Brynn felt sick with disgust.
“May I stay?” Alice asked again.
Brynn nodded toward the cot she had ordered brought in for herself and set against the far wall. “Sleep there.”
“No, I will be fine here by the fire.”
“Take the cot. I’m strong and healthy and not three months gone with child. I will have another cot brought in tomorrow.” When Alice didn’t move, she said sharply, “Now!”
Alice hurried toward the cot.
Adwen’s chamber was large, but it would soon be filled to overflowing, Brynn thought wearily. She knew she should not have spoken harshly to Alice, but she had suddenly been overwhelmed by the realization that here was still another of Richard’s victims she could not leave behind at his mercy. How was she to free herself and return to Gwynthal if she must worry about these poor women’s safety? Well, it must be done, but she would dismiss it from her mind that night.
Had she heard something? She turned sharply toward the bed but could see no movement. She swiftly crossed the room. Malik was clearly deep in sleep, so the sound must have come from Adwen. Yet Adwen lay perfectly still.…
Adwen’s eyes were open and glittering with tears. “Brynn …”
Dear God, could this night bring any more turmoil? “You heard?” she whispered as she sat down on the bed and gathered Adwen’s hands in hers. “Don’t weep. Everything will be fine.”
“I tried so hard to have a child for him.”
“I know. It was not meant to be.”
“He hurt me too. But coupling is always painful, isn’t it?”
Gage stroking her, entering her, lifting her, “Not always.”
Adwen’s gaze flew to Brynn’s face. “The Norman does not hurt you when he beds you?”
“You know about the Norman?”
“Richard told me when he returned from Hastings that your duties would not only be healing. I prayed for you.” Her hands opened and closed on the sheet. “And then, when I became ill again, I prayed for myself. I knew only God could save me. Richard wants me dead. He’s always wanted me dead, but I would not admit it. I could not believe anyone could be so cruel. I wanted only to do what I had been taught was my duty. It was not my fault I could not have a child. In spite of what he said, it was not my fault.” Her gaze went to Alice on the cot. “Poor woman, I don’t envy her. A babe is such a wondrous thing, but I would rather die than give birth to his child now.”
“That is not kind. A child is innocent of guilt.”
“I know, but the child would be as beautiful as Richard, and I could not help but remember my foolishness. I remember when I first came to Redfern, I thought I had never seen a more handsome man. He was so full of smiles and graceful ways. He dazzled me.”
“You were only a child.”
“It is more than that. It is a weakness in me that I worship beauty. Even as the years passed, I could not see beyond his comeliness. I didn’t think God would make a creature so beautiful and give him a black heart.” Her lips twisted. “Remember when I told you how lucky I was that I didn’t have a husband like Delmas? How stupid you must have thought me.”
“I never thought you stupid,” she said gently.
“Then you may be even more foolish than I.” Adwen smiled. “But I will not remain stupid. I can learn and my will is not weak. I would have died in that stable if I had not been determined to keep alive. I want to live, Brynn. I want to be well. Will you help me?”
Brynn smiled. “That’s why I came back.”
Adwen’s hand tightened on Brynn’s. “I know it’s not fair of me. You have your own troubles. What of Delmas?”
“Lord Richard has sent Delmas away.”
“Why?”
Brynn looked away. “Lord Gage didn’t want him here.”
“Alice said the Norman was enamored of you. Is it true?”
“No, he is enamored of what lies between my legs.”
“But you said he was gentle with you.”
As gentle as a storm, as tender as a white-hot blaze. Her mind could not resist going back to that afternoon of coupling. “I didn’t say he was gentle.”
“You like it,” Adwen said, her eyes widening in shock. “You like lying with the Norman. I thought he had given you no choice.”
“He did not.”
“But you enjoy him.” Her brow wrinkled with worry. “Is that not wrong? You have a husband. It is a sin.”
“Is it not a sin to have a husband who forces you to marriage? I said no vows.”
“No vows are required from a woman.”
“They are in Gwynthal.”
“Then it must have very strange laws.”
“Just laws.” She patted Adwen’s hand. “Don’t be concerned. I sleep with the Norman because I must. It will not be for long and I’m sure God will forgive my body for betraying me.”
“No one could help but forgive you anything, Brynn. It is you who must forgive me for questioning you. How do I know what is sin and what is not? Everything is changing, isn’t it?”
“Be still. No forgiveness is necessary on either side. Are we not friends? Now go to sleep.”
“Brynn …” Adwen hesitated. “Are all these foreigners so glorious to behold?”
“What?”
“Well, the Norman clearly pleases you and—”
“I did not say he—”
Adwen gestured impatiently. “His appearance does please you.”
Sleek massive shoulders, eyes the blue of the northern sea. “Yes,” she said cautiously.
“And this one.” She gestured to the sleeping Malik. “He is even more beautiful than my husband. Richard told me that the Normans were all hairy brutes with buck teeth who seldom bathed. If the Normans are all so comely, it must be difficult to see beyond the surface to the evil.”
“Malik is not Norman, he is Saracen and he’s not evil. His heart is as good as his face.”
Adwen doubtfully shook her head. “I thought that of Richard. It is too hard to tell what is behind a handsome face.”
“Well, Normans are like Saxons. Some are comely, some are ugly. You need not worry about being overwhelmed.” She stood up and got a blanket from the linen chest. “And you need not worry about anything tonight.”
Adwen’s gaze again went to Alice. “Poor woman,” she whispered. “Life is not fair to women. There should be something we can do.…”
• • •
“Good day.” Gage strode brusquely into Adwen’s chamber. “How are you, Malik?”
“Better all the time.” He indicated Adwen. “May I present Lady Adwen? This is my friend, Lord Gage Dumont.”
“Lord Gage,” Adwen murmured. She studied him for a moment and then smiled and held out her hand. “Thank you for coming to Redfern.”
Gage moved forward, took her hand, and gracefully bowed over it. “If I had known such a beautiful lady was hidden here, I would have urged William to invade England much sooner.”
Brynn stared at him in astonishment. His manners were polished, his smile almost gentle. This was a Gage she had never seen. She caught Malik’s knowing glance and remembered what he had told her.
He is many men—poet, merchant, warrior. You have seen only the warrior.
But it seemed Adwen was permitted to see another side of him. She should feel happy, not annoyed, she told herself. Adwen needed all the gentleness she could garner.
“You are very kind, but I have no beauty.” Adwen raised her hand to the black circles beneath her eyes. “I feel as without color as an unlit candle.”
“Then we must light the candle.” Gage smiled. “Trust in Brynn. She seems to be very good at the task.”
“I do trust her.” Adwen reached out and took Brynn’s hand. “Always.” She looked up at him. “But she often sees what is practical and not what is proper. It is not fitting I occupy a bed with any man.” She gestured to Malik across the bed. “I must be moved from this bed.”
Malik sighed. “I knew it could n
ot last. Do you wish to see me sicken and die of melancholy?”
“I must be moved,” she repeated firmly. She pointed to the cot across the room where Alice had slept the previous night. “Perhaps another cot could be brought in and you could put me there.”
“I assure you that Malik is too ill to behave with anything but the utmost gallantry.” His lips twitching, Gage added, “Though in a few weeks your concern might have foundation.”
Adwen’s jaw squared. “I must be moved.” She imperiously held out her arms. “Please.”
“As you like.” Gage scooped her up, carried her across the room, and set her with great care on the cot.
“No!” Malik protested. “If anyone is to be moved, it should be me. It is her right to stay here. This is her bed, her chamber.”
“I have no rights.” Adwen’s lips curved bitterly. “My lord husband has made that clear. This cot is sheltered from wind and cold and much more comfortable than the one he sent me to in the stable.”
Malik muttered a curse. “I will take the cot. Bring her back and move me, Gage.”
“I will stay where I am,” Adwen said firmly. “It is my choice to move. I have received no great wound. You must occupy the bed.”
Malik said, “And what kind of man would I be to permit such a thing? Gage, you must—”
“I will do nothing.” Gage looked with amusement from one belligerent face to another. “Not until the quarrel is settled between you. I refuse to spend my day transferring bodies about. Lady Adwen is light as a feather, but you’re no mean weight.” He turned to Brynn. “Get your cloak.”
She looked at him in surprise. “Why?”
“We’re going to ride out and see the property. You’re going to show me the glories of Redfern. Did you not hear Lord Richard’s instructions?”
“I don’t obey Lord Richard.”
He met her stare. “Then come because I ask it.”
He was trying to tell her something. She could not tear her eyes away. “And if I refuse?”
“Then I will go alone.”
He was asking, not demanding. The pleasure the knowledge brought was too sweet, and she instinctively shied away from it. “I must stay here and—”
An accident might befall the Norman.
Fear soared through her as she remembered Delmas’s words. “You would be foolish to wander about an enemy countryside by yourself. Take Captain LeFont.”
“I think not. It’s never a good idea to let a defeated enemy believe you fear him.” He started to turn away. “If you refuse to honor me with your company today, I’ll try again tomorrow.”
An arrow launched from hiding. An attack by Richard’s minions as he rode through the forest. He might be dead tomorrow.
“No!” She whirled away and snatched up her cloak. “I’ll go with you. I’ll meet you in the courtyard. I must go fetch Alice from the kitchens to watch Adwen and Malik.”
“It’s not so bad a property as I first thought when I saw that crude dwelling,” Gage said. “At least, the fields appear rich and well tended.” His gaze wandered to the forest to the north. “How is the game?”
“Lord Richard and his vassals seem to find plenty to hunt.” Brynn quickly glanced over her shoulder at the farmer, who had stopped to watch their progress. His regard was curious, not threatening, she realized with relief.
She turned back to see Gage’s eyes narrowed on her face. “It’s you who appear hunted,” he said softly. “Are you expecting someone to follow us?”
She forced a smile. “Why should I?” she said, then changed the subject. “The wild pig that was served in the hall last night was no doubt killed in that forest. Lord Richard often brings down big game.”
“He’s a good hunter, then?”
“Yes. Very good.” She could still feel Gage’s stare but studiously avoided it. “He enjoys the kill.” She again glanced over her shoulder. The farmer had gone back to his harvesting. “Are you ready to go back to the manor?”
“No, I believe we’ll go and see if the hunting in that forest is as plentiful as you claim.”
“No!”
He pounced on her immediate objection. “Why not? You like the woods. What’s different about this one?”
“It’s too far.”
He raised his brows. “A quarter mile away?”
He was not going to give up. She searched wildly for a diversion. “Would you like to see where I grow herbs for my salves?”
“Is it in the forest?”
She nodded. “Just on this edge.” No one knew about her little bower. If she could keep him there until dusk, perhaps he would not venture deeper into the forest. “It’s a very pleasant place.”
Gage motioned her to precede him. “Then by all means let’s go there.”
The small glade was completely enclosed by a thick tangle of shrubbery, and they had to force their way through. As usual, her spirits lifted as the scent of rosemary, thyme, and mint drifted to her. Her place. As close to Gwynthal as she could make it. She glanced eagerly over her shoulder. “This is my garden. Isn’t it beautiful?”
“Beautiful,” he echoed, looking at her. He got down from his horse and lifted her off the mare. “But a little out of the way for a garden. Wouldn’t Lord Richard allow you a patch of land nearer the manor?”
“I didn’t ask. I explained that I could find the proper herbs only in the woods.”
“And no one knows about this place?”
“No.” She added without thinking, “It’s quite safe.”
“Safe?” He turned to look at her.
“I meant that my garden is safe from being trampled by forest creatures,” she said quickly. “They don’t like the prickliness of the holly bushes.”
“I don’t think that’s what you meant,” Gage said. “What do you fear in this forest that you didn’t in the one at Hastings?”
“Nothing. What could I fear?”
His expression hardened. “Tell me.”
She was silent.
“Shall I go deeper into the woods and find out for myself?”
“No!” She would have to tell him. “Lord Richard is not to be trusted. He may try to do you harm.”
“Indeed? How do you know?”
“Delmas told me.” She saw the expected reaction and blurted out, “You see, you take the knowledge that Lord Richard may try to kill you quite calmly, but I make mention of Delmas and you grow angry. It makes no sense.”
“I gather that Delmas didn’t confide Lord Richard’s plans so that you could give me warning?”
She didn’t answer.
“So he was privy to Lord Richard’s plans. I find it strange that he would confide such a plot to a slave. Now, why would he do that?”
She said reluctantly, “Delmas was desperate for help to get me back and told him of the treasure.”
“Ah, your husband was desperate for your return.”
“Because of the treasure. He cares nothing for me.” Her hands clenched into fists at her sides. “Delmas is no worse than Lord Richard. Why accept one and hate the other?”
“It must be a grievous fault in my character.” He turned and walked toward the brook. “Actually, I’m glad your husband is plotting my death. It will make it easier to remove him. Not that it would have been hard before.”
“Lord Richard is the one to blame. Delmas only does his bidding.” His expression didn’t change and she spat out in frustration, “I wish I had not told you. Now you will think only of death and vengeance. I should never have warned you.”
“Why did you warn me?” He took a step closer. “If I had been killed, it would have been one less enemy to plague you.”
She hurriedly glanced away. “Better you than Delmas and Lord Richard.”
“I’m not flattered by the comparison.” He lifted her chin and forced her to stare into his eyes. “Look at me. Am I truly the enemy, Brynn?”
“You keep me from Gwynthal. You call me your slave. How can you be anything else bu
t my enemy?”
“If you were not my slave, would you leave me?”
“Yes.”
“Then you will remain my slave.” He turned away, sat down, and took off his boots. “But if it makes you easier, I am not the trusting fool you think me. I would have to be a madman to believe Richard of Redfern would tamely hand his birthright over to me. I had LeFont take a company of men to search this forest and the surrounding countryside for malcontents yesterday after we arrived. He’s making a similar search today.”
Her eyes widened. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Why? It is what I would have done in any enemy land.” He took off his mail and tunic and lay down on the moss beside the creek. He closed his eyes. “But now that I know you have my interests at heart, I feel no hesitation about letting you guard me.”
No one appeared less in need of protection. Nudity should have made him look vulnerable, but it did not. He was all bronze and ebony, a huge, gleaming cat sunning himself after the hunt … or before the hunt.
“What are you doing?”
He didn’t open his eyes. “I think it clear. I had a disturbed night and feel the need for a nap. Wake me before dusk.”
She stared at him uncertainly. “And what do you wish me to do while you sleep?”
“Do whatever you would do if I weren’t here.” He yawned. “This is your place, not mine.”
Of course it was her place. Why was she so hesitant? She knew the answer. He had only to enter into a place and it became subtly his own. She was not sure she would ever be able to come back here without seeing his big body lying on that mossy bank.
Well, her sleep had also been disturbed, but she was wide awake and there was plenty to do. She had been gone too long. She knelt and began to pluck the weeds from the beds. The scents were heady, the birds singing, the sun warm, and the peace she always felt when she was here began to flow over her.
It was a long time later, when the rays of the sun had grown long over the glade, that she became aware he was watching her.
She glanced over her shoulder and smiled. “It’s almost time to go.”
“Soon.” He stretched lazily before rising to his feet and moving across the glade toward her. “What are you doing?”