“I was so pissed at you this morning. Not for leaving me hanging but for Kyle.”
My eyes sprang open at the mention of Kyle’s name. I knew I was a coward for leaving so early that morning but I had to. I was in no shape to be around my family. A part of me wanted to tell Patience to go back home, to insist on it, but with her hand continuing to stroke my hair, relieving the ache in my soul with each pass, I couldn’t.
“You don’t have to do this alone, you know.”
Finally, I reached for her wrist, halting her actions. “I do. I won’t dump my bullshit on my family.”
She shook her head. “It’s not dumping for a husband to confide in his wife.”
I gritted my teeth, anger suddenly rising in my chest. “You didn’t want to be my wife, remember?”
She pulled her wrist free of my hold, eyes wide, mouth opened.
“You said it yourself. I forced you into this marriage. No need to pretend like you wanted it.” I casually reached for the glass of seltzer water I’d been drinking. “Go home, Patience.”
She turned her head away from me, staring out at the window. “I know what you’re trying to do.” She turned back to me. “Same thing you did back then. Push me away when we get too close.”
My jaw tightened.
She eased off my desk and my gaze lingered on the six inch heels she wore that made her legs look phenomenal, even though they were covered by dark stockings. I would’ve preferred them bare. Slowly she removed the long jacket she wore, exposing the form fitting, white dress that stopped inches above her knees. Though the dress had long sleeves, the black lace detailing showed off the tops of her shoulders and arms.
“I know it’s well past Labor Day, so I’m breaking the no wearing white rule, but I figured I could make an exception for my husband on his birthday.”
My stomach muscles tightened.
She wiggled her hips a little, pulling the sides of the dress a little lower. “After all, it is his favorite color on me.”
She was right. Aside from seeing her naked, I loved seeing her walnut skin covered in white fabric. The contradiction in color turned me on.
Patience moved closer, removing the glass from my hand and adjusting my arm to make room for her body as she sat in my lap. The irony is that as soon as I felt her weight against my body, the heaviness I’d been carrying all day began to lift.
She placed a quick kiss to my lips but pulled away too quickly for my liking. I was about to pull her back to my arms when she handed me something.
“This is for you.”
I looked down to see a card. Obviously made by a child.
The left side of my mouth curled upwards. “Kennedy is such a sweet child.” She was always leaving her mother and I letters or bringing them home from school thanking us and telling us how much she loved us.
“She is, but this isn’t from Kennedy. It’s from Kyle.”
My eyes widened and Patience looked at me again, urging me to take the card. I did and read the outside.
“Happy Birthday, Daddy,” I read out loud. I flipped the card open and grinned at the drawings of our entire family. “I love you very much,” I finished reading.
“He transposed the I and the R in birthday, and the O and the V in love, but he’s five.” She shrugged. “And he wrote it all by himself.”
I swallowed, still staring at the card.
“He wouldn’t have done that without his hero.”
I peered up at my wife.
“You’re his hero, Aaron…and mine, and Kennedy’s for that matter.” She leaned in to cup my face. “You don’t get to go through this day or any other day alone. I don’t care how painful it is, how upsetting it is, or how vulnerable it makes you feel. You don’t do it alone. Do you understand me?” She shook my face for good measure.
I hesitated and eventually sighed before nodding. “I do.”
“Good.”
Laying my head against her chest, I listened to the sound of her heartbeat. I drew strength from it. I closed my eyes when she began stroking my hair again.
“Tell me about it.”
My hands tightened around her waist. “I’ve already told you.”
“You told me there was an accident and you were seriously injured, your parents killed, and that it was your birthday. But we both know there’s more to it than that. Tell me.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, hating the feelings of helplessness that washed over me. This was the very reason I avoided my family on this day. But Patience wasn’t my mother, father, or my brothers. They’d been there during that time. She hadn’t. She deserved to know the full story…as much of it as I was willing to give, at least.
“My eighth birthday …” I began.
****
Then …
“Happy Birthday, Aaron!” Aunt Deborah cheered, as she opened the door for the three of us.
A smile sprouted on my face and I went to respond to my aunt, but my father’s greeting behind me, had me clamping down on my tongue.
“Deborah,” he responded in the way that made me uneasy. “Where is Robert?” he questioned, sounding mean to my young ears.
My aunt blinked. “He’s inside, of course. Come in, Jason, Jesse,” she welcomed my mother, father, and myself, stepping aside and widening the door of Townsend Manor.
My father stepped past my mother, and I looked around. “I see you’ve redecorated.”
“Yes, Robert and I decided it was time for a little bit of a change. The children are getting older,” my aunt stated, smiling down at me. “We wanted a more child friendly environment. Aaron, when you come over to play with your cousins, you’ll all have an entertainment room to yourself, and we’ve fixed up a bedroom, just for you.”
My smile was halted by my father’s next words. “You’ve not only changed my family’s home, you think I can’t take care of my son well enough so you have to give him his own room?”
I lowered my eyes to the floor. I’d become used to such scenes, growing up with my father.
“Jason, I’m sure Deborah didn’t me–” My mother’s explanation fell dead on her lips when my father gave her the deadly glare he always gave when she dared speak up in defiance of him.
I swallowed, knowing what that look meant.
Thankfully, my cousins, Carter and Joshua, came running down the stairs, yelling my name. Carter did a jump off the bottom stair, landing in front of me with his hand raised. We did our special handshake, that was only shared between us two.
“Happy Birthday, man!” he greeted.
“Thanks, man. I got that new game we’ve been wanting. We’ll have to play it sometime,” I told him, but looked back over my shoulder when my father cleared his throat.
“You won’t be bringing anything over here.”
“Jason,” My uncle called from the top of the stairs.
I glanced up to see my Uncle Robert, holding baby Tyler in his arms as he moved down the stairs. Carter and I were only a few months apart. He’d turned eight before me. Joshua was younger, at only three, and Tyler was just barely six months.
“Robert.” My father nodded, at his older brother.
“Happy Birthday, sport.”
“Don’t call him that. Aaron hates sports. He’s nobody’s jock, unlike your children. He will be running Townsend Industries someday,” my father stated with his chin lifted.
Aunt Deborah quickly stepped in, directing us to the dining area where my birthday dinner was being held. Unfortunately, it was uncomfortable from the beginning. None of my birthdays were fun events…none of my days were as long as my father was around. He was always so mean to my Aunt and Uncle, when they were always so nice to me. I never understood it. I hated that as much as I hated the way he treated my mother and I behind closed doors.
Thankfully, the adults let my cousins and I leave the table after dinner so we could play a little bit before we cut my birthday cake. Carter and I raced up the stairs to the new entertainment room.
“Whoa!” I breathed out as soon as he pushed the door open. The room was huge with a movie theater screen along the front wall, a video game console that played any type of game we wanted, and a number of toy chests throughout the room.
“Here, dude. I’ll let you be Goku since it’s your birthday,” Carter stated, handing me one of the controllers.
“Thanks, man.”
We played for a while, both of us getting our turns at winning round after round.
“Aw, man!” Carter shouted, shoving me when he lost the last round. It was meant to be playful but it hurt like hell.
“Ouch!” I squealed, my hand going to my side.
Carter looked at me in confusion. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lied.
“It was just a playful push. It didn’t hurt that much,” he explained, his eyes looking at the hand that still rested against my rib.
“It’s no big deal, man.”
But Carter was smart. “Lemme see.” He pushed my hand away, lifting my shirt, revealing the large purple and yellow bruise that was a few days old.
“What’s this?”
“Nothing, I fell at school.”
Carter didn’t bother waiting for me to explain. He was already running out of the room yelling for his mom and dad. I chased after him, calling his name, telling him to leave it alone. I didn’t need anymore trouble, but he refused to listen.
“Son, what’s the matter?” Uncle Robert emerged from the living room, looking concerned.
“Look!” Carter shouted, grabbing my arm and lifting my shirt to reveal the bruise to all four adults and my younger cousins. Everyone now stood in the foyer.
My aunt gasped and out of the corner of my eye I saw my mother drop her head.
I snatched my arm out of Carter’s grip, quickly lowering my shirt to cover the bruise, but it was too late.
“You son of a bitch!” Uncle Robert shouted, grabbing my father by his shirt.
Chaos broke out as both men began shouting at one another.
“I should’ve never trusted you!” Robert yelled. “You said it was one time. You’d lost your temper one time. That it’d never happen again!”
Tears sprang to my eyes as I begged and pleaded for my uncle and father to stop fighting.
“And you!” Uncle Robert rounded on my mother. “What kind of mother lets that happen to her son?”
“Robert, stop it!” Aunt Deborah admonished, but he was relentless.
“I’m calling the police!”
“No!” my mother shouted. “Deborah, do something. He didn’t mean it,” she pleaded, lying to cover for my father yet again.
Tears were streaming down my face and my throat hurt from yelling at them both to stop.
“I’m calling the judge in the morning!” Robert insisted. “He will be removed from your custody immediately. Jesse, you want to be used as a punching bag, that’s on you, but I will not allow my nephew to be treated this way by that…that buffoon!”
“Buffoon?” my father shrieked, going after Uncle Robert again.
I watched as my father missed and nearly landed on his face, stumbling into the railing of the staircase instead. He’d been drinking even before we arrived at my Aunt and Uncle’s.
“I always knew you’d end up a failure, but to take your shortcomings out on a defenseless child is sick!” Uncle Robert continued.
“Jason, let’s just go,” my mother insisted, grabbing my father’s arm.
“You can go, but you’re not taking Aaron with you! Deborah, take the children upstairs,” he ordered.
“You’re not taking my goddamn kid!” My father pulled me, none too gently, from my Aunt Deborah’s hand, pushing both my mother and I toward the front door.
“You son of a bi–Bring him back.” Uncle Robert started for us but Aunt Deborah grabbed him.
“Robert, don’t. We’ll only make matters worse tonight.”
“Listen to your wife, Robert!” my father taunted.
“We will be calling that judge in the morning,” my aunt continued, giving my father the same look my uncle was giving him. Her eyes moved to me and I saw the water that filled her blue eyes. “Aaron, we will be there tomorrow to come get you,” she promised.
I swallowed the sadness, fear, and confusion down. I would’ve loved nothing more to go live with my aunt and uncle but I couldn’t leave my mother. I looked to Carter who stood at the middle of the staircase, continuing to watch everything. My eyes narrowed. I hated him for this. It was all his damn fault. He should’ve just listened to me and left it alone!
“You two aren’t taking my son!” my father shouted one last time, as he pushed my mother and I out the door, slamming it shut behind him. He hustled us to his Lexus, forcing my mother inside the passenger seat by her head, and then pushing me in the back. He peeled out of the driveway and sped up even more once we got to the main road.
“Jason, slow down!”
I flinched at the sound of cracking bones as my father punched my mother directly in her face.
“Don’t you ever fucking tell me what to do, bitch!” He punched her again. “How could you just stand there and let him berate me like that!”
He swerved, nearly hitting an oncoming car. He grabbed the steering wheel with both hands.
“They’re not taking my fucking son! Violent? I got his violence. You saw how he charged me. I’ll tell any fucking judge what happened. He’s lucky his kids don’t get fucking taken away!” my father continued ranting.
I dug my fingers into the leather seats, holding on for dear life every time he took a turn. Cars were honking at us left and right as he raced past them.
“Jason, you’re going to get us killed!” my mother yelled. “Please, just, slow down.” She cried and begged.
“Please, Dad!” I yelled, speaking up for the first time. My heart pounded in my chest when I heard the loud sounds of another car horn.
“Fuck that! He wants to take my kid? Over my dead body! I’ll take us all out!”
****
“Those were the last words he ever spoke. Everything went black after that. The next thing I remember was waking up in a hospital bed, Aunt Deborah and Uncle Robert by my side.”
That last part wasn’t the complete truth. I remembered more after that. It was the more that’d continued to leave me bitter and angry at the world around me. It was the rest of what happened that night that taught me, not only was my father a monster, but there were more people out there nearly as bad as him.
“Baby,” Patience whispered, pulling me into her. She cried. I could feel her tears as they coated my neck. When she pulled back, she quickly wiped her eyes before cupping my face.
“Is that why you’re closer to Joshua than Carter even though you two are closer in age?”
Furrowing my brows, I stared up at her. “I guess. We were never really close after that, even though he tried. I was too angry for years. Then he went away to join the military. We grew apart even more.”
“Until now.”
I cocked my head to the side.
“We live right next to him. I know how loyal you are to him, to all your family. You both are married fathers now. Maybe you two can grow closer.”
I shrugged and blew out a breath. “Maybe,” I murmured.
The room grew silent for a few heartbeats.
“He was a sick man,” Patience stated just above a whisper. “Your father,” she said for clarity.
“I know.”
She shook her head. “No. You don’t know. He was sick. So sick, he couldn’t put his own jealousy and bitterness aside for his family. You’re nothing like him.”
I swallowed, my jaw tightening.
She cupped my face. “Look at me.”
I let my eyes linger at the corner of the room for a minute before finally pinning her with my gaze.
“I know why you left so early and stayed away all day. You wanted to protect us from you. From these feelings. But you’re not Jason To
wnsend. He’s dead and he can’t hurt you anymore, if you don’t let him.”
“H–” I hesitated, pushing out a breath, unfamiliar with the feeling of asking for help. “How do I stop letting him?”
She lowered her head, pressing her lips to mine before moving back. “You build new memories, better memories with us. Come home with me.” Her voice was so soft, so full of want and love.
I stood, placing her on my desk, and stepping into between her parted thighs. “I’ll go, but I need you first.” Reaching my hand under her dress, I tugged at the panties and stockings.
“You can have me,” she responded, her voice breathless. Just the way I liked it.
A while later we entered our house. I expected the children to be asleep, as either Michelle or Carter waited for us to arrive home. Instead, I entered my home to find my youngest brother with his bare feet kicked up on top of the glass coffee table that sat in our living room while Kennedy sat on one side of him painting the nails of his left hand and Kyle sat to the right, playing on his tablet.
“Daddy!” Kennedy, exclaimed, seeing me first.
I tore my angry gaze away from my shithead brother to my baby girl, scooping her up in my arms as she ran to me.
“Dad!” Kyle stated, tossing his tablet down and following his sister.
“It’s after nine o’clock. You two should be in bed.” I glared over their shoulders to Tyler who was just now rising from the couch.
“We were having way too much fun to go to bed, right, kids?” he moved closer to us, asking the twins.
“Yeah! Uncle Ty let me paint his nails when I told him you never let me do yours,” Kennedy stated, giving me the biggest puppy dog eyes.
My heart lurched against my ribcage. She’d inherited the same sepia eyes from her mother, and I was a sucker for both. I turned to Patience who stood at my right, smirking at me. These women would be the death of me…and the rebirth.
“Thanks for watching them, Ty,” Patience began, giving my brother a hug.