by Vi Keeland
***
Bella’s car was parked in the driveway when we pulled up. She must’ve gotten off work early. “Do you mind if we check on Bella?”
“No, of course not. But…I’m dressed up. Maybe I should go change first?”
I shrugged. “It’ll just take a minute. She might not even be up.”
Val hesitated but eventually nodded. My sister was on the couch when we walked in, staring at the television. She looked back and forth between us and scowled at me.
“Hi, Val.”
“Hi.”
I shook my head. “You’re going to give me an attitude? Yeah, that makes sense. I was definitely in the wrong for driving to the Hamptons and bailing your ass out of jail. And I should never have stopped a half-a-dozen times so you could puke your brains out. Not to mention, checking in on you all night to make sure you didn’t choke on your own vomit. But sure, be pissed at me.”
Bella rolled her eyes. “Get over yourself. It was one time, and you were far worse at my age. You’re not Dad, and I’m over eighteen now, so you’re not even my legal guardian anymore. I can do what I want.” She whipped the blanket off and stomped to the bathroom. The door slam echoed through the room.
My blood was boiling. “She can’t be fucking serious. If she’s going to act like a ten-year-old and can’t even own up to her mistakes, I’m not so sure she belongs living by herself at college. I still control her finances, and I’ll drag her spoiled ass home.”
Valentina rubbed my arm. “She’s just embarrassed and lashing out.”
“She should be embarrassed.” I walked to the kitchen. “I need a beer. You want a glass of wine?”
“Sure.”
I poured her wine and motioned toward the back door. “Deck?”
She nodded, and I held the door open for her.
I drank my beer while leaning over the deck in silence, thinking.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Val eventually said.
I turned. The moonlight illuminated her face, and it hit me what an idiot I was. I’d killed the mood.
“I shouldn’t have stopped in to check on her.”
“No. You did the right thing.”
I blew out a deep breath and took Val’s hand. “Let’s go back to me telling you how gorgeous you look tonight.”
She smiled. “We can do that.”
I cupped her cheek and leaned in to kiss her, but she pulled back. “Bella’s here.”
I shrugged. “So?”
“What if she sees?”
“Who cares if she sees?” I thought she was being shy, so I reached for her. But she stepped back, out of my reach.
“I care.”
“Why?”
“I just do…”
“Well, I don’t. I’m not going to hide spending time with you all summer. You’re not a dirty little secret, Val.”
“It’s just…inappropriate.”
“Why the hell is it inappropriate?”
“It just is.”
The reason hit me. “You’re ashamed to be with me?”
“It’s not that.”
“Then what the hell is it?”
She tried to come up with some bullshit reason, but couldn’t even find one.
I shook my head, pissed off. “Great. I guess you’re not my dirty little secret, but I’m yours.”
“Ford…”
I chugged the rest of my beer. “It’s fine. I’m tired anyway.”
Valentina looked surprised, but said nothing.
“Why don’t I walk you next door?”
She’d told me it wasn’t necessary, but I walked her anyway. After she unlocked the door, she opened it and turned to me. “Do you want to come in and talk?”
I shook my head. “No, thanks.”
“Ford…I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I’m sorry.”
Yeah, me, too. Me, too.
I nodded. “Goodnight, Val.”
Chapter 16
* * *
Valentina
I felt awful.
Am I ashamed of him?
He’s a handsome, smart, successful man. What the hell is there to be ashamed about?
Is ashamed even the right word?
Embarrassed?
I felt embarrassed.
The two emotions were similar but with one significant difference. Ashamed was what you thought of yourself. Embarrassed was about what others thought of you.
I was not ashamed. Yet for some reason, I did care what other people would think. Regardless of the distinction between the emotions, the result was the same for Ford: I’d made him feel terrible.
It was late, but I knew I’d never be able to sleep. He might be feeling the same way, so I figured it was best to clear the air. I plucked my phone from the nightstand and thought about what I wanted to say before typing.
Valentina: You were right. I am treating you like my dirty little secret. But it has nothing to do with you or what I think about you. I think you’re an amazing man, and I’m still flattered and bewildered that a guy as great as you would even want me. But regardless of the reason, you do, and I want you, too. I just have this stupid sense of what’s appropriate and inappropriate, and I need to get over it. I’m very sorry for the way I acted, Ford. Can you forgive me?
A minute later, my phone buzzed with an incoming message.
Ford: I’ll need an in-person apology.
I blew out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding and smiled.
Valentina: I can do that. How about I take you out to breakfast tomorrow?
Ford: How about you get your ass out of bed now instead? I’ve been standing at your front door for ten minutes debating on knocking.
I practically leaped out of bed and ran to the front door. Ford was leaning against the house and didn’t move. He waited for me to come to him.
I walked out and stood in front of him. “I’m sorry.”
He slid an arm around my waist and pulled me against him. “You need to stop giving a shit what other people think. Appropriate and inappropriate doesn’t matter if you want something and you’re not hurting anyone.”
I nodded. “I know. I need to work on it. And if it makes you feel any better, it’s not just you. I love white pants, and I still won’t wear them after Labor Day because of some archaic fashion rule.”
Ford’s lip twitched. “Well, now I don’t feel so bad.”
I rested both my hands on his chest. “It’s not going to happen overnight. But I’ll work on it.”
Ford’s hand slid down to my ass. “I’d be happy to help you work on being inappropriate”
I laughed. “I bet you would.”
He lowered his head and brushed his lips against mine. “I can’t stay mad at you.”
On that note, I needed to address what had started this whole thing. “I still don’t think it’s a good idea for us to be together in front of Annabella.”
Ford crossed his arms, and a muscle in his jaw flexed.
“But it’s not what you think. I know you’re upset with her now, but you’re her role model. She looks up to you. Teenagers pay attention to what people do, more than what they say. Do you really want to show her it’s okay to have a summer fling? She’s not going to understand why it would be okay for you and not her.”
Ford thought about it for a minute. “Fine. I guess you’re right. Her defense about getting herself in trouble by using a fake ID is that I used to drink when I was underage. It makes it hard to say something’s wrong when you’ve done the same things.”
“Exactly.”
Ford cupped my cheek. “See? We’re a good balance. I’ll help you get the inappropriate stick out of your ass, and you’ll help me set a good example for my pain-in-the-ass sister. Now, let’s kiss and make up.”
His hand slid into my hair, and he gripped the back of my neck and tilted my head up. Planting his lips over mine, his tongue dipped into my mouth and our bodies immediately melted together. The man could seriously kiss.
He made my knees weak and left me panting every single time.
“Do you want to come in?” I asked when the kiss broke.
Ford looked into my eyes. “Yes, I want to. But no, I’m not going to. Another night…when you’re ready for me to come in.”
I was disappointed. But he was right. Though my body was definitely ready to go there, I wasn’t sure I was.
I nodded. “Okay.”
He kissed me one more time, then pressed his lips to my forehead. “Goodnight, beautiful.”
In a daze, I watched him walk down my stairs. He turned back as he reached the bottom and called up to me. “You still owe me breakfast tomorrow. I’ll be back to collect in the morning.”
***
My phone buzzed on the vanity. Before this summer, I’d often misplaced my cell at home. Hours would go by without me checking it. Now I took it into the bathroom while I was in the shower to listen for the ping of an incoming text—talk about anxious.
Ford: Breakfast in twenty?
I wrapped my hair in a towel and texted back.
Valentina: Sounds good. Just got out of the shower. The back door is open. Let yourself in.
Ford: Will do. But do me a favor? Wear the white tank top you wore last week.
I hadn’t realized he liked it. But sure. Why not?
Valentina: Okay!
Ford was leaning against my kitchen counter with a mug of coffee in his hand when I came downstairs. His eyes took their time raking down my body and snagged on my breasts on their climb back up.
I cleared my throat. “Good morning.”
“That it is.” He nodded.
I walked to the sink and set my empty coffee mug down.
“I didn’t realize you had a thing for plain white tank tops.”
I’d looked in the mirror after putting on the top he’d requested. The material hugged my curves, but not in an obscene way or anything. And the fabric was nothing special—thin, white cotton—quite plain, really. I wasn’t sure what he liked so much about it. Unless perhaps it was more revealing when I was cold.
Ford caught my eyes. “Take off your bra.”
I blinked a few times. “What? You mean take it off before we go to breakfast and leave it off?”
He nodded.
“I can’t go to a restaurant without a bra.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s inappropr…” I’d made it halfway through the word when I realized I’d walked right into his trap.
He knew what my response would be. The wiseass smirked with an arched brow.
“Okay. I get your point. But I really can’t go to breakfast without a bra on.”
“Is it uncomfortable to not wear one?”
“No.”
“Will anyone be hurt by it?”
“I guess not. But it would feel weird. Thirty-seven-year-old women don’t go out without their bras on.”
He folded his arms over his chest. “Again with the age shit. Would you have gone out without one at twenty-two?”
I shrugged. “Maybe.” I totally would have.
“You have great tits. Better than any twenty-something.”
I felt uncomfortable, but fuck it. He was right. I did have great boobs. And if this modest act of semi-indecency made him happy, why not? I held his eyes while I reached behind my back, pushed up my shirt, and unclasped my bra. Sliding the straps down and pulling my arms out was simple—Lord knows we women are better than Houdini when it comes to taking off a bra without removing any other piece of clothing. Once my arms were out, I reached up and under my shirt and tugged the bra from my body. I was glad I’d put on something pretty this morning—nude with lace. I held it up and tossed it right at Ford’s head. It landed perfectly—with a strap dangling over his face.
His eyes gleamed. They dropped to look at my boobs, and the smirk fell from his face. My nipples were standing proud, saluting him.
“Shit,” he groaned. “Maybe I didn’t think this all the way through.”
I grinned, loving how affected he was. “Ready to go?”
He mumbled something about how he’d be the inappropriate one walking around with a hard-on, and we left for breakfast.
***
No one seemed to notice or care.
While I’d mostly taken off my bra to prove a point to Ford, he’d actually proven one to me. John’s Pancake House had a fifteen-minute wait, and no one looked at me any differently than usual. Either they didn’t notice, or didn’t care if they did—which had been Ford’s entire argument.
Well, actually, one person certainly noticed and cared.
Ford stood from the booth and offered me his hand. He pulled me to my feet and looked down at my still-erect nipples, growling into my ear, “This lesson on inappropriate behavior is fucking phenomenal.”
The sidewalk outside of John’s Pancake House was packed. People filled the benches and lingered in the parking lot waiting for tables—typical for breakfast any day of the week during the summer in Montauk. Ford opened my car door, but before I could get in, he took my face in his hands and kissed me. Like the times before, it was long and passionate and left me feeling lightheaded.
“All those people probably just watched,” he whispered in my ear. “Totally inappropriate.”
I smiled and didn’t bother to check whether anyone had paid attention, not even when I settled into the car. It felt too good to care.
“Do you have any plans for today?” Ford clicked his seatbelt in.
“No. Did you have something in mind?”
He nodded. “Yup.” He started the engine and began to back up without adding anything more.
I chuckled. “Are you going to share it with me?”
“How about I give you a hint?”
“Let me guess instead. We’re doing something inappropriate?”
He grinned. “Now you’re catching on.”
***
Inappropriate turned out to be a pretty long drive. We’d been on the road about forty-five minutes already. Ford wouldn’t tell me where we were heading, but the minute I saw the sign up ahead, I knew he’d be turning. I wasn’t wrong.
Cupid’s Pleasures, as the sign read, was an adult toy store. I’d passed it a million times on the way out to Montauk myself, yet never stopped.
“I have been in an adult store before, you know.”
Ford turned off the car and shifted in his seat to face me. “To shop for yourself or a gift for someone?”
“A gift. Instead of a wishing well at Eve’s bridal shower, we had a dirty toy box.”
“Good. Then these questions should be a piece of cake?”
My brows drew down. “Questions?”
“You’re going to ask the salesperson some questions about their products.”
My eyes widened.
Ford chuckled. “I’m guessing you’ve only ever gone in and bought something, hoping you didn’t see anyone you knew.”
“What kind of questions do you think I’m asking?”
He leaned forward and planted a chaste kiss on my lips. “Inappropriate ones, of course.”
I didn’t want to let him see I was nervous, so I walked into the store with my head held high.
Inside, two men stood behind the counter. I inwardly winced. Of course, it couldn’t have been two women. Asking a strange man a question about anything to do with sex toys was totally outside my comfort zone.
Ford saw the look on my face and tried to ease me into it, saying he’d ask the first question. That prospect had me intrigued enough. Even if I was going to chicken out, I might as well stay for the entertainment.
We perused the shop for a little while. Looking at all the intimate toys made me feel an odd mix of intrigued, nervous, and turned on.
The back of the store had an open alcove section filled with videos. Ford leaned down as he thumbed through the porn. “Watch how easy it is.” He cleared his throat and called over to the clerk at the counter. “Excuse me. Do you have any videos that ar
e strictly anal?”
The clerk answered. “Yeah, sure. You looking for male-male or male-female?”
“Male-female.”
The guy pointed to a wall behind us. “Check out the Back Door is Always Open series. I think there’s about ten of them. Good quality.”
“Thanks!”
Ford leaned close to me again. “The Back Door is Always Open? You said that to me this morning when I texted. If I’d realized what you were trying to tell me, we wouldn’t be here right now.”
I laughed. “I think you’re going to need the movies for a while for that.”
Ford walked away and came back a few minutes later holding a plastic package in his hand.
He held it out to me. Anal balls.
“Go ask if these come in a larger size.”
My immediate reaction was no way. But I wanted to prove I wasn’t a chickenshit—maybe I even needed to prove it to myself.
I chewed on my lip for a minute before taking the package out of his hands. “Fine.”
The shocked look on Ford’s face gave me enough courage to go through with it. He didn’t think I had the balls. Looking down—I literally had the balls in my hands.
I waltzed over to the counter. “Ummm. Excuse me. Do you know if these come in a larger size?” I could feel my face starting to heat…and…I felt a sneeze coming on.
The guy answered as if I’d asked him the time. “They do. They’re special order. The ones in the store are glass and go up to one inch on the last bead. But this manufacturer also has a silicone set that goes up to two inches and another that goes up to three. Would you like me to order you a set? We can have them delivered direct to the house to save you a return trip.”
“Ahhhh...” I knew my face was flaming red. I covered my mouth and turned my head. “Achoo! Excuse me.”
“God bless you.”
I still had the anal balls in my hand, and the guy was waiting for an answer. “Ummm. I’ll think about it. Thanks.”
Before I could scurry away, Ford was at my side. He set the anal video the clerk had directed him to on the counter and took the beads from my hands. “We’ll just take these for now.”