by Roni Loren
Everything in the room was spinning, her skin like ice. Assault charges and hard proof that Kade was rough with women. He may never see his daughter again if all this got out. She swallowed past the jagged knot in her throat. “What do you want, Doug?”
He gave her a sharp-toothed grin and slapped his thighs. “Now, we’re talking. There’s my practical Tessa.”
She wanted to vomit on his expensive shoes.
“I will drop the charges and give you these pictures if you agree to come back to Atlanta with me. You’ll give Marilyn an exclusive interview and tell everyone that I never cheated. Tell them that you were the one who strayed in the marriage because you’re into this demented S&M shit. But you’re ready to come back to me, get help, and work on putting our marriage back together. And you will beg my forgiveness in front of the congregation on the live Sunday broadcast.”
The walls around her seemed to shrink inward, pressing on her. He wanted her to go back to Atlanta with him? She’d rather be dead. But if she didn’t do something, Doug would annihilate Kade’s chances with his daughter and his reputation. She couldn’t do that to Kade. Wouldn’t. Last time she’d had to make a choice between herself and Kade, she’d chosen the easiest path for her. But she refused to hurt the man she loved, maybe had always loved, again.
“I can’t be your wife again,” she whispered, almost more to herself.
“Sure you can,” he said, malice underlying his easy tone. “You know how to put on a happy face. You’ll get your nice house back, a generous allowance in your account each month. You can drop this ridiculous pauper’s lifestyle you’ve been trying out. I’ll even throw some money at your precious charity. All you’ll need to do is turn your head and keep your mouth shut if you see something you shouldn’t. Isn’t that what you’re setting yourself up for with Kaden anyway? You get to be his little whore and he takes care of everything for you? You strive to be useless. It’s always been your career goal.”
She lifted her head, wishing she could kill him with the look she shot at him. “If you think so poorly of me, why do you want me in your life again? Get Marilyn to divorce her husband and marry her.”
“Marilyn will never leave him. He has more money than I do. Plus, she’s stated publicly that she’s an atheist. I can’t have that in my church. And maybe I won’t need her around anymore anyway. I’m thinking you may be more fun to be around now. I tried to treat you well before, respect you like a wife. But I see now that you needed something different. If you want to be treated like my whore, I can happily oblige you.”
The up and down look made her feel like bugs were running over her skin. She wrapped her arms around herself. “You will never touch me. Never. Do you understand? I’ll go with you, but you’re not ever allowed in my bed.”
He smiled. “That’s going to get mighty lonely for you. We’ll see how long you last. But I can agree to that for now, if you come with me this morning.”
“Now? I can’t. I need to go to the police station and see Kade. Tell him I’m leaving.”
“No,” he said, standing and smoothing his slacks. “You don’t get to talk this out with him. Pack a suitcase. We have a flight that leaves in two and a half hours. He can figure it out. He’s used to you walking away from him to be with me.”
The statement was like a slap across her cheek.
“And if you think you actually mean something to him, you’re deluding yourself. Men don’t marry women they fuck like dogs. They use them. That’s all he’s doing with you. You’re his temporary diversion. Another slut will step up in line behind you.”
She ignored the insults he was lobbing her way. “I’m not telling anyone anything until you drop the charges and give me those pictures.”
He smiled. “When we land in Atlanta, I’ll call the police station and will give you the pictures then. You can also verify that Marilyn deleted them from her phone.”
“Fine.”
“Now go pack. I don’t want to be late.”
She pushed up from the chair to stalk toward her bedroom.
“And sweetheart—”
She turned to glare at him.
“I so can’t wait to see you on your knees in front of the congregation. I’m starting to see the appeal Kade finds in putting you in that position.”
“Fuck you, Doug.”
“I’m sure you will. Soon,” he said with smarmy confidence.
She was glad she didn’t have a gun in the house because, right now, life in prison was sounding worth it.
THIRTY
“What do you mean she’s gone?” Kade asked, once again, standing in Sam’s doorway and praying the woman would help him. He’d already been to Tessa’s house to find it locked up and her car sitting in the driveway. She wasn’t answering her phone. And she’d been a no show at the police station the day before. He’d been climbing the walls with worry waiting to get the bail processed so he could get out. Then this morning, they’d let him out saying the charges had been dropped.
“She’s in Atlanta,” Sam said, lines of strain around her mouth. “She called me a few hours ago.”
“Atlanta? Fuck. Why would she go back there?” Then a sickening realization wrapped around him. “What did that asshole do?”
“I don’t know the whole story, but I’m guessing there’s a reason charges were dropped for you.”
“Christ.” He scraped a hand through his hair. “She didn’t need to go anywhere with him. I would’ve handled it. He’d have to prove it in court, and I don’t care if he claims to have a witness or not.”
“She was worried about your custody case. And honestly, I think he’s holding more over her than the charges. She wouldn’t have gone with him easily.”
His fists curled at the thought of Doug laying one finger on Tessa or threatening her in any way. He would kill the sonofabitch. “I’m going to get her.”
Sam’s hand darted out, grabbing him before he could leave. “Hold up.”
“Don’t try to talk me out of this, Sam. You don’t know what that guy is capable of. He’s demented, sick, and cruel.” Flashes of the night Doug had jumped him in high school flickered through his mind in painful succession, ripping open old scars he thought long healed. “She can’t be near him.”
“Look, you don’t have to convince me of that. But she gave me specific instructions to tell you not to come. She needs a little time. She has to take care of some things, and you’ll only get in the way.”
“In the way?” The words stung. “I can’t let her stay there with him. He could hurt her. She needs my help.”
Sam’s expression turned sympathetic. “I know how you feel, believe me. I’ve been sick about it since she called me. But she said to tell you to trust her, to focus on keeping your image clean for the courts. That she has a plan and can handle herself. And you know, I think she can. She’s a lot tougher than she used to be.”
He leaned back against the wall. Trust. Letting her handle herself. He could deal with the first. He did trust her. But he also knew she could put herself at more risk than she realized with Doug. He’d never told her or anyone the extent of what had really happened that night. Everyone knew he’d been beaten up. The groundskeeper had found him naked, bloodied, and hog-tied behind the bleachers on the football field the morning after and word had spread fast. But no one else had seen how broken he’d been; no one knew how cruel Doug had gotten.
He’d been too damaged, humiliated, and disgusted afterward to cope. He hadn’t been able to bear the thought of Tessa seeing him that way. Of anyone seeing him like that. It felt like the shame of that night was printed on his skin, like everyone would see all his secrets just by looking at him. So when he’d left home, he’d closed that chapter of his life and tried to forget it. But now blind panic filled him, knowing Tessa was with Doug. Doug who was capable of far more tha
n verbal abuse.
“She’s not safe with him,” he said, rubbing his hand over his forehead. “I have to get to her.”
“Kade—” Sam called.
But he was already striding away, the visions of that horrific night coming back. Back then, he’d let Tessa go because he couldn’t face her after what happened. Yes, she’d turned away from him, rejected him in front of everyone, but he’d seen in her eyes that it was killing her. He could’ve stayed in school and given her time, tried to convince her again. But after that night, he didn’t want to think about her or anything related to that night. He couldn’t even look in the mirror until the visible scars had faded. Everything would cause a flashback, a spiral into darkness. So he’d slammed the door shut.
All this time she thought she’d abandoned him for Doug. But in truth, he’d abandoned her. He’d been broken and full of rage and couldn’t get past it. He’d left her there with him even knowing who Doug was, praying she’d move on when she heard Doug had beaten Kade. But he hadn’t done anything to protect her from that sick fuck. He’d run and protected himself instead. He’d given up.
1996
Kaden’s chest pulled tight as he headed up to the brightly lit house in a cul-de-sac of one of the nicer neighborhoods in town. The music could be heard drifting on the breeze, but not enough to make a neighbor call in a noise complaint. Toby Wallace was a professional party giver. He’d cover all the bases to make sure they didn’t get a visit from the cops. At least that’s what Kaden had heard. He’d never actually been to one of his parties. But Tessa was here. So this is where he needed to be.
Maybe if things were different. Tessa had said those magic words, and the statement hadn’t stopped running through his head since he’d left her house the night before. But when he’d tried to set up a time to talk to her tonight, she’d told him that she had to go to a party.
With Doug.
She hadn’t said the last part, but he’d known it. She wouldn’t have gone to a house party solo. But this couldn’t wait. He needed to talk to her tonight.
He loved her. He knew without a doubt and was ready to do anything to show her why she should be with him. He only hoped he could get her alone to talk and that it was enough. He checked to make sure no one was around to see and slipped through the gate into the backyard. He hadn’t been invited to this party. Hell, he wasn’t invited to any of the parties. But he hoped he could blend in well enough if the crowd was from a few different schools.
Kids were crowded around the pool, most had beer in their hands. There was laughing and guys shoving each other, joking around. Girls stood nearby, giggling at their antics. To Kaden it was like turning on the National Geographic channel and observing a society he wasn’t a member of. He stayed in the shadows for a good while, watching the crowd, picking out who he recognized and who was from another school. If he could latch on to a group going inside, he may be able to slip in unnoticed.
But before he had the chance, he saw Tessa step out into the backyard with a few of her girlfriends. Unlike her friends who had wine coolers in their hands, she was carrying a Dr Pepper. Probably because she knew she’d have to drive Doug’s drunk ass home. She smiled at something one of the girls said, but she looked bored, distant.
He waited for her to go off on her own, but the girls were traveling in a pack just like at school. He sighed, knowing he was going to have to suck it up and risk being seen because they weren’t going to leave her side. But what did he have to lose? At worst, she’d ignore him or laugh for the sake of her friends. With one last deep breath, he moved out of the shadow of the hedges and headed her way.
One of her friends, Lexi, noticed him before Tess did. She curled her lip. “What is he doing here?”
Tessa turned, her eyes going wide, her expression panicked. “I don’t know.”
He walked over to the lounge chair she was sitting on. “Hey, y’all know where the d-d-drinks are?”
“Oh my God. Are you even invited?” Lexi asked. “No way Toby invited you.”
“Here, I’ll get you another drink, Tessa. This one looks like it isn’t c-c-cold anymore.”
She sucked in a breath when he wrapped his hand around the soda she was holding. The note he’d tucked in his hand slid into hers. She immediately closed her fist.
“Get the hell away from her,” said a voice from behind him. Doug, of fucking course.
Kaden lifted his hands in a surrender motion and turned toward Doug with a snide smile. “No problem. J-j-just trying to be helpful to the homecoming queen. Don’t want her drink getting hot.”
“Well, j-j-just get the f-f-fuck out of here,” he said, spitting with the stuttered words. “I’ll take care of her drinks. You don’t belong here, freak.”
“Leave him alone, Doug,” Tessa cut in. “He was trying to be nice.”
“Yeah, sure he was.” Doug said, sitting down next to Tessa and draping his arm around her like some gorilla marking his territory. “It has nothing to do with the fact that when he leaned forward to get your drink, he could probably see straight down that top you’re wearing. I told you it was too low cut. You’re bringing out the perverts, babe.”
Kaden’s teeth ground against each other. This guy was such a freaking asshole. Kaden tossed the drink on the ground and turned to head out of the yard. “This party’s l-l-lame anyway.”
The group laughed behind him. But he didn’t give a shit. All he cared about was Tess reading that note.
Fifteen minutes later, Tessa met him at the corner of the neighborhood’s kiddie park. She wrung her hands and kept looking over her shoulder, the moonlight making her look even more drawn and worried. Finally, she pinned him with a stare and wrapped her arms around herself. “What are you doing here? And we need to get out from under the streetlight.”
He took her arm and guided her to a darker spot over by the swing set. She sat on one of the swings and dragged her feet through the mulch.
“Where’s Doug?” he asked, even though it hurt to say the shithead’s name.
“Distracted with his friends.”
“I guess you didn’t tell him anything about what happened last n-n-night.”
She rolled her lips inward and shook her head. “I can’t, Kaden. You know that. I told you.”
“You told me if things were d-d-different, your answer to that may be different.”
She blew out a tired breath. “But things aren’t different.”
He pulled an envelope out of his jacket pocket. “What if they were?”
She eyed the envelope warily. “What’s that?”
“I’ve been working since freshman year—tutoring, cutting grass, whatever anyone would p-p-pay me for. I’ve saved every cent for when I go to college. I have over four-thousand dollars in a lockbox in my room, and I know my mom has saved up a little for me on the side that she hasn’t told my stepdad about. I’ve looked into living expenses. I can get an apartment near campus for a few hundred bucks a m-m-month. It’s not going to be fancy or anything, but I can get a two-bedroom. Plus, I’ll get a work-study position, so I’ll be bringing in more money after that. And there’s a community college nearby. These are all the printouts with the information about the school.” He handed her the envelope. “You’ll qualify for financial aid, and it’s not that expensive to take classes there. Especially when you w-w-won’t have to worry about rent and stuff. You can stay with me for free.”
She blinked, peeking down again at the envelope. “Kaden—”
“And I’m not saying you have to d-date me or whatever. I’m not doing this to make you do that. Though, if you want to, you know how I feel.”
She stared at him, shaking her head, her expression stunned. “Why are you doing this?”
He ran a hand over the back of his head, more nervous than he could ever remember being in his life. “
I l-l-love you, Tess.”
She closed her eyes like the words had caused physical pain. “Kaden.”
But he could see the tears welling when she lifted her eyes to him again, and he stepped forward into her space and kneeled down in the dirt in front of the swing. He folded the envelope and tucked it in the back pocket of her shorts. She didn’t back away or flinch when he moved his hands to her waist so he kept talking. “I don’t want you to be with Doug just because he can help you with money. He doesn’t deserve you. I can t-t-take care of you.”
She was shaking in his hold. “I can’t ask you to do that. It’s your money. Your life. You worked hard for all of it.”
“And none of it means shit without you, T-Tess. I can’t picture next year without you there. But if you can stand here and tell me that you don’t have f-f-feelings for me, too, I’ll leave you be. I will never try to touch you again. My offer for coming to Dallas and sharing my place stands either way.”
Her tears fell down her cheeks when she blinked this time, her green eyes big and sad in the moonlight. “I can’t just go with you.”
“You can, Tess. All you have to do is say y-yes. Come with me. I c-c-can’t buy you fancy shit like he can, but I can p-promise I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”
He kneeled there, bracing for the gauntlet of no. But instead of finishing her no like he expected her to, she leaned forward and kissed him. The feel of her lips against his made his stomach turn over with relief and pure happiness. She wasn’t running. He’d changed things. Really changed them. It’d worked. He’d made things different.
He slid his hands into her hair and her lips parted, letting him deepen the kiss. God, she was so sweet and pliable in his hold, so goddamned perfect. She could be his. He’d gotten the girl of his dreams. Something would finally work out.