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by Linda Bridey
When she reached the altar, Charlie gave her hand to Dean. He squeezed her hand and looked into her gorgeous eyes. Her smile was radiant as they said their vows. When they exchanged their vows, there were tears of joy in her eyes.
Pastor Williams said, “By the powers invested in me by the state of Montana, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”
Dean’s kiss was long and tender and Tessa lost herself in it. Sadie giggled and it made Dean and Tessa break apart. Dean leaned his forehead on Tessa’s and chuckled.
“I guess I forgot that there were other people here,” he whispered.
“Me, too,” Tessa said.
They turned and faced the wedding participants. The minister presented the newlyweds to them and they were congratulated and embraced. They held a celebratory meal in the basement of the chapel. It was a small affair, but jubilant nonetheless. They cut the cake and fed each other a piece amid cheers and laughter.
Lydia and Charlie took Sadie and Jack for a week to give the newlyweds privacy. Dean and Tessa bid them goodbye and drove off in their buggy, which had been decorated with ribbons and flowers.
Dean was quiet on the drive to their ranch.
“What are you thinking about, husband?” Tessa asked. She loved the way that sounded.
Dean smiled at her. “I was just thinking that I’m a lucky man and that I’m looking forward to our life together.”
“As am I,” Tessa said and leaned against Dean.
They turned onto the road leading into the ranch and as the house came into view, Tessa had a true sense of homecoming and saw the ranch in a new light. This was her home now and she was now a married woman. Dean stopped the buggy by the house and helped Tessa down.
“You go on in the house and I’ll get the horse taken care of and feed the stock quickly, ok?” he said.
Tessa nodded. “Yes, of course. I’ll be waiting.” She gave Dean a coy look and then entered the house.
Dean hurried to the barn to get his chores done.
When he entered the kitchen, it was dimly lit by candles and two wine glasses sat on the table, over which a lacy table cloth had been placed. Tessa sat in one of the chairs. She poured them each a glass of wine.
Dean loosened his tie and undid several buttons of his shirt. Tessa swallowed at the sight of his bare throat and the top of his chest. “Come and have a drink.”
Dean pulled another chair over close to her and sat down. Their legs touched and Tessa felt the heat of his thigh against hers. Tessa picked up her glass. “A toast.”
Dean raised his in response.
“To a bright future and a new beginning for us all. May we all share love and laughter and happiness for the rest of our lives,” Tessa said.
“Well said,” Dean agreed.
They touched their glasses together and then set them down. Dean leaned over and cupped the back of her head. He brushed his mouth gently over hers and such desire as he’d never known rushed through him. Tessa’s lips tasted of the wine and added to her own sweetness.
Tessa placed her hands against his chest and leaned closer. She enjoyed the strong flesh under her palms and became bolder. Pushing his suit jacket from his shoulders, Tessa shifted even closer to him. Dean began removing the pins from her hair, letting them fall to the floor. Once the silken tresses were loose from their confinement, Dean buried his hands in her hair.
A soft moan escaped Tessa’s lips and their embrace became even more passionate. Together, they got rid of Dean’s suit jacket completely and Dean trailed kisses along Tessa’s neck to her collarbone. Dean could take no more and rose from the table. Taking her hand, he led her to their bedroom.
Chapter Twelve
The next two days were filled with happiness for Dean and Tessa. Dean still took care of the stock and Tessa kept the house, but they also had many passionate moments together. One night, they lay in a pasture after they’d made love. They watched the stars and lay close against each other.
“Tell me about the winters here again. You told me about them in your letters and it felt as if I were there, it was so descriptive,” Tessa requested.
Dean fought the fear that gripped him. He had no idea what Marcus had told her and he certainly wasn’t good with words like Marcus was. “Well, that was a little while ago, so I’m not sure if I remember exactly.”
Tessa snuggled even closer. “I know. It’s all right. It’s very hard to recreate something like that.”
Dean cleared his throat. “Let’s see. They’re cold, of course.”
“Winters generally are,” Tessa said with a laugh.
“The storms can come on real quick. We usually get at least one blizzard each winter. It can get down below zero sometimes and we have to make sure the cattle don’t freeze. When we see a blizzard is coming, we string a rope between here and the barn so that we don’t get lost going out to feed them. You can’t really see where you’re going because the snow comes down so thick and fast,” Dean told her and mentally cringed.
Tessa was puzzled. Dean was giving her a general description, but nothing like what his letters had described. As a writer and a student of writing, she recognized that the voice was not the same at all. It was as if someone else had written those letters. Maybe it was just because she had put him on the spot. She had an idea.
“Yes, and you said that the clouds become dark gray, like dull metal,” Tessa said.
Dean nodded. “Yep, I did.”
Tessa tensed beside him and raised her head so their eyes could meet. “Your letter said no such thing. You didn’t write those letters, did you?”
Dean knew his goose was cooked. “Look, I’m not good with words, so I had Marcus help me out.”
“Marcus? He wrote them?” Tessa moved away from him as shock took hold of her. “Did he read the letters I wrote back?”
“Yes. He had to so he knew how to answer them,” Dean said. It seemed reasonable to him.
Fury blurred Tessa’s vision for a few moments. “I said many personal things in those letters, Dean. Things I didn’t think anyone else would ever read! How could you do that? How could you lie to me?”
Dean propped himself up on an elbow. “I didn’t lie. Everything in those letters was true.”
Tessa got up and pulled her dress over her head. Anger showed in every movement as she pulled it down and straightened it. “How would you know?” she shouted. “You didn’t write them!” She gathered up her petticoats, turned away, and headed for the house.
Dean hurriedly put his pants on and went after her. He caught her arm and turned her back around. “Everything in them was true. Marcus only wrote what I told him to write. He just said it better than I can,” he said.
“Did you approve them before he sent them?” she asked stiffly.
Dean scowled. “No. I figured he knew what he was doing.”
Tessa looked down at her arm. “Kindly unhand me. I don’t care to be touched by someone I don’t know.”
“What? You can’t be serious. Not after the past few days,” Dean said.
Tessa colored because she knew he was referring to their lovemaking. “Yes, well. That won’t be happening again. That was when I thought I knew the man I married.”
“Tessa, you do know me,” Dean insisted. “And I know you. I read every one of your letters, over and over. And we’ve spent so much time together over the last couple of months. How could we not know each other?”
Tessa ripped her arm out of Dean’s grasp. “I said let me go. I came here based on what was said in those letters. You don’t even know what was in them! I fell halfway in love just from what they contained. I think I married the wrong brother.”
She whirled and entered the kitchen. Tessa marched to their bedroom and packed up her belongings in her suitcases. Dean watched silently as she finished.
“I’m not leaving the house. I’m moving back upstairs. I don’t want to leave the children and I’ll do my wifely duties, all but one,” Tessa
said giving him a meaningful look. “I can’t share a room with a man I don’t know.”
Dean began to get angry. “This is ridiculous. You’re blowing this way out of proportion.”
“Really? Am I?” Tessa’s eyes blazed with pain and anger. “I don’t think so. Now, if you’ll move out of the way, please.”
Dean could see by the stubborn set of her jaw and stiff posture that she wasn’t going to budge. “Fine. Have it your way,” he said and left the house.
Only when she was in her old room upstairs and had deposited her things on the floor did Tessa let the tears come. She shut and locked the door and lay down on her bed. She sobbed quietly into the pillows. Tessa was hurt because Dean had essentially lied to her and he couldn’t see it. He didn’t think it was a big deal, but, to her, it was. Had it not been for what was said in those letters, she would have never left home to come west. She would not be married to a man who had deceived her and thought she didn’t have a right to be hurt.
Suddenly, she wanted her mother just like she had when she was a little girl and had suffered some kind of hurt. She needed her mother’s strength and comfort, but could not have it. Tessa cried herself to sleep as she realized how alone she was and how foolish she had been to come to Montana all alone.
Chapter Thirteen
When Lydia and Charlie brought the kids back a few days later, Lydia could tell that something was going on with the newlyweds. She waited until after Sadie and Jack had a chance to visit with them before asking about it. Charlie had gone out to the barn with Dean and Sadie and Jack had gone upstairs so Lydia took the opportunity to bring it up.
“Is everything all right?” she asked Tessa.
Tessa smiled. “Of course. Things are fine.”
Lydia cocked her head. “I’m your friend, right?”
“Yes.”
“Then tell me what’s wrong,” Lydia said kindly.
Tessa bit her lip, undecided if she should talk to Lydia about it. It was true that they were friends, but she was family to Dean and Tessa wasn’t sure who Lydia would side with.
Lydia wasn’t going to let it go. “Tessa, I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”
Tessa sat down at the table. Her shoulders slumped in dejection. “He lied to me, Lydia. Dean lied to me.”
Lydia’s brows drew together and her brown eyes held puzzlement. “About what?” Dean was one of the most honest people she knew and it was hard to believe that he’d been dishonest with Tessa. However, she also knew that Tessa didn’t lie, so she was ready to hear Tessa out.
“You know that we exchanged quite a few letters,” Tessa began.
“Yes.”
“His letters were wonderful. He told me about Montana and your lives here in great detail and it was splendid. We discussed so many things and I first began having feelings for him based on those letters or I would have never come here,” Tessa said.
Lydia smiled. “I can understand that.”
Tessa sent her a sad smile. “I came to find out a few days ago that he didn’t write them. Marcus did.”
Lydia’s smile faded as Tessa’s words sank in. “He didn’t write them? Marcus wrote them? Why?”
“He says that Marcus writes and speaks much better about things, that he doesn’t describe things the way Marcus does. So he read my letters, told Marcus a basic way how to answer them, and then just left the rest up to Marcus. Marcus read my letters, Lydia. My privacy was invaded. I said things in those letters that were meant for Dean alone. He never even looked at the letters Marcus wrote back to me.”
“That’s how I found out that he didn’t write them. I was asking him questions about what he’d written and his answers didn’t add up. I confess that I tricked him a little. I’m not proud of it, but I had to know the truth,” Tessa finished and took a steadying breath. She didn’t want to have the children come into the kitchen to find her crying.
Lydia was stunned. It was something she never would have expected of Dean. She saw both sides of the issue. She knew Dean had trouble talking about his feelings and that neither he nor Seth had Marcus’ head for reading and writing. Lydia could understand why Dean would get Marcus to write the letters, but he could have handled things differently.
“You think I’m being silly, don’t you?” Tessa asked anxiously. Lydia’s opinion mattered greatly to her.
Lydia laughed. “No, I don’t. It’s understandable why you’re hurt. He should have asked your permission to have Marcus help him. Dean should have explained the situation, but that’s male pride for you, Tessa. I’m sure you’re used to dealing with men who have a lot of education, but, out here, it’s different. As you know, we don’t have a school near here, so it was a good thing the boys’ father was fairly well educated. My mother was a teacher, so I was lucky, too. Marcus was a natural born student, much the same as Sadie, but Seth and Dean were not and had to work at it.”
“I see,” Tessa said. “I sometimes forget that it’s not as settled here and that schooling is scarce. I can understand, but it’s the principle behind it. He doesn’t understand why I’m so upset about it. I feel as if I was brought here under false pretenses. I wanted to connect with Dean and no one else and I feel as if that didn’t happen. I moved back upstairs. I can’t sleep in the same room with him.”
Lydia put a hand over her mouth. “Oh, my. I would ask that you don’t do anything rash, Tessa. It might take some time, but do you think that there’s a chance of forgiveness?”
“I don’t know. That might be up to him, Lydia. I’m just so hurt right now,” Tessa said.
Sadie came into the room then and the subject was dropped.
*****
Evening had come and Dean sat on the small porch of Seth’s bunkhouse, explaining the situation with Tessa to his brother. He valued Seth’s opinion and needed a sounding board.
Seth let out a low whistle. “Boy, you really stepped in it, Dean.”
Dean’s face took on a stubborn scowl. “I told her why I did it and it didn’t seem to matter to her. I wasn’t trying to lie. I just didn’t want her to think I was stupid.”
“Hmm. Seems like that’s what happened anyway,” Seth said with a smile.
“This isn’t funny, Seth. She moved back upstairs.”
Seth said, “Well, I can’t blame her in a way.”
“Why?”
Seth shifted in the rocking chair on the small porch of his bunkhouse to look at his brother. “Dean, the only woman you’ve ever been romantically involved with before was Sarah. You two knew each other as youngsters and fell in love early. She was a sweet woman and I loved her very much,” he said. “But take it from someone who’s been, uh, involved with a lot more women. There are things that matter most to women and honesty is number one. Even if they don’t like what you’re saying, if you’re honest, they respect you. You weren’t completely honest with her and she thinks that everything was a lie. She’s not going to want to share a bed with someone she thinks she doesn’t know.”
Dean sighed. “There were no lies in those letters. Everything Marcus put in those letters was what I told him to write. He just says it better, that’s all. I didn’t know this was going to be such a big deal.”
“Yeah, you’re right about Marcus being smart like that. He’s like Pa. Ma was a smart woman, too, don’t forget. Just in a different way,” Seth said. “As far as lying goes, I’m not sayin’ you meant to trick her or anything, but you should have let her know that someone was helpin’ you. I didn’t know Marcus was or I would have mentioned that part to you.”
“I know. Tessa comes from a whole other world, Seth. She has an education and I figured that she wouldn’t keep writing to someone who sounded like I would have. How was I gonna compete with those letters?” Dean said.
“Yep, I get that, too.”
Dean shot Seth an exasperated look. “You get it, but I’m still wrong somehow. That’s what you’re sayin’. She wouldn’t even listen to me or try to understand.”
Dean said nothing more. He may not be a man of many words, but he was a man of action. He was danged if he was going to let this go on. Dean wasn’t going to let the woman go on thinking the worst of him.
*****
Marcus sat out on his porch that same evening, whittling like usual. Roscoe sat beside him. The dog’s ears perked up and he barked. Marcus looked up and was surprised to see Tessa riding Zip up to his porch.
“Hey, there, Tessa. Did you come for your whittling lesson?” he asked with a smile.
As Tessa came up on the porch and sat in one of the chairs close to him, Marcus could see that something was troubling his sister-in-law.
She looked him in the eyes and said, “Marcus, it has come to my understanding that you were the one who wrote back and forth with me.”
“Yeah. Well, sort of. Dean responded to what you wrote, but I just made it a little more polished,” Marcus said.
Tessa’s eyes became stormy with anger. “You had no right to read the things I wrote. They were meant for Dean and no one else, Marcus. You invaded my privacy and now I feel as if I do not really know my husband. Do you understand that?”
Marcus put down his whittling and faced her. “I’m sorry, Tessa. I didn’t think of it like that. I was just trying to help him out, that’s all. He’s pretty reticent about his feelings, especially after Sarah and the baby.”
“I would have appreciated knowing that he had help with writing them, but I will be honest with you. If I had known that someone else was reading my letters, the correspondence would have stopped and I would not be here,” she said.
Marcus’ eyebrows rose. “Really? You feel that strongly about it?”
“Yes! Imagine if you were writing to someone, telling them very personal things, only to find out that they were reading them to other people,” Tessa said.
“Tessa, no one ever saw those letters but Dean and I,” Marcus said. “I promise you that. Is that what you and Dean are fighting about?”