Page 20

Highland Heather Page 20

by Ruth Ryan Langan

take in long, shuddering breaths to fill her lungs.

With a knowing smile he brought his hands around her, moving them

slowly along her sides until his thumbs encountered the soft swell of

her breasts. Instantly her nipples hardened and his excitement grew.

"Damned to want what I should never have."

He felt her trembling response and thrilled to it.

"Has any Scotsman ever touched you like this?"

"Stop. You must stop."

"Aye. I'll stop." He bent his lips to hers. This time she did not

pull away or try to avoid his touch.

"When you tell me you hate the sight of me, the touch of me." He

muttered the words against her lips and took the kiss deeper.

Without realizing it, her hands fell limply at her sides. Her tongue

met his, hesitantly at first, then bolder, until she opened her mouth

to him and kissed him as he was kissing her.

Her hands rose to his arms, gripping him for support.

Morgan had intended to prove to her that she would respond to him, no

matter how angry. Instead, he had just foolishly fallen under her

spell. The very things he had so proudly managed to avoid for all

these years had just ensnared him. The touch of her, the taste of her,

were his undoing. He wanted her. God in heaven. He wanted her.

"Tell me, Brenna. Has any Scotsman ever made your blood run hot?" He

kissed her until she was gasping for breath, and still he could not

tear his mouth from hers. Against her lips he muttered, "Has any

Scotsman ever made your heart thunder like this?" His hand covered her

breast and he felt the wild pounding of her heartbeat. Its rhythm

matched his own.

He plunged his tongue into her ear again and again, then once more

covered her mouth with his. With one arm firmly around her, he lifted

his other hand to the dark tangles of her hair and drew her head

back.

Before she could catch her breath he ran openmouthed kisses along the

column of her throat, then lower, to the swell of her breast. Through

her gown he felt her nipple harden at his touch. His excitement grew

as he felt her trembling response.

She brought her arms around his neck and clung to him, hating him for

being so worldly and knowing just how to make her burn with desire.

She hated herself for giving in to this need that pulsed through her,

robbing her of her will. And she hated this weakness that had taken

over her control.

They dropped to their knees on the floor, entangled in each other's

arms.

"Tell me you do not want this," he taunted, "and I will walk away."

He knew it was a lie. At this moment he could not turn away from her

even if she pleaded with him. The need for this damnable little woman

was stronger than anything he'd ever known.

Brenna lifted her tear-filled eyes to him. The feelings that churned

inside her were so new, so frightening, they filled her with terror.

She wanted this man. More than anything in the world. Never before

had she felt so wild and free. But she feared the feelings that

rippled through her, driving her to such wanton behavior.

"Tell me," he, commanded.

"I..." Her throat was so dry she could not speak. She swallowed and

tried again. But no words would come out. Instead she merely clung to

him and offered him her lips.

The thought of her surrender added to his arousal. Desire clawed at

him, stripping him of his pride. He would beg, he would crawl, to have

her. The need for her drove him to be ruthless.

"You may deny all you want, my lady. But your body tells me the

truth."

Her breath shuddered from between parted lips. His own breathing was

ragged and painful.

Her tears spilled over, running in little rivers down her cheeks. Her

words tumbled out, frightened, breathless, causing his heart to stop.

"I am so afraid. I have never been with a man before."

A virgin. God in heaven. Hadn't he always known? She was as sweet,

as untouched, as a rosebud that had not yet come to flower.

Morgan felt a wave of disgust at what he had almost done. He had

driven her mad with his own lust. He had nearly taken her here, on the

cold, hard floor. Like some tavern slut.

He dropped his hands to his sides.

Brenna felt a sudden chill and wished that he would hold her. But when

she looked up she saw that his eyes no longer smoldered. The hint of a

smile was wiped from his lips.

In his arms she had come alive for the first time in her life. Though

the feelings he aroused in her were terrifying, they were also

exciting. And now that he no longer held her, she felt cold and

lifeless. Why had no other man ever aroused these emotions? Had they

always been there, waiting for this man? For a few minutes it had no

longer mattered that he was English and she was Scots. They were a man

and a woman who had come together in naked hunger. Without Morgan

Grey, she sensed, she would never again be lifted to such heights.

He misunderstood her silence.

"Forgive me, Brenna." He lifted a hand to her cheek and wiped away her

tears.

"With you I am like a man possessed.

I have never before tried to force my way with a woman. I had no

right. "

Though she yearned to tell him that she shared his needs, she could not

find the words. These feelings were still too new, her emotions still

too raw.

With great effort he stood and helped her to her feet.

"The goblet."

For the first time she noticed the shattered glass that littered the

hearth.

"Leave it. A servant will clean it on the morrow."

But who would pick up the pieces of her shattered heart?

She chanced another glance at him. His hands were clenched at his

sides. His face was grim.

"Good night, my lady. You will sleep in my chambers. I will remain

here in the sitting chamber."

"Good night." She walked to his sleeping chamber. When she closed the

door, he was still standing where she had left him. Staring morosely

into the flickering flames of the fire.

Chapter Seventeen

1 he only light that burned in Morgan's sleeping chamber was the light

from the fireplace and from a single candle set in an ornate silver

candlestick on a small table. Beside it were a basin and pitcher of

water perfumed with rose petals.

The bed hangings had been let down to assure privacy. The coverlets

had been turned down for the night. More rose petals had been

scattered among the bed linens. Across the foot of the bed an elegant

gossamer and lace night shift had been carefully laid out.

What was all this? Brenna frowned. So. The servants had already

heard.

That was why her room had been emptied of all her things, and why

Morgan's room had been so thoughtfully prepared for lovers.

Lovers. She felt the sting of tears and quickly wiped them away. She

would not cry over Morgan Grey. He was not worthy of her tears. He

did not love her. He had admitted as much. In fact
, she thought,

struggling with the buttons of her gown, he was probably incapable of

loving anyone except himself. He'd been steeped in hatred and

bitterness for so long, there was most likely no room left in his heart

for love.

Where was Rosamunde? she thought, feeling her temper grow. Had the

servants conspired to leave her alone with only Morgan Grey to assist

her in undressing? She felt a flush touch her cheeks. Aye. That was

exactly what they'd had in mind. They had all retired to their beds

early, convinced that the two lovers would prefer to be alone.

Alone. She felt more alone now than she ever had. Her heart tripped

over itself each time she was near Morgan. But he was a man who was

only capable of hatred and bitterness. She paused. What must it be

like to be wed to one who loves another? What pain he must have

suffered at the hand of such a callous woman. Quickly she berated

herself. Had not her sisters always told her she was too

tenderhearted? Soon she would find herself pitying Morgan instead of

resenting him.

She undressed quickly and slipped on the night shift. She padded

across the room and hung her gown on a peg, then crossed to the bed and

snuffed out the candle. Climbing beneath the warm covers, she stared

at the flickering flames and was reminded once again of the heat that

had flared between her and Morgan. How had she allowed that Englishman

to arouse her in such wanton fashion? She had always believed herself

strong enough to resist anything. But this man needed only to touch

her and some sort of weakness pervaded not only her body but her soul,

as well.

He would use her, she cautioned herself. Use her shamelessly, then

discard her. The man was incapable of loving anyone.

She stared at the flames until her eyelids fluttered, then closed.

Exhausted beyond belief, she slept.

Brenna woke with a start. The fire had burned down to ashes. The room

was immersed in darkness. Had she heard a sound? Or had she only

dreamed it?

She lay very still, listening. Beyond the balcony she could hear the

flutter and chirp of night insects, the rustle of leaves in the trees,

the sighing of the wind.

She stiffened. There was the sound again. A door being opened,

perhaps? She strained, peering into the blackness. Had it been her

door?

She sat up, feeling a chill of apprehension.

"Morgan. Is that you?"

For a long moment there was only silence, then the slightest movement,

as though someone had stiffened at her words.

"Morgan." Her words were strained, angry.

"I know you are there."

"Were you hoping for your lover?" There was the stench of ale as the

whispered words hung between them.

"Who...?"

"Since you are alone, I would be your lover, too, my lady."

For a moment she was paralyzed with fear. Then she tried to twist

away, but a strong hand caught and held her. Before she could cry out

a hand closed over her mouth, cutting off her scream.

She felt the blade of a knife against her throat.

"You will do exactly as I say. Do you understand?"

She nodded, unable even to swallow, lest the blade pierce her flesh.

"Good. That is very good, my lady."

She heard a muted laugh that sent fresh terror through her veins. This

was a madman, who would not flinch at the thought of killing her.

Oh, for a dirk at her waist or a sword at her bedside. If she were not

a prisoner in this place, she would have a weapon with which to defend

herself. But she was rendered helpless.

"Take off your night shift."

"Please..."

"You have forgotten my first order. I shall have to teach you."

She felt a sharp pain, then a warmth along her arm. It took her a

moment to realize that her attacker had cut her. With a snarl of rage

she sank her teeth into his arm and bit down until he howled with

pain.

With a savage oath he slapped her once, then again, snapping her head

from one side to the other. While she still reeled from the blow, the

blade ripped through the delicate fabric of her night shift, slashing

it from hem to bodice.

"Now," he said with a laugh that seemed to grow more shrill with each

new act of terror, "I shall teach you my second lesson."

Shirtless, Morgan sprawled in a chaise pulled up before the fire. The

decanter of ale stood on a table beside him. It was "his intention to

drink the entire contents, if possible. At least then he would be

assured of sleep.

The anger he had allowed to fester inside himself for so long seemed

nothing compared with the disgust he felt for himself at the moment.

From the first minute he'd seen that cool, haughty Scotswoman, he'd

been behaving like a fool. If he were going to be brutally honest with

himself, he would have to admit that he dragged her here to England,

not to do the queen's bidding, but because he had not wanted her to

spend any more time with the apple-cheeked Hamish MacPherson. He had

experienced in those days at her castle his first pangs of jealousy.

And he had been too proud to admit it.

In fact, he thought, taking another long swallow of ale, it had been

his pride that had been wounded from the first. He had wanted her to

fall victim to his charms as most women did. If she had, he realized,

he would have used her and discarded her like all the rest. But that

damnably regal ice maiden would not behave like all the others. Aye,

that was the thorn. She was like no other woman he'd ever met. She

fought him when he least expected it. And fought like a soldier, if he

would be honest. He loved her strength of will, loved dueling with

her, seeing the way her eyes darkened like a summer's night before a

storm. He loved the way she looked, all soft and feminine. Loved the

way she constantly surprised him, saying or doing the unexpected. He

loved the color of her hair, black as midnight, and her skin, pale as

alabaster.

He poured another goblet, then paused, his hand in midair as the

thought exploded through him. He loved her. God in heaven. That was

the truth. He loved her. It was that simple. His heart contracted.

It was that complicated.

But what to do about it? His first marriage had been a mockery of

everything holy. It had left him badly scarred. What had Richard

said?

Aye, Morgan thought with a frown. That he was more a cripple than

Richard.

"Twas the truth. And after so long a time, he was no longer certain if

he dared to trust again. And after that scene with Brenna in the

sitting chamber, he might not get another chance. She was a delicate

lady whose sensibilities were no doubt offended by his unbridled

passion. He felt another wave of disgust.

He looked up at a sound. A night bird perhaps?

He lifted the goblet to his lips, then paused. There was a sound

coming from his sleeping chamber. Was Brenna crying? Dear God. Had

she bee
n crying all this time?

He set the goblet on the table and got to his feet. He would not

invade her privacy. He had done a thorough job of that earlier. He

would merely listen outside the door.

Brenna felt the mattress sag as her attacker leaned over her. In

desperation she clutched at the candlestick and brought it crashing

against his temple. He swore and snatched it from her hand, sending it

rolling across the floor.

One of his hands caught at her hair, pulling her head viciously when

she tried to turn away from his lips. Terror rose in her throat as she

twisted away, determined to evade his cruel hands.

"No," she shouted.

"You will have to kill me first."

"So be it."

She saw the dark shadow of the man loom up in the darkness, the knife

poised above his head. With one quick movement she rolled to one side

and the knife plunged harmlessly into the pillow where, just moments

before, her head had been.

With quick, jerking movements she slid off the bed and raced toward the

door. Before she could pull it open an arm closed around her neck.

She was hauled backward against the man's body while the arm continued

to press against her throat, cutting off her air. Though she fought

with a strength born of desperation, she could not breathe.

With both hands she clawed at the arm, struggling to break free. But

her attacker was too strong for her. She could feel her strength

ebbing. Strange lights seemed to dance before her eyes. There was a

loud buzzing in her ears. And then, just as she was beginning to lose

consciousness, her attacker was suddenly pulled backward. The

offending arm loosened its hold on her throat. She fell to the floor,

gasping for air.

"God in heaven. Brenna."

As Morgan's voice washed over her, light spilled in from the sitting

chamber, illuminating her where she lay choking. Blood streamed from

the cut on her arm and ran in little rivers, staining the rug beneath

her.

In quick strides Morgan was across the room, cradling Brenna in his

arms. She clung fiercely to him, fighting the sobs that were wrenched

from her bruised, aching throat.

They heard the sound of the outer door slam as the attacker made his

escape. As a soldier, Morgan's first thought was revenge for this

brutal attack. But one look at Brenna's helpless form and all thought

of vengeance faded. She needed him. Nothing else mattered.

Seeing the blood Morgan swore savagely, then lifted her tenderly, in

his arms and carried her to his bed.

"You are wounded." His face was ravaged as he looked at her.

"Oh, what has he done to you, love?"

Love. At his tender endearment she began to cry. And the more she

cried, the more concerned Morgan became.

"God in heaven, he hurt you."

She wiped at her tears, but they would not stop.

"It is not deep," she whispered, touching a hand to the cut on her

arm.

"Are there other, deeper wounds? I speak not of cuts and bruises, but

of more hateful ways to harm you. Did he-force you, love?"

"Nay. He tried. But you stopped him in time."

He felt a rush of relief. Burying his face in her hair, he held her

close against him and rocked her as tenderly as any infant.

"Thank God. If he had harmed you..."

She felt the shudders that passed through him. Wonder of wonders,

could it be that Morgan Grey was as frightened as she had been?

When he had composed himself he drew the coverings over her nakedness

and crossed to the fireplace, where he added kindling and a log to the