by Bella Andre
Page 10
Author: Bella Andre
“Forever. ”
As if her words of love had broken the dam that held him immobile, Jake moved back into action, pushing into her so fiercely that the top of her head hit the cushioned headboard behind her as he exploded inside of her at the exact moment her name left his lips.
* * *
Of all the things Jake would never forgive himself for, taking Sophie in such a savage way would never be topped. And yet, even as his self-hatred grew inside of him like a festering virus, she was so soft, so sweet in his arms as she slept that he couldn’t stop himself from breathing in her scent, from soaking up her warmth.
Jake was no stranger to hot sex. He’d been enjoying women of all shapes and sizes since he was a teenager. But sex with Sophie had been so much bigger than anything he’d ever experienced, so much more than just sex.
He’d loved her nearly all his life. Loved her so much, in fact, that he tightened his hold on her even as he faced what had to happen next. He never should have let the sight of her beautiful naked body send him all the way over the edge the way it had. But when she’d unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor, when he’d finally been given everything he’d wanted for so many years, he’d been unable to fight the beast inside of him that wanted Sophie.
Needed Sophie.
Craved Sophie.
The moonlight streaming in through the windows was bright enough for him to see her face as she shifted with him, her soft mouth curving up into a satisfied, contented smile even in her sleep.
What would he give to be worthy of a woman like her?
Jake carefully moved his arms from around her and slipped from the bed. She made a sound of protest, a small frown appearing between her eyebrows, and he thought for a moment she might wake up and catch him sneaking out.
Open your eyes, princess, he silently urged her.
If she called him back to bed, he wouldn’t hesitate to go back to her, to take her again, to repeat what he couldn’t deny were the best moments of his life. Not just watching her come more beautifully than any other woman on earth, but the rare moments of peace he’d felt when he was holding her in his arms.
Instead, she settled deeper into the pillows, wrapping her arms around one and pulling it close. His chest was so tight he could barely breathe as he quietly pulled on his clothes and packed his bag.
It was time to leave. He’d be back in the city in ninety minutes. Less, probably, because he’d likely be the only car on the road at three in the morning.
But all Jake could do was stand in the middle of the bedroom and stare at Sophie. He knew how soft her skin was now, knew exactly what her curves felt like in his hands, could still hear the sweet little gasps and moans she made as she came for him.
Just as he hadn’t been able to stop himself from jumping her when she was naked and offering herself to him in the living room, he couldn’t stop himself now from moving to the edge of the bed and kneeling down. With infinite gentleness, he ran his hand over her hair, then down to her face. She nuzzled her cheek into his palm even as she slept and he had to close his eyes on a sharp pang in the center of his chest.
One day she’d have a husband and kids. She’d belong to someone else, to someone who would love her and take care of her the way she deserved.
But for a few stolen hours, she’d been his.
* * *
Sophie woke up alone in the big bed at first light, still able to feel the imprint of Jake’s hands, his mouth, on her skin. She listened for the sound of the shower running, but the rental house was suspiciously quiet. Maybe, she tried to tell herself as she sat up, he’d gone out for donuts. Because he couldn’t have just left like that, could he? Last night had meant something, she was sure of it. Otherwise she never would have declared her love for—
Her thoughts stuttered, then stopped entirely, when she realized his clothes, his shoes, his bag were all gone.
He’d left her.
Sophie pushed the sheets back and stepped, naked, onto the hardwood floor. The splendor of Napa Valley rolled before her as she stared out the large bedroom window, but she didn’t see the beauty.
All she saw in the glass was a woman who should have known better than to love the one man who wasn’t capable of loving her back.
He’d tried to push her away, tried to convince her to go, but she’d been so sure there was something more beneath his kiss. Something bigger than just desire, a deeper emotional connection than she’d ever had with another man. The kind of love that existed between Chase and Chloe. Marcus and Nicola. Gabe and Megan.
She’d been wrong.
Chapter Nine
Two and a half months later. . .
“Gabe and I are engaged!”
The women in Lori’s living room exclaimed in surprise as they jumped up to hug Megan. Sophie smiled and gushed along with everyone else as her friend gleefully showed the group of women her new diamond engagement ring from Gabe. But even through all the laughter, the joy, Sophie remained numb. Cold all over as the conversation went on around her in a buzz.
Of course she was happy for her good friend and her brother. Sophie was absolutely thrilled that they were about to embark on a new life together as a family, along with Megan’s seven-year-old daughter, Summer.
But right now Sophie wasn’t able to feel much of anything at all.
Lori jumped up off the couch in her living room and came back from the kitchen with a bottle of champagne. “Time to celebrate!” She held a smaller bottle of sparkling apple juice in her other hand for Chloe, who was looking more gorgeous than ever with her baby bump.
Lori filled a glass for everyone as they all sat down. The five of them—Lori, Megan, Nicola, Chloe and Sophie—had begun to have these girls’ nights a few weeks before Chloe’s wedding. Sophie loved spending time with a group of women this amazing. On paper, they didn’t necessarily make the most sense: a choreographer, a CPA, a pop star, a quilter, and a librarian. And yet, they were totally in tune with one another.
“To Megan and Gabe!”
Sophie reached for her glass and was just raising it to her lips when she stopped and quickly put it down. The sweet, bubbly liquid splashed out against the rim and onto the coffee table.
“When did he ask you?” Nicola asked. “We need all the deets, right, girls?”
Megan blushed. “Actually, he asked me at Chloe’s wedding. ”
Everyone blinked with surprise. “But that was, let’s see, how long ago was it?” Lori paused to calculate.
“Two and a half months,” Sophie said, the number burned like a hole into her brain.
“That long?” Lori turned on Megan. “Why didn’t you tell us that night?”
“We didn’t plan on keeping it a secret for so long, I swear. ” Megan looked at Chloe. “Gabe took me out into the vines and dropped to one knee. He told me he’d been carrying the ring around for weeks, that he wanted everything to be perfect when he asked me. ” Megan couldn’t contain her glow. “He had already asked Summer if he could be my husband. And her daddy. ” She sniffled and giggled at the same time. “The two of them are already keeping secrets from me. I’m in such big trouble from here on out,” she said, but it was clear to all of them how happy Megan was, not only to have finally found the love of her life, but also to have a true partner and father to help raise her daughter.
“That is ridiculously romantic,” Lori said, “but you still should have told us. Right, Soph?”
Sophie nodded, hoping her smile looked natural. “Right. ”
“It was your day,” Megan said to Chloe. “And then I guess we were enjoying keeping it to ourselves for a little while. ”
“No problem,” Chloe said, “just as long as you tell us the second you get pregnant. ”
Sophie choked on the breath she’d been taking. Her eyes immediately started watering as she fought to breathe normally.
Ten weeks, two days, and fifteen hours; that’s how long it had been since those hours in Jake’s arms when he’d given her more pleasure than she’d ever dreamed was possible. . . then disappeared in the middle of the night.
It also happened to be exactly enough time to figure out that her period wasn’t missing because it had always come at random intervals or because she was stressed out over work.
No, there was a much more scientific—and shocking—reason why she was so late.
She was pregnant.
Standing in front of the oval mirror over the sink, Sophie stared at herself and tried to see if she looked different yet. But the hollows beneath her eyes, the increased prominence of her cheekbones—neither of those things had anything to do with the baby growing inside her.
No, those were the result of nothing more complicated than self-pity.
How, she’d asked herself a thousand times in the eight hours that had passed since she’d taken a half-dozen pregnancy tests—one from every manufacturer on the market—had it happened?
She already knew the answer to that, of course. Jake had used a condom, she remembered that clearly. But evidently there was a reason for those disclaimers on condom packages.
Despite the shock of seeing that blue line over and over and the word PREGNANT on that one test that clearly believed a word rather than a double blue line was a better way of presenting the life-changing news, it wasn’t lost on Sophie just how ironic it all was.
She was Nice!
The only time she’d ever let herself do something crazy, the only time she’d ever thrown caution to the winds to take what she so desperately wanted, she ended up totally paying for it.
How many lies had she told herself, all because she’d wanted that night with him so badly? The list was ridiculously long, but yet again she made herself go through each bullet point, knowing it was the perfect way to remind herself of the truth.
Lie: If she loved Jake enough, he’d eventually love her back.
Truth: She could spend every second of the rest of her life showering him with love, and he’d never love her. Oh, he’d like her, all right, just as he liked the rest of the Sullivans. But love wasn’t something Jake McCann was ever going to sign up for. He’d even told her that straight to her face.
Lie: The only reason he felt funny about falling for her was because he was such close friends with her brothers.
Truth: Could she have been any more delusional? He hadn’t fallen for her. He’d simply taken what any guy would have taken after she threw it at him: her naked, willing body.
Lie: He didn’t think he was good enough for her, but once she convinced him that he was, they’d have their happy-ever-after.
Truth: Jake was one of the most confident men she’d ever met. If anything was ridiculous, it was that she’d thought he could ever be happy with a boring, nice librarian. It wasn’t that he didn’t think he was good enough for her. He just didn’t want her. Period.
Lie: Their mind-blowing kisses, the shockingly great sex, had to mean he loved her, too.
Truth: Sex wasn’t magic. Orgasms didn’t connect to emotions. And she was a pathetic fool for ever thinking anything else.
Lie: She could have one incredible night in Jake’s arms and then go back to her normal life without anything else changing outside of those wickedly perfect hours.
Truth: Everything had changed.
And still, despite the undeniable list of truths she’d just laid out for herself, Sophie couldn’t stop remembering the way he’d looked at her that night. Had she imagined the fierce possession? The emotion he hadn’t been able to hide? She’d thought he was touching more than just her body. She’d thought he was reaching all the way into her soul.
Stop it, Sophie!
She needed to accept the truth that Jake McCann probably looked at every woman he’d ever slept with like that, and that their hours together had nothing whatsoever to do with touching souls. Just body parts.