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His keen hearing picked up soft footsteps and a female curse. He slowed his pace. Kat followed him. It was tempting to leave her behind. She wouldn’t have a chance of finding him if he sprinted off but curiosity rose. He reached a shadowed area under a tree and sat on the ground, staring out at the pond. Lights reflected off it, the water slightly rippling from the wind.
She approached but he didn’t turn his head. When she reached him, he glanced at her once, really taking in her appearance. The oversized T-shirt she wore was three times too big and thin cotton pants hugged her legs. Her bare feet caused him to frown. They were probably too tender to go barefoot outside since humans were rarely without shoes. It wasn’t his concern though. She’d made the choice to follow him into the night.
A sudden weariness settled in. He was tired but it wasn’t the kind that sleep could cure. Fury had been right. He’d carried a burden alone and the male deserved to know the truth. He might not like the answers he received. It might even make them enemies.
Was he willing to risk it? He almost wished he could go back in time and just tell Fury the truth. Then he’d know for sure. It wasn’t as if things could get worse. He was a loner at the NSO. There were mental walls he had put in place. Perhaps it was time to tear them down, as Fury had suggested.
Kat sat down under the tree next to the brooding man she’d followed. Darkness turned his head. Enough moonlight peeked through the trees for her to make out most of his features.
“Hi.”
“I allowed you to trail me and you did. Why are you here?”
“I was worried about you.” She shrugged, getting more comfortable. “Are you all right? That looked pretty intense. Do you fight with other New Species often?”
He sighed, looking away. “I’m different.”
Sympathy welled. “Because of what was done to you by that guy who took you and your brothers?” She really hated Darwin Havings at that moment and hoped he’d screw up soon and make it possible for the authorities to capture him. He’d never know freedom again once the government got their hands on him.
“Yes.”
Darkness wasn’t the most talkative person. She glanced around. The park was abandoned at night and the water in front of them looked pretty and the muted sounds were soothing. She looked at him.
“Do you come here often?”
“Yes.” He watched her as well. “It gives me a sense of peace.”
She let that information sink in. “Demons are a horrible thing to live with.”
He was silent for a full minute and she wondered if he was done talking. It might have been a mistake to follow him but she just hadn’t been able to resist after the scene she’d witnessed.
“He was angry because I don’t talk when I should.” His words were spoken so softly that she strained to hear them.
“That was what the fight was about?”
“Yes.”
The silence stretched again. She wanted to help him somehow. “Do you want to talk about it? That can help at times.”
“That depends.”
She waited for him to say more but a good minute passed. She finally broke the silence. “On what?”
He took a deep breath, blew it out. “Who are you going to repeat it to?”
“I don’t understand.”
“Yes you do.”
She really didn’t. He cleared it up though.
“Are you on duty or off right now, Kat?”
She wondered again if he still suspected she wasn’t who she said she was. “I’m off duty. What is said will stay between us. I know you don’t trust me but you can.” She meant it.
He hesitated, turned his head and stared out at the vast darkness of the water. “Fury wants to know more about what happened to my brothers.”
“Aren’t they here somewhere?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“Reservation?”
He was quiet for a full minute. “They are dead.”
Bad scenarios filled her head. Had Havings had them killed? Had they been returned to Mercile Industries and died there? Some had died when it had been seized by government agencies. Others had died during rescue attempts at other locations. There’d been that explosion linked to a facility associated with Mercile Industries. Everyone had died according to the news reports. The NSO didn’t share too much information with the general public but she got her intel from reliable sources. The NSO had tried to breach the lower floors of the company but it had been rigged to explode. Everyone below ground had died before they could be rescued.
“I’m sorry.” She wanted to ask for details but resisted.
He stared out across the water. “I am as well. Fury wants me to speak of them but I refuse.”
“Why?”
“It’s not a happy story to tell. I don’t want him to suffer. He’s a good male.”
She let that sink in. “Why would he be hurt?”
“They were his brothers too.”
Shock rolled through her. “You’re related to Fury North?”
He jerked his head in her direction and growled low.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it. I just didn’t expect that.”
“We’re half brothers. Are you going to share that information?”
“No.”
She was tempted to ask him who he thought she’d tell but refrained. She had been stunned when she’d heard noises and stepped out onto the patio to see Darkness fighting another guy. Security had rushed to the scene and broken it up pretty fast but she’d identified his opponent. Fury North was an NSO celebrity, almost as popular and well-known as Justice North.
“He wants us to be closer but I don’t allow anyone to get too close.”
Darkness might suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder. She guessed he’d seen a lot of shit go down when Havings had him. None of it would have been good. “Are you getting counseling?”
His scowl was answer enough. She sealed her lips, not one to preach that seeking treatment might help.
“I don’t need it.”
She disagreed. He was an Alpha-male type and most of them refused to admit they might have severe and lasting issues until it was too late. Of course he wasn’t like anyone she’d ever met before. His childhood had been a nightmare so he’d never had an easy time of it. “So you’re dealing with it by getting into fights with people who care about you? How is that working out?”
He turned away. “I don’t want a lecture.”
Fair enough. “What do you want?”
“Do you really want to know?”
Kat scooted a little closer but not enough to touch him. “Yes. I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t.”
He stared straight ahead. “I want to forget.”
She could understand that.
“But Fury won’t let this go. He’s going to keep pushing until I tell him how they died. I don’t want him to hate me.”
“Why would he?”
“I was there.” He paused, taking a few deep breaths. “He knows that but not all of it. I was asked to write a summary report but didn’t include many details.”
“Is it too tough to talk about? That’s understandable.”
Darkness was silent for so long that she thought he’d totally shut her out. She peered out at the night, just sitting by him. He took a deep breath.
“We were kept in tents next to each other during the training.” He paused, his hands rubbing his pants over his thighs. “It was the first time we were made aware of each other’s existence and our blood connection. They made us do things.” His voice changed, deepened and turned raspy. “We did them. They said the humans we were ordered to kill were enemies, rebels who murdered innocents. They were well armed but were no match against us.”
Her stomach roiled a bit as her imagination filled in more blanks. She just hoped they hadn’t been US soldiers.
He seemed to guess where her thoughts had turned. “They didn’t speak our language. There were camps of them in
the mountains. We hit at night. I didn’t feel so bad after the third time. We found the remains of a male child. They’d mutilated and murdered him. He couldn’t have been more than twelve.”
Kat blinked back tears, staring at the pond too. The sight of that poor kid’s body must have been horrific. The urge to reach over and curl her fingers over Darkness’ hand, still rubbing his thigh, struck her but she resisted.
“We had no choice.” He cleared his throat. “If one of us disobeyed, they’d have killed the others. They were my brothers and we wanted to survive. It’s against our nature to give up. We’re stubborn.”
“That’s a good thing. Sometimes that will keep you going no matter what.”
Silence stretched. “One night they ordered us to sneak into a camp and kill everyone. We got there but there were no armed males. It was only females and children.” His voice deepened into a snarl. “They were terrified when they saw us.”
Her gut twisted. She didn’t really want to hear any more. She liked him too much. “You don’t have to tell me this.”
“We refused to kill them.”
She turned her head to stare at him, their eyes meeting. Relief washed through her. “What happened?”
“The humans in charge of the project ordered us to go back and kill all of them.” His chin lifted and his handsome face was clearly visible in the moonlight. He was suffering. “We refused again.”
She had a sinking sensation that she wasn’t going to like what happened next.
“Number Four didn’t feel pain. It was too fast.” He paused. “Boom!”
His sudden loud outburst startled her.
“That was how quickly he died when they detonated his collar.”
Tears filled her eyes, understanding they’d murdered his brother.
“It didn’t take much of a charge to separate his head from his shoulders.”
Jesus. She reached over. Her fingertips traced the back of his hand, so warm and larger than hers. She wanted to comfort him.
“They ordered us again to go kill everyone in that camp. I looked at my brothers and saw the same emotion in their eyes that must have been in mine. We refused.”
She guessed what was coming.
“Number Three closed his eyes and it was over. I saw fear in his expression though. He felt that before he died.”
“I’m…so sorry,” she whispered.
His hand twisted under hers and he laced long fingers through her smaller ones, holding her hand. He looked away to stare into the night again.
“They demanded again that we kill. Number Two stepped forward and said he’d do it. His survival instincts were strong and he was so enraged that he no longer cared who died. He just wanted to kill something out of revenge. It didn’t matter to him anymore if they were innocent. They were human. That was enough. I could see he’d snapped.”
She couldn’t blame his brother but it was horrific, knowing that Darkness had been a party to killing innocent people, despite being forced. It was the worst scenario to ever expect someone to be in.
He grew silent and she watched him until he looked back at her and suddenly leaned in closer. “Do you want to know why you should walk in the opposite direction when you see me?”
“You had no choice, Darkness. It was a kill-or-be-killed situation.”
“I snapped his neck with my bare hands.” His voice came out a snarl. “I couldn’t allow my brother to kill babies and helpless females. I will never forget the look in his eyes when I lunged forward and he realized what I was about to do. I saw betrayal and shock in them.” He released her hand. “I didn’t hesitate. I knew they’d kill me before I could take him out if my reflexes weren’t faster than the human with the remote for my collar.”
Kat blinked back tears, her chest tight with emotion that threatened to choke her. She wanted to tell him he did the right thing but she was afraid she’d start to cry if she did. It took everything she had not to fall apart. It broke her heart and made her respect him even more.
He lifted both hands with his palms facing her. “I clean them but the blood and deaths of others are stained here. I never forget.” He rolled away, gracefully getting to his feet. He kept his back to her. “Do you think Fury will still want to be a part of my life when he finds out I killed one of our brothers?”
She got to her knees, then to her feet. She trembled all over, emotionally overwrought. “You did the right thing and I think he’d understand,” she finally got out. “Why did they allow you to live?”
“You caught that. I knew you were smart. It was a test.” His tone came out raspy. “They needed to find out if we’d follow orders or die first. They didn’t count on the fact that I was willing to kill my own brother to save others. The test was deemed a failure and I was sent back to Mercile to the same fate as the other Species but I had to suffer the guilt of what I’d done.”
It was worse than cruel. “A failure of what kind of test?”
“To see if they could make us mindless killers by keeping us under their control. It didn’t work. They believed we didn’t have souls but they were wrong.”
“I’m so damn sorry, Darkness.”
He shrugged. “The past can’t be changed.” He turned his head but didn’t look at her, just stared into the night, his features in profile. “I’ll return you to your cottage to make sure you don’t get into trouble. You know you’re not allowed to roam Homeland without an escort. Let’s go.”
“I don’t want to leave you alone right now.”
He turned to stare at her. “Return to your cottage, Kat. Don’t follow me ever again or you might catch me in a moment when I’m not feeling so talkative. I don’t want you to be hurt if I’m in a defensive mood. That’s what caused that fight you saw.”
“I don’t believe you’re dangerous to me.”
He ran his fingers through his hair before he fisted his hands at his sides. “You’d be wrong.”
“You wouldn’t hurt a woman. You said so yourself.”
She could sense the danger. It hung in the air thickly as if it were a scent or a sensation, almost tangible. She refused to back down though. It was probably stupid but she did trust him with her life. He was tortured by his past but he was a good man.
“I’ve killed a female before.”
The news should have surprised her more but she remembered the vibe she’d gotten when he’d interrogated her and what she’d called him on after her class. “What did she do to you?”
He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I want you so bad sometimes I have to fight myself not to take you.”
Her heart raced. She was attracted to him too but noticed he’d changed the subject. Part of her wanted to push for an answer about that woman but she was afraid he’d shut her out again. “We’re talking sex, right?” She wanted to be sure they were on the same page.
His gaze lowered down her body before jerking up to hold her curious stare. “I’m not mate material.”
“What does that mean?”
“Some of my kind have taken humans as mates. They aren’t as tormented inside as I am. They adjusted to freedom better and can provide those females with positive emotions and tenderness. I have neither. I am restless and wouldn’t take to a stable relationship well. I don’t have a heart to give. I don’t do commitment.”
The air froze inside her lungs until the jealousy passed. “You mean you sleep around with other women?”
His jaw clenched, the muscle taut. He hesitated. “I don’t seek female companionship. I scare most of them. They see me as too cold. I’m saying I would never offer anything more than physical pleasure.”
He was hot. She totally disagreed with the female New Species assessment if that’s what they really thought of him. “Understood. You’re not looking for anything long-term.”
“I don’t stay in one place for long. I transfer between Homeland and Reservation often. I will visit the Wild Zone for days or weeks at a time without bothering to stay inside
the cabins provided there. I enjoy sleeping outdoors. Mates need a full-time male who is always there to protect them. That won’t ever be me.”
Message received. He was offering a one-night stand. She took a deep breath and stepped closer to him. “I’m kind of good at taking care of myself and I’m not looking for anything long-term either. I’m married to my job. I travel a lot too.”
“Are you married to it right now?”
“I’m not working at this moment. This is my own time.”
His clenched fingers opened and he crossed his arms over his chest, regarding her with a frown. “You’re human.”
“I am.”
“They wish for more than to just share sex with a male.”
Amused, she smiled. “Are you an expert on them? If so, here’s a lesson. We’re not all the same.”
He wet his lips with his tongue. “You want to fuck me?”
She took another step closer, had to lift her chin to keep staring into his eyes, and knew she was playing with fire. He was blunt. She did want him, though, and had since they’d first met. There wasn’t a time she could recall of ever having been more attracted to a man.
“You like direct, don’t you?”
“Yes.” His voice deepened.
“Okay. I want you, Darkness. I’m not looking for an engagement ring or a lifetime commitment. I’m bad with the whole relationship thing. Tried it and failed miserably. Men tend to resent my job and my independence after a while. They are also irritated when they know I could take them in a fight.”
“I’d win if we tussled.”
She glanced at his powerful arms and well-built body, agreeing. She lifted her hand and placed it on his forearm. His skin was hot to the touch, just like him. “You don’t scare me.”
He slowly unfolded his arms and firm, large hands encased her hips. One jerk and she was flattened against his chest roughly enough to make her gasp. Their bodies pressed together. The bulge against her belly assured her he was interested in her too.