it over her shoulder and down her bare arm.
Goose bumps danced beneath his touch. She shivered even as she deepened their kiss and let out a low moan of desire—of need. Need that matched his own desperate desire for her, for this. For him to finally, finally make her his.
“Don’t let me hurt you,” he ground out as he slid her gown further down her body.
“You won’t,” she denied.
God, she was so beautiful. So perfectly formed. He paused when the gown was at her waist to stare at the supple curves of her breasts. Then, unable to wait a second longer, he lowered his mouth to taste them.
She gasped and arched upward when he sucked one turgid peak between his teeth. He licked and sucked until she was writhing beneath him. Then he turned his attention to the other, coaxing it to rigidity like he had done to the first.
Her hands flew over his arms, his shoulders, his back, up and down. When he hit a particularly sensitive spot, her hands would still and her fingers would dig into his flesh as if the pleasure was nearly unbearable. It certainly was for him.
He ached to slide into her welcoming body. His dick had never ached so bad in his life. Never had he wanted someone with the desperation he wanted Gracie. His Gracie. But he forced himself to go slowly, not wanting the moment over too soon. Instead he stoked and built the fire burning between them until it was an inferno of desire and need consuming them both.
He let out a groan when her mouth slid hotly over his neck and then up to his ear where she nibbled and teased. He was panting, so desperate was he for breath. But she did that to him. All he had to do was look at her and he was breathless. And he knew that would never change.
His mouth covered every inch of her skin, from head to her pretty pink toes. And just as he’d fantasized, he kissed every single toe.
After the last toe, he nudged her legs farther apart and began kissing his way up the inside of her leg, pausing when he got to the sensitive skin around her knee. He smiled when she flinched. Her knees were definitely her weakness.
But he was determined to find new weaknesses. New places he could drive her mindless with pleasure. She tensed when his mouth traveled up the inside of her thigh. Her fingers slid through his hair and curled just as he placed a tender kiss on her soft mound.
With a gentle touch, he parted the ultra soft lips between her legs and exposed her satiny opening and the tiny, pulsing center of her pleasure.
He laved his tongue over her clit first, stroking, enjoying each and every sigh of pleasure wrung from her. Then he grew bolder, sucking ever so gently until her hips bucked upward to meet his demands.
He was shaking with so much pent up need as he eased one finger inside her opening. The velvet walls closed around the tip, sucking him further inside and his eyes nearly rolled to the back of his head as he imagined his aching erection bathed in such plushness.
Gracie’s legs trembled and shook. Her entire body was shaking. Her eyes burned brightly when he lifted his head to meet her gaze. The question was unspoken and yet she responded by nodding. Then as if to further convince him she put both hands on his shoulders.
“Please, Zack,” she begged softly. “Please, I need you.”
The hell she’d ever beg for anything he could give her.
He rose up and settled himself between her splayed thighs and he stared down at the beautiful feast of naked woman spread out before him.
“I’ll never ask for another thing as long as I live,” he said in a hoarse voice. “All I ever wanted was you.”
A tear slid from the corner of Gracie’s eye and over her temple to disappear into her hair.
Using every ounce of restraint he owned, he positioned himself at the mouth