Well, oowee.
I’ll be damned.
Annette had some badass to her.
“I’m under—” I started.
I didn’t get it all out because Jet went flying from the door as it was thrown open.
Everyone turned to it to see Tod, in his flight attendant uniform, tear in.
He slammed the door, looked around and snapped, “I told you I was on my way! It isn’t easy getting from DIA into town at rush hour. And you started without me!”
“Chill, sugar. We been waiting days, you know we couldn’t wait any longer,” Daisy said.
“Not even ten minutes?” Tod asked.
All the Rock Chicks (save Annette) looked guilty.
Tod turned to me. “Is he cute?”
Tod was Indy and Lee’s neighbor. Tod was one half of Tod and Stevie. Tod (and obviously Stevie) was gay.
It wasn’t that Tod was gay that he was a Rock Chick. It was arguable seeing as they swung both ways (those ways being both Hot Bunch and Rock Chick), but Tex and Duke, both who worked at Indy’s bookstore, both not gay, were also de facto Rock Chicks.
It was just how we rolled.
I didn’t know if “hot” translated to “cute” in gay-speak.
Still, I replied, “Mm-hmm.”
He leaned back and grinned. “Well, all right.”
“Tod can buy you some rubbers,” Annette declared.
Tod’s eyes got big.
At me.
“You don’t have any condoms, honey?” he asked.
“Can we give the condoms a rest?” I requested.
“I’ll talk to Eddie,” Jet murmured.
I guessed we couldn’t.
“Don’t talk to Eddie,” Indy advised swiftly.
“Why not?” Jet asked.
“Eddie’s not a big fan of buying condoms for other dudes,” Indy told her.
“Do I want to know this story?” Jet inquired.
“Sure, it’s funny,” Ally answered, also tossing herself on my bed.
“And it reminds me I might need to stock up on Lip Smackers,” Indy muttered.
“Oh for goodness sakes, I’ll buy you some condoms,” Daisy stated. She was now at my jewelry mirror, had it open, and was draping some necklaces around her neck. She turned to me. “Can I borrow these, sugar?”
“I need a drink,” Stella announced before I could give approval, or not, to Daisy’s request.
“I need three,” Tod declared, also throwing himself on my bed. “Who’s manning the cocktail shaker?”
“Shirleen, you got some chips?” Ava asked.
Did I have some chips?
I was raising teenage boys.
I had more chips then the Lays factory.
“Yeah, hey,” Annette could be heard. She was on her phone. Alarmingly. “I wanna order some pizzas.” Yep. Shirleen was alarmed. “You ready? Right. One large veggie. That’s for me,” she said this last to the room before going back to her phone. “One large pepperoni. One large sausage. We’re gonna need some of that cheesy bread. Two orders. And maybe a salad.” She got some looks. “Okay, no salad and three orders of that cheesy bread. Right. You got my account from my number? Right. Cool. Charge it on the card on file. But it’s a new address.” Her gaze came to me. “What’s the address here again?”
Ten voices told her the address.
I’ll note, none of those voices was mine.
Annette strolled to the door after giving my address, stating, “Right, thanks. Laterzzzzz.” She took the phone from her ear, opened the door and shouted, “Pizza in thirty!”
“Right on!” Sniff shouted back.
Roam had no reply.
“Oh my God! I need to borrow these shoes!” Ava wandered out of my walk-in holding my Gucci crystal embellished sandals that I’d bought on a whim because they were fancy and I had nowhere to wear them but they were just so hot I couldn’t pass them up. “Luke would love these.”
Damn.
Now I just had to give them to her.
This was because I held the knowledge that Luke Stark liked his woman in sexy shoes, and just how he liked to work things out with those sexy shoes and their heels digging in certain areas of his flesh. And now I couldn’t wear those shoes without thinking of those heels digging in Luke Stark’s flesh.
Shit.
“Bring those to me,” Tod ordered, already twisting his body in a knot to take off his own shoes. “I’m feeling those sandals. I’m feeling ‘Born This Way.’ I’m feeling ‘You Make Me Feel Mighty Real.’ I’m feeling wig number three, dress number seventeen. No. I’m feeling shopping.”
Tod, when he was not being a flight attendant, dad to a chow dog called Chowleena, partner to Stevie or the unofficially official Rock Chick wedding planner, was a drag queen called Burgundy Rose.
Ava walked the Guccis over to Tod.
I felt something touch the back of my hand.
I looked to my side.
Jules was there.
“You knew it would happen,” she said quietly.
I did.
I sighed.
“They just love you,” she continued.
They did.
I sighed again.
Jules smiled.
“I’m on cocktails,” Stella announced on her way to the door. “Who wants what?”
“I’ll help,” Sadie said, following her.
“Cosmo,” Roxie ordered.
“Surprise me,” Tod put in, bent over the side of my bed, strapping on my Gucci.
“I’m in for a cosmo, but I gotta call Eddie. Tell him he’s on his own for dinner,” Jet shared.
“He can come over,” Annette invited Jet’s husband to my house. “I’ll just call and order more pizza.”
“Tell him to go to Lincoln’s. Lee’s having a team meeting. He can meet the guys there,” Indy told Jet.
“Tell him to tell Hank,” Roxie added.
“I better call Blanca and let her know she’s got Alex for dinner,” Jet muttered.
“And I better call Nick and see if he’s down with watching Max and Sam for the foreseeable future,” Jules said, disengaging from me.
Eddie and Jet, and Jules and Vance had started their broods.
The rest would follow.
And as evidenced with what was right then happening in my bedroom, it wouldn’t slow any of them down.
I went to the closet to take off my heels and put on my slippers.
What could I say?
The Rock Chicks were in the house.
And as I’ve said, I was relatively badass, and the fact remained, I had been ticked at them.
But still.
The truth of it was . . .
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Holding It Tight
Shirleen
“WHEN THE TIME comes, sweetheart, you won’t have to worry about condoms. That’s the man’s domain.”
It was later that night.
The Rock Chicks had gone.
The boys were down in their space.
And I’d repoofed my duvet so I could unpoof it my own damned self by lying on it to talk to Moses.
Obviously, I’d told him about the Rock Chick visit.
Yes.
Even the uncomfortable parts about it.
“Great,” I murmured.
“Though it would be funny to find out how Lee Nightingale or Kai Mason would react to being asked to buy you condoms,” he went on, sounding like he thought it was funny just to think about it.
And hearing that in his voice, it got funny instead of being mortifying.
“Yeah,” I replied.
“We’re out to your girls.”
His tone was entirely different when he said that.
“Yeah,” I whispered.
“You talk me up?” he teased.
“I talked me down.”
After I said that, I could actually feel his pissed-off vibe coming at me over the phone.
“Don’t worry, honey,” I a
ssured. “They don’t like it any more than you do and didn’t mind sharing that.”
“I hope so,” he stated shortly.
I changed the subject. “Had the talk with the boys about school.”
“How’d that go?”
“Told ’em to think on it. I’ll give them time to do that and we’ll have another chat.”
“You get a sense of where they’re leaning?”
“Didn’t get that shot seeing as the Rock Chicks broke into my house before we could formally end discussions.”
I heard him chuckle.
“But that’s probably good. They tend to do better when I give them space to sort stuff out on their own,” I told him.
“Yeah,” he said.
“You have a good night with your girls?” I asked.
“We always do. They’re good girls. For them, they’re just home. For me, it’s like a reunion every time they come home. My daughters, their ages, biweekly reunions instead of them just bein’ with me every night.”
His tone was again different. And not a good different.
“Darlin’,” I whispered.
“It is what it is. But what that is doesn’t get better no matter how much time goes by.”
“Wish it was different.”
There was a silence he didn’t fill before he cleared his throat. “Haven’t shared that with anyone. Not a friend. Not even my momma.”
“Glad you felt safe sharin’ it with me.”
“Feels good to have you to share it with.”
It sure did.
Just like it felt good to have him to text when I was worried about what would happen about Roam at school, then when I was thrilled with what happened about Roam.
I’d never had anything like that with Leon. I’d learned early never to share a fear or a sorrow, and there weren’t any triumphs worth sharing. He catalogued any weakness and had a specific skill where he’d time it just right to use them against you when he could make the most damage.
“What’re you thinkin’?” Moses asked.
“I was thinkin’ that Leon used vulnerabilities against you, so I learned not to share them.”
He said nothing to that.
So I spoke.
“I’m sorry, Moses. I get use to this, there’ll come a time when I don’t compare him to you.”
“I wasn’t quiet because of that, baby. I was quiet because I was trying to get a rein on bein’ pissed he was such a humongous jackass and you had to live for years with that.”
That didn’t make it any better.
“Maybe we should be a Leon Free Zone,” I suggested.
“Why?”
“It messes with me and pisses you off.”
“How you gonna work through what he did to you if you don’t get it out?”
Good question.
“Might be time to make somethin’ else clear about the us I want us to build, Shirleen,” he declared. “And that’s the fact we gotta be real. We gotta talk. We gotta share. We gotta be there to help the other work shit out and we gotta be open to talk so we can get on working our own shit out.”
And here we were.
Again.
“This is where it gets scary because I got more shit to work out than you do,” I pointed out.
“If you think I got the job I got lookin’ after the kids I see every day and I don’t take that home with me and need somewhere to unload it, you’re wrong. I been doing that job a long time, and most of the time I can handle it. Sometimes, some kids, it gets under your skin and I need to work it out.”
“Who do you work it out with now?” I asked curiously.
“Who do you work Leon out with now?” he returned.
“Mm,” I hummed.
“Yeah,” he agreed.
And there it was.
Alone was alone in the way we’d both been alone, even having people in our lives.
And it could suck for anyone.
“Never had this,” I said softly. “Even with all my girls, who would listen, I didn’t wanna bog them down with it. So I never had this.”
“Me either,” he replied. “Even when I had my wife, I didn’t give this to her because she wasn’t real interested, and then we had our babies and I didn’t bring it home. But it didn’t matter. I’d learned by then she wasn’t real interested.”
One could say I would not have been a big fan of the woman who cheated on Moses Richardson and broke his heart.
But seriously.
She was sounding like a real asshole.
“Got no reply to that?” Moses asked.
“I’m pleading the fifth before I say anything super ugly about the mother of your children.”
“You know, you aren’t the only one comparing, Shirleen.”
Oh boy.
“I don’t want to make the same mistakes either,” he shared.
I hadn’t thought about that.
But it sure made sense.
And I hoped to God Moses never thought of me as a mistake.
“I hear that, honey,” I murmured.
“Now, I don’t wanna let you go but I’m gonna let you go, because it’s getting late and my girls haven’t gone to sleep yet. I need to see where they’re at. I’ll call you tomorrow. And we’ll set something up if we can this week. If we can’t do that, I want to be on your calendar first chance I got. Next Friday night. Yeah?”
Oh yeah.
“Yes,” I agreed.
“Take you out somewhere nice so I can see you in another pretty dress.”
I could totally do that.
“I’ll look forward to that, Moses.”
“Great, baby. You sleep well.”
“You too, darlin’.”
“’Night, Shirleen.”
“Goodnight, Moses.”
We hung up and I looked at my feet in their slippers.
I still didn’t know how this was happening, me sitting on my bed in my slippers talking to a handsome man about life and our kids and our pasts, and what we wanted in our futures.
I just knew it was happening.
And I was beginning to believe I deserved it.
So I quit looking at my feet in their slippers.
And I started smiling at them.
“You got what on your face?” Moses asked.
“Purple goo.”
“Purple goo?”
“A facial. And it’s gettin’ on my phone. Can I call you back in twenty?”
“It takes twenty minutes to wash purple goo off your face?”
It was the next night.
Moses and I were on the phone again.
He’d texted me that morning to say he’d call that night after talking to the girls.
I’d texted him back to say I’d be looking forward to that call.
He’d then texted me with five options of where we could have dinner Friday night.
I’d texted him to share I liked all five options and it was his choice.
He’d then texted me to ask if it was appropriate for a girl to have three drawers full of makeup and still think she needed more.
I texted him back to give him the news it wasn’t only appropriate, it should be encouraged.
He texted to share he wasn’t sure he agreed with that.
It was then, me, Shirleen, texted him a tearing-up-laughing emoji.
He’d texted back a smiley-face emoji.
Shit, we were emoji-ing.
Emoji-ing!
Now it was later and he’d called in the middle of a facial.
So I needed to call him back.
“It takes twenty minutes for it to work its magic and then it takes thirty seconds to wash it off,” I educated him. “You called right after I brushed it on.”
“Just put me on speakerphone.”
Oh.
Right.
That’d be the smart way to play it.
I took the phone from my ear and put him on speakerphone.
“You’re on speaker,” I declared.
/>
Through the speaker, I heard him chuckle.
Boy, a woman could fall in love with that sound.
After he quit doing that, he asked, “Have a good day?”
“You ever tried herding badasses?”
“I spend my days herding kids who think they’re badasses, does that count?”
“I’ll introduce you to Luke Stark. Then you can tell me your guess at how he reacts to me tellin’ him to sit his ass down and write out his time sheets.”
Another chuckle.
Yes, a woman could fall in love with that sound.
Okay.
Would it sound too eager for me to bring it up?
Damn.
I was just going to bring it up.
He wanted us open. Real.
I still tried for casual.
“So did you talk to your girls?”
“Yeah. Though Judith has a study date, here, with her boyfriend Wednesday night, other than that, it’s father-daughter time.”
I was happy for him he had that.
But I found it disappointing.
“We can have phone dates,” he said.
“I’ll take it,” I whispered.
“I’m glad, baby,” he whispered back.
“And just to say, I hear you, my man, about this boy Judith is dating. Roam dates white girls. He dates some sisters, but mostly he dates white girls. Sniff, however, sees black girls. Almost exclusive. There’s a white girl here and there, but I’m sensing the sister is just his type. But I got an issue with Roam when he’s with a white girl, and I don’t got an issue with Sniff, because he sees the beauty of a sister. And I know that’s messed up. It’s just the way I feel.”
“Yeah. And I just want her to be happy. This kid, his name is Jaxon, with an X, by the way.”
“Oh boy,” I muttered.
“Yeah,” he said. “It’s not there. To him Judith is a pretty girl. She’s his girlfriend. He’s not weird with me. They’re just people.”
“World fucks that up when you get older,” I noted.
“Right. And I don’t wanna be the one who fucks that up. I don’t want to be the one who points it out that he’s dating a black girl and he needs to get her culture, her people, and respect it when that isn’t on his radar.”
“It’s gotta be partially on his radar, Moses, unless he’s blind.”
“I’m not sure it is. He’s just really into her.”
I couldn’t even stop myself from uttering, “Gulk.”