Oh, I’d felt a pale kind of desire when Gerald and I were first together, which is probably the main reason I had stayed with him. That feeling had faded quickly, however until, even when we made love, I felt almost nothing. Gerald’s hands and mouth on me—when he bothered to try and get me aroused—felt like someone touching me with thick gloves on. My body simply didn’t react to him—or to any man.
Well, it was sure as hell reacting now. And even though I knew it was wrong, I didn’t want it to stop. Didn’t want the elusive, amazing feeling I’d been reading about, watching on TV and the movies, and hearing everyone talk about for years to disappear. I continued to kiss Grav, completely in his arms now with my hands stroking his horns which seemed to have grown somehow.
Amazing! was all I could think. Amazing—it’s true! I thought all those stupid movies and books were lying but they weren’t. It’s all true!
I didn’t know why my body had never reacted to the touch of a man before. At first I had considered that I might be a lesbian, but my body didn’t react with desire when I was near women either, even pretty ones. Then I thought maybe I might be asexual, as I had read some people were. That seemed the most likely explanation although I was too ashamed to admit it, even to my best friends Zoe and Charlotte. I had gone for years pretending I was normal—to myself, my friends, my husband…and now, for the first time, I didn’t have to pretend anymore.
I finally felt it. Felt the passion.
I felt passion when Grav touched me—when he kissed me. I felt more than passion—I felt like I was ready to explode.
More, was all I could think. I want more…more!
To my surprise and disappointment, the big alien was the one who ended the kiss. He pulled away from me and when he did, I thought I saw a spark of red, down deep in his bottomless white-on-black eyes.
“Sorry,” he growled, his deep voice coming out rough and hoarse. “I, uh…I don’t know how…why I fuckin’ did that.”
“Why did you stop?” I demanded. My body was aching—throbbing with a need I had never felt before. I knew I sounded pushy and demanding but I didn’t care. I just didn’t want that feeling to end!
“My…” He coughed and cleared his throat. “My horns. You were, uh, pulling on them. They’re uh, sensitive.”
I looked at his horns—I had been right earlier, they definitely seemed to have grown. Then he shifted in his seat and my eyes flicked down to his crotch. There was a long, hard ridge that ran down the inside of his tight, black leather trousers. Oh, so his horns weren’t the only thing that had gotten bigger.
What’s wrong with you? whispered that reproving little voice in my head. Look what you did! But it wasn’t so much what I had done that upset me—it was what I had wanted to do. What I still wanted to do if I was honest with myself.
What would it feel like, I wondered. What would it feel like to make love with someone besides Gerald? Someone you actually felt something for—who made your body react when he touched you?
For a moment I pictured it—being with Grav, his huge muscular body poised above mine, entering me slowly as I pressed up to meet him, begging for more…
The mental image filled me with desire and shame at the same time. Lustful, whispered that reproving voice. Disgusting and wrong and lustful! This time I thought it sounded like my strict grandmother, the one who used to smack my hand during Sunday dinner if she thought my table manners weren’t good enough.
“I’m sorry,” I told Grav, as the shame began to win over the desire and the wonderful feeling began to melt away like a sudden snow on a hot day. “I…I don’t know what came over me.”
“Me either.” He sounded at least as confused as I felt. “I, uh, didn’t mean to take advantage.”
“If anything I’m the one who took advantage.” I looked down at my hands, aware that my body was still throbbing with the remains of the deep, flooding desire that had almost overwhelmed me a few moments before. “You were just trying to heal me. I sort of…went crazy. I…” I looked up at him. “You have to believe me, I’ve never done anything like that before.”
“I believe you, darlin’.” His deep voice was surprisingly gentle. “Look, don’t worry about it. Let’s just let bygones be bygones and I’ll get you back down to Earth. At least your face is all healed now.”
“Is it?” I put my fingertips to my cheek. It no longer throbbed and the cut place above my eyebrow didn’t sting either—both felt completely healed. As for my mouth—it was still swollen, but not from the beating Gerald had given me. No, it felt tender and bruised from the passionate kisses I’d just shared with the big alien.
Once again I wondered what was wrong with me.
“Yup, all healed.” Grav nodded approvingly although I noticed that the bulge between his legs still hadn’t gone down. In fact, it still looked absolutely huge. “Um…” Grav’s eyes followed mine and he saw where I was staring. “Sorry,” he muttered, shifting in his seat. “I, uh…can’t help it.”
Oh God, this was just getting more and more awkward! I couldn’t be looking between his legs! I needed to get out of here!
“Do…do you mind if I take a look?” I said.
“What?” His eyes dipped down to his crotch again. “You want to—”
“Oh, no! No-no-no!” I could feel my cheeks getting hotter and hotter with mortification. This situation was just getting worse and more embarrassing by the second! “At my face. I meant I want to go look at my face and see how you healed me,” I said, the words falling out of my mouth in a tumble.
“Oh. Oh, sure—of course. There’s a viewer next to the com-link.” He jerked his head in the direction of the corridor we’d come from. “Help yourself.”
“Thanks.” I got to my feet on shaky legs and stumbled ungracefully by him out into the hallway. I still felt a little weak and dizzy from the kiss we’d shared but I made myself take a deep breath and look for the viewer he’d talked about.
I found it hanging on the wall, right outside a room which had to be the control area of the ship. It looked like a kind of cockpit with an array of controls and a windshield that showed the blackness of space.
It made me feel sick and surreal to see it and realize that this strange adventure I was on was no dream, no matter how strange and dreamlike it felt.
Trying to ignore my feelings, I turned to the viewer which was the same kind as the one I had seen in the bathroom earlier. Mounted on the wall beside it was a strange looking piece of equipment that looked like a smooth, black box with recessed lights winking inside it. Was that the com-link Grav had talked about? Well, whatever—I was more interested in the viewer.
I flipped it on, using the buttons with more ease this time and saw a very different image from the last time I had looked at my reflection.
My face was healed—not just healing but actually, completely healed.
I gave a little gasp as my fingers explored the places my injuries had been. I’d been swollen and battered and bruised just a few minutes before and now…nothing. I looked like nothing had ever happened.
In fact, I looked better than that—I looked good. My eyes were bright and starry and my skin seemed to be actually glowing a little bit. Was that even possible? There was a faint, pretty pink blush to my cheeks, my lips were full and red and pouty. Even my hair looked perfect—shiny and glossy and lustrous—like I was a model out of a shampoo commercial.
“Wow,” I muttered to myself, still running my fingertips over my face. “Amazing.” Apparently lust and guilt agreed with me, although I couldn’t think how. How had Grav managed to do all this just by licking my face?
And more importantly, how had he managed to make me feel things I’d never expected to feel?
As I looked at myself in the mirror, my mind whirled with questions.
How had things happened so fast between us? What was it I felt when he touched me and why had I never been able to feel it before? Would I ever feel it agai
n?
It doesn’t matter—none of it does, I told myself sternly. Because you’re not going to act on this…this feeling or whatever it is. You’re going to go back down to Earth and take care of your personal business and forget this ever happened.
I knew it was what I should do, even if part of me wished I didn’t have to. Even if part of me wished I could stay with Grav and explore this elusive, amazing sensation.
I felt like I’d been colorblind all my life, listening to people talk about rainbows and suddenly someone had showed me one. Would I ever see another if I left this ship, if I let Grav slip out of my life?
I just didn’t know.
Suddenly my own face disappeared in a blur of static and a new face took its place.
Chapter Seven
Leah
“Oh!” I gasped, jumping back in surprise as I stared at the viewer which had so lately been displaying my own features. Now it was showing me a complete stranger.
The new face looked like an old man. He had wrinkled cheeks and thinning gray hair that barely covered his boney scalp. In fact, he looked like any senior citizen I might expect to see on Earth…except his skin was light green and his eyes were deep purple.
“Hello?” he demanded in a high, quavering voice. “Hello, can you hear me? Please, this is an urgent message!”
“Um…I hear you,” I said. “Are you calling for Grav?”
“I am calling for the Protector of my granddaughter—Gravex N’gol,” he said. “I have to…have to tell him…” Suddenly he broke down. Putting his face in his hands, he sobbed, his boney shoulders shaking so hard I wished I could reach through the viewer and comfort him.
“Sir?” I said tentatively. “Are…are you all right?”
“I’m sorry.” He looked up, his purple eyes red from crying. “I just…I thought she’d be safe. I should have listened to Grav—I never should have dissolved his contract with her. And now it may be too late!”
“What is it? What happened?”
Grav must have heard the poor old man’s weeping because he suddenly appeared behind me, his face grim.
“Principae Kiv’orop,” he said, frowning. “Why are you calling me on my private line?”
“Oh, Gravex, please! You have to help me—it’s Teeny! She’s been taken again!”
“What?” Grav demanded. “How did that happen? You swore to me you hired the best retinue of guards possible to take her to that damn finishing school on Gemina.”
“I did and she got there safely,” the weeping man Grav had called Principae Kiv’orop moaned. “She was doing well in her studies and making friends with the other girls—so said Madam DuFrein, the director of the academy! But then…but then…”
“What?” Grav was still frowning but there was anxiety in his white-on-black eyes. “What happened?”
“There was a raid!” The old man started crying harder than ever. “The school authorities don’t know how the raiders got past the planet’s defenses but somehow they did.”
“Who did they take? Was it slavers looking for eligible females?” Grav sounded like he knew exactly what he was talking about—as though this kind of thing was a common occurrence. I shivered at the thought.
“No! They weren’t normal raiders—at least, they didn’t ask for ransom of any kind. And they only took Teeny—no one else.”
Grav grunted thoughtfully. “Sounds politically motivated. “You think maybe it was paid for by one of the other ruling families? Someone else in line for the Thonolin throne?”
“It’s possible but…I’m not sure.” The old man shook his head. “They said—Madam DuFrein said…”
“Said what? Spit it out, man!”
“Most of the raiders were T’varri.” He stopped for a moment to blow his nose on a bright green handkerchief.
Grav nodded. “Well, I know that’s frightening but T’varri males are generally honorable. They won’t bother Teeny—she’s not of age. Their males demand complete submission from their females but not until they’re bonded. Teeny isn’t old enough to bond with anyone yet.”
“It’s not the T’varri that worry me!” Kiv’orop said, swiping at his eyes. “One of Teeny’s teachers tried to stop them from taking her. As I said, most of the raiders were T’varri but some were wearing masks. Madam DuFrein said this teacher pulled one of their masks off and they saw…they saw…”
He shook his head, another sob wracking his skinny frame. I wondered what in the world could have been under the mask.
Grav waited patiently until the man got control of himself.
“What did they see when the teacher pulled off the mask, Principae?” he asked quietly.
“The masked raider was a Biter!” Kiv’orop burst out. “Do you hear me, a Biter!” And they have reason to believe that the other masked ones were Biters as well.”
“What makes them think so?” Grav asked, frowning.
“Because they ate the teacher alive! Right in front of the class!” The old man burst into tears again. “Do you know what this means? My granddaughter is in the care of a hoard of Biters.”
“That’s bad. Fuckin’ bad.” Grav was looking more and more worried. “Which direction did they go when they left? Did anyone see? Does anyone know anything?”
The old man shook his head.
“No one except for the female guard I hired to ward Teeny and she won’t talk. I’ve tried to have her extradited to Thonolax. But Gemina, the planet the Academy is located on, has a strict no-extradition policy, especially between males and females. They are a safe haven planet and the guard is using that to stay where she is—she’s being held in the Temple of the Goddess. And you know I can’t go there myself as they don’t allow any males.”
Grav threw up his hands. “Well what do you expect me to do? I’m a male too—it’s why you dissolved my contract in the first place when you decided to send Teeny to that Goddess-forsaken planet!”
“I don’t know…I don’t know.” The old man started weeping again. “I guess I thought maybe you could…could disguise yourself somehow. Get in to interview the guard and find out where they took my Teeny.”
Grav sighed. “Look, I’m not exactly the kinda male who can pass as a female, you know?”
“But you could find a way! Please, Gravex, you have to save her! Look—this is my last message from her.” Kiv’orop held up a crystal cube, exactly like the one Grav had shown me that had Zoe’s message on it. He pressed it and an image of a slender little girl who looked to be somewhere between ten and twelve suddenly appeared, hovering over it in hologram form. She had thick black hair, pale, delicate looking sage-green skin, and big, starry violet eyes.
“Hello, Grandpapa,” she began in a subdued voice. “I’m recording this to let you know I’m doing well at the Starshine Finishing Academy. The teachers here are nice but…” She looked over her shoulder, as if to make sure that no one was listening. “But I don’t like Haenah, the guard you hired to take Grav’s place.” She lowered her voice and hunched her shoulders. “She’s mean, Grandpapa. She pinches me and trips me when she thinks no one is looking. She hurts me.”
I heard a low growl rising from Grav’s throat at this. Cutting my eyes to the left, I saw the look on his face—it was murderous with rage. Clearly anyone who hurt Teeny would have to answer to him.
On the viewscreen, the message was still going on.
Teeny swiped at her eyes, which, even on the holo, I could see were filling with tears. “Grav never hurt me—he made me feel better when I was sad. He protected me and saved me after Grandmama was killed. Please, Grandpapa—can’t you hire him to ward me again instead of Haenah? She…she doesn’t even do a very good job. She’s always talking to some male on her com-u. She—”
Suddenly there was a pounding sound that sounded like someone knocking on a door.
“Hey? What’s that you’re doing, you little brat? Who’re you talking to in there?” demanded a harsh, f
emale voice.
Teeny’s eyes got wide and frightened.
“No one. I was just…listening to music,” she called over her shoulder.
“Well, hurry up! You can’t stay in there all night. It’s lights out in five,” the voice snapped.
“Yes, Haenah. I’ll be out soon, I promise.”
Teeny turned back to the cube and swiped again at her eyes.
“Sorry, Grandpapa. I have to go now—if I stay in the fresher any longer I’ll get in trouble.”
In the background, the pounding started again.
“I said, hurry up!” snarled the angry female voice. “I don’t have all night! I have a call coming in from Arn and your skinny little ass is damn well going to be tucked in bed before he calls or I’ll beat it!”
“Yes, Haenah!”
Teeny reached forward with one hand and the cube went suddenly blank.
“You see?” Kiv’orop looked up from the cube. “She asked for you, Grav. You found her before when Tazaxx’s men took her—I’m certain you’re the only one who can find her now. Please!”
“Gods, my poor little Teeny…” Grav rubbed his temples, just below his horns, looking like an anxious father, I thought. “This Arn, the male the guard mentioned, you think he and the guard—this Haenah— planned the raid?”
Kiv’orop shrugged helplessly. “It’s possible. As I said, no one can get anything out of Haenah. And I can’t get to her to question her myself.”
“And you think I can?” Grav growled in obvious frustration. “I might be able to do somethin’ about my appearance if I could get my hands on an image generator but nothing’s gonna hide my voice. I just don’t know…”
“I’ll help,” I said.
“What?” Grav looked at me and I could tell he’d forgotten I was even there.
“I said, I’ll help.” I lifted my chin. “This little girl—she was your, uh, the one you protected before you came to watch over me—right?”
“My ward. Right, she was.” He rubbed his temples again. “But, Leah, I can’t ask you to—”