by Bella Andre
“Good night,” she said, fluttering her fingers at him. The fingers he’d held in his. He couldn’t take his eyes off her mouth, the lips he’d kissed.
What the hell would Susan think if she knew he was lusting after his sister-in-law when he’d split from Whitney only a month ago?
He turned, thinking it would be easier to leave if he couldn’t see her anymore.
But nothing was easy about leaving her behind.
“Paige.”
He reached for her, dragging her into his arms. Her lips opened under his, and he sank into her.
She was spicy and hot. Sexy and warm.
Perfect.
Their tongues met, toyed. He lost himself in her taste, her scent, the sensual feel of her in his arms. The kiss consumed him until he was completely lost in sensation. She’d been cold before, but now her hands were hot on him, sliding along the collar of his jacket, into his hair, holding his face close so that the kiss went deeper still.
There was no doubt. He wanted Paige.
Now.
Craziness didn’t matter.
Right and wrong flew off into the night.
There was just her mouth beneath his, her body pressed so tightly against him that they were almost one.
“Come inside,” she whispered when she backed off to drag in air.
There was nothing he wanted more. Go inside. Strip off her clothes. And love her until neither of them could remember why they shouldn’t be naked and tangled together.
But her question, the sudden loss of contact, brought him back to who they were. To the night. To reality.
If he went inside with her, he would have her, probably right there on the floor of her living room.
And there would be no going back for either of them.
He couldn’t do that to her. Couldn’t take her without giving her anything but his body. It would destroy them.
Because whatever she wanted from him, he simply didn’t have it in him to give. He was coming down off a bad marriage. And Whitney—her sister would punish Paige mercilessly.
Yet it still killed him to say, “I shouldn’t.” But Lord, how he wanted to.
“Why? You keep saying it’s wrong, but it’s not. We need to talk about this, Evan. What happened in the library. And the way you kissed me just now.”
She’d promised him that discussion when they spoke earlier. He thought he’d avoided it with all the talk about Greg and Theresa and his feelings, which was bad enough. He should have known that wouldn’t satisfy Paige. And he owed her more. He recognized that. An explanation. A reason. All the damn good reasons he’d been telling himself since he’d first kissed her.
He wanted to repay her for all her goodness, her kindness, all she’d done for him time and again. Staying away from her would be the best way to do that, wouldn’t it? It could be the only way to protect her. From him. And from Whitney’s wrath.
“I’m married to your sister,” It was the easiest answer.
“And you’re getting divorced because she treated you horribly,” she reminded him. Just as he’d known she would, because Paige always saw right through the easy answers. Straight to the honest ones. “Tell me the real reason why.”
So many reasons. Too many. Because he didn’t deserve to be with her now after he’d been so stupid as to let Whitney turn his head nine years ago. Because risking his heart again seemed impossible when it was so badly bruised and battered. Because Paige deserved more than a man with such a complicated past and present.
And Paige would shoot down every one of them, because she didn’t understand how irreversibly damaged he was.
All he could get out was, “It’s just not possible.”
She gazed at him for a long moment, her eyes tracking his face. Her lips were still wet and lush from his kiss. Slowly, she stepped back, leaving him feeling frozen all the way to his heart.
“Anything’s possible, Evan. You just have to be willing.”
Then she walked inside and shut the door behind her.
* * *
Paige sagged against the closed door, dropping her head into her hands.
She’d practically begged him to come in, to make love to her.
But he couldn’t see past the other women in his life. Or the darkness that still haunted him.
Her phone rang, and when she dug it out of her purse, she saw that it was Whitney again.
It was just like her sister to choose the absolute perfect—or worst—moment to call. Frustrated, and angry, Paige swiped the call away. She would not let Whitney destroy the beautiful, hot memory of being in Evan’s arms. It didn’t matter that his almost ex-wife was her sister. Sure, it might be slightly awkward when they explained things to people. But it didn’t matter, damn it! Whitney had given up her rights to him when she’d demolished him.
Paige put her hands to her cheeks. They were burning, and her lips were still tingling from his kiss.
Evan wanted her. She had no more doubts about that. If the door had been unlocked and she’d pulled him inside, they would have made love.
Only, instead of doing that, she’d stopped. Asked. Let him overthink and beat himself up for all the “wrong” things he thought he was doing. She’d let him walk away.
If he could, he’d stay away. Because that would be easier. Safer.
He’d lock himself away from all of them—not just her, but also his long-lost family—just as he’d tried to lock himself away from the foster family who took him in.
But Susan and Bob had fought for him, through difficult teenage years when he’d tried to stay inside his battered shell.
The Mavericks had fought for him, through thick and thin, profits and losses, personal hells and triumphs.
They’d all fought hard enough for him that he’d eventually had to accept their love as real. As strong. As lasting.
Now Paige would fight for him too. Because she’d loved Evan too long and loved him too deeply to walk away without a fight.
Chapter Nineteen
In his office the following day, with a rare thirty-minute break between meetings, Evan decided it was long past time to call Susan.
But even as he reached for his phone, he had a moment’s trouble focusing. Yet again, Paige had consumed his thoughts last night, keeping him awake long past midnight. Not only the kiss they’d shared on her front step, but also how much he’d enjoyed their dinner, their walk together. When he’d finally slept, his dreams had been hot and wild—and full of joy.
Anything is possible, Evan. You just have to be willing.
Paige’s voice had woven its way into his dreams. Had he been crazy for not carrying her inside and making love to her? For not discovering if waking up with her in his arms just might be the best thing he’d ever known?
Calling Susan when his insides felt this twisted was either a great idea, because she had a knack for finding the perfect words to say, or a terrible one, because she always saw right through to the heart of things. Even when Evan couldn’t see them himself.
“Hey, lovely lady,” he said when she answered.
“Evan.” Her smile bubbled through in her voice. “I’ve missed your calls so much.”
Guilt dealt him an uppercut, though Susan wouldn’t have meant for that to happen. “And I’ve missed hearing your voice.”
“How does it feel being back home?” He heard the two words she’d left out: without Whitney.
“It’s good.” Even if the house was way too big for just him. “But something huge happened on New Year’s Day.” There was no easy approach except saying it right out. “My mother came by to see me. To top it off, she has two adult children. My real brother and sister. Not half. Not step.”
There was complete silence for two beats, then Susan’s voice rushed out, “Oh Evan. Oh my God. I have to sit down.” He heard the scrape of a chair. “You tell me. Everything.”
He did, from start to finish. Except the part about kissing Paige. Or how exponentially his feelings had grown
for her in the past week.
When he was finished, she said, “I’m just so glad Paige has been there for you. Just like she’s always been.”
Yes, without question, Paige had always been there when he needed her. He owed her so much. Flowers and an expensive dinner weren’t enough. He just couldn’t wrap his mind around anything that would actually show Paige how grateful he was. “I can tell,” Susan continued, “how pleased you are to have met your brother and sister. But what about seeing your mom again?”
He stared out at San Francisco Bay, deciding he’d answer with the facts. “She obviously did a good job raising them. They got scholarships for college. Kelsey is a CPA. Tony is getting a master’s degree.”
“You’re thinking that she did a lot better for them than she did for you.” Though Susan spoke softly, she didn’t hold anything back. She’d tried to teach all of the Mavericks to express what they felt, what they believed. Some of them had learned it better than others.
“It’s not polite to read people’s minds,” he teased, in lieu of facing her statement head on.
She laughed before turning serious again. “Maybe she was trying to make up for what she did in the only way she could. What she was never able to do for you, she tried to do double for them.”
He hadn’t thought of it that way. But even though Susan made sense, it didn’t lessen the ache inside him. “She did one thing right,” he finally said. “She let me stay with you and Bob.”
“I love you too, honey.” Then she added the kicker. “I’m sure she’s hoping she can rebuild her relationship with you. Any mother would want that.”
Susan and Bob had taught him to always be honest. Even when it was difficult. And damn, it was hard to admit to her, “I don’t know if I can do that.”
“Evan, honey, have you ever thought that reconciling with your mother might be less about what she needs and more about what you need?”
“I don’t need it.” He had Susan. He had Bob and the Mavericks. Theresa had been gone so long that he couldn’t even relate to her as a mother.
“When you didn’t know where she was, you didn’t have to think about it. But now she’s brought back all the shadows. You can’t have those shadows hanging over you if you’re ever going to move on. Especially after what Whitney did.”
He’d come home from Europe intending to move on, promising himself that he wouldn’t let Whitney steal another moment of his life. But one of the reasons he hadn’t gone into Paige’s apartment last night was Whitney. If she’d ever found out, there would have been hell to pay. Which meant he was still giving his ex all the power she had never deserved.
“Just think about what I’m saying, okay?”
He smiled despite his dark mood. “I always think about everything you say.”
“Sure you do,” she teased. But then she gave an excited little yelp. “I just had the most marvelous idea. Why don’t you fly the twins and your mom out here? Just for the weekend. So that Bob and I can get to know them too.”
He pulled the phone away from his ear to stare at it. “This is a joke, right?”
“I’m totally serious. I’d love to meet your brother and sister. And our house is a nice, safe environment for everyone to get to know each other better. Plus, that would keep your mom away from the ex-boyfriend in Modesto for a couple of days. I’m sure this first weekend will be the worst for her, when she’s alone in an empty house.”
“This is crazy.” Yet he felt an odd kick inside at the thought of a weekend to get to know his brother and sister better, especially with Susan and Bob there to keep Theresa busy.
“What do you think?” she pressed.
“If we did it,” he said slowly, “there’s not enough room for all of us at the house, so I’d book a hotel for myself.”
“Of course there’s room for everyone, but I get it. You want to make sure you have somewhere to go, if you need it.” She barely paused before saying, “So, you’ll ask them to come this weekend?”
He knew firsthand just how good Susan’s intentions always were. But while Tony and Kelsey were great, Evan was wary about getting too close too fast, before he knew more about them. After all, that had been his problem with Whitney—he’d seen only what he’d wanted to see and had stupidly let her in. And of course, he wasn’t interested in going out of his way to reconnect with Theresa.
Knowing him well enough to guess that his silence was a mask for his reluctance, Susan said, “What if Paige could come too?”
His heart stopped. Paige? God help him. He wanted a weekend with her so badly, he felt lightheaded. Wanted more time with her—talking, laughing, kissing—any way he could get it.
Hadn’t he been thinking he needed to stay away from her for her own good? Yeah, right, like that was going to happen. Not when his heart jumped at the first opportunity to see her again.
“She’s so good at smoothing over rough patches,” Susan continued. “And I know how much you enjoy her company.”
His heartbeat kicked up. Does Susan know? Could she read his feelings about Paige as easily as she could read everything else about him?
“She’s been a good sister-in-law.” He used the phrase deliberately, reminding Susan—and himself—exactly who Paige was. Whitney’s off-limits sister.
“She’s been a good friend,” Susan corrected. “Through thick and thin, Paige has always been there for you.” Now his foster mother was the one carefully reminding him that Paige, rather than his wife, was the one who had stuck by him in good times and bad. “She had such fun in the snow at the wedding, I’m sure she’d love to come back to a white winter for another couple of days.”
If it was just a white winter that would make Paige happy, Evan could book her a weekend at a fancy spa resort in Lake Tahoe. But what Paige loved most of all—more than massages or fancy restaurants or impressive five-star resorts—was family. Paige would choose a weekend in Chicago with everyone over anything else he could offer. This trip was something he could give her, a small repayment for all she’d done.
Yeah, great rationalization.
Because the truth he didn’t want to admit to anyone—especially himself—was that he wanted an entire weekend with Paige. Even if he couldn’t kiss her, couldn’t touch her when they were with his family, at least they would be together.
* * *
He called Kelsey, Tony, and Theresa first. Funny that calling Theresa felt easier than calling Paige. Probably because he knew where he and Theresa stood. Whereas with Paige…
Silently cursing his powerful desire for the one woman he could never have, Evan told his assistant to push back his next meeting, then dialed Theresa’s number for the second time in as many days.
She answered on the first ring, her voice tentative as she said, “Evan?”
“There are a couple of things I wanted to check in with you about. First, I talked to Greg, and he won’t be bothering you anymore.”
“You talked to Greg?” She was clearly shocked, her voice suddenly higher than normal.
“He apologized for hurting you.” He wouldn’t tell her that Greg had asked for money. “But he was also on his third beer in the middle of the day.”
“He has a problem with alcohol,” she agreed softly.
Evan wanted to ask her how she could possibly pick yet another guy with a drinking problem after running away from her abusive, alcoholic husband. How could she be so blind? How could she make such bad decisions time and time again?
But he’d been blind with Whitney, hadn’t he? Marrying her had been the worst decision he’d ever made. Though staying with her so long might have been even worse.
So he understood a thing or two about bad decisions. And turning his back on a woman in distress wasn’t a consideration. He’d hold out his hand even to his worst enemy if he or she was drowning. Hell, he’d probably have given his hand to his father if he’d asked for help, even after everything. But his father had never asked.
“Greg’s not your prob
lem anymore. If he shows up, call me. A friend knows a guy in the Modesto Police Department who’ll drive by your house occasionally.
“Thank you, Evan. You’re too good to me.”
Her words—and how hard they hit him—nearly had him hanging up before he got to the other reason he’d called. But he wouldn’t disappoint Susan. Not when his foster mother had given so much of herself to him—even when he’d been a temperamental, hormonal teenager with a huge chip on his shoulder.
“Susan wants to meet you and the twins.”
“Susan Spencer?” This time, her voice was darn near a squeal of shock. “The woman who took you in after…”
His chest, his gut, everything in him, tightened up as he said, “Yes, she’d like to meet you this weekend. We’d fly out on my plane Saturday morning to Chicago, if that works for you.”
“Of course it does,” she said, “but are you sure about this trip?”
He wasn’t sure about anything right now.
“I’ll check with Kelsey and Tony now, then confirm the travel details.”
“I know they’ll be thrilled to spend more time with their brother.”
Brother. It was amazing how much that word meant to him. Even coming from her.
After they hung up, he called Tony.
“I knew we did the right thing coming to you,” Tony said after Evan gave him the update on Theresa’s ex-boyfriend. “Thanks a million.” Then he laughed and changed it to, “Actually, thanks a billion.”
Evan couldn’t hold back a smile. Tony had charm to spare, even in the worst situations. “I just talked to your mom about a last-minute trip to Chicago.” He explained about Susan—who she was and that she wanted to meet the three of them.
“Chicago sounds great,” Tony said. And then, “She’s your mom too.”
“She is. But there’s too much history to get into it all.”
“Okay.” Tony obviously knew when to let something drop, at least for the time being. “Thanks again. Looking forward to hanging with you in Chicago, bro.”
Evan’s phone rang less than thirty seconds after they hung up.