by Maya Banks
“They are prescription,” she said. “But it can wait. Really. I’m not working right now, and that’s when I needed them the most.”
“I like them on you,” he said gruffly. “And I don’t want to think about you going without the things you need, even for a minute.”
She smiled and then her brow furrowed as a much more pressing concern pushed its way to the forefront.
“Steele, do you think you could check into a local obstetrician? I haven’t had the first checkup since finding out I’m pregnant. I’m sure everything is okay, but I’d sure like to have the peace of mind of having a doctor oversee the care of this baby.”
His gaze softened. “Already ahead of you. I talked to Sam this morning to get the names of the doctors that Sophie and Rachel saw.”
Her mouth rounded into an O. “You told him I’m pregnant?”
He sent her a puzzled look. “Well, yeah. They’ll all find out later today when I tell them.”
Her cheeks warmed and she warred with pleasure and self-consciousness. On one hand, it gave her a giddy thrill that Steele was so openly embracing fatherhood, but on the other hand, she dreaded the looks and stares from the others. They’d have a hard enough time picturing the badass team leader as a daddy, but then they’d look at her and wonder how the hell the two of them ever hooked up to begin with.
“Um, how did he react to that piece of news?” she asked.
Steele shrugged. “He gave me the names of obstetricians and said there is a clinic in Murray, Kentucky, that both women have used. I didn’t tell him it was my baby, just that you’re pregnant. They’ll all find that out soon enough.”
She groaned and closed her eyes. “Oh God, Steele. He’ll probably draw the same conclusion that you initially did and think Caldwell forced himself on me and got me pregnant.”
Steele scowled. “It was a logical assumption at the time. And if that’s what he thinks, he won’t say anything. Sam’s not one to throw around personal information. I trust him more than I trust just about anyone else.”
She studied him thoughtfully. “I bet you don’t trust many people at all, do you?”
His brow furrowed. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
“Not saying it’s good or bad. Just an assessment.”
“I trust my team, otherwise I wouldn’t have them under my command. I trust Sam, Garrett and Donovan, otherwise I wouldn’t work for them. I trust Rio and his team as well. I may not always like working with them, but I know they have my back and they know I have theirs.”
She cocked her head to the side. “I’ve witnessed you and Rio at odds on several occasions. Why don’t you like each other?”
“I wouldn’t say we’re at odds. We’re just competitive. He thinks his team is the best. I know my team is the best. I don’t like or dislike him. I don’t feel strongly about him one way or another. He’s someone I have to work with and so a certain amount of civility is called for. Anything beyond that isn’t needed for the job to get done.”
She laughed and shook her head. “That is so something a guy would say.”
“In case it escaped your notice, I’m a guy.”
She slipped her hand between them and cupped his groin, giving it a light squeeze. His cock hardened immediately against her fingers.
“Oh, I think I’ve noticed,” she said.
“You’ve got about two seconds to move your hand or you’re going to be on your back with me inside you in five.”
She kissed him, giving him one more light squeeze. “That’s hardly a deterrent,” she murmured.
Then she pushed off him and scooted off the bed, leaving him staring after her.
As she dressed, she felt him watching and when she looked back, he was regarding her lazily, a thoughtful gleam in his eyes.
“Do I even want to know what you’re thinking?” she asked.
“I like that you don’t play games,” he said bluntly.
Her eyebrows went up. “What does that mean exactly?”
“You say it straight. You aren’t afraid to admit things even if you’re unsure of the reaction or if what you want is reciprocated. I like that you don’t play coy and that you seem to be as into me as I’m into you. There’s no guessing with you and I like that. It’s pretty damn refreshing.”
“You’re ‘into’ me?” she breathed. “I know you like me. I know you’re attracted to me. But for some reason, the way you said that just made it sound so much more serious. I like it. The way you said it. I’m going to savor those words for a while.”
He pushed up to his elbow, his gaze heated as it roamed up and down her body. “Yeah, I’m into you, Maren. I’m in deep and I don’t see any way out for a very long time. I hope to hell you’re in this with me because if not, things are going to get way messy.”
“If I was any more into you, I’d never find my way out,” she whispered.
“That’s not a bad thing from my point of view. I wouldn’t care if you got lost. As long as you were lost with me.”
“I’ve never had a conversation with a guy like this,” she said ruefully. “It kind of freaks me out in an oh-my-God way. A good way. I just don’t want to screw it up, Steele. I’m still figuring out my feelings for you, but I’ve been attracted to you for a very long time.”
She broke off and stared back at him, scared shitless to say the thing uppermost on her mind. But he liked that she was open. She just hoped she wasn’t being too open.
“I could so see myself falling in love with you,” she whispered. “But you need to tell me, Steele. Tell me if that’s not something I should let happen. I’m making myself vulnerable to you and you swore to protect me. I know that means physically, but I’ve exposed something to you I’ve never exposed to anyone else. My heart. And you have to swear to protect that too.”
He pushed off the bed and walked toward her, his eyes glinting with determination, the blue fierce around the black of his pupils. He palmed her face in his hands, holding her firmly in place as his lips descended to take possession of hers.
“Let me make this really damn easy for you, Maren. What I’m about to tell you I’ve never told—never felt—for another human being except my parents. I’m giving you something I’ve never given another person outside my family. If that doesn’t make me vulnerable to you, then I don’t know what does.”
“What?” she whispered.
“I’m pretty damn sure I’m already in love with you.”
Her eyes widened until she had to blink against the discomfort. “Really?”
“Yeah, really. I’ve never been in love before. I don’t know what it feels like. But if it feels like I’ve been gutted and ripped in two because you’re missing and I have no idea where the hell you are and if you’re hurt or afraid, then yeah, I’d say I’m in love with you. Or if it feels like I don’t ever want to be away from you, even for a few minutes, and that I want to spend every day of my life making sure you have everything you’ve ever wanted. Or maybe love is feeling like I’ve been handed the most precious gift anyone has ever given me because you’re here in my arms and you’re pregnant with my child.”
Tears made her vision completely blurry and she hastily wiped at her eyes, colliding with Steele’s hands, which were still firmly cupping her cheeks.
“Oh God, Steele, I think I love you too.”
He pulled her into his arms, crushing her against him. “Thank fuck I’m not the only one drowning here.”
“What do we do now?” she whispered.
He laughed against her, his chest rumbling with the effort. “Well, right now we’re going to go eat breakfast and afterward I’m taking you shopping for some clothes. And if that doesn’t say I love you, I don’t know what does. I don’t go shopping for anyone.”
CHAPTER 30
AFTER shopping for maternity clothes—Maren knew she wouldn’t be in normal sizes for much longer—Steele stuffed her purchases into the back of his SUV and they drove toward the Kelly compound.
/> It had been a while since Maren had last visited KGI on their home turf. Not since she’d traveled here to care for Nathan’s wife, Shea, when she’d undergone so much trauma.
She was impressed by the progress. Construction was nearing completion. All that was left was to finish the airstrip and then they would no longer have to use the Henry County airfield where the Kelly jets were currently hangared.
“Are all the houses completed?” she asked as they drove through what now resembled a miniature army base.
“There’s a spot for Marlene and Frank to build their house, but so far Marlene has managed to stall and she and Frank are remaining where they are. Sam doesn’t like it, but there’s not much he can do short of bodily moving them.”
“What about Donovan and Joe?”
“Still living in Sam’s old house on the lake. Donovan has actually broken ground on his house, but he’s taking his time and it’s been slow going. I don’t think he’s in a hurry. And Joe hasn’t even started. He’s pretty happy where he is.”
“Bet they’ll change their minds when they meet the right woman,” she murmured.
“A few months ago I would have disagreed,” he said ruefully. “Now, not so much.”
She smiled at him. He was cute in his befuddlement. But she had to hand it to him. He was taking their relationship—or whatever the hell it was they had—very well. He hadn’t seemed to fight it at all, though she had no idea what had gone on in his mind, especially when she’d been missing for so many weeks.
Maybe in that time he’d come to terms with his feelings for her. It had definitely solidified things in her mind. But then she’d already fallen hard and fast from the very first night they’d spent together.
“I’d love to see Rachel and the babies while I’m here,” she said. “Do you think she and Ethan would mind if I stopped by?”
“I don’t think they’d mind at all. We’ve all been worried sick about you, Maren. Everyone is going to be very relieved, and happy, to see you. You’re important to us all.”
Her cheeks warmed at the glowing compliment. It was nice to be regarded so highly. She counted them as friends—good friends—and it was nice to hear that they counted her the same.
They drove past the war room, where most of the planning and intelligence meetings took place. She perked up, curious because she’d imagined they’d go there, but now that they’d passed it, she was relieved. She wasn’t up for a sterile, intimidating meeting where she gave an accounting.
She relaxed when they pulled up to Sam’s sprawling house. There were no other vehicles besides Sam’s and Sophie’s. It looked to be a quiet meeting, whatever it turned out to be.
Steele reached over and squeezed her hand. “There’s something I want you to know so you aren’t unprepared and also so you know it’s not too late to back out. Everyone has arranged a little surprise party for you. They’re all thrilled and relieved to have you back and safe. I didn’t want to blindside you with this, so that’s why I’m ruining the surprise, so to speak. Sam told me about it this morning when I talked to him. He didn’t want me to tell you, but I don’t want to overwhelm you. So are you going to be okay with this? Because if you’d rather not deal with this today, I’ll absolutely turn around and I’ll let Sam know we can do it another time.”
She smiled, warmth traveling through her chest at the idea that everyone was so relieved she was safe and that they wanted to welcome her back. She squeezed his hand back. “That sounds really perfect, and I appreciate the heads-up so I don’t make an ass out of myself.”
“So you want to do it?”
“Yeah, let’s do it. I can’t wait to see everyone.”
Steele got out and waited at the front of the vehicle for her to meet him, and then he fell into step beside her, wrapping an arm loosely around her waist as he guided her toward the back of the house.
When the deck came into sight, Maren’s throat tightened. The entire Kelly clan was there and so were the KGI teams. All three of them!
A round of applause broke out and cheers erupted into the air. Charlotte was holding a fistful of balloon strings and she let them go, shrieking with delight as the balloons lifted and sailed away.
Maren stood stock-still, her mouth still open as Steele turned to her and grinned.
“Surprise,” he said in a low voice. “I told you that you’re very important to us, Maren.”
Tears filled her eyes and Steele immediately looked panicked.
“Don’t cry,” he said. “Whatever you do, don’t cry.”
She whipped her head back toward the steps of the deck, where the Kellys were now pouring down, and hastily wiped at her eyes so Steele wouldn’t melt down. Then she laughed. It bubbled up from inside her, and God, did it feel good to let go.
Sam was the first to arrive and he crushed her into a monstrous hug. She closed her eyes and absorbed the hug. She and Sam had been friends a long time. Of all the Kellys, she was closest to him. He called her often just to chat. Sometimes to ask for medical advice or general advice on matters bothering him. Theirs was an easy friendship. One she was very grateful for.
“I’m so glad you’re safe,” Sam muttered. “I was worried sick, Maren. Thank God you’re here where we can watch out for you.”
“I owe you and everyone in KGI a huge thank-you,” she said, as she pulled away from his hug. “You all did so much for me. Without you, I wouldn’t be here now.”
Sam took her hand and tugged her away from Steele and toward the steps. “Come on. Everyone’s dying to see you.”
She glanced back at Steele, who looked none too happy that Sam had spirited her away. She smiled and shrugged before turning back so she could see where she was going.
“Aunt Maren!” Charlotte yelled as soon as Sam and Maren hit the top of the steps.
“There’s my Cece!” Maren exclaimed as she swept her into her arms.
Then she groaned and clutched the wiggling toddler—well, she wasn’t really a toddler anymore—because her knees nearly buckled under the weight.
“Whoa there,” Steele murmured beside her. He swept in and plucked Charlotte from Maren’s arms and then settled her on his hip so she was still right beside Maren and within reaching distance. “You shouldn’t be lifting something so heavy.”
Maren leaned in to kiss Charlotte’s sweet baby cheeks and then tickled her stomach, listening to the giggles that erupted.
“Maren, we’re so happy you’re home,” Sophie said.
Maren hugged Sam’s wife. “I’m very happy to be here too. I can’t believe how big Charlotte is getting. It breaks my heart!”
And then Maren caught sight of Rachel Kelly, sitting on the other side of the huge deck, Ethan at her side, each holding a baby.
“Oh gosh, excuse me, Sophie.” Then she caught sight of everyone crowded around her, all waiting to offer their hugs and relief at her being safe. “Sorry, guys, give me just a minute please. I want to go see the twins.”
Laughter rang out all around.
“They do have a way of stealing the show,” Garrett said ruefully. “Ethan contributes greatly to that by swearing he has the most clever children to ever grace planet earth.”
“I’m sure the Kelly genes have nothing to do with that,” Maren said with a grin.
She pushed through the crowd, smiling at so many familiar, warm faces. It gave her heart a squeeze and left a comfortable glow in her chest. These people cared about her. Really cared. They were a second family to her, as beloved as her own parents and brother.
As soon as she neared Ethan and Rachel, Rachel passed the baby she was holding to Rusty, who was sitting on Rachel’s other side, and then she rapidly stood and enfolded Maren in a fierce hug.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” Rachel said. “We were all so worried. I was worried, Maren. You scared me to death.”
“You look so beautiful,” Maren said. “Motherhood agrees with you, Rachel. Introduce me to your babies? Both boys, from what I’ve heard.�
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Rachel beamed and then Ethan stood, still holding one of his sons. He wrapped one arm around Maren, hugging her to his side while still cradling the baby in his other.
“You look good with a baby in your arms, Ethan.”
Ethan smiled, and it warmed his entire face. Happiness and deep contentment shone in his eyes, and there was so much love in his gaze as he looked between his children and his wife that emotion knotted in Maren’s throat.
Rusty stood so that Maren was flanked by babies, and Rachel smiled proudly as she pulled the blanket away from their faces so Maren could see.
“This little guy Rusty is holding is Ian. And the one Ethan is holding is Mason.”
“Can I . . . can I hold one?” Maren whispered.
Rusty promptly handed over Ian, and Maren nestled the baby just right in her arms and then pulled the blanket under his chin so she could see his features.
Tears filled her eyes. This would be her soon. Holding her own child. Hers and Steele’s. She lifted her head, automatically searching him out in the crowd. His gaze was locked onto her, and it was clear that the image of her holding a baby had affected him just as profoundly.
If she’d doubted his earlier declaration of love, there wasn’t a single doubt now. His love was there for the entire world to see. No one could possibly look at him, at how he was looking at her, and believe for a minute that Steele’s heart wasn’t involved.
It was a look she’d never seen on his face. It was a window right into his soul, an opening he never gave anyone. And he didn’t look like he cared who saw it.
She glanced down at the baby and then back up at Steele, hoping he got the silent message.
He smiled at her, his entire face softening. He’d understood perfectly. He knew that she was telling him that soon this would be their child she held. She committed that smile and the love in his eyes to memory, never wanting to forget this moment.