Almost like he was fucking me with his cock.
The thought almost stopped me cold. Because it wasn’t fear or loathing I felt when I imagined Jude moving inside me. It was desire. Need. Lust. I wanted him in me—really wanted him.
I moved back, out of reach of his mouth and started to tell him I felt ready but the look in his eyes stopped me. They were burning and hooded, so filled with longing and desire it took my breath away. His mouth was shiny with my juices, his lips red from our prolonged erotic contact.
“Kiss me,” he rasped and it wasn’t a request.
Leaning over I pressed my mouth to his, moaning softly when I tasted myself on him. Jude pressed his tongue rhythmically into my mouth, just as he had done to my pussy a few moments earlier. I twined my fingers through his hair and held on tight, kissing and sucking and licking, trying to get every last trace of my honey from his lips.
The way Jude kissed me—and let me kiss him—was amazing. But now more than ever, I knew I wanted more. So at last I straightened up and looked at him.
“Jude,” I murmured. “I want you in me.”
“Are you sure?” Some of the lust in his eyes faded to concern. “Really sure this time? I don’t want you to rush yourself or do anything you’re not ready to do.”
“I’m sure,” I said and this time there was no niggling little voice of doubt at the back of my brain. I was ready for him, body and soul.
When I scooted lower, straddling his hips instead of his chest, I saw that Jude was ready for me too. His shaft was rigid, almost pulsing it was so hard, and the head of it was glossy with his precum. He moaned raggedly as I circled it with my fingers and I knew if he hadn’t been cuffed to the bed, his hands would have been all over me, stroking my breasts…caressing my thighs…teasing my pussy.
I liked the idea so much I almost uncuffed him right then and there. But I remembered the way I had felt ready before and then freaked out. Better to leave him as he was and see how I reacted to the feel of his long cock entering me before I rashly decided that I was healed enough emotionally to let him go.
I had him in my hand and was ready to start but I felt…awkward…unsure. I’d seen sex in movies and I had a vibrator I used regularly but it seemed strange to just saddle up and mount him while he lay there supine on the bed.
Jude must have seen the uncertainty on my face because he lifted his head and caught my eyes with his own. “Are you all right, Luz?”
“I am, I really am,” I told him truthfully. “And I want to do this but it seems strange to just, I don’t know…stick it in.”
Jude rumbled laughter. “Then don’t just ‘stick it in’ as you put it. Take your time. Rub me against yourself. Make yourself feel good first.”
It sounded like good advice to me. Grasping him firmly in one hand, I lowered myself until I could stroke the broad head of his shaft over my slippery inner folds. Jude and I moaned at the same time as he slid over me, teasing the heated pearl of my clit with his cock.
“Like this?” I asked, as I did it again, looking into his eyes.
“Just like that, beloved.” He groaned again. “That’s right—use me to make yourself feel good, work yourself against me, Luz.”
I was really beginning to get into it now. The feel of his hot, hard shaft slipping back and forth over my open pussy and hearing Jude’s low groans as I rubbed him against me was incredibly arousing. It must have been for him too. Judging from the hot look in his eyes and the way his hands were clenched into fists, he was enjoying the show I was putting on and the feel of my pussy against his cock almost as much as I was.
It was inevitable that his shaft would finally find entry to my channel. I was enjoying myself too much to pay attention to how far I was letting him slide and before I knew it, the broad, plum-shaped head was lodged firmly at the entrance to my pussy. In fact, it was almost halfway inside me before I realized what was happening and stopped.
“Luz?” Jude looked at me again, lust and concern mingling in his face. “You can end this now, if you need to,” he said though I could tell from the tension in his big body how much he wanted me to continue. “It’s all right. Just stop.”
But this was what I had come here to do and by now I not only needed to do it—I wanted to. Wanted to feel Jude inside me, filling me to the limit. Wanted to give myself to him and see the look in his eyes when he came inside me. Was I still a little frightened? Yes, I had to admit to myself. But my desire for Jude and the trust I felt for him was enough to overcome that with a stronger, deeper emotion.
Looking him in the eye, I said, “I don’t want to stop.” And then, my legs trembling with the effort to hold myself in position, I began to lower myself down.
Of course, it was easier said than done. I’d had nothing inside me but a very slim wand vibrator and Jude was considerably longer and over twice as thick as my little toy. I bit my lower lip as I felt him stretch me while he slid deeper and deeper into me, inch by inch.
“Slowly, beloved,” Jude urged me, watching as I lowered myself onto him. “I don’t want to hurt you—you’re very tight.”
“I know,” I said softly, still trying to ease him into me. “I’m sorry.”
Jude shook his head. “Don’t apologize, Luz. You’re beautiful. Beautiful and brave, taking me inside you like this. You have no idea how erotic it is to watch your tight pussy sliding down onto my shaft.”
It was an incredibly hot sight, watching his thick cock disappear into my cunt. And the pleasure wasn’t purely visual, either. Despite the stretching feeling as he entered me, it felt good too—felt right to be filled with him so intimately. And because I was the one in control I had no fear or anxiety about having him inside me. I knew at any time I wanted I could get up and walk away. Though I had no wish to do that, the knowledge that I could if I wanted to gave me the strength and confidence to keep going. And then finally, his pelvis was flush with mine and I knew he was all the way inside me.
I moaned softly as the head of his cock pressed hard against the end of my channel and Jude gave an answering groan. But to give him credit, he didn’t move a muscle though every instinct he had must have been screaming for him to thrust into me as hard as he could.
Bracing my hands on his torso, I rested and trying to get used to being filled with him. Jude was as still as a stone underneath me but I could feel his cock throbbing with need, stretching me even as we were both perfectly still. At last I looked up at him.
“How does it feel?” He was watching me with half-lidded eyes, desire written plainly on his face.
“Good,” I said. “I feel…I’ve never felt this full before. But I think I like it.” I moved tentatively and Jude made a low, appreciative sound.
“That’s right,” he growled softly. “Do that again, Luz. Move up and down—fuck yourself on me.”
The hot, dirty words seemed to ignite something inside me. With a soft moan of pleasure, I lifted myself so that several inches of his long shaft slid out of me and then lowered myself again until I felt him all the way inside me once more. Then I did it again…and again.
Each time I raised off him a little more and let myself down a little harder, a little faster. Jude groaned along with me on each deep penetration, his fangs showing in a silent snarl of effort as he forced himself to hold back and let me do whatever I needed to do. But at last, my own efforts weren’t enough—I needed more of him and I needed it now.
“Jude,” I gasped, grinding against him as I tried unsuccessfully to get more of a rhythm. “I need more…need you…”
“What do you need?” His eyes blazed at me. “Tell me, Luz—say it.”
“I need…need you to help me,” I moaned. “Please, Jude, I’m so close but I just can’t…quite…make it. Fuck me.”
My words seemed to set something loose inside him—some animal of pure lust he’d been keeping tightly chained suddenly slipped its leash and ran free. With a low roar, he pulled back and then surged upward, thrusting his shaft to th
e hilt into my pussy and sending shock waves of pleasure through my entire body.
I gasped at the sudden invasion, loving the feeling of him pounding into me. Jude had been holding back for ages by now and I realized that, having invited him to break his own self-imposed restraint, I was in for a wild ride.
Leaning back, I braced my hands against his thighs, opening myself for him completely as he fucked me. I could feel the muscles of his long legs moving under me, could see his biceps knotting and his fists clenching with effort as he thrust up into me again and again. I’m sure it would have been easier for him if his hands had been free but he had been right in telling that he could still perform—even chained down he was beyond amazing.
“Jude…oh God, Jude.” I was moaning his name, unable to stop as I felt myself climbing to another orgasm. I was close and getting closer all the time but I still needed a little something more.
Despite the effort he was putting in, Jude obviously noticed my problem.
“Touch yourself for me, Luz,” he said hoarsely, never stopping the deep, delicious rhythm he’d established. “Pet your pussy while I fuck you—let me see you make yourself come.”
Once again his hot words had an electric effect on me. Though I had never imagined doing anything so intimate for a lover, I let my fingers trail down to where we were joined. Then, keeping my eyes locked with his, I began to stroke the sensitive button of my clit as he continued to thrust inside me.
“Does that feel good?” His voice was ragged. “Tell me how it feels, Luz.”
“Feels wonderful,” I moaned. “Not…not as good as you though. As your tongue.”
His eyes flashed. “Love to eat your sweet little cunt. Love to feel you quivering all around me when you come.”
“I…I love it too.” The intimacy of letting him watch me touch myself along with his hard, driving thrusts inside me was too much. With a low moan, I felt myself tipping over the edge of orgasm as pleasure sparked through my veins. I came so hard I actually saw stars for a moment—white-hot explosions in front of my eyes that made me wonder if I was going to pass out. I didn’t though, and when my vision cleared, I realized that Jude was coming too.
I could feel my inner muscles clenching around him, milking him like a fist and then, with a low groan, he pressed up, entering me as deeply as he could, and began to pulse inside me. I didn’t know what other women felt at this moment or if they felt anything at all, but with Jude, it was an incredibly intense moment. I could actually feel his cum filling me, feel its heat spilling into me as he released.
For a moment we were tense, straining against each other as the pleasure overwhelmed us. I could have sworn I felt Jude’s pleasure as well as my own—his joy at having me, his need to keep me near. Or maybe I only I thought I did. But whatever the cause, the result was the same. It was an emotional and physical release more intense than any I had ever experienced in my life.
I put my head on his chest and cried.
Chapter Eleven
“Luz? Luz, are you all right?” Jude’s deep voice was as close to panic as I had ever heard it and I knew I had to get hold of myself. But no matter what I did, the tears wouldn’t stop.
“I-I’m fine,” I said, or tried to say, anyway.
“Did I hurt you?” he demanded. “Please, tell me—I’m getting flashes from you but they’re jumbled.”
I took a deep breath and was able to at least slow the tears if not stop them all together. “No,” I said truthfully. “I mean, I’m pretty sure I’ll be sore for a while, but in a good way.”
“Then why are you crying?” he asked gently. “Was it harder than you thought it would be?”
“No, nothing like that. It was easier…better…just so much more than anything I’d ever imagined.” I took another deep breath and wiped my eyes with my fingers. “I think the word I’m looking for is intense. There at the end—it was almost like I could feel you—feel the way you felt in me…” I shook my head. “I don’t know how to put it, but it was amazing.”
He smiled. “I thought it was pretty amazing too. But I think my arms are going numb.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry!” I hopped off the bed and ran to get the key out of the armoire. I fumbled around for a minute under a stack of silk boxers until I found it and then ran to let Jude out of the cuffs. The minute I unlocked them he sat up and reached for me. I went to his arms willingly and snuggled against his chest, enjoying the closeness. He held me to him and pressed a kiss to the top of my head.
“How did you know?” I asked, trying unsuccessfully to repress a yawn. Now that the tears had gone, an overwhelming exhaustion had taken their place. I had been up literally all night with enough emotional turmoil to wear me out twenty times over.
“How did I know what?”
“That letting me be in control would help.”
He shrugged. “I didn’t know. But I hoped it would—it was the only thing I could think of under the circumstances.”
“The circumstances being your crazy girlfriend barging in on you in the middle of the night and demanding sex, right?” I laughed and then realized what I’d said. “Uh, not that I’m your girlfriend or anything. I mean we haven’t even known each other that long and you’re a vamp and I’m a were which means we’re—”
“Perfect for each other,” Jude finished for me, which was pretty much the exact opposite of what I had been going to say. “And as for you being my ‘girlfriend’,” he continued. “I was hoping for something a little more permanent. But I don’t mind settling for that to start with.”
“Wow.” I looked up to see he was smiling down at me. “No fear of commitment issues with you, huh?”
He shook his head. “Why should I fear to commit to the one who is right for me?”
“Wow,” I said again because I didn’t know what else to say. “Are we really going to have this conversation now?”
Jude frowned. “What conversation?”
“You know…the one where we decide we’re a couple?”
He leaned down and kissed my cheek. “I thought that was already decided.”
“But, Jude, seriously…we come from such different backgrounds. Our families will hate each other.”
“My parents have been dead for decades. And I was under the impression that, aside from your younger brother, you didn’t care much for yours.”
“That’s true,” I admitted.
“Then there is no problem,” he said, sounding completely logical. “We should be together, Luz—be together forever. Why let convention stand in the way when you have found true love?”
I shook my head, unable to believe him. “So we’re having that conversation too?”
Jude smiled. “Which conversation is that?”
“You know…” I gestured vaguely. “The L word conversation. As in who’s going to say it first and will the other person say it too or—”
“I love you.” He gave me a serious look. “Does that take care of the issue?”
“I, uh…give me a minute.” I shook my head, feeling dazed. “I don’t know what to say.”
“That’s all right.” Jude seemed completely comfortable with my uncertainty. “Take some time to think about it. But I wanted you to know how I feel.”
I thought of the way he’d been so patient with me, how easy it was to talk to him. And let’s not forget what an incredible lover he was. I didn’t have any experience but from what I’d heard from other women, the sexual chemistry we shared was something to be envied—especially considering the trauma in my past. Yet Jude had helped me overcome that old pain to enjoy sex—something I would never have believed possible. He was a wonderful guy, even if he was a vampire. And to tell the truth, I kind of liked the biting and blood sharing we’d done. More than liked it. Just as I more than liked him.
“I think…I think I love you too,” I said tentatively.
Jude laughed. “There’s a rousing agreement.”
“No, it’s just…I’ve never felt
this way before,” I protested.
“What way?” He lifted my chin, capturing my eyes with his own.
“Like…like I always want to be with you. Like just being near you makes my whole day better—uh, or my whole night, I guess.” I looked at him in wonder. “You know, I do love you.”
Jude kissed me—a long, slow kiss that took my breath away. “Luz…you are my light in the darkness.”
I kissed him back, marveling at this new development. It seemed so obvious now that we’d said it out loud. But I had spent so much time telling myself why we shouldn’t be together that I hadn’t considered why we should. Despite our differences, we fit together perfectly and made each other happy. Jude was right—we belonged together.
“So since we’ve gone from business associates to lovers, I guess I should refund the money you gave me,” I said, only half joking.
“Absolutely not.” Jude shook his head firmly. “And besides, who said our business agreement was dissolved? I still want to exchange blood with you again, at least one more time.”
“Why one more time?” I asked curiously. “Is three the magic number or something?”
“You could say that.” He smiled. “Or maybe I just like the way you taste. And you know, now that you have a vampire for a lover, you might have to get used to being bitten sometimes—if you don’t mind.”
“I don’t mind.” I felt a warm sexual thrill run up my spine. “Actually, you can bite me now, if you want to.”
Jude gave me a lingering kiss on my neck and I could feel my pulse racing under his lips. “A tempting offer. But it’s almost dawn and I would like to take my time. Maybe tomorrow night?”
“It’s a date,” I said, smiling. And then I yawned. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’ve just been up for almost twenty-four hours at this point.”
“A lot has happened to you tonight,” Jude observed. “Of course you’re tired.”
I was more than tired. Suddenly I was dead beat. So exhausted I could barely keep my eyes open. Jude seemed to understand because he tucked me carefully between the red satin sheets and kissed me lightly on the forehead.