by Maya Banks
“Jesus,” Sterling muttered. “Anna-Grace is convinced you betrayed her. It’s not something she merely suspects. She knows without doubt that you orchestrated the entire sordid mess.”
“So why do you not think Zack did it now?” Eliza asked curiously.
“No one can fake that kind of reaction,” Sterling said in a low voice. “That kind of shock and surprise. Fuck. He didn’t even know about it. Am I right, Covington?”
Zack gave a clipped nod.
“But you know what happened,” Eliza pressed. “She confided in you.”
“Finally,” Sterling admitted. “It took a long time. I mean I knew something bad had happened to her. She was so fragile. And sad. There was so much sorrow in her eyes that it hurt to look at her at times.”
“Christ,” Zack said, nearly choking on the knot forming in his throat. “She thinks I did that to her? That I set it up?”
He couldn’t wrap his mind around it. What the hell could he have done to ever make Gracie think he would do such a thing?
“Did she say why she thinks Zack was behind it?” Eliza asked curiously.
Sterling shook his head. “I asked. I mean from the way she described your relationship I found it hard to believe myself. But she was so adamant. Said she knew without a doubt that you’d horribly betrayed her. And after that one time, she never spoke of it again. She refused. I could tell it still hurt her even after twelve years.”
“Duh,” Eliza muttered. “Women don’t get over shit like that overnight.”
“But I didn’t do anything!” Zack said, his voice rising. “You can’t think I’d do something like that, Lizzie.”
She squeezed his hand again. “No, I don’t think so at all, Zack. But she does. And she’s the most important person in this equation. It doesn’t matter what I think. She’s the one who is convinced you fucked her over. Until you can convince her otherwise, nothing changes.”
“I have to get back to her,” Zack said resolutely.
His gaze flickered over Sterling.
“We’ll dump him back at his car and then we have to go.”
“Whoa, wait a minute. So you do have her,” Sterling said with a frown.
Zack sighed and quickly brought Sterling up to speed on the events of the last twenty-four hours. He wasn’t sure when he’d stopped viewing Sterling as the enemy—a competitor—but it was clear the man cared about Gracie. Gracie had confided in him something she likely had never confided in anyone else. So whether Zack liked it or not, it would appear that Sterling was an important figure in Gracie’s life. Perhaps her only friend and ally.
“Son of a bitch!” Sterling spat out. “Who the fuck beats up an innocent woman just to send a message?”
“Cowards. That’s who,” Eliza said, her features wrinkling in distaste.
“How is she?” Sterling demanded. “I’d like to see her.”
Zack hesitated. The very last thing he wanted was for Sterling to have access to Gracie. But then again, perhaps allowing it would go a long way in rebuilding her trust in him.
“Just what is between you and Gracie?” Zack asked carefully.
He wasn’t agreeing to anything until he had a clearer picture of Sterling’s relationship with her.
Sterling studied him for a long moment. “It’s not like that,” Sterling began. “I’m her friend. Her only friend. I care a lot about her. She’s like a little sister to me.”
Zack’s eyes narrowed in disbelief. Gracie was hardly the kind of woman most men would view as their sister. She was beautiful. So beautiful it hurt to look at her.
Sterling let out a sound of exasperation. “Okay, sure, in the beginning I was interested. But after getting to know her, I realized that the last thing she needed was a relationship. But what she did need was a friend. Someone she could trust. And it took a long time for her to trust me.”
Zack felt grudging respect for the other man. It certainly appeared as though he’d been good to Gracie. Had been there when she needed someone. But it burned like acid in his mind and heart that he hadn’t been the one she leaned on. He hadn’t been her rock, her friend, her lover. He’d been . . . nothing. When she’d been everything in the world to him, she’d thought he’d betrayed her in the worst way.
He wanted to throw up.
“I need to know everything,” Zack said quietly. “We’ll drop you back by your truck so you can follow us back to the hospital. You can see Gracie. Maybe it will appease her fears if she sees a familiar face and understands that I’m not going to . . . hurt . . . her.”
He nearly strangled saying the last. As if he’d ever hurt her. But she didn’t believe the same. She believed he’d already hurt her.
“Okay, but I really don’t know that much. Sorry. She wasn’t very forthcoming on the details. All she said was the man she loved had set her up and wanted to get rid of her. She then told me that you arranged for her to be raped by . . .”
He broke off and glanced warily at Zack as if afraid of the impending outburst.
“Just say it,” Zack said through his teeth.
What could be worse than what Sterling had already related?
He should have known it could get worse. It could always get worse.
“She was raped by three of your friends,” Sterling said softly.
Zack’s mouth flapped open and shut. He was utterly robbed of speech. His mind was such a red cloud of fury he couldn’t breathe. He didn’t think it could get any worse than Gracie being raped and believing it was at his instigation. But she hadn’t simply been raped. She’d been gang-raped. By people he trusted! People he called friends? He was a hair’s breath from completely and utterly losing all control and turning over the entire goddamn world to find the sons of bitches who’d violated Gracie in the most demeaning, dehumanizing manner possible.
“What friends?” he demanded hoarsely.
“I don’t know. I swear,” Sterling said. “She didn’t get into much detail. All she said was that three of your friends raped her at your request. That you wanted to get rid of her for good. It happened while you were at school. The day before you were due to come home again. She said you wanted the job done and for her to be gone by the time you got home from school.”
Tears of rage and anguish swirled chaotically in his eyes. This was insane. It was something straight out of fiction or some bizarre movie. This shit didn’t happen in real life, did it?
His friends had raped the woman he loved? Supposedly at his behest? And she believed that?
How could she have had so little faith in him? She should have come to him. Immediately. God, he would have killed every last one of them. He would have done anything in the world to protect her, to make it better. He would have gladly spent the rest of his life in jail if it meant seeking justice for the horrific crime committed against her. He would have spared no regret and he would have made damn sure that Gracie was taken care of for the rest of her life. Had whatever she needed. And she damn well would have known that he loved her with every piece of his soul.
What friends?
Someone he’d trusted had violated the woman he loved? It was no secret that Zack was solidly in love with Gracie. That he’d planned his entire life around her. Everyone knew it. Even his asshole of a father. Even his father had resigned himself to the fact that Gracie was going nowhere. That she’d forever be a part of his son’s life. That for Zack everything, everything revolved around her and her happiness. There was nothing he wouldn’t do, wouldn’t sacrifice for her love and happiness.
“So you know nothing at all other than she was raped. By my friends. Because I asked them to.”
He could barely even get the words out. They choked him. The taste was so bitter in his mouth that he gagged.
This wasn’t happening. After twelve years without her, he’d dreamed of this moment. The moment when they were reunited. Perhaps he’d imagined it a bit too optimistically. Maybe he’d truly thought that whatever misunderstanding had driven them a
part could be overcome with a few words and that everything would be okay. That they’d resume their life together and live happily ever after.
How the hell were they ever going to be able to overcome this? He didn’t even know where to start.
Why would his friends rape her? Why would they try to tear them apart? Well, they certainly hadn’t tried. They’d succeeded beyond his wildest imagination. But it still kept coming back to . . . why? Had they hated her so much? Had they hated him so much? Was it jealousy? Resentment for what they deemed his perfect life? How could anyone do something so utterly despicable?
He searched his memory, trying to remember how they’d acted around her. Granted, she hadn’t been exposed to them often. Zack hadn’t wanted to share her with his friends or anyone else for that matter. He was extremely possessive of Gracie and his time with her. Had they resented being second best to a mere girl? Had they set out to ruin not only her life but his as well? He couldn’t wrap his head around any of it.
But he didn’t remember any animosity. His group of friends had been polite and respectful. They’d even teased and played around with her in an effort to make her feel comfortable. Gracie had been terribly shy. Her self-esteem and self-confidence hadn’t been strong. He’d used every opportunity to build her up. To make her secure in the knowledge that she was perfect to him. That he loved her, would always love her.
The only person who’d been overtly hostile toward her and had never made the effort to disguise his dislike of her had been his father. But after that first time he’d brought her home to meet his father, he made sure the two were never exposed to one another again.
He couldn’t put his finger on a single guy from his large group of friends who he truly believed would do something so despicable. And yet Sterling had said she’d been raped by three of them.
Oh God.
Bile rose in his throat, threatening to erupt from his churning stomach. She’d been raped by three men. One was bad enough for any woman. But three? It didn’t bear thinking about. He was devastated. So heartbroken that he didn’t even know what to do, to say. How could he possibly make something like this go away? She’d live the rest of her life reliving the trauma of that event and there wasn’t a goddamn thing he could do to make it better.
Had she cried while they were holding her down? Had she called for him? Had she begged him to save her? What had she felt when she had been convinced that he had been the one to orchestrate the entire thing? And what the hell would ever give her that idea in the first place?
He was going to lose it. His hands shook around the steering wheel as he pulled back onto the road. His pulse was thumping wildly in his heart, at his neck, at his temples. The road stretched and blurred in his vision. Tears burned his eyelids and he rubbed them away with the back of one arm.
He had to keep it together. He couldn’t confront Gracie this way. Not when he wanted to rage at the world. He wanted to destroy something. He wanted the names of the men who’d done this because he would not rest until they had all paid for hurting Gracie. He would destroy every last one of them. He would not rest until justice was served.
Sweet, beautiful, good-to-her-toes Gracie. What kind of monsters would do that to her? And to somehow convince her that Zack had been behind it all? That he wanted to wash his hands of her in the worst possible fashion?
It was so sick and twisted that Zack couldn’t even comprehend such evil. From his friends. Guys he’d called friends. That they would gang up on a defenseless girl and ruthlessly torment her, degrade her and destroy her, driving her away from Zack forever.
How the hell had she made it alone? No degree. No training. No skills. On her own without anyone in the world to lean on at such a young age. God, he wanted to cry like a damn baby.
How many nights had she cried herself to sleep? How hard had it been for her to heal from such devastation without anyone to help her, to love and support her? He had been Gracie’s only source of support. No one else had given a damn about her, and in his youthful exuberance and optimism, he’d been convinced that he was all she needed. That he could provide everything for her. That she didn’t need anyone else and neither did he.
God, how wrong he’d been.
Because Gracie had no one.
Gracie thought the man who’d professed to love her had set her up for a horror no woman should ever endure.
She thought the man she’d loved had lied to her. Had played her, manipulated her, and ultimately betrayed her and thrown her away like she was nothing more than a piece of trash. Not important. Like she was no one. Like she was a nuisance and a hindrance to Zack’s life.
“Zack,” Eliza said softly, shaking him from his torturous thoughts. “You okay?”
“No,” he said, his voice cracking with emotion. “No, the hell I’m not okay. I’ll never be okay. How could I be after hearing that? She thinks I had her gang-raped by three of my friends, Lizzie. She thinks I discarded her like yesterday’s garbage. How am I supposed to ever get over that? How am I supposed to ever get her to trust me, much less love me again?”
Eliza sighed. “I’m sorry, Zack. I don’t even know what to say. This is one fucked-up situation. Any idea which ‘friends’ it could have been?”
“No. But I will find out,” he said in an icy, frigid tone that promised retribution like never before dished out. “So help me God, when I found out who touched her, who hurt her, who put their filthy goddamn hands on her, I’ll rip their fucking nuts off and shove them down their throats.”
“I’d be glad to help you,” Sterling said mildly. “I’m not without resources myself, and perhaps, as I’m not you, and the three in question would understandably be more wary around you, then I would have better luck finding out what we need to know.”
“I may take you up on that,” Zack said.
“Call me anytime. Gracie is my friend. Yes, at one time I entertained the idea that I’d like her to be more. But it was obvious she most needed a friend and so I filled that requirement. And now? I honestly do view her as a little sister, so you needn’t be worried about me influencing her one way or another.”
How ironic that a day before Zack would have gladly laid Sterling out for even breathing Gracie’s name and now the two were actually joining forces. But if everything Sterling had said was true, then Zack could only be grateful that Sterling had been there for Gracie when she needed someone so desperately. When she’d had no one else in the world.
That was over now.
Gracie might not want him but she had him. He was hers.
And by God, before it was over, regardless of whether Gracie was ever able to forgive him for what she thought he’d done, the bastards who’d hurt her would pay.
He wouldn’t rest until he’d brought his own brand of justice to his “friends.”
FIFTEEN
“JESUS,” Sterling said, his expression one of horror as he stared down at Gracie’s sleeping figure.
He lifted his gaze to Zack, who stood on the other side of the bed, shock and disbelief mirrored in his eyes.
“What kind of animal does this to a defenseless woman?”
The incredulity in his voice was echoed by Zack’s own. He didn’t get it. Maybe he never would. He saw violence and ridiculous shit every day in his line of work. But this? A cold, methodical beating meted out for the simple purpose of a message? Whatever happened to writing a letter? Or a threatening phone call, for God’s sake. Or better yet, not being a goddamn coward and bringing the fight to someone who could damn well defend themselves against such an attack.
Just come straight to the source. Bring the fight to him. He was positively itching to administer a dose of payback.
“They’re fucking cowards,” Zack said, the words rumbling through his chest.
Sterling leaned over, concern etched on his face, and he gently trailed his finger over her forehead to her cheek and then to her jaw. Zack might resent the other man’s relationship with Gracie, but he at least se
emed to genuinely care about her, so Zack couldn’t very well find fault with Sterling for being a source of support to Gracie when she needed it the most. Even as he burned with jealousy that Sterling had what he didn’t. A connection to Gracie, romantic or not.
Gracie obviously trusted Sterling, whereas Zack might never have or earn her trust again. It was a thought that formed a lead ball in his gut. His love for Gracie hadn’t diminished in twelve years, as would be the case for most people. He hadn’t been able to let go even when faced with the unlikelihood that he’d ever see her again. Never touch, kiss or simply hold her.
His biggest regret was never having made love to her. She would have given herself—her virginity—to him, but he’d wanted to wait for the sanctity of marriage. A marriage that had never happened.
He would never have disrespected Gracie by taking advantage of her. He was four years older than her, twenty to her sweet sixteen. He’d thought they had all the time in the world and that when they did make love, it would be as man and wife. Her virginity would be the most cherished of gifts. And now, to know that it had been ripped from her, with no care, no regard, none of the tenderness he’d planned? It made him so sick to his soul that it was a wound that would never heal. For her or for him.
“Zack.”
Eliza called softly from the door and he lifted his head, turning his attention away from Gracie and Sterling.
“The police are here,” she said in a low voice. “It’s the second time they’ve been here and they aren’t going to be put off this time. They want to question Gracie.”
Zack sighed. He didn’t want to upset Gracie, but the police did need to question her if anything was going to be done. Though he seriously doubted the cops would find one damn thing on the men who’d done this. It really didn’t matter, and in fact, Zack almost hoped the police wouldn’t find the bastards. He’d much rather exact his own brand of justice and personally take down every single person involved with Ari’s and Gracie’s abuse. It would sure as hell save taxpayers time and money.
“Show them in,” Zack said quietly. “Sterling is here so maybe that will put Gracie more at ease. It would appear she trusts him, if no one else.”
Eliza winced in sympathy. “This is six ways of fucked-up.”
“Tell me about it.”
Eliza ducked out and a moment later returned with detectives Briggs and Ramirez. They quietly greeted Zack and introduced themselves to Sterling when he stepped away from Gracie’s bed to meet them.
“It would be better if you woke her up,” Zack said, nearly choking on the words. “And stay with her while they question her. I’ll be here, but she’ll likely be more comfortable with you in her direct line of sight.”
Sterling nodded and then led the detectives to the bed. He glanced up at Zack in question and Zack nodded to indicate Sterling should wake her now.
Eliza moved closer to where Zack stood just inside the doorway. He was leaning against the wall where he had a clear sight path to Gracie. Eliza put her arm around his waist and gave him a fierce hug.
“I know this has to be so hard for you, Zack,” she murmured.
He hugged her to him and dropped a kiss on the top of her head. For a moment he simply held her. He needed this personal contact. The fact that he wasn’t alone was the only reason he hadn’t already lost his shit completely. As it was, he was hanging on to his sanity by the thinnest of threads.
He had to be strong for Gracie. He did her no good if he were an irrational, pissed-off ball of fury. Not to mention he’d scare the shit out of her when she was already frightened out of her mind by him.
His chest ached. His heart hurt. He wanted to be alone so he could grieve over all he’d discovered—and lost—in the last twenty-four hours. But he could do none of those things because time was of the essence and he didn’t dare give Gracie the chance to slip away or else he may never see her again. It was obvious enough that she’d planned to never cross paths with him. He would have spent the rest of his life never knowing her fate, if not for the happenstance of him recognizing the scenery in her painting.
“What if she hates me forever?” Zack whispered, confiding his deepest, most devastating fear.
Eliza squeezed him in a comforting hug. “Shhh, don’t do that to yourself. There’s no sense torturing yourself with the worst-case scenario. You’re going to have to be patient and take it one minute, one hour, one day at a time. She’s fragile. Not only are the events of the past alive and well in her mind, but now she has to contend with what happened to her now. Once is enough to break a woman. But two instances of her being attacked, being completely helpless?” She broke off, shaking her head.
“Yeah, I know,” he said in a low voice. “Damn it, Lizzie. I don’t know what to do! How am I going to convince her that I had nothing to do with her being raped?” He dragged a hand through his hair in agitation. “I don’t even know which so called friends did this to her and why. Why, for God’s sake? She never did anything to anyone. She was nothing but sweet and caring and gentle. God, it makes me sick to think of what happened to her. And I wasn’t there,” he said brokenly. “I wasn’t there to protect her. I swore I’d never let anything hurt her. And I failed her, goddamn it!”
“You couldn’t have known, Zack. Especially if they were your friends. How could you have known? You don’t think people, much less people who were your friends, have the capacity for such evil. You can’t blame yourself for what happened.”
Zack went still and straightened, homing in on Gracie’s bed as Sterling leaned over and gently began shaking her awake. The two policemen stood on Gracie’s other side, their expressions grim as they surveyed her bruised and battered face.
Gracie’s world was a haze of confusion and unease. She’d retreated into a drug-induced fog where pain and fear faded away, replaced by a false sense of security. Here she was able to block out her reality and avoid it. Things she’d sworn she’d put behind her had come storming to life the moment she’d seen him again.