She blinked. “Is that good?”
He smiled. “Oh yeah, it’s good.” It also spooked the shit out of him, but he didn’t have it in him to care.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Using a wet wipe, Riley cleaned the sprinkles of detergent powder from the floor of the laundry room. She didn’t look up, though she sensed someone enter. She’d heard their footsteps shuffling down the tunnel, she’d known they were coming. And now she could see one fluffy slipper tapping impatiently. Ha.
“I’ll bet you think you’re clever, don’t you?” sniped a witchy voice.
Riley cast Greta a bright smile. “Actually, I do think I’m quite clever.”
“It won’t last.”
“I’m assuming this is about Tao.” Done cleaning the floor, Riley dumped the wipe in the garbage can and then used another wipe to clean the excess powder from her fingers.
“I heard he moved into your room last week.”
She’d said it as if she’d shrewdly gotten her hands on classified information. “Well, it wasn’t exactly a secret,” said Riley, dropping the second wipe in the trash.
Greta advanced farther into the room, arms folded. “I also heard someone in your flock says you manipulated her boy into shooting his friends. It wouldn’t surprise me if it were true. Not one bit.”
“Ooh, wait a sec while I grab a pen. I just want to add that to my list of stuff I couldn’t give a rat’s ass about.”
Greta’s mouth tightened. “Has Tao asked you to imprint yet?”
Sitting on the plastic chair opposite the rows of washing machines and dryers that were lined up against the wall, Riley lifted her face to the ceiling fan. “Our relationship’s none of your business, Gretchen.”
“It’s Greta. And it is my business, I’m practically his mother!”
“Well, maybe he’d be better adjusted if you weren’t.”
“I wouldn’t be so smug that you have him if I were you.”
Oh, if only the hum and slurp of the washing machines would drown out the old witch. She briefly considered spilling the liquid softener all over the floor so she could watch Greta do an interpretation of Swan Lake. “As much as I enjoy our little chats—”
“If he has asked you to imprint, bear in mind one thing.” Greta leaned forward, smirking. “You aren’t the first he’s asked.”
An ice-cold fist seemed to punch into Riley’s chest. Her raven froze, watchful.
“It’s true. Taryn was the first,” Greta added with utter delight.
Taryn? The crone had to be kidding. Trey would have snapped Tao’s neck like a twig for making a move on his mate. The Alpha male took possessiveness to a whole new level.
“That was back when Trey didn’t know the hussy was his true mate—it would have been better for us all if he didn’t find out. You see, when she first came here, the plan was for her to leave after a few months of faking being Trey’s mate . . . and Tao was prepared to leave the pack with her.”
Speechless, Riley struggled to process what she’d heard. She wanted it to be a lie, but she could see the truth right there in Greta’s eyes . . . eyes her raven wanted to peck right out.
“So be smug all you like, but know that you’re playing second fiddle to Taryn. It’s her he wants as his mate.”
Refusing to reveal any of her pain, Riley shrugged. “Can’t say I blame him. Taryn’s awesome.” The crone jerked back with a frown. “What did you think I was going to do? Rant and rave and kick him to the curb? Oh, my dear, dear Gretchen, you’ll have to do better than that.”
Hearing a buzzer, Riley went straight to the washing machine and pulled open the door. The lavender smell of the detergent hit her face. She breathed it in, using it to calm herself and her raven. Ignoring Greta, she then hummed softly to herself as she began moving the wet laundry to the nearest dryer. Snarling at the dismissive act, the witch finally left. Only then did Riley let her shoulders slump. A wet shirt fell from her shaky fingers. It felt like the wind had been knocked right out of her.
Shock. Hurt. Humiliation. Disbelief. Each insidious emotion curdled in her stomach and made her chest tighten. She pressed down on her breastbone, trying to think through it all.
It was hard enough to hear that Tao had once wanted to imprint with someone. The bitch of the matter was that Riley knew that someone. It was a person she’d spent time with, laughed with, and gotten blind drunk with. And all that time, Taryn had known—hell, the whole pack probably knew—that Tao had once wanted her as his mate. It was humiliating that Riley hadn’t known.
Did he still feel that way about Taryn? She didn’t think so. Riley had seen them interact plenty of times, but never once had she sensed that he yearned for Taryn. But maybe she simply hadn’t noticed it.
Or maybe she was just being paranoid because she was looking at the whole thing through jealous vision. She loathed that emotion, but it wouldn’t fuck off. Had Tao ever kissed Taryn? Touched her the way he’d touched Riley? Somehow she doubted it. Trey surely would have otherwise killed him long ago. That only eased the jealousy a little, though.
Dammit, someone should have told her. Someone should have warned her so that Greta couldn’t have blindsided her with it. And fuck, was Riley pissed with every wolf in the pack for not saying a word about it. But then, she thought, of course they hadn’t told her. They’d known it might have made her feel awkward to cross the pack mate line with Tao, and they were too intent on bringing her and him together.
While she could understand their reasoning, that didn’t make it okay. In fact, she felt a little betrayed by these people she’d slowly but surely started to trust. And she didn’t know what to do about it.
Eating his BLT, Tao listened hard for approaching footsteps. It wasn’t like Riley to be late for lunch, especially since she liked to settle the kids into their seats and fill their plates for them. His wolf didn’t like it that she wasn’t there; he missed her. Every time Tao caught a whiff of her scent on his skin or his clothes, it made both him and his wolf miss her that little bit more.
“I noticed the raven’s not around,” said Greta with a satisfied smile, an odd note to her voice that caught his wolf’s attention. “I wonder why that could be.”
Brow creased, Makenna paused with her hot dog halfway to her mouth. “I know she went to do her laundry. I haven’t seen or heard from her since. She should be done by now.”
Tao listened to Makenna’s words, but his eyes were locked on Greta, on the sly curve of her mouth, the superior jut of the chin, and her air of exaggerated casualness. His wolf’s hackles rose. “What did you do?”
She put a hand to her chest, eyes smiling. “I haven’t done a thing,”
He leaned forward, aggression radiating from him. “What did you do?” A tense silence had fallen, and everyone’s attention was on him and Greta.
“Now, Tao—”
“I’ve known you all my life and I know that smile means you’ve done something to hurt someone and you’re proud of it.” Right then his instincts were screaming at him to get to Riley. “So I’ll ask again, what did you do?”
Savannah crouched in her seat, hissing at Greta.
“Someone get hold of that child before she—” Greta broke off as Savannah hissed again. “See, vicious.”
“Leave her the fuck alone,” Tao clipped, shocking Greta into silence. His wolf surged to the surface, making his eyes flash wolf. The old woman swallowed hard.
“Greta,” Trey growled, “answer his question now.”
Tao stilled at the sound of footsteps, but he didn’t look away from Greta.
She patted her hair. “The raven and I may have had a slight disagreement.”
How very vague. “About what?”
Greta averted her eyes.
“About what?” he repeated.
Dark-red fruit, coconut milk, and black lace.
Tao looked up as Riley strolled in like she didn’t have a care in the world. Then she took in the sight of Savannah snarling at Gret
a, and her eyes went hard.
“What’s going on?” Riley stroked her hand down Savannah’s hair. “Did she upset you, sweetheart?”
Head tilted, the little viper said, “I thought she’d upset you.”
“Upset me?” Riley pursed her lips. “Well, it does upset me that she won’t shave the downy hairs from her chinny chin chin, but that’s pretty much it.”
Savannah giggled and relaxed in her chair, and the rest of the table seemed to let out a collective breath. Tao remained tense. Riley might look fine, but she wasn’t fooling him or his wolf—they knew her too well at this point.
As she slid onto the chair beside him, he said, “You’re late.” It wasn’t a reprimand, just a statement of fact.
She shrugged. “I was talking with Ethan.”
He sensed that that was the truth. He also sensed that she was leaving something out. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” said Riley, unprepared to discuss it here in front of everyone. She’d keep her pain to herself, thankyouverymuch. And she definitely wouldn’t expose the kids to what should be a purely adult conversation, especially Kye—who’d probably feel a little mixed up if he knew his bodyguard had once wanted to mate with his mom.
Casting Greta a look of challenge, Riley scooped up some pasta and put it on her plate. Her raven flapped her wings at the old bitch. Honestly, there had been a brief moment when Riley had thought of staying in her room—she wasn’t in the mood to spend time with a bunch of people she was a little pissed off with. But no way would she let Greta cause her to hide away in her room. Nuh-uh. And she was annoyed with herself for even considering it.
As Tao ate the rest of his BLT, he watched Riley closely. In between eating her pasta and chatting with Zac, she teased the kids and topped up their plates. She also seemed to be deliberately avoiding making eye contact with anyone else.
Knowing Greta, she’d most likely accused Riley of the same crime that Shirley had, just to hurt her. He sent the old woman a hard look. She didn’t look so superior now. In fact, she was watching Riley with a mixture of confusion and . . . no, that couldn’t be respect. If she’d thought that hurting Riley would make his little raven isolate herself, she was gravely underestimating her strength.
Draping his arm across Riley’s back, Tao rested his hand in the crook of her neck and used his thumb to rub her nape. She stilled beneath his hand. It was a subtle rejection, but it was a rejection all the same. A growl built in his chest—a noise that came from both man and wolf. He spoke low in her ear. “What’s wrong?”
“I told you, nothing.”
He nipped her ear at the lie and said quietly, “Our room, now.”
“I’m trying to eat here.” The problem for Riley was that every forkful tasted like rubber. Her emotions were too messed up, and her raven was still in a sour mood. But she wasn’t sure she was ready to talk about what she’d learned, not sure she was ready to hear that just maybe there was some truth in Greta’s claim that Taryn was his first choice. “Have another sandwich or something.”
“Baby, you’re hurting and I hate it. It’s killing me. We’re going to our room so you can tell me why and I can fix it.” Cupping her elbow, he brought her to her feet. He knew she wanted to resist. He also knew she wouldn’t cause a scene in front of the kids.
Neither of them said a word as they made their way through the tunnels. Once they were in their bedroom, he folded his arms. “What did Greta say to you? I know she upset you somehow. Tell me.”
Riley sighed. “She brought up Wade. She said she wouldn’t be surprised if Shirley’s accusations were true. That’s not something I wasn’t expecting.”
“What else? Don’t play dumb, Riley. You tensed up when I touched you, like I’ve done something to hurt you. If I have, I want to know what it is.”
“You haven’t hurt me. Fine, okay, you have. I would just rather you had told me so that Greta couldn’t have sucker punched me with it.”
He mentally ran through the possibilities of what she could mean but came up blank. “Told you what?”
Riley folded her arms. “About the none-too-little matter of you asking Taryn to imprint with you.”
He closed his eyes. “Fuck.”
“I’m not naïve, I know you have a past and I accept that. I can accept this too, it’s just . . . why didn’t you tell me? You know what, we don’t need to talk about it. It’s your business. I would just rather have heard it from you, that’s all.”
He moved into her personal space. “You’re mine, I’m yours, which means my business is your business. You want to hear about it, I’ll tell you. But let me make it clear that Taryn is not an ex. If she had been, I would have mentioned that. But I never kissed her, never even touched her.”
Admittedly, Riley did feel a little better on hearing that. “Okay.”
“I did want to imprint with her back then. Leaving the pack would have been damn fucking hard to do, but it would have been harder if I hadn’t. When I was a kid, my mother had to deal with one of my dad’s ex-bed-buddies hanging around, causing trouble for her. It was hard for everyone. That’s part of the reason I resisted you. I didn’t want things to be awkward for you, me, your mate, or—if through some unlikely miracle I ever mated—mine.”
Before she asked why he thought it would be an unlikely miracle, he was speaking again.
“Even then, I knew I wouldn’t have been Taryn’s first choice, but I wanted her anyway. It wasn’t because I cared deeply for her, it was because she’s strong and would never have needed me. I could have held myself back from her, and there would have been no pressure to ‘complete’ her the way true mates are supposed to complete each other.”
Having been unprepared for that answer, she asked, “You fear the depth of commitment that comes with mating?”
“Two people completing each other doesn’t always work so well. My brother’s mate had these expectations of the perfect guy that he can never live up to, no matter what he does—how could anyone? She spends her days criticizing him, but that doesn’t stop her from relying on him, needing him, and leaning on him until she’s also weighing on him.”
And that was no doubt part of why he was so cynical about relationships, she thought. “Not all love is unequal and codependent.”
“No, it’s not. But the idea that I have a mate out there expecting me to be her fairy-tale prince scares the shit out of me. How could I ever complete anyone, Riley? I’m a total asshole. Abrasive, selfish, tactless. The list goes on.”
“You’re not an asshole, Tao. You can be an asshole when you feel like it, but you’re not an asshole.”
“Of course I am. My point is that I wanted her for all the wrong reasons. I realized that pretty quickly, and I stopped wanting her before she and Trey even had a mating bond. That’s the God’s honest truth.” He cupped her throat with both hands. “I honestly wasn’t keeping it a secret from you. I can understand that it’s definitely not a small thing to you, but it feels small to me because it wasn’t a key point in my life. It’s so far in the past I never even think about it, so it didn’t occur to me to tell you.” He pulled her to him, nuzzling her neck. “I’m sorry, baby. That’s the second time I’ve hurt you in the space of a week. It doesn’t seem fair that I’m making you miserable while you make me happy.”
“How do I make you happy?”
“You don’t have to do anything to make me happy. It just happens when you’re around.”
Her mouth curled just a little. He hadn’t said it to flatter her, he’d simply stated what he felt was a fact. The whole him-wanting-to-imprint-with-Taryn thing still stung, but she was less upset now that she knew he hadn’t made a conscious decision not to tell her. Her raven was a little less tense, though she also remained wary. “You don’t make me miserable.”
Tao smoothed his hands down to her shoulders. “I’m going to repeat this because in your position it would play on my mind. I do not want Taryn. I care about her just as I do my other pack mates,
but that’s it. Nothing more. Nothing less. And I have no regrets at all that we didn’t imprint. None whatsoever.”
Now that some of the jealousy had slipped away, Riley could look at the whole thing more rationally. She could be sure that she’d never once seen him look at Taryn with longing. “Greta said I was playing second fiddle.”
“Fuck Greta. She knows that’s bullshit. You’re not second to anyone. You come first to me. Understand?”
She nodded. “Okay.”
“Good.” He kissed her softly and stroked her hair, soothing and gentling, relieved she didn’t tense again. His wolf, still a little anxious, rubbed up against her. “I need to have a good, long talk with Greta.”
Riley shivered at the lethal note to his growl. It always made her tingly when he got all overprotective, but she’d never let him know that. “She’s not worth it.”
“She deliberately set out to hurt you.”
“Hey, I’m a big girl, you know.”
“But you’re my girl. And I don’t want anyone hurting my girl.” He rubbed his nose against hers. “I especially don’t want to be the reason she’s hurt.”
“I’m fine now, really.”
He stroked the bite mark he’d left on her pulse. “I’ve never marked anyone before. Not even accidentally.” He liked rough sex, and some people could get so carried away that they left a mark. But he never had.
“You marked me accidentally the first night we slept together,” she pointed out. “Then again, you were wasted.”
“I was wasted, but I didn’t mark you by accident. I knew exactly what I was doing.” Even totally hammered, he’d been fully aware that he was leaving his brand on her. It was something he’d wanted to do for a very long time.
His head snapped up at the knock on the door. It was a knock so light that it could only be from one of the kids.
“I’ll get it.” Riley nipped his lip hard when he didn’t release her. With a playful growl, he stepped back so she could open the door. She wasn’t in the least bit surprised to find Savannah standing there. “Hey, sweetheart.”